I just watched the episode, 'personal problems' and I can't lie, I was screaming at the screen. Being a firm shipper of Peacock/Slocombe I saw this episode as the perfect opportunity for them to get together. And so this idea was born. In this version of events, Mrs Peacock and Mr Rumbold did have an affair and Mrs Slocombe and Captain Peacock we're stuck on the ledge, alone, for longer than they were in the episode. The first part of the dialogue is from the episode and I do not own it, I just used it to set the scene.
"Weak as water." Mrs Slocombe muttered as she snatched the camera from Captain Peacock's shaking hands and determinedly made her way out the window and climbed onto the narrow ledge.
"Careful Mrs Slocombe", Miss Brahms cried. "Whatever you do don't look down." Captain Peacock added. Despite her annoyance at him she couldn't help but feel touched at the concerned tone that laced his voice.
"I'm more worried about people looking up." She replied. That's right, get defensive just to hide how scared you really are. "Shut the door I can't get by," Mrs Slocombe instructed Mr Humphries. As she clambered past the now shut window, she felt her legs begin to tremble and her breathing increased as she thought of the sheer 40ft drop that would come if she made one false move. And there's no coming back from that…
"I need more rope." She yelled back. "You had all there is." Was the reply she got. Bother.
From somewhere further back she herd Mr Spooner call out, no doubt trying to be witty,"Perhaps you should untie yourself."
"Go boil you head." She snapped back. Honestly that little rat got under her skin and made her blood boil. Though she'd never admit it to anyone, she'd much rather have Mr Lucas than that creep Spooner. The thought made her shudder.
"Captain Peacock if you get out onto the ledge then you can give her a bit more rope." Mr Humphries was the voice of reason trying to come up with a solution before Spooner found himself being battered round the earhole by one very agitated Mrs Slocombe. Again she felt her anger levels rise when she heard him snigger at Captain Peacock, "Unless of course you're dead scared."
Captain Peacock chose to ignore this remark and unsteadily began to climb out the window, to join Mrs Slocombe on the ledge. "Hang on Mrs Slocombe, I'm coming out." He stuttered and she observed that despite the fact he was quivering with fear, we was determinedly not looking down and was instead looking straight into her eyes, making her heart flutter.
She turned away quickly as he grabbed hold of the gargoyle on the other side of the window. If she continued to look it to those beautiful eyes of his, she knew she'd lose all her concentration and due to their current predicament, that could be fatal. "I'm nearly there." She cried joyfully. The sooner they got this bloody photo the better. Mrs Slocombe tugged on the rope that attached her to Captain Peacock, trying to get it to stretch just a bit further.
"Hang on." Mr Humphries said, "If I close this window it'll give her a bit more slack."
Once the window was shut, she proceeded to tug the rope again, only to find that she had no extra 'slack' and that Captain Peacock had anchored himself onto the gargoyle. "Come on." She gave own final pull and he let go and came hurtling towards her. She was convinced that he would crash into her and send them both free falling to the hard concrete below, however he managed to slow himself down by grabbing onto the frame of the window and, in the process, spinning himself around and getting the rope wrapped around his leg. He stopped right beside her and clung onto the gargoyle by her head to regain his balance. She strained against the rope wrapped tightly around her waist, crushing her like she was wearing one of those infernal corsets that Grace Brothers insisted upon her selling. "No," she sighed, "I still need a bit more." God, who knew climbing on a ledge to get photographic evidence of the supposed affair that was happening between her boss and colleague's wife, could be this difficult.
"I'm not moving another inch." Captain Peacock shouted back to her, verging on the hysterical.
"Ohh you coward." She barked at him. She knew that she had delivered a hit below the belt by the hurt expression that flashed across his face, but his blubbering like a baby was beginning to grate on her nerves. He was in the army for heaven's sake. Being brave and fearless was something that was expected when one was in a crisis.
