Sanctuary Part One
By Shannon Kathleen
CAPESIDE
April 2005
Pacey Witter closed one eye tightly and peered through the powerful lens of his new camera. As the sun began to rise through storm clouds over the harbor, he captured the shot he had been waiting for with a click of the shutter. His hometown of Capeside, Massachusetts lent him the inspiration for most of his photography now. Only recently had he begun to realize the beauty in the small town, which had watched him grow from a small rambunctious boy to the brooding, sardonic but maturing 22-year-old man bending over the tripod at the edge of the dock.
Here he had come of age, kicking and screaming. Here he had held his head high as he struggled through an abuse-filled childhood. Here he had fallen in love. Here he had lost love, watching his heart drive away from the Cape to a better life.
Pacey straightened his back after snapping his last shot of a flock of geese taking a crash landing in the water across the Marina. He allowed a chuckle to escape his throat. It was a vain effort to alleviate the stab of pain that he still felt when he thought of her and to convince himself he had made the right decision. Josephine Potter, his childhood friend and love since high school, had needed to leave this town for a better life with out his strings pulling her back, he reminded himself.
It had just been a high school romance, he told himself as he started to collect his camera equipment, shaking off the memory of the mistake he had made, the words she had said, and his final sacrifice.
Time had come for his early morning shift at the Capeside Yacht Club. After two years working giving tourists and locals sailing lessons, he had been promoted to manager of the rental boats and even some small yachts, but he still enjoyed giving the occasional sailing lesson. Most of the time it seemed more like a hobby than work.
Pacey spotted Mitch Leery, his childhood best friend's father, steering his new luxury motorboat toward his own private dock as Pacey unlocked the shed that he called his office. He placed his camera equipment in his filing cabinet and jogged down to greet the closest thing he had to a father. Although his biological father was well known in this town as chief of police, John Witter had never shared with him any secrets to becoming a man.
Pacey had not seen Mitch in several weeks except from a distance running his hugely successful seafood restaurant, and was suddenly was eager to catch up with his surrogate family. Pacey held a hand up as a slight wave as he helped tie up the boat. Mitch was greeted by Pacey's usual blinding toothy grin that always made people question what he had been up to. Through his smile, Mitch could see the young boy he had practically raised along side his own son, so lately it shocked him to see a grown man in front of his face with an outstretched hand.
"Pacey, how's life been treating you?" Mitch reached out for the strong handshake. Pacey gripped his hand, trying to prove the man he had become. "You need to come over for dinner with Gale and me sometime. It's lonely these days with Dawson going to school in California."
Things have never been the same with the two friends since their tug-of-war over Joey's affection that before had always been reserved for Dawson, which Pacey had won in the end. Mitch knew those kinds of changes happen while growing up. But the years without Joey had lent for some rebuilding with the friends, and Mitch was glad to see that happen.
"Well, life's fair.... but things are starting to go my way, so I'd better get ready for the disaster that's destined to tear it all down," Pacey hinted he had news to tell Mitch. "I've just finished my sophomore year at Capeside Community College - a junior in need of a new school now." Pacey boasted with sarcasm and chuckled smartly.
Mitch laughed along with Pacey hiding the fact that he was extremely proud Pacey had returned to school under his own influence and finance.
The wind started to blow harder as the men made their way to the covered shops alongside the docks. The storm seemed to be gaining strength.
"Well, it looks like someone you know won't need anymore late night cramming sessions," Mitch said mysteriously, glancing up at the dark rain cloud that had just appeared.
"Oh, so Dawson got an offer to work on a movie out there in Cali, huh?" Pacey said, pressing back his urge to shout out loud that life was too easy for Dawson. "Did he drop out of school? Ah, no, no, no, Mitch, you should tell him that education is the key to success even for Spielberg." Pacey rolled his eyes and Mitch recognized the sarcasm instantly.
"Well, not exactly..." Mitch turned to look at the tall boyish man. "It's Joey. She's graduating from NYU in two weeks; I just received my invitation."
Pacey's heart stopped beating.
NEW YORK
Same day
Jen Lindley ran to catch up to Andie McPhee, when she recognized her friend hidden under her umbrella trying desperately to hail a cab.
"Hey, Andie," Jen shouted. "Wher're you headed with all of your worldly possessions?"
"Hi Jen," Andie laughed to think of how she must have looked with all her luggage under a tiny umbrella in the rain. "Well, Jack called and said he wanted to visit with Mom this weekend."
Jen nodded.
