Masquerade of Love

(Part 1)

"Hello. I'm here to see Marlene von Lahnstein."

Rebecca's hands slightly trembled as she clutched a small bouquet of wild flowers. It was not your typical elegant arrangement of long stem roses for a sold out opening night theatrical performance, but Rebecca knew that the simplicity of daisies, red poppies, and dandilions that she had insisted the florist create despite the fact that it was not seasonal, was what would bring Marlene the most joy. A slight smile formed as Rebecca easily drifted in remembrance of a beautiful, warm and sunny afternoon spent with Marlene in the fields of Konigsbrunn. A rare moment that Rebecca allowed herself to be swept away by Marlene from the stresses of LCL and the Lahnstein Family struggles . Rebecca could still recall the overwhelming desire she felt as she laid so peacefully with Marlene upon the soft cotton blanket. The feel of Marlene's soft porcelain skin as she pulled Rebecca closer to her and the sweet intoxicating fragrance that filled Rebecca's fifth sense as she nuzzled the nook of Marlene's neck. There they laid intertwined with each other surrounded by the seemingly protective fortress of wildflowers.

"You know… I have always preferred wildflowers." Marlene proclaimed as she slowly took the smallest of daisies and ran it along Rebecca's arm only to gently tuck it behind her ear. Rebecca always found it difficult to focus when she was locked in Marlene's captive gaze. Those blue eyes. She could loose herself in those crystal blue eyes forever. "Everyone always assumes that roses are my favorite,," Marlene continued to explain, "but wildflowers are by far my favorite . I never thought it possible to be envious of a flower but I envy wildflowers and their freedom to grow as they are. In some cases to expand as far as the eye can see. Unlike a finely manicured rose that in most cases is trained and sculpted and then clipped before reaching it's full bloom."

Marlene's song like giggle was music to Rebecca's ears as Marlene proclaimed:

"It's a silly comparison. I am such a naïve simpleton sometimes."

"No!" Rebecca quickly interjected. "There is nothing silly about you and you are by no means a simpleton nor naïve." Rebecca knew it had been too long since she had reminded Marlene and in that moment the words came with ease. "I love you Marlene. I have always loved you."

"Excuse me. Miss. Miss!"

Rebecca was quickly jolted back to current time by the stagehand inquisitively questioning Rebecca's intentions. And with arms crossed guarded the backstage entrance.

"I'm sorry Miss. We were given specific instruction to limit the number of visitors backstage after the performance to a few selective family members and close friends. Countess von Lahnstein will be making a formal appearance in approximately an hour in the foyer of the theatre. If you would like to approach her then." informed the stout and gruff man before her.

A few family and close friends.

There was a time where Rebecca felt that she was Marlene's family. Was that still true? Was she even considered a friend anymore? Despite the amicable departure with Marlene when she left for L.A. Rebecca had had very little contact with Marlene within the last 6 months. There was the occasional text message "Hope you are well." from Marlene. So many times Rebecca fought the urge to reply: "NO! I am not well! I have not been well since you left." But she would only reply with a very distant "Doing very well Thank you. I wish the same for you". She never once let Marlene know of the many sleepless nights, since her departure that she laid in their bed staring in the dark and longing to recover the many nights she would slip into bed to find Marlene there and pull her close. Although Rebecca knew that Marlene was never aware of when Rebecca would come to her at night, because often Marlene would be deep in sleep. Having given up as to when Rebecca would finally come home to her. Auto pilot had become her mode at work. She did what needed to be done. Her designs still managed to be magnificent and the saving force for LCL only because she still envisioned Marlene in every design. Had she ever told Marlene that she had become not only the muse of Rebecca's creativity but the true soul and essence of it? So many times since loosing Marlene "you are such a FOOL!" was the only resonating words that filled Rebecca's head.

Once again Rebecca was brought back from her drifting thoughts by the now impatient voice of the stagehand.

"Miss! If you would like to wait in the foyer Countess von Lahnstein will appear there within the hour."

In that fleeting second Rebecca, even to her own surprise announced, "I am family!" stuttering the words, "I am Dana Wolfe. Um…." Rebecca quickly searching in her suddenly confused state Dana's relation to Marlene. "I am Countess von Lahnstein's sister!"

Rebecca immediately felt a sense of fear and doubt that her lie was soon to be detected. Sister! Dana Wolfe? Jesus Rebecca! What the hell are you thinking? Dana is probably already back there with Marlene and once the stagehand checks his roster he will know that you are not family. If you are lucky you will be gently escorted to the curb instead of thrown.

"Ah yes! Dana Wolfe. I have you listed here. Please, come in. Follow the hallway and at the end take a right and that will lead you to the green room. It is there that Countess von Lahnstein stated she would be to greet family, friends, and cast members before attending the meet and greet in the front foyer."

Rebecca slowly released the breath she had been holding. "Thank you. Oh I'm sorry I didn't get your name."

Surprised by her asking the stage hand offered with, "Robert."

"Thank you Robert." replied Rebecca as she extended her hand accompanied with the addition of her radiant smile.

"It is my pleasure and may I say that, aside from Countess von Lahnstein herself. You are the first person to ever ask my name. I know that may seem an odd thing to point out, but often I am the forgotten. The invisible among the staff, but your sister always made a point to greet me and acknowledge me by name and I see that like her you have that same compassion and grace. It is a pleasure to meet you Dana Wolfe." and with that he took Rebecca's hand and with a gentle kiss to the top opened the stage door.

