(Disclaimer: As a work of fanfiction, the creation of this piece does not imply ownership of the Final Fantasy franchise, its characters, or any affiliated intellectual property.)
The Esthar sun beat down on Quistis and reflected off of the tall, glass-faced buildings surrounding her. She felt the skin on her neck and shoulders prickle beneath its rays and squirmed as a drop of sweat slid down her torso. She was lost. She hadn't worried about finding her way back when she stepped off of the skyways onto the paved streets below, figuring the skyways must run throughout the city. But she'd found out otherwise, and through the architecture looming around her, she could see neither the skyways nor the Presidential Palace.
If only she hadn't left the palace at all! She'd been in Esthar for several days with Squall and Zell, negotiating a handful of lucrative SeeD contracts with Laguna and Kiros; and with Rinoa, who had several appointments with Dr. Odine to keep. Laguna had been gracious enough to put up the entire group in a large apartment in the palace's guest wing. While Quistis had marveled at the apartment's artful combination of comfort and technological innovation, Zell had simply flopped onto the couch in the common area with a big grin and turned on the monitor on the wall across from him.
Negotiations had wrapped up the day before, and Zell flew back to Balamb Garden early in the morning to obtain final approval and the necessary signatures from Xu and Cid. Rinoa had one last round of tests to be done at Odine's laboratory, and Squall accompanied her, leaving Quistis alone with a day free of obligations.
"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" Rinoa offered, pulling an Estharian robe over her shorts and tank top. She'd been advised by Kiros that since Esthar recognized her as a sorceress, travelling to and from Odine's laboratory would best be done incognito. "It's not particularly interesting, but sometimes it's fun to push Odine's buttons a little."
"She almost made him cry yesterday," Squall walked out of his room and stood next to Rinoa, smiling down at her. Quistis pursed her lips and tried not to snicker, not only because he looked ridiculous in traditional Estharian garb, but also because he couldn't hide the pride in his voice when he talked about Rinoa's antics.
"He asked for it! I've told him a hundred times before I wasn't going to stand for that kind of test. He can get as angry as he wants, I'm not giving in." She'd pulled her hair into a ponytail and was trying unsuccessfully to push it completely under the headdress. "Seriously! Are all Estharian women just bald under these things?"
"As tempting as antagonizing Odine sounds, I think I'll leave him to you two," Quistis said and stepped forward to help Rinoa, tucking stray strands of dark hair under the back of the headdress.
"Thanks!" Rinoa grinned. "So, if you're not coming with us, I assume you have other plans for your day off?"
"Not really. I'll probably just stay in and relax, or I might do a little shopping before the afternoon heat sets in."
"Oh, if you end up by the shopping mall, there's a really good sweet shop just a little ways beyond." As Rinoa was jotting down the address for Quistis, Squall opened the front door and waited for Rinoa to walk through. As she became more animated about the sweets, however, he took hold of her elbow and guided her toward the door.
"Just don't get anything chocolate," Rinoa continued on her way out, "'cause the sun'll melt it into a huge mess. All right, I'm coming!"
Quistis chuckled and looked around the now-silent apartment. She sat down and flicked through the available programming on the monitor, but decided on nothing. She fished a book out of her luggage and read a few pages, but found she couldn't concentrate. She hated having nothing essential to do, especially when everyone around her seemed to be a blur of activity. She watched the clock on the monitor count away another minute, then she rose and left the apartment, grabbing her key and the directions to the sweet shop from the table beside the door on her way out.
Quistis mulled over the hastily scribbled arrows and abbreviations, then tucked the directions in her pocket and weaved between the Estharians who walked along the skyway. Some turned to look at her, but since Esthar began relaxing its policies on international visitors, many Estharians were getting used to seeing the occasional foreigner in their midst.
As she walked, Quistis wondered how Rinoa had stumbled upon the sweet shop in the first place. Rinoa was always so curious, so eager to learn about her new surroundings, even if she wasn't always welcome in those surroundings. It sometimes made Quistis feel self-conscious. Here she was, twenty-one years old, and she had seen very little of the world that was not related to SeeD missions or official Garden business. She had never been particularly inquisitive - growing up in Garden, she learned early on that it was not her place to ask questions. And now, even if she wanted to change that, she doubted any scrap of curiosity had survived the years of conditioning.
