And there are still some !
[Extension of This and all these other things] : Didyou like This and all these other things ? No ? Well, that's too bad… If yes, this text is for you ! This collection will develop more some themes in OS by using some ships I already talked about in This and all these other things. Youdon't need to readThis and all these other things to understand this story.Multipairing.
OS 1 : How did it happen ?
Part 1 : She just wanted to help him !
Pairing : Darling Pan.
Warnings : AU. Underage, Dark!Wendy. Dark!fic. Lime, awkward situations, potential non-con.
Happens during seasons 2 and 3, before and during operation Save Henry.
It's a reference to chapter 56 of This and all these other things.
2. AU [Dark] :
There was a light in their sister's eyes, that they didn't understand, and which proved how much Neverland corrupted her.
They couldn't recognize her anymore.
She was fourteen years old when the shadow had taken her for the first time.
The worst of it, was that, not only was it something she had done completely willingly, but furthermore, she had been happy to leave.
Happy to leave her house, to leave her parents, her brothers, Baelfire, happy, just simply, to escape this monotone life which was hers in this Victorian England where she didn't feel like she belonged to, where she would have to grow up, not to believe in magic, and one day, get married.
To become a good little English woman, in fact…
And Wendy Darling, she refused completely at all this fate that had been designed for her and in which her parents were going to lock her up without even noticing.
But Baelfire, him, he should have understood, right ?
Understand her fascination for this strange world that she didn't know, for this magic which seemed to be able to do everything and anything, for this shadow which was coming from nowhere and which seemed to be so mysterious and fascinating.
Magic could make her fly, and she didn't understand why Baelfire was so much afraid of it.
In his world, magic may was evil, but here – she was sure of this, in her naivety – she was not…
She trusted the shadow, with all her heart of a child who just wanted to believe in fairies, mermaids and pirates, in this world where no one ever got old, where no one even grew up.
Where no one died.
And maybe that, in her innocence, she had believed that she could go freely from the island, then come back, then leave again, after she would have decided to grow up for good, she still thought that Peter Pan, those to who the shadow belonged (or rather, to say the truth, it was him who belonged to the shadow, him who had sold to him his soul and his humanity as well as the rest), was someone good.
She would have never thought that Neverland was in reality a terrible jail, directed by a monstrous man who became a child again and who just wanted one thing : to stay alive forever.
To live forever, not in order to be a child, but just so he would never have responsibilities, and never disappear.
She didn't know either that the true Hell was in fact this Enchanted Land from where no one ever came back, at least, not if the ruler of the place didn't allow them to.
§§§§
It was cold and dark the night the shadow took her for the first time.
It might be due to the fact that she was just dressed during this night with her habitual night clothes, and to say the truth, she didn't really pay attention to it, since her excitation at the simple idea of going there was too much strong.
She didn't know yet that this coldness was announcing the darkness in which she would be soon plunged against her will…
The shadow let her reach the ground with softness, and as her feet were touching the ground full of grasses, soils and stones of Neverland, Wendy finally realized how cold the atmosphere was around her, and she began to shiver.
She asked herself if it was this way every time on the island, before she rejected this thought as far as possible in her spirit.
No, of course no, heat should come back when it was the day, right ?
This island couldn't be frozen all the time…
(And yet…
The shadows and the coldness…
They were the only things which were always present in Neverland.)
Putting rapidly aside the fact that she was literally freezing, with a smile on her lips, she looked around her, discovering then everything she had always dreamed to see.
There were boys dancing around a fire, leaded by another boy who seemed to be older than all the other, and who was holding in his hands a pan flute, of which he was playing right now.
They were playing together, laughing, screaming, and they seemed to be the happiest people in the world, and Wendy felt a soft heat invade her as she was seeing them having fun this way.
It was this that she had always wanted.
Maybe that it was the enchantress magic of Neverland which was invading her, but the fact is that she didn't want to go anymore.
The strange fact that she couldn't hear the music of the flute hit her for some seconds, but, some seconds later, she didn't think about it anymore, just joining the group.
After some minutes, the dance ended, as Peter Pan (it had to be him, right ? The one the shadow talked about so much, to her and to her brothers, since the shadow was always around him. It couldn't be someone else.) stopped playing, and walked in her direction.
He really looked like the happy and laughing child described by the shadow, and, had she been more careful, maybe that she would have seen the calculative light which was in his look.
The thing she still didn't know, was that it was not her that he wanted on his island.
Well, not now, and especially, not this way, not as she was still so innocent and that she still had faith in life.
What she still didn't know either, unfortunately, was that soon, this young boy would break her.
§§§§
"Wendy Darling, he then saluted her, I am happy to meet you.
- How do you know my name ?"
Peter Pan then smiled a new time.
It had been since six months that the shadow was coming every nights in the house of Wendy Darling and her brothers, six months that this one was trying by all the ways to attire them in Neverland.
