Love Like Starlight
Disclaimer: I do not nor will I ever own Hetalia. Everything belongs to the respective owners.
The Stars
They were always fighting and, really, Alfred questioned why they were bond mates at all, but he truly cared for Arthur and doubted he would ever be able to deny that. He suffered in silence at his insecurity and doubt that the man he was bound to returned those feelings. He knew the words were said in anger but how could he doubt them? How could he doubt a man who always told him the truth even when he didn't want to hear it? A man who had never told him he was loved?
"I hate you! How I was bound to an immature, idiotic git like you I'll never know, but I hate it! You're an insufferable prat that pretends to be a hero!"
The words echoed and rang in Alfred's ears, the silence was hollow and the room still but for the ragged breathing, but each word hurt a little more than the last. He felt his heart break in anguish before the overwhelming numbness settled in his heart. He did not notice when Arthur left the room nor did he hear the closing of the door in the deafening silence left behind. Alfred could not feel the tears that fell from his eyes, slipped off the bridge of his nose and to the floor. He didn't want to feel anything anymore, it hurt.
Alfred felt cold. The doubtless realization that Arthur would never love him both burned and chilled him, he had been terrified of knowing this, but it changed nothing between them. He walked up the stairs silently, an accomplishment since he was generally clumsy, loud, and obnoxious…at least according to his bond mate. He opened the door and stared at Arthur's still form on the bed, he watched the rise and fall of Arthur's chest in sleep, but he glowed wonderfully in the starlight. Alfred made his way over to Arthur, only the slight sound of his footsteps to be heard. Unlike other nights he did not climb in beside Arthur to curl up content and awake to the man struggling to get out of his embrace.
Alfred reached his hand out wanting to run his fingers through Arthur's hair and lean down to press a kiss to his forehead, the only true show of his love he was able to give the stubborn man and never while he was awake. He desperately wanted to, maybe just to get Arthur to understand and see his side, to know he loved him, but he couldn't do that. He couldn't force his feelings on Arthur, his love was already unhappy. He flinched back as the words from earlier echoed through his mind. He had been so foolish, to hope, to believe that his bond mate truly loved him in return. How could he have thought the beautiful, smart, sarcastic, and tempting man could ever love someone like him? He was unworthy of Arthur's love. He had been fooling himself, but he truly did wish for Arthur to be happy…even if it wasn't with him.
Arthur was his bond mate, the bond mate he loved, who was supposed to be his soul mate, his other half. Arthur was unhappy, unhappy with him, because of him, so wasn't it then Alfred's duty to make his bond mate happy? To love someone was to let them go.
Alfred looked at the stars and was inspired by them as he whispered and returned his gaze to the sleeping man he loved. "Our love should have been boundless, across any distance able to withstand. Now I know it to be like the stars. Scattered and distant, never to meet and be together. I'm sorry I make you unhappy, it's the last thing I ever wanted, the last thing you deserve, so even if I can't be the bond you want I wish I could have been one every first star and shooting star I wish it, because I love you, Arthur. I always have and probably always will, but I won't keep you somewhere you don't want to be. I'll never forget you and I'll cherish every moment we had. I never meant to hurt you if I did, but I hope you find your happiness and the love you truly deserve. I release you from this bond that ties us together against your will."
As soon as the words passed his lips Alfred could feel the beginnings of the bond tying them together breaking apart. This wasn't what he wanted. He wanted to cherish Arthur and protect him, to love him and hold him, to just make him happy. Yet Arthur had only ever been unhappy with him, so this had to be his duty, to free his love even at the cost of his own happiness, because Arthur was all that mattered. He walked out of the room and closed the door, leaving the house with not a single glance back as the bonds fell, because if he had he would have tried to change the decision, to make Arthur his without care to his happiness, he would have desperately tried to show Arthur that he loved him and the bond had not been wrong, because he was his soul mate and he did not feel complete without him. However Alfred could only hope. He hoped their love was indeed like the stars and like starlight would shine forever, uniquely beautiful and in different ways to be seen.
A/N: A Change in Lifestyle, Regrets, and A Thousand Reasons are overdue to be updated namely because of writers block. This will be rectified sometime within the next week as I am currently getting help from a friend of mine to complete the next chapters for those stories. Should I do Arthur's POV? Should I continue this one after I finish the others? One shot, two shot, or short multi-chaptered story?