As her spirits began to sink and her shoulders slumped, a flash of orange in her peripheral vision caught her attention. Quistis leaned forward and squinted in the direction she'd seen it move, and after a moment, it showed again.
It was a cat.
That in itself was unusual. Quistis had never seen a stray cat on the streets of Esthar before, a fact she hadn't considered until this one showed up. She didn't even know whether the Estharians kept cats as pets at all. This particular cat became even more intriguing when she saw what it carried. It wore a bright blue harness, with an extra loop at the top, through which was shoved a rolled-up piece of paper. Quistis had heard of dogs and even some birds that had been used as messengers in the past, but never a cat. She'd figured cats would be too difficult to train for that sort of work.
The cat zig-zagged between the feet of the leisurely Estharians, who didn't spare it a second glance. Quistis tried her best to follow it, bumping into strangers and excusing herself without ever meeting their eyes. When she arrived at the intersection next to the shopping mall and watched the cat head in a different direction, she hesitated for a moment. Shopping for souvenirs and supplies was a perfectly fine, but dreadfully predictable, way to spend her day; even a visit to a candy store hardly rated high on excitement. The cat and its cargo had captured her imagination and she wanted to see, at the very least, what kind of home or business employed a delivery cat. Curiosity she'd thought long extinguished flared to life inside her, and she felt it only appropriate that it had been rekindled by a cat.
She passed the shopping mall and headed down a flight of stairs to a quieter section of the skyway.
She lost track of the cat when it slipped through an alley too narrow and crowded with discarded crates and pallets for Quistis to easily pass through. Emerging from the alley at last, Quistis turned in a full circle, scanning the street for the cat, vaguely noticing that the worn asphalt beneath her feet was much hotter than the surface of the skyways she'd left behind. She walked a few blocks farther, calling softly to the cat and peering into every niche and alley she passed. Finally admitting defeat, she turned and walked back toward the alley she'd come through. Squeezing past a stack of crates and stepping out onto the sidewalk, Quistis realized that that was as much as she remembered of the route she'd taken while following the cat.
She stood in the middle of the empty street and tried to orient herself. At some point, she'd abandoned the skyways for the ground level of Esthar City, where the buildings dwarfed her and obscured any point of reference. The neighborhood around her was definitely not as affluent as those along the skyways, but it didn't appear derelict or hostile. Perhaps she could ask a local for directions. But as she passed the darkened windows of business after business, Quistis realized that she managed to get lost in the city at the worst time of day. Due to the region's climate, many businesses in Esthar chose to close for several hours in the afternoon, during the heat of the day, while residents retired to their homes or to large indoor cafés for lengthy lunches.
She wandered up one street and down the next, fighting a rising wave of panic and growing thirstier by the minute. The heat rippled up from the ground and she squinted into the brightness, searching for street signs, business plaques, unusual storefronts, anything that might seem familiar or give an indication of where she was. Her head ached and her stomach turned, and at one corner, she leaned over a garbage can and retched, producing little more than a light froth. She licked her lips, only for them to feel even drier seconds later. Stumbling along the sidewalk, she slumped against a building and wondered if, after all she'd been through, this is how she'd meet her end.
All because of a stupid cat.
No, all because of her stupid curiosity. Garden had done well to discourage it in their students. She wished she'd never doubted that.
The hiss of automatic doors sliding open startled her, and she turned her head to see an Estharian man leaving a building with his arms full of books. He glanced in her direction and nodded in greeting, but when she didn't respond, he walked over.
"Miss?" he said, waving his hand in front of her face. "Miss, are you all right?"
Quistis shook her head. "Lost," she croaked, her dry throat burning with the effort.
"Oh my, come on." The man took Quistis by the arm and led her back to the building he'd come from. "Let's get you someplace cool and get you some water." They entered one set of doors and walked through a small vestibule to another. When these inner doors slid open, cool air rushed out, sending a violent shiver through Quistis' body. The man led her to a bench and instructed her to sit.