"Purely in the interest of your safety." He recovered smoothly and she couldn't help but smirk at this. Despite his put on innocent tone, there was an element of truth in his statement. "Ohh." She mumbled, trying to hide the blush that spread across her cheeks. She held the camera in her hands, her arms outstretched, just about reaching the window of Rumbold's office and pressed the button. A bright flash emitted from the camera and a small square of paper slowly rose from the front of it. "I've got it." Mrs Slocombe gasped in relief, and sagged back against the wall. She noted the relief on Captain Peacock's face; however his eyes betrayed him as they showed a nervous light. "Don't drop it." He whispered.
As she looked down at the small square of paper in confusion, she stated, "It's all blank." She hoped she didn't have to do that all again. Once had been bad enough but this was just taking the biscuit. All she wanted to do was get back inside, off this forsaken ledge, and have a nice cup of tea.
"Well it hasn't developed yet," He put her fears to rest, then turned to their colleagues and shouted through the window, "Let me in." There was a commotion from inside and then Miss Brahms delivered the news that, "The catch has broken off."
"Get a hammer." Peacock cried, Mrs Slocombe could feel him tense up beside her.
"Hang on," Spooner said gleefully, "I'll use me pen knife." She never thought she'd be so grateful to hear that Spooner would be coming to their rescue. "Hurry up I think I'm going to faint." She wailed.
Captain Peacock began fumbling with the knot around his waist and grumbled, "Well in that case I'm going to untie this rope." Before Mrs Slocombe had a chance to reply, Spooner shouted "It's coming." Peacock mimicked her own feelings by congratulating him. "Well done Spooner." If I was in charge I'd give that boy a pay rise Mrs Slocombe thought happily.
There was a bit more commotion the she herd Spooner nervously say, "Oh, I've broken the blade off me knife. It's really jammed now." Stupid idiot.
"You idiot what are we going to do?" Captain Peacock cried with fury.
"The maintance men will be out the pub in half an hour." Miss Brahms said.
"We can't wait that long." Mr Humphries stated calmly, "We'll go and get them. Miss Brahms, Mr Spooner, you two go and see if you can find something to open this window with." He turned and shouted to Mrs Slocombe and Captain Peacock, "We're going to get help. We'll be right back, don't go anywhere."
"Well that's not bloody likely." Huffed Mrs Slocombe, however they we're already gone. She looked at Captain Peacock who was paralysed with fear, looking like a rabbit caught in the headlights. "It'll be fine," She spoke soothingly. "Maintance will come and get us and then everything will be fine." He wouldn't even look at her so she sighed and looked at the city skyline around her. Not a bad view really…
"The picture." His voice brought her back to reality. She stared dumbly at him for a few moments before he sighed in irritation and repeated, "What is on the picture."
"Oh." She cried, realisation dawning on her. She smiled at him softly as she looked down at the picture in her hand, not quite prepared for what she was about to witness. "Oh my..." She breathed, the smile fading from her lips.
"What? What is it?" He craned his neck round to try and get a better look. She looked up into his steel grey eyes and held up the photo so he could view it better. She choked back a sob at the look of pain that crossed his face as he gazed sadly at the picture. "Well." He whispered brokenly, "That's that then."
They had all heard the gossip about Rumbold and Mrs Peacock; it was the reason why she was 40 feet up on a 2 ft. wide ledge, tied to Stephen Peacock (that part she didn't mind so much), with a camera trying to catch them, 'in the act'. Most of the gossip at Grace Brothers was often untrue and grossly over exaggerated, however this time, it wasn't. The photo showed Mrs Peacock and Rumbold on his desk in a… compromising position. There was no mistake in what they were doing and it certainly wasn't writing letters.
Floating from the window to Rumbold's office, taunting Captain Peacock and no doubt breaking his heart even more, was the sound of breathless giggles followed by a low, throaty moan. Mrs Slocombe whipped her head round to look at Captain Peacock. His face had turned ghostly pale as he swallowed and continued to stare at the photo. "Well, that's that then." He repeated.
