Xigbar and Demyx are sent to the Gold Saucer for a mission...

Rated: K+ ...I guess...not quite T

Genre: Humor/ General

"Why were we sent here again?" Xigbar grumbled as he looked at the colorful walls and floors.

"'Cuz this place is awesome!" Demyx shouted. "And we're supposed to do recon!."
Xigbar pulled out a notepad an pen.

"Well lets see...This place is way too colourful and bright...Mildly disturbing. They should get rid of some of the- WHAT IS THAT?" He pointed to a huge yellow bird. Well, someone wearing a bird costume. "Seriously Demyx! What is that thing?"

"It's someone dressed like a Chocobo...I hear they're very popular here!"

"Well whatever, lets just go inside already." Xigbar crossed his arms and started to walk through the entrance. A young woman stopped him. (Thankfully she wasn't dressed like a fat bird too.)

"Exuse me? Are you in a group? A single pass costs 3000 Gil or you can buy a lifetime pass for 30000 Gil."

"What the Hell is Gil?" Xigbar asked. "All we have is munny."

"I have some Gil!" Demyx said as he reached into his pocket... There wasn't much. 10 Munny, 5 Gil and a paperclip. "Is this enough?"

"I'm sorry," She replied, "You need 3000 Gil to get in."

Xigbar summoned his arrow guns. "Let us in or i'll shoot you and your little bird too."

She smiled nervously. "5 Gil it is then. Welcome to the Gold Saucer!" The inside was even more colourful, with rainbow passages, each one leading to a different part of the theme park.

"I guess we gotta go to all these places.." Demyx said. "Well there's 'Chocobo', 'Battle', 'Wonder'..." Suddenly a staff member walked up to the two Nobodies.

"Tonight's Enchantment Night!" He said. "All the attractions are free. How 'bout it you two? There's going to be an entertaining show in Event Square!"

Demyx turned to Xigbar. "Come on! Let's go!" Xigbar sighed and followed Demyx to Event Square. There were rows of seats and a big stage at the front of the room.

A voice called out to them. "Congratulations! You are our 100th couple today! You two will be the leads in tonight's show!"

"Couple?" Xigbar shook his head.

"This sound fun! Please Xiggy!" He begged. "Please please, please!"

"Only if you promise to never EVER call me 'Xiggy' again!"

"YAY! Thank you Xiggy...bar... Xigbar."

The Narrator started speaking. The performance had begun.

"Long, long ago... An evil shadow appeared over the peaceful kingdom of Galdia... Princess Rosa was just kidnapped by the Evil Dragon King, Valvados. What will become of her? Just then, the legendary hero, Alfred appears!"
Demyx walked out on to the stage, looking slightly confused. Then, an actor dressed as a knight twirled out onto the stage.

"Oh... You must be the legendary hero... Alfred!" He said. Demyx shrugged.
"Hey, it's your line."

"Me?"

"Yeah, you. Ahem! Oh... You must be the legendary hero... Alfred! I know in my soul. Please... please save Princess Rosa! Now... Please talk... to the King...!"
A king twirled out onto the stage.

"Oh... legendary hero, Alfred." The King started. "You have come to save my beloved Rosa... On the peak of a dangerous mountain... dwells the Evil Dragon King, Valvados... Who's kidnapped Princess Rosa... But... you can't beat the Evil Dragon King now! Talk to one who can help you..."

Demyx wondered if he should have twirled too at the beginning of the play, as a Wizard did the same as he entered the stage.

"I am the great wizard, Vorman." He stated. "What do you wish to know?"

"Uh...Nice weather we're having!" Demyx said. The wizard face palmed. "I mean uh...I wish to know the dragon king's weakness!"

"Ahh, the weakness of the Evil Dragon King. It must be, it must be... Yes, it must be... True love! The power of love... Is the only weapon that can withstand the fangs of the Evil Dragon King...!"

"But I don't have a heart!" Demyx shouted.

The narrator started again, "Oh what is going to happen next...! Oh...Legendary hero... look!" Demyx turned around. A dragon flew out onto the stage carrying Xigbar, with his hair down. Demyx tried his hardest not to smirk.

"Gaaaaaaaah! I am the Evil Dragon King... Valvados! I have not harmed the Princess... I have been expecting... you!"

"Uh...Oh help me legendary mulleted hero." Xigbar said in a flat tone.

"Gaaaaaah! Here I come, Legendary hero... Alfred! I already know... your name! "

"Do you know where I live too?" Demyx asked the dragon.

"And now... Legendary hero...!" Said the wizard. "Here is what will happen... to your beloved... A kiss! The power of True Love!"

"HELL NO!" Xigbar screamed.

Demyx walked up to him and kissed him lightly on the cheek.

"You were just supposed to kiss his hand." The knight whispered. Demyx blushed and Xigbar looked ticked off.

"Arrggaahhh! Curses... The power of... love!" The dragon flew off. The king started speaking again.

"Oh... look! Love has... triumphed! Now let's all return... And celebrate."

"Yes...Lets." Everyone agreed. They all twirled off the stage including Demyx and Xigbar.

"Oh, how profound the power of love... And so the legendary hero Alfred and our story live on happily ever after."

The curtain closed.

"You make a cute princess." Demyx smiled after the show was over. "Did you think that was fun?"

"NO! Weren't we supposed to be here doing recon"? Xigbar asked.

"Let's go on the gondola now!"

"HELL NO!"

Am I evil for writing this? I got inspiration for this one while playing ff7...most of the lines spoken in the play are from the game script so i do not own those...(some of them like Demyx's 'nice weather' comment are mine.

lemme know what u think k ^_^

Sorry i know this was supposed to have 92 one-shots in it but i cant do it...i just cant, im sorry i fail...to make it up to u i kept this chapter cuz its funny and i like it...but lol whatever

and to make it up to u ill be starting a xigdem story soon