And now that Baelfire had finally reached London, where he had to be, the immortal's plan was finally going to begin.
"My shadow told me a lot about you."
The young girl began to smile.
Yes, indeed.
It was perfect.
§§§§
The fall was even more brutal.
The thing Wendy never told to Baelfire, is that in reality, she didn't spend just one night in Neverland.
Time passed totally differently there (because yes, even if it passed slowly, time was not completely frozen at all. It was not for nothing that Peter Pan was trying to run against time, against death, so he would one day get Henry's heart), so she stayed there for some days, and some nights.
And at no moment she was really happy.
Because, unlike what herself (and other, after her) thought, Neverland was absolutely not a place for children.
Not since Peter took the control of it.
She was here since three days when the mask definitely fell, when the veil she had on her eyes was ripped out into pieces.
Oh, of course, the first nights were not really easy as well, between the terrible coldness which had taken her since the fire stopped, and with the sobs of the Lost Boys who were crying for their parents that they had sometimes even forgotten with time…
But she was still thinking it was just homesick.
After all, she did miss her family too, but she knew it, she would be able to come back home, soon, and she believed that they could too.
And then, little by little, she finally understood that it was something else.
That these children, as happy as they seemed to be, just wanted one thing.
Come back home.
A thing they couldn't do, as they didn't get any pixie dust, and especially because…
The shadow was not letting them go away.
They were just prisoners, and Wendy could just shiver when she imagined herself living the same fate.
Except that her, she was lucky.
She was a girl, and in Neverland, there was no one, since it was not what Peter Pan wanted.
One night later, according to the time of the land without magic, and three weeks later, according to the one of Neverland, Pan and the shadow finally let her go.
Leaving her with one promise, as simple and efficient as terrifying.
The shadow would come back, and take John and Michael.
This trip was the first contact – and certainly not the last – that Wendy Darling had got with darkness, and it terrified her.
She knew that she would never forget Pan's terrifying smile, nor his laugh, not even after years far from him.
Never would she forget this betrayal, this treason of her confidence, the destruction of her innocence.
Unluckily, it seemed like he was not ready to leave her and her family alone.
§§§§
When Baelfire sacrificed himself for them, when he was taken by the shadow, was ripped out from them while she was sure that it couldn't happen, her heart broke.
The hardest thing in the situation was to try to explain to their parents why Baelfire was now gone, and the reason why he would not come back, not anymore.
She could have told them the truth, indeed, but she refused to be perceived as a mad woman.
And if her parents as well as her brothers more and more succeeded to heal from this absence, from this loss, well, she never forgot.
And the adolescent who was not a child anymore, who would never be one again, made a promise to herself.
I will find you Baelfire.
And I will save you from the shadow, from Peter Pan, from the island and its horror.
Don't loose hope, please.
Soon, she would be the one who would.
§§§§
Wendy Darling was now sixteen years old and had no more illusions in her heart when Peter Pan's shadow took her a new time.
She had the feeling that it was her who had to do this, to go back to the island, because she had to sort something out with Pan and his island, because it was her who had wanted to leave there the first time, because it was her who had made the shadow go to their home, because she hadn't believed Baelfire about the dangerous nature and the toxicity of magic.
Oh, how much wrong she had been…
All of this was her fault, and she had to fix things.
Because she had nightmares every nights since two years, because the evil and incredibly sardonic laugh of Peter haunted her permanently, because she had conscience that a part of herself had stayed on the island, she knew that in a sense, she never really left.
Because John and Michael had grown up, them who were just six and eight years old when it happened, and they had succeeded to forget, a thing she just couldn't do, because they were still children, and they still had in them this innocence she didn't have in her anymore, and that Pan had succeeded to ruin during the little time where she was on his cursed island.
Neverland haunted her, had became a part of herself, and she knew that she would be able to free herself just by coming there and by saving Baelfire of this terrible place.
She knew too much that it would certainly not be easy.
What she didn't know either, is that the island never forgot her at all.
§§§§
The young girl came back into the land of her nightmare after she said goodbye to her brothers, after she promised them she would come back soon (liar, liar, liar. Oh, poor Wendy, you who still believed that everything would end well) and after she made them promise to forever, forever lock up the window of their room, when it was the night.
And to never call back the shadow.
After her mother left her, saying her good night, Wendy went to bed, wiped the tears which threatened to roll, faked to sleep, and, after she was sure that her parents were asleep, as she was listening to their peaceful breath, she stand up, went to the window of her room (it had been since a long, long time that she didn't share a room with her brothers), and opened it wide.
The cold wind of the night surrounded her, and she shivered, being brought back in thought two years ago, at a time where she was still innocent and happy.
This time, she let some tears roll along her cheeks.
I am sorry Baelfire.
I am so sorry…
She wiped them a new time, then, after she had calmed herself, she took a deep breath.
"I believe in you, she whispered, the heart into pieces, remembering that it was this belief which had lost herself and had lost Baelfire two years ago."
