The teenage boy walked through the white halls, the halls that were now so familiar to him. The halls he would never get used to. The halls he wished he never had to walk through. The halls that lead him to despair. The halls that lead him to his sleeping beauty. The sleeping beauty that lied in room 104.
He creaked open the ever so familiar doors. The unwanted, unnatural sounds of the room rang into his ears. The never ending, beep, beep, beep. He didn't know if he wanted that beep to stop or not. Stopping could lead to his happiness, or anguish.
"Hey Annie," He said as he slipped into the room, and quietly shut the door. "How are you doing?" he asked as he sat down in the same wooden and cushion chair that he had sat in so many times. As always, he didn't get a response from her. Only the continuous beep of the heart monitor replied in her place. He continued to talk to her anyway.
"Remember the day we met?" He asked. "I'm sure you would if you were still here. It was that day, back when we were still twelve. How neither of us could find a partner for our history project." The beep continued to go on as the boy spoke.
"You were so cold to me at first. You were so cold to everyone back then. You were always cold to everyone until you left. But I could see through your icy mask. You were really a nice person on the inside. Once we turned in our project you didn't talk to me as much. I missed not being able to talk to you. But, I really think your mask melted a little bit. Even though you didn't talk to me as much, you were still kind to me. I loved your smile you showed me occasionally."
The boy silenced himself, and turned his head toward the window. The summer breeze rustled the leaves outside. They were so much more lively than the girl he was speaking to. He may as well have talked to the leaves outside. She couldn't hear him talking. Yet he couldn't escape the feeling that maybe, just maybe, that she could hear him. He continued on.
"I've watched you through all of eighth grade. I don't think we ever talked that year. Not once. You were always alone. You wore your icy mask to nearly everyone. Yet, to me, you would every once in a while, let your mask melt away, and give me your warm smile. Your smile, it definitely warmed me up." The beep continued on, as if it didn't care that the boy wanted to speak to the girl, trapped in her own body.
"I remember the first day of high school. My only friends throughout my entire life were Eren and Mikasa. I hoped I could make new friends. I remember seeing you in my first hour class, and wished the same for you." The blonde paused, looking at the sleeping girl. Her expression hadn't changed since he had first seen her in this room. Although that was no surprise, what had he expected.
"Around Halloween, Eren told me he was having a party, and told me I could invite a girl, mainly because he told me he 'didn't have many female friends'. I remember how much I laughed at his comment and how he nearly tackled me from irritation and annoyance. But that's not the point right now. After he said that, I instantly thought I wanted to invite you, since Mikasa was already invited. But I could never muster up the courage to ask you." The breeze had died down now, the leaves were dull and motionless.
"In our first hour, we had a partner project again. I was surprised when you came up to me and asked 'will you be my partner?' I can't even explain to you how shocked, and how happy I was when you spoke those words to me. I hadn't actually talked to you since the beginning of seventh grade. We worked so hard on it together. You were still wearing that mask, yet, I felt as if the ice decorating your cold mask had melted even more. You talked to me more, a lot more sincerely than you did back in seventh grade." The boy paused only for a moment, once again hoping that he would get some kind of reaction, any reaction. But all that lay in front of him was her sad immobilized state.
"Once we turned in the project, you didn't talk to me as much. But you did occasionally say hi to me in class, or wave whenever you saw me in the halls. I cherished every time you spoke those kind words to me, or gave me those kind gestures" The breeze picked up again outside and once again, the still leaves blew in the wind, some struggling to stay on the branches.
"Sophomore year began. We had two classes together, chemistry and history. It became a natural thing to partner up and history since there were so many partner projects. That's why, when Eren had his Halloween party that year, I had mustered up the courage to ask if you would come. You said no, of course. I have to admit, I was a little disappointed but it was no surprise coming from you. I told you you could come if you changed your mind. What really surprised me, is that you did end up coming to the party, half way through. I cannot speak into words how much joy I felt when you came to that party. There were so many people there, me, you, Eren, Mikasa, Connie, Sasha, Jean, Marco, Ymir and Krista. Funny, how Eren ended up having more girls that year than guys. But that was the beginning of our friend circle, you know?" The never ending beep sliced through the small moment of silence.
"All of us continued to hang out together. I even convinced you to hang out. You were always quiet with them, yet you would always talk to me. It was almost as if you had your mask on to everyone, but would partially remove it when you were around me. And only me. That's how much your mask had melted away in four years, from seventh grade through sophomore year. I always thought we could be happy. If only I had tried to figure out why you covered yourself with such an icy mask. If only I had known what was truly under that mask of yours..." The blonde's voice began to falter. He could feel the choking pain from the back of his throat, wails waiting to escape from his lips.