"Argider," he called. "Argider, I need your help."
Quistis barely registered the appearance of another man, noticing only that he was dressed more casually than the other. She heard the two men speak to each other, but couldn't make out what they said. Before long, she was presented with a wet cloth, and a paper cup full of water was pressed to her lips.
"Drink slowly," the second man told her. "Small sips. You don't want to throw it all up again."
Quistis did as she was told, feeling her stomach cramp and turn when the water reached it. She mopped her face and neck with the cloth, her hot skin stinging beneath its chill. Already, though, she could feel her body cooling down, her breath coming a bit easier.
The first man fanned her with a pamphlet, expediting her cooling process, and spoke again. "Do you think I should call a doctor?"
"Hold off on that for a minute. She should be fine once she gets cool and hydrated." He held the cup to Quistis' mouth again. "Once more. Small sips."
Her eyes finally focusing in the dim light of the building, she dared look at the man holding the paper cup. Ill though she was, Quistis' heart leapt at what she saw. He was still a young man, perhaps in his late twenties, with tanned skin and dark eyes and hair. He was quite handsome, though his features were drawn in concern at the moment. Quistis blinked at him and managed a grin. She sipped at the water, and this time, she reached out and took the cup from his hand. He sighed and visibly relaxed.
"You're going to be fine," he said softly. "Ernal here said you told him you were lost," he continued, nodding toward the other man. "Is that so?"
Quistis swallowed, grateful that her throat seemed to be working right again. "Yes," she answered. "I've never been in this neighborhood before."
"That's clear. It looks as though you've hardly been in any Estharian neighborhoods before. You're a foreigner, right?"
"Yes."
"From where? Galbadia? Dollet?"
"Balamb."
The man's eyes widened. "No wonder you're in such rough shape. The Estharian summer must be a total shock compared to Balamb's."
Before the man could ask any more questions, the doors hissed open and a woman walked through, a bag slung across her body and a stack of notebooks in her arms. Argider rose and greeted her. She spoke to him quietly, gesturing toward the back of the building, and he nodded. Excusing himself from Quistis' company, he disappeared deeper into the building with the woman. Ernal, meanwhile, stopped fanning. He handed her the pamphlet so that she might continue to cool herself, then gathered his books in his arms and headed toward the door.
"He won't be a minute," he said of the other man. "You should rest here until you feel better." He smiled. "Well, I must be on my way. A speedy recovery to you, miss."
Quistis watched him leave, shortly followed by the woman, who now bore two books atop her pile of notebooks. The handsome man returned and sat down beside Quistis. "Sorry for the interruption. Where were we? You told me you were from Balamb, but I don't believe I've asked your name yet."
"My name is Quistis. Quistis Trepe."
The man repeated her name. "Unusual," he said, "but elegant. I'm Argider Cato." He shook her hand. "Very nice to meet you, Quistis, although I wish the circumstances hadn't been so dire."
"Me too."
"So, tell me, how in the world did you end up here? Foreigners don't usually go past the shopping mall, let alone leave the skyways altogether."
Quistis looked down and felt her face grow warm even under the sunburn. "I was ... following someone." Not a complete lie.
"Oh? I suppose you're not at liberty to provide details."
"Well, it wasn't exactly someone, it was something." She stammered a bit before throwing her hands up and blurting out the truth. "I was following a cat!"
Argider's mouth twisted and she could tell he was trying not to laugh.
"I was just planning on going shopping today," Quistis continued, "when I saw this cat running through the crowd. It was wearing a blue harness and looked like it had a note attached to it. I guess I just wanted to see where this messenger cat worked."
"Oh, you must mean Wilbur." Argider broke into a full grin. "He works for an architect a few blocks over. Clients send specifications, and the architect sends back blueprints for their review. It's not the most efficient system, but it is memorable, and business seems good for the architect."
Wilbur? Well, that was one mystery solved. For the other, Quistis studied her surroundings. From where she sat, she could only see a large wooden desk, and rows of bookshelves beyond. It looked like a library, and Argider confirmed that when she asked.