"Oh Stephen." Mrs Slocombe sobbed. "What are you going to do?" He looked at her with dark, unfeeling eyes. He sighed sadly and mumbled, "I don't know. I suppose I can start the divorce proceedings now. I have the evidence to prove her adultery. I just didn't think…" He looked off into the distance and fell silent.
She watched as everything sunk in and as half a dozen emotions flickered across Captain Peacock's face. Finally the emotions cleared and his eyes flashed with murderous rage. He clenched his jaw and stepped forward and in an attempt to manoeuvre around her, stumbled and fell into her, clutching her shoulders to steady himself. Her arms automatically wrapped around his waist to prevent them both from tumbling to the pavement below. They stared at each other for a few seconds and regained their balance, before Captain Peacock started to pull away from her and shuffle more cautiously along the ledge. Her arms tightened around him and halted his movements. "What are you doing?" She hissed, her eyes wide with fear.
He looked into her eyes with a soft, yet intense, gaze that caused her chest to constrict and her breathing to become shallower. "They have both betrayed me. I'm fed up with the way my wife and Rumbold behave. They think that they can get away with it. I…" He broke of his face masked with pain.
"And you think that barging in there, through the window, is going to solve anything. You'd probably be fired for attacking management, hell he might even push you back out the window." She gave him a gentle smile, "And, fond of you as I am Stephen, I don't fancy fall 40ft with you because we are tied at the hip."
He smiled back and gave a weak chuckle. "I suppose your right."
"Of course I am." She teased. "I'm a woman and a senior sales assistant."
He laughed and beamed at her for the first time since this whole business began. He then sighed and whispered, "I suppose I will have to get my lawyer to draw up the divorce papers. I've got proof of her adultery now, so I hope it won't be too complicated."
She let go of his waist and patted his arm sympathetically. "Where will you stay? I assume that you won't be staying at your house with her. Or will you ask her to leave?"
"Despite what she has done it wouldn't be very gentlemanly of me to kick her out. Besides, the house is in her name, I have no rights over it. No, I'm sure I'll find a hotel nearby to stay in until I can find some new accommodation." He placed his hand over hers and gave it a gentle squeeze.
"If there is anything I can do for you, you will ask, won't you?" She smiled gently up at him.
"Thank you Betty." He replied. "You have been very kind throughout this. I doubt that anyone else would have been willing to climb out onto a narrow ledge, 40ft up in order to help me prove my wife was having an affair. I really couldn't have done any of this without you."
She blushed at his praise, turning her head away in an attempt to hide it. "Don't be silly."
They both gazed longingly into each other's eyes for what seemed like eternity. From behind the window they had come out of, the sound of voices emerged. Mr Humphries' sounded clearly above the others. "Mrs Slocombe? Captain Peacock? Are you still there?"
"Yes." They both snapped in irritation.
"Don't worry," Mr Harman called out, sounding more than a little tipsy. "We'll have you back inside before you can say 'freefalling'."
"Oh shut up and get on with it." Mrs Slocombe snarled. "People are beginning to notice us."
Five minutes later, after a lot of swearing and plans going up to about x, the window was finally opened and Mrs Slocombe and Captain Peacock were able to return to the safety of inside Grace Brothers. Before they passed through, however, Captain Peacock grabbed Mrs Slocombe's arm, stopping her progress towards the now open window. "Betty," He murmured, "I was wondering if you would consider allowing me to take you out to dinner. As a thank you for all the help you've given me today."
She grinned at his shy and nervous invitation. Normally, he would be more confident and cavalier when asking a woman out to dinner. Today must have affected him more than I thought, she thought. "I'd love to." She grinned at him, "Thank you."
He beamed at her, then they both made their way through the window, to their eagerly waiting colleagues.
There! I hope you enjoyed it. I did post this story before, however deleted it shortly afterwards as I decided I didn't like how I'd wrote it. So this is the new, improved version. Please leave me a review and let me know what you thought. Thank you.