"If only I had known what had happened to your brothers, Bertholdt and Reiner. If only I could've seen through your mask, and see the pain you were going through all these years. If only I had known, I would've tried to help you. If only you had revealed your true self to me in time, just a little bit earlier, I would've saved you. I should've tried to help you. I should've wondered why you always wore your cold mask to everyone but me. But I didn't. And this is why I sit here now in pain and regret, and you lie here lifelessly." The teen could feel water droplets forming in the corner of his eyes, threatening to fall down his cheeks.
"I remember the last day I saw you, the last day I really saw you. It was a gloomy, rainy, typical April day. You looked so sad, and depressed. I asked you what was wrong, and you just said 'I'm sorry.' I asked you why you apologized and you just replied with 'I'm sorry' again. I decided I should leave some space, to let you think to yourself. I shouldn't have left you then. I should've gotten you help. I noticed you weren't in class the next day. It was then, that people started talking. Talking that the quiet girl had attempted suicide. I was horrified, when I thought it was you. My teacher confirmed my horrors when she told us you, Annie Leonhardt, attempted to commit suicide. You jumped off the second floor of your house Annie. Why would you do that if you wanted to die? Jumping off the second floor won't kill you!" By now tears were streaming down the blonde's face, his voice shaking from the depths of his despair.
"We had an assembly that day, on what you did to yourself. I hardly payed any attention to what the teachers said, I was just so concerned about you. I went to the hospital that day, right after school. The doctors couldn't tell me how you were doing at first. But then I met your mother. She told the doctors to tell me, and allow me to visit. So they told me. You were in a coma, just like you are now. The doctors said they didn't know when you would wake up. When I first saw you, I felt nothing. No sorrow, no anger, no nothing. Just shock. Then it hit. Before I knew it, wails escaped from my lips, tears found their way down my cheeks." The boy's tears stopped momentarily, he was trying to control himself. He knew she wouldn't want to see him like this. But he didn't want to see her in the state she was in either.
"People visited you a lot at first. All of us, Eren, Mikasa, Marco, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Ymir, and Krista. But over time, they stopped. By the middle of Junior year, it had just become me. I continued to visit you, at least once a week ever since you were brought in here." The boys tears had continued to start up again.
"You're probably wondering why I'm telling you all this now." She didn't respond, only the beeping of the wretched machine, as if it was trying to silence whatever she wanted to say."Remember how I told you that I graduated high school about a month ago? Well, now that I've graduated, I have my whole life ahead of me. I have to move on now. I have to leave for college, tomorrow in fact. I'm going far away now. I can't see you every week anymore. This is the last time I'll see you for a long time now." The beep continued on, as if it were trying to mock the poor teenage boy. He jumped up suddenly, rage roaring through his body.
"Why won't you talk to me?!" He screamed. "Why won't you wake up already?! This is my last day here! Don't you want to see me one more time?!" The beep continued on it's cursed steady beat. The teen's tears were now flooding his cheeks, wails unable to be held within his lips. "Please, Annie, haven't I spoken to you enough? Am I not worth your time? Have I wasted all this time here?!" He asked, his voice faltering even worse.
"Wake up already, please! Show me that smile again! I don't care if you act cold to me, I just want to see you again! Alive! Not this dumb lifeless shell! I just want to see you alive! Please wake up!" By now, the boy had fallen out of his chair, and lied on Annie's lifeless shell, tears staining the ever so perfect white sheets covering her. Wails continued to escape through his tiny lips. Hopeless and endless sobs echoed throughout the room. The blonde calmed himself down finally.
"Please Annie, just wake up already. I don't want to come back here anymore. Just wake up, please," The boy whispered, his tears slowly drying up, his voice still altered from the sobs.
But Annie wouldn't wake up. Annie will never wake up. She will always lay here, trapped between life and death. She will never escape her imprisonment in this world, or in any world. The boy is the same. The boy will never recover either. The boy's sanity will never come back, in this world or any world. The illusion that the girl will wake up some day still lurks in the boy's mind, and that will never go away. No matter what world the two are reborn into, they will never be happy together. Ever.
Hey, did this kill your feels? I hope it did, that was my goal. If it was crappy and cheesy, I'm sorry. Just tell me what you think, and constructive criticism is always welcome.
For those reading Sasha Braus at Survey Corps High, sorry I wrote this oneshot instead of the next chapter, I just had this in my mind and needed to get it out.