"The main library at the city center isn't convenient for everyone," he explained. "This branch is also popular with scholars, mainly due to its very specific Special Collections section." He stood up. "Speaking of which, I have some work I need to get back to, unfortunately. But, please, rest here as long as you like, at least until the afternoon heat passes. There's a water dispenser behind the front desk, if you need any more. Just let me know when you're ready to leave and I'll give you directions back to 'civilization'. Can I get you anything else before I head to the back?"
"No, I'm fine, thank you," Quistis replied, and watched Argider disappear among the bookshelves.
•·•·•·•·•·•·•
Through the glass doors, Quistis watched the neighborhood outside the library come to life again. Shops reopened, clerks set signs and displays on the sidewalk, people walked past. Quistis noted with amusement that the Estharians in this neighborhood still wore the traditional robes, but had them hemmed a few inches higher than their skyway-dwelling counterparts, presumably to avoid accumulating dirt from the asphalt and concrete.
No one else came into the library while she sat on the bench near the entrance, and from what she could tell, the only librarian in the building was Argider. When she began to feel rested, she rose from the bench, wincing at the soreness in her legs. With careful steps, she proceeded farther into the library. She passed through the bookshelves, skimming the titles displayed on each, noticing nothing out of the ordinary until she reached the third row. There, the shelf to her right consisted only of books pertaining to monster anatomy; to her left, she encountered tome after tome dedicated to the history and usage of blue magic. She pulled one of the books off the shelf and flipped through it. It was incredibly old, and much of the ink had faded from its pages, but she was surprised to find that it cataloged far more than the sixteen skills she currently knew. She'd always suspected Garden's instruction in blue magic was limited, but she'd never realized to what extent.
Replacing the book, she continued toward the back of the library. Soon, she came to the end of the bookshelves and instead wandered among rows of metal shelves smelling strongly of disinfectant and filled with jars of items suspended in preservation fluid. Upon closer inspection, Quistis realized that each jar contained a part of a monster's body. Were these part of the Special Collections Argider mentioned? And were they connected to the extensive reference materials on blue magic?
Quistis smiled. Of all the places she could've ended up after getting lost, this library was eerily appropriate. Her opinion toward Wilbur became more charitable.
Past the final shelf, Argider sat at a desk, shirt sleeves rolled to his elbows, alternately frowning at a stack of papers and entering data into the computer in front of him. Quistis rapped lightly on the shelf next to her to announce her presence. He looked up, his frown fading as he recognized her.
"You look like you're feeling better," he remarked.
"Quite. Thank you so much for your help."
"You're welcome. I'm just glad Ernal found you before your condition deteriorated. This heat can be deadly, even to native Estharians."
Quistis made a small sound of agreement, but his words barely registered amid the questions swirling in her mind. She gestured toward the shelf. "Are these the Special Collections you mentioned earlier?"
"Yes. We have a large collection of research material on blue magic, as well as a small laboratory in which we analyze items to see if they teach any new skills. If so, we then experiment to find the best method by which to introduce the skill-bearing item to a blue mage's system." He pointed to a floor-to-ceiling shelf behind him, lined with boxes and canisters, which reminded Quistis of the shelves behind the counter at a pharmacy.
"Method?"
In response, Argider picked up a small bottle on the desk, from which he shook a handful of caplets. The caplets contained a black gel, which sparkled in brilliant shades of purple and blue when it caught the light. The substance looked familiar to Quistis, almost like …
"A black hole," she said.
"A misnomer, considering it hasn't sucked us all in." Argider chuckled. "I'm surprised you recognized it. We managed to break the item down into a substance we could administer in several doses to a blue mage, teaching them –"
"Degenerator. One of the most useful skills in a blue mage's repertoire. It's saved my life a few times." Quistis looked Argider in the eyes and smiled as she watched realization dawn on his face.
"Wait a minute. You mean, you're a blue mage?"
Quistis nodded. "I didn't have anything like these pills, though. It would've made learning skills a lot easier."
Argider placed the caplets back in the bottle. "As far as I know, this method of delivery has only been developed here. So, if the items weren't available as capsules or liquids, how did you learn the skills?"