"I hate to leave Joey all alone in that apartment." Andie winced as she stretched her arm into the air hoping one of the taxies would stop.
"Is she still having trouble sleeping?" Jen asked, realizing she had not made an effort to see Joey in almost two weeks.
"Yeah, and don't you tell anyone I told you that. I don't even think she knows I suspect that much. I just think she has this huge amount of pressure on her to be successful now that college is over. I know she has been on interview after interview. I don't think you could truthfully say that Joey has ever failed at anything though.
"Yeah, I know, it's disgusting." Jen rolled her eyes. "The perfect are always harder on themselves."
"Well, seriously, I think Joey is in some kind of trouble." Andie lowered her arm and turned to her high school turned college friend. "She doesn't eat much, and she is always up late at night, but oversleeps for her classes the next day."
"Well, please do me a favor, Andie." Jen said. "Please tell me if you hear Will call her or come over." Andie looked puzzled by the request.
"Well, OK." Andie said as a taxi finally pulled up. "But he seems like the best thing for her if she is feeling too much pressure. He seems like a sweet guy."
"Yeah, a real sweetheart," Jen said under her breath as she waved from under her umbrella on the sidewalk at the departing taxi.
Jen turned around to see Joey with her head bent letting her hair fall from her hood into her face hurrying toward her apartment building.
"Joey, hi." Jen called out to her.
Her high school friend looked at her with sheer terror for a second, but forced her face to settle back naturally. "Oh, hi Jen," Joey smiled, showing a small hint of relief, but instantly sucked back in all emotion. "I'm sorry, but I can't stop now. Let's talk later."
Joey Potter ran into her apartment building just as a torrent of rain began to fall on the New York streets. She lowered her rain hood from her thick sable hair damp from the drizzle she had walked through. What a great time to run into Jen, she thought shaking her head at the near miss.
Joey ducked into the modest apartment she shared with Andie, who had settled on NYU when Harvard admissions edged her out of contention. The two friends lived comfortably with Joey's grant and scholarship money and Andie's family resources. She felt the warm comfort of home embrace her as she closed and leaned against the heavily bolted door on the stress of the city.
It had been a rainy spring in the city, making her actually want to return to Capeside. But maybe it was because there was something special about this homecoming - she was a college graduate. Joey had yearned to leave Capeside badly at 18 years old to attend New York University. She wanted to leave the town that had always considered her an outsider. She had never asked for the negative attention the town gave to her for her father's incarceration and her sister's interracial relationship. Since she had moved to New York, Joey did not miss the muffled murmurs of the neighbors. How could anyone consider her second class with the piece of paper she would earn in a couple weeks?
Joey was secretly glad when she read the note on the refrigerator from Andie.
The alert light flashed on the answering machine. Joey checked the caller ID and noticed her boyfriend Will's number listed several times. Joey let the machine run, and a husky, shame-filled voice sounded on the recording; she deleted the message, cutting off his pleas.
Passing through the apartment, Joey glanced at herself in a small mirror in the hallway. Although her image was slightly distorted, she was able to take a long look for the first time without turning away. Her shoulder length thick hair hung close to her eye, hiding the slight discoloration around her temple creeping toward her eye. Just give him time, she told herself. He will stop this violence when you stop making him crazy. He is just under pressure, Joey told herself.
That night, Joey had just fallen asleep on the couch when a pounding on the door woke her at one a.m. She jolted awake and felt the goose bumps ripple over her entire body. Wrapping the blanket around her shoulders, she padded over the cold hard wood floor softly to make sure the dead bolt was locked. Joey peered through the peephole in the door to the sight of her boyfriend leaning against the doorframe with one arm, his head hanging down.
"Joey, sweetheart," Will's softened voice seeped through the small cracks in the heavy door, "Are you home? I just wanted to come by and see how you are. I am sorry about the argument we had…but I just went crazy when I saw you talking to that guy at school. I just get a little jealous…I know, but we live in such different worlds. This first year in this firm has been so overwhelming…we never get to see each other very much…"
Will trailed off from his stream of consciousness. Joey leaned with her back against the door, her knees slowly sinking, failing to hold her up. Joey hardly recognized herself. She felt completely in love with this man, who seemed to have such a firm grasp on her. She had never let anyone control her this much. She had never had much of an authority figure in her life after her mother died and her father went to prison. Sometimes his possession of her made her feel safe and loved. Maybe it was just his way of showing he cared, she suddenly thought.
Joey heard him turn away from the door and walk slowly down the hallway. Gaining strength suddenly, Joey jumped to her feet, unlocked the door and swung it open to fall into his waiting open arms as if he predicted she would.