The worst is that, it was not even a lie.
Yes, the little girl who still believed in Peter Pan and his kindness was still here, in her, well hidden, and Wendy hated her to still want to believe in a monster who had just try to destroy her.
(There were so much things she didn't tell to Baelfire and her brothers concerning her trip to Neverland.)
When the shadow appeared in front of her for the second time, as she was taking her hand, she did it without being full of joy, but of disgust.
§§§§
She remembered it like it was yesterday.
In just one second, as old sensations long forgotten were coming back to her memory, she remembered everything.
How Baelfire had tried, with all his forces, to stop her to go there, how she had refused to listen to him, even by knowing that his family had been broken because of this magic she admired and loved so much.
How Pan finally destroyed everything, how the shadow had taken Baelfire from them, how the young boy sacrificed himself for them.
Wendy never told anyone about the numerous nightmares which had haunted her after the disappearance of the one she considered as her third brother.
They weren't nightmares, not really.
In them, she was seeing Pan, and he was laughing of her, laughing of her weakness, laughing of her failure, laughing of her loss.
It was just as if he was really here.
And maybe was he there, for real, and maybe did she come back for real on the island, during these moments, after all, wasn't Neverland supposed to be a place where children could escape during their dreams ?
(It was not the case anymore.
Pan had corrupted it so much…)
It had lasted two years, two years during which the monster of her nightmares had followed her in her dreams ; laughing again and again of her.
As she was putting her feet again on the frozen ground of Neverland, Wendy Darling realized finally how much afraid she was.
§§§§
Felix's evil smile was the first thing she saw as she was focusing again on what was around her.
"Welcome back to Neverland… Wendy."
She almost answered him that she didn't want at all to come back.
Pan's sudden arrival stopped her from doing so.
This one was smiling at her, this same smile which had haunted the nights and the life of Wendy these last two years.
"Wendy, Wendy, Wendy… he declared with a fake affability. I am so happy to see you again.
This feeling is not shared, trust me… she thought with a cold anger.
Before, she would have believed him.
Now, she knew who he was.
She sent him death stares, crossing her arms, in order to show herself as being threatening and to try to warm herself.
- Where is he, Peter ?"
The one she once believed she could call her friend immediately faked surprise.
"Who ?
- You know perfectly about who I am talking. About Baelfire ! Tell me now where he is, because I don't want to play !"
It was especially not the good answer to give to someone like Peter Pan, since the game was just who was this little bastard, whose face twisted into an abominable smile.
"So, you don't want to play ? Alright, if you want this… That's too bad for you ! Bring her where you know, he said, talking to two lost boys who immediately took her by the arms without protesting, and this rapidity alone was enough to make her shiver.
Seeing the terror invade her, he began to smirk, his smile becoming vicious.
He came closer to her and took her face in his right hand.
- What did you think my dear Wendy ? He whispered to her in a terribly obscene way. That you would just have to come here, reclaim Baelfire and that I would let you leave then ? No… You should know me better than that, he said with irony.
I have great projects for him, and maybe for you too, I admit I still didn't decide what I want to do of you… You presence was not expected by me, I have to recognize it too. You should have never came back in Neverland, Wendy ! He added, as she was taken."
A new feeling of fear invaded her as she was understanding in which trap she had thrown herself at this moment, to which she couldn't escape, and she began to move, trying to escape.
"No ! NO ! She didn't know where they were bringing her, but it didn't seem to be really good. Peter, let me go ! (Oh, how naive she had been to dare thinking she could do this alone !) Baelfire ! She then screamed, desperate, hoping she would be heard by him. BAELFIRE !"
The thing she didn't know, was that he was at the other side of the island, and that he couldn't hear her.
§§§§
Her first night in the cage was more than atrocious.
The coldness, the loneliness, the despair she was feeling toward her failure and her naivety, which had made her believe that she could defy Peter Pan on her own, all of this stopped her from sleeping.
The discomfort of her prison didn't help either…
She stayed there for three days, three days during which hunger and thirst tortured her horribly, three day during which the simple fact of doing her business was a real torture for her.
After three days, taken by pity (or maybe thinking she was too much weak) Peter let her go out of the cage, and brought her back to their tree.
The young woman had lost conscience since a long time, her hygiene was clearly not good, and her face had became terribly pale, in a worrying way.
It just made Pan's smile become larger, as he was seeing there just an occasion to break her and make her go on his side.
A thing he could have done with Baelfire too, but the fact is that he wanted him to be angry at him, he wanted him to escape one day.
But Wendy, she didn't really belong to his grand plan to exist forever.
In fact, he hadn't known what to do of her at first.
Then, he had a plan.
The one to use Wendy again those she used to love, against her brothers, against Baelfire, against everything in which she believed once…
And to destroy everything which was good in her.
Not only, by the way…
His purpose was also to make her his queen, queen of darkness and of Neverland – which would