"Honestly? With each of the organic items, I just … ate a little bit of it." Quistis bit her lip, both in embarrassment at what she now saw as borderline barbarism and in amusement at Argider's expression.
"Ate it? The Caterchipillar's spider web?"
"Sticky, but flavorless."
"Mystery fluid?"
"Very acidic, but drinkable."
"Malboro tentacles?"
"Slimy and … chewy." Quistis grimaced at the memory, a shiver running up and down her spine. Argider stared at her a moment longer before bursting into laughter.
"That's incredible," he said, once he'd caught his breath. "You, Ms. Trepe, have my utmost respect."
Quistis shrugged. "I did it out of necessity. I often had neither the luxury of time nor the means by which to experiment with methods of absorption."
Argider's grin disappeared, and he crossed his arms on his desk and leaned forward. "What about the non-organic items?" he asked in a low voice, as if coaxing out a confession. "You know, bullets and cannons and the like?"
"Well, the easiest way for me was to file them down a bit, mix the shavings with some water, and drink it. I'm not going to lie, it was very unpleasant, but the skills I learned were valuable."
"Amazing." Argider sat back and ran a hand through his hair. "I've always wondered what systems foreign blue mages used to absorb the items and skills, but I never thought I'd have a chance to ask one. And now, I hear that you don't have a system at all, you just take the item right in. You're pretty tough."
Quistis looked at the floor, suddenly bashful. She knew she was strong; she just wasn't used to other people recognizing that. "Like I said, I only did what was necessary."
"That makes it no less amazing. By the time I began my training, the government had already approved the usage of pills for learning ten basic skills, so I was spared the … unique experiences you described."
"How did you become involved with blue magic research?"
"Curiosity and luck, mostly. I didn't even know I was a blue mage until I joined the army and was tested for the skill. After serving a few years, I decided I wanted to develop my skill further, so I enrolled at the university and studied under Dr. Vardan, the blue magic expert who pioneered the development of the pills. He had an extensive collection of old reference materials on the subject, which were invaluable to my education. As he was preparing to retire, I suggested we make the materials available to the public; he approached the Estharian government with the idea, and they granted him the funds to start this library. Dr. Vardan died a few years ago, and the library passed into the stewardship of the government." He paused and looked at the papers scattered across his desk. "As such," he continued, "my role here has also changed. As the senior librarian and only blue mage on the staff, I am responsible for conducting blue magic research on the government's behalf. It's not a bad job, and it allows me to do what I like best."
Quistis considered the documents on his desk and the binders filled to bursting stacked near the computer. "Oh. Is it all right for me to be here?" she asked.
"Of course," Argider replied without hesitation. "As I said, this library exists for the public. All of the information here is declassified."
"Wow." She turned to look back at the bookshelves. "You seem to have a comprehensive collection here. I'd love to look through it myself, but I'm afraid I haven't got the time."
Argider thought for a moment. "Do you visit Esthar often?"
"Only a few times a year. And usually only for several days at a time. Why do you ask?"
"I wouldn't mind loaning you some material. Like any library, we stock multiple copies of many books, and I see no harm in offering an extended loan to a fellow blue mage."
"I really appreciate your offer, but I can't accept it."
"Why not?"
"For one thing, I'm not Estharian. I don't support the operation of this library with my taxes. It wouldn't be fair for me to use it."
"What else?"
"Furthermore, I …" Quistis shifted her weight, trying but failing to come up with another reason to decline Argider's offer.
Argider smiled. "In the years I've worked here, I've had students and soldiers and curious civilians stop by, and maybe a handful of novice blue mages. Never have I met a blue mage so devoted to their skill as to eat a Malboro tentacle. And even after that, you remain interested in learning more about blue magic. I really respect that, and I want to help you." He turned toward his computer and pulled up the library catalog.
"Thank you."
"Besides," he said, glancing sideways at her, "I'm quite sure Balamb Garden will appreciate any knowledge you can take back to them."
Quistis stiffened, fear knotting in her stomach. How did he know she was from Garden? Had she let any sensitive information slip? Should she deny it? How?