Sanctuary Part Two
By Shannon Kathleen
CAPESIDE
Earlier that day
Stinging drops of rain started to pound down on Pacey just as Mitch handed him a heavy cream-colored envelope from his coat pocket. It hurt to think he did not know what was going on in Joey's life.
"I thought you might want this," Mitch said mysteriously.
As Pacey clutched the envelope, Mitch Leery caught sight of his wife Gale summoning him from the deck of Leery's Fresh Fish. Mitch offered the invitation to dinner again, but left Pacey standing in the rain, his eyes glassing over slightly and his throat burning. Pacey continued to realize he had made one of the biggest mistakes in his life in not being an important part of the life Joey had made for herself. Initially, he thought he would feel left behind because he had been part of the past she wanted to escape. Actually, all he felt was pride for her welling up in his chest.
Pacey soon realized he was getting drenched as he stood holding the invitation. He tucked it under his shirt close to his chest as he raced in his dockside office. For the rest of the day, Pacey tried to work, but he could not help continuing to sneak a glance at the portrait of the girl he knew he would love the rest of his life.
Amidst the changes he saw in her due to passing time, Pacey noticed Joey's youthful spirit shining through. The long hair he used to bury his face into was cut in a shoulder-length style that curled gently toward her slim neck. The style gave her a very feminine grown-up look. Behind her picture, he found a single ticket to the commencement the first week of May. Had Mitch given him his ticket? Pacey froze wondering what Mitch knew about the past and about his feelings. Was it that obvious?
"What are you staring at?" A voice sounded from the other end of the building.
A startled Pacey snapped his focus away from the picture. He slid it under his desk calendar with the invitation as Rachel Torrington closed in on his desk. How long had she been watching him, he wondered. Pacey rose to return the open-mouthed kiss she planted on his lips. For the first time, he did not close his eyes though.
Rachel pulled away from him, and stared into his eyes while keeping a firm grip on his face.
"Have you been thinking about me?" Rachel asked with a licentious expression. "I thought I would skip study hall to see if you needed me."
"Needed you?" Pacey asked with wide-eyes innocence.
Rachel swatted his cheek gently. Their secret tryst had turned into a 4-month fling. He told himself he would not call it anything more than a fling. She was a tall blonde 18-year-old high school student, who was just beginning to explore her sexuality. But being with such a young girl felt boring now most of the time.
Rachel was one of the privileged Capeside natives he had grown to detest through his childhood. But she moonlighted as the wild child of her senior class, which was more Pacey's style. She was about to graduate at the end of the month and ached for a ticket out of this town like most young people.
So, Pacey knew he could count on at least one more month of this "fling." Maybe this time he would be the one to leave before she had a chance.
LOS ANGELES
Same day
Dawson Leery picked up the mail as he walked into his small studio in Torrance, CA. He had chosen an affordable apartment as close to the beach as his parent's budget would allow and only about 30 minutes from Hollywood and the UCLA Film and Television School. This was a dream come true. He wasn't a successful director yet, which was his ultimate goal, but he could almost smell it.
A heavy cream-colored envelope slipped away from his film magazine and utilities bill. The handwriting spelled his name with the no-nonsense, swiftly written letters that seemed to have matured over the years right in front of his eyes. Dawson sliced open the envelope gently and peeled the flaps of the formal commencement invitation away to reveal a recent studio picture of Joey. She would become the first of his high school friends to graduate from college, and she deserved it the most too, he thought with pride. From behind the photograph, a folded piece of pale blue paper slipped out.
The latest message from my tin can here in New York connected by a string to yours in LA.
Dearest Dawson,
So, somebody in Hollywood finally recognized the next Spielberg? Congrats on your internship. I know it will be tough (especially for you) to start at the bottom, but it will pay off…and being at such a well-known studio could not hurt either. Do you know what your slave labor duties are yet?
I hope my graduation will not interfere with your internship because YOU HAVE TO BE HERE. Most of the guests Bessie has invited will spend the day in New York with me for the "Joey tripping on her robe and landing in the crowd" event. Of course, what would an event like this be without the creek-side picnic at the Potter Bed and Breakfast?
Will and I are spending the week with Bessie and Bodie before I return to New York to start my career (hopefully). I have gotten interviews with several publishing companies and advertising firms that need graphic artists.
Well, if you are interested in juicy gossip, I am not the one to depend on. But here is what I know about your old pals.
Jen nailed a job as an assistant to one of the officers of New York's National Organization for Women. I think she may have found her niche, but I am still trying to talk her out of leaving school. Will seems to disagree with me. Did I tell you that Will and Jen have known each other since they were children like we have? But Will is 4years older.
Andie is still keeping me up at nights. We can chat all night (mostly about her wedding), and we probably will until Andie graduates next May. Then when she finally gets hitched…who knows? Her fiancé is just like her; just wait.
You asked about Pacey in your letter last month. I have not heard from him in ages. The Christmas before last, I glimpsed him working at the Capeside Marina still. Funny, he is making a career at the very place I was fired. Andie says he is going to school at the local college. Your father will probably know more of course, but I know you ask me to see exactly how much we are keeping in touch. Well, no contact has occurred in two years, so I don't think we can all be pals again. I'm sorry. I don't think he cares about me at all.
Well, tell me more about this internship. I hope to see you in a few weeks.
Love forever,
Joey
Dawson chuckled sheepishly at how quickly Joey could see past what he thought was a "hidden" agenda concerning Pacey. Every now and then, his subconscious made him believe that some of the distance he felt between the three old friends might be his fault because he had turned his back on them senior year feeling betrayed by their new relationship. He had been selfish then. So somehow he wanted to show Joey the same love she had shown him for years – selfless.
NEW YORK
The next weekend
"Noon…and Joey has not gotten out of that bed yet," Andie looked at Jen who was making herself a peanut butter sandwich. "Come on, I have an idea. Let's go freeze all of her bras or put shaving cream on her hand.
Andie grabbed Jen's arm and dragged her down the hall to Joey's bedroom.
"It is Saturday in the last week of Joey's college career." Jen struggled to maintain her balance as Andie firmly held her hand. "Let's give the girl a break…and did I hear you say 'Let's put shaving cream on her hand?'"
The erratic blonde girl stopped at the door and pressed her ear against it very cautiously, rolling her eyes. "We aren't really as old as you act, Jen."
The door creaked as Andie peeked into her roommate's room. It continued to open slowly as Andie crept in, still dragging Jen along with her. Joey still remained deep in sleep and as Andie tiptoed closer, Jen tried to pull her out of the room.
"Come on Jen," Andie tugged back. "I thought you loved adventure."
Jen finally lost the tug-of-war and watched as Andie sat on the edge of Joey's bed and reached down to tickle her exposed feet. But in a natural reflex, Joey's foot flied into the air and smacked Andie in the nose. Both girls screamed at each other as Jen ran out of the room holding her stomach in laughter. Joey stared at her attacker, who she had just attacked back. As Andie held her bleeding nose, Joey tried to stop her heart from racing. Soon all three friends were rolling on the floor in hysterics. Joey hardly recognized the sound of laughter coming from deep inside her, but it felt good.
The two other girls did not notice that Jen had stopped laughing. She was busy starring at the strange bluish marks on Joey's collarbone.
Later that week
Joey walked swiftly, swinging a white paper bag with lunch for two in her hand. She dodged the traffic of people leaving their New York offices to join the lunch crowd and never noticed when she smacked a few people in the side with her sandwiches.
She could still glimpse him from her position ten paces behind him. There was a little chance he would recognize her in this throng of people, but she also did not want to lose him.
Joey planned to surprise Will with his favorite sandwich for lunch because she had finished a final early that day. Her art projects had been done long before the due date. But Will was obviously not a good person to surprise. From the crosswalk across the street Joey glimpsed her boyfriend step through the glass doors of his law offices with his arm around another woman's waist.
The tall blonde made Joey feel like a young girl again. She wore a sophisticated black suit with a short skirt showing off her leggy body. She put on her raincoat as she walked outside, which still did not hide her curvy figure. Her hair was shoulder-length like Joey's but styled in thick golden curls at her shoulders.
Shocked, Joey looked down in shame at her dark blue jeans and red button down short-sleeved top that she had selected so carefully that morning. For the first time in a long time, Joey was ashamed of her small frame. After she shook off her self-conscious thoughts, Joey realized the crowd waiting with her at the crosswalk had swarmed around her into the street. Joey hurried along as the wave started to push her and she began to follow the couple as they headed up in the other direction.
"Why do I deserve this?" Joey mumbled to herself as she bit her upper lip, clenched her fists and continued to follow the couple. "I would have confronted him in my past life. Who have I become?"
After swinging along the bag of sandwiches for a few blocks, Joey let it fly into the street. The people she dodged and slammed into had no idea her heart was breaking and did not care that the crimson-faced young woman was struggling to breathe.
Continued…part three