Marlene. Everyone who came in her presence was touched by her. How had Rebecca not been in tuned at the time with how Marlene positively effected everyone around her. How had she not been aware of how much Marlene improved the quality of her life. How Marlene had made her a better person in her attempts to open Rebecca's eyes to those supportive people around her and not just her cut throat family members. Once again "You FOOL!" flashed in her thoughts. Robert's words of praise for Marlene only made Rebecca's need to see Marlene more intense.

The walk down the hallway although relatively short seemed like a mile to Rebecca. With each step her heart beat became more rapid. She could feel the moisture forming in the palms of her clutched hand around the bouquet. It had been six months since that night Rebecca watched Marlene walk away from her and seemingly disappeared into the depths of the dark night. The closer Rebecca came to the green room the more nervous she became. Her mind was racing. When and if she saw Marlene what would she say? How would she feel? Most importantly….How would Marlene feel? Would Marlene be happy to see her? Surprised? Maybe Marlene wouldn't be happy she was there! And with that thought Rebecca paused in her steps. What if Marlene didn't want her there? Rebecca had refused to let herself even think that thought until she was only steps away from finally seeing Marlene again. What if? What if during Marlene's time away she had come to the realization that Rebecca was just merely a moment in time. A phase! God how she hated that phrase. Often thrown at her and Marlene when they first became a couple. Rebecca always knew that Marlene was never just a phase for her. She lost her heart to Marlene. Her heart would always be with Marlene.

"No. No! I refuse to believe that I am nothing to her." Rebecca assured herself. And with a determined deep breath Rebecca made her final steps into the green room.

The excited energy of the room was overwhelming. The room, although small, held an impressive amount of people. Rebecca easily identified many of them as cast members. Many of whom were still adorned in costume and makeup. The crew in their mandatory all black, and then Rebecca spotted familiar faces,. Ollie all dapper as usual and then Thomas and Biggie alongside Kim and Emilio. While Rebecca had remained on friendly terms with Thomas and Kim she was relieved to see Ollie. She decided to focus on making her way to his side to wait for Marlene, but before she could move a thunderous applause mixed with cheers filled the room.

Rebecca dared not to blink for fear of loosing sight of her.

"Marlene." escaped from Rebecca's lips

Any questions as to what Rebecca would feel when she saw Marlene again were answered. Six months. Six months had done nothing to change Rebecca's love for Marlene. Immediately Rebecca felt every ounce of love and desire ,and then some, that she had for the blonde beauty she could finally see again. It took every bit of Rebecca's self control not to race to Marlene. Every bit of self control not to take her by the hand and race from that very room so that she could have her all to herself. To take Marlene to a quiet place where she could pull her into her embrace and shower her with deep passionate kisses and assure Marlene that the six months they were apart did nothing to diminish the love she felt for her.

The continuous chanting of Marlene's name and shouts of adoration from the cast, crew, family, and friends, however, stopped Rebecca from following through on her desire to take Marlene and run. In addition to the love she felt she also felt a sense of pride. Proud of the obvious accomplishments Marlene had made. While being away for six months seemed like eternity to Rebecca at the same time she knew that is was a relatively short amount of time for Marlene to have accomplished so much. Only proof of how capable Marlene really was and success was all that Rebecca wanted for Marlene. She wanted this for Marlene because she knew it was the what Marlene wanted and needed.

"Isn't she marvelous?" Rebecca turned to see that Robert had made his way to her side.

"Yes. Yes she most certainly is." gushed Rebecca.

"You know the show was almost canceled before it ever began. However, once Countess von Lahnstein arrived to L.A. and began collaborating with everyone a whole new breath of life was breathed into the show. The smartest thing Jacob did was naming Countess von Lahnstein as the new director. Her vision and compassion was exactly what was needed to bring the show to the level it is now." explained Robert.

Robert's words were of no surprise to Rebecca. She always knew Marlene had a gift. A strength inside her to pull things together and find success. So many times Marlene rescued her from one disaster after another. If only Rebecca hadn't been so stubborn at times. So weak to her work and families demands. If only she had had the ability to put aside the issues of work and family to see the cracks and the problems that faced her and Marlene and fixed them.

"Speech! Speech! Speech!" chanted Marlene's small but yet adoring audience.

"Thank you so much! Please! Shhhh! Thank you, Thank you! Shhhh!" commanded Marlene with the waving of her hands. And like the obedient students they had become the crowd quickly followed Marlene's instruction and waited with much anticipation for the words of their cherished leader.

"I just wanted to take a moment to speak with you all before heading out to the grand foyer. Where I know without a doubt many of you will soon be ravished by your adoring fans. I can't even begin to find the appropriate words to describe how proud I am of each and everyone of you. Putting on a production of this size is not an easy task. We first found success in LA and now outstanding success here is Dusselldorf. I know there were many who felt the move was rash and risky when I proposed the idea of bringing the show here, but the fact that so many of you had faith in my vision and followed will forever mean the world to me. I am already hearing feedback from the critics and their comments are only that of sheer love for not only the show but the amazing cast and where would an amazing cast be without the backbone of an amazing crew!"

Marlene's captive audience broke their silence with another round of thunderous applause and cheers. Rebecca's heart continued to swell with pride as like the captive audience she hung on Marlene's every word.

Again Marlene gleefully quieted her audience.

"I am sure there are so many more eloquent ways to say this to all of you, but I can only seem to find the simple and honest thing to say is…Thank you! From the bottom of my heart. Thank you to each and every one of you for allowing me to direct 'Masquerade of Love'. When I first came on board I was filled with doubt about many things in my life especially career wise and with this show and the love and support of you all I now have the confidence again that I thought I had lost. And I also have a clear understanding of where I need to be." it was then that Marlene saw her. Rebecca!

To be continued….