"Relax," he continued, "your identity is safe with me. Our president seems to have become quite amicable with Balamb Garden since that sorceress incident three years ago, and I can see why. You SeeDs have been well worth your price in the situations we've contracted you for." He typed something into the computer and scrolled through a long list.
"How did you know I was from Balamb Garden?"
"Simple deduction, really. You told me you're from Balamb, and you told me you're a blue mage." He shrugged. "There's only one organization in Balamb that trains and employs blue mages, and that's Garden. I just assumed that since you travel to Esthar several times a year, it must be on SeeD business."
Quistis sighed, mentally flogging herself for sharing any information at all. However, she was intrigued by Argider's ability to draw an accurate conclusion from such small details. He seemed quick-witted, and well-versed in his area of expertise. At the very least, he seemed like someone she could talk to without having to rein in her vocabulary, without having to disguise her passion for subjects others found dull. Perhaps she should accept his offer, and perhaps she should find a way to visit Esthar more often, and for longer periods.
"Perfect," Argider said, and Quistis worried for a moment that he might be able to read her mind as well. "It looks like all of the books I want to lend you are currently available." He rose from his chair and walked toward the bookshelves. "Come on, let's get you started."
He grinned like a schoolboy as he pulled the books from the shelves, and as he handed each of them to her, he excitedly told her what they covered. He seemed genuinely interested in the subject, and genuinely pleased to have someone to share it with. Quistis gradually relaxed, and as the weight in her arms accumulated, she caught some of Argider's excitement. For the first time in years, she felt as if she had a purpose, vague though it was at the moment, outside of her SeeD duties. She had an opportunity to learn, to grow again. Garden had long ago molded her into what they needed her to be, and in recent months she felt her as if life and work had stagnated. This chance discovery, the result of a split-second decision, promised to breathe new life into the embers of her heart. And she was determined to remain open to that promise.
•·•·•·•·•·•·•
The sun had sunk behind the buildings around them, plunging the street into shadow and triggering the sensors on the streetlights. As offices closed, restaurants opened, spilling light onto the sidewalk and filling the air with exotic and appetizing aromas. Several people greeted Argider in passing, some by name, and in this neighborhood, all of them cast curious glances at Quistis. Argider simply replied to those who asked that she was an unlucky tourist that had gotten turned around, and most of them expressed sympathy and wished her a good evening before continuing to their destinations.
Eventually, a staircase came into view, leading to a section of the skyway. "There's a lift station not far from here," Argider said. He handed her a slip of paper. "I've written the directions to and from the library and the city center, so when you come to return the books, you won't have to repeat your ordeal."
Quistis laughed. "I appreciate it. I feel so silly for getting lost. For blindly following a cat and not paying attention to my surroundings. Very un-SeeD-like. My superiors would be furious if they knew."
"Do they have to know?"
"Of course not." She nodded to the books in her arms, which she'd insisted on carrying despite Argider's protests. "Besides, I think it all worked out pretty well for me."
They stopped at the steps to the lift and, unable to shake her hand, Argider bowed slightly toward her. "Well, Quistis, it truly was a pleasure meeting you."
"Likewise."
"I hope to see you when you return the books, but if you have any questions or concerns before then, please, don't hesitate to contact me." He handed her a business card. "Now, just take this lift to the Industrial District stop, where you can transfer to another lift headed to the shopping mall. Until next time." He waited until the lift arrived, then waved to her and started walking back.
As the shield materialized around the lift, Quistis craned her neck to catch sight of him walking away, then settled in for the ride.
The lights of the city center seemed too bright to her now, and she squinted into the glare of a shopping mall terminal as she purchased an elixir to treat her sunburn. Around her, people chattered and children shouted, terminals beeped and lifts hummed overhead. She already missed the cool quiet of the library, the smells of wood and old paper and, farther back, metal and disinfectant. All comforting, all controlled. She shifted the books in her arms, and as she waited for the next lift toward the Presidential Palace, she silently rehearsed how she'd word her request when she asked Squall – and, later, Cid and Xu – for permission to take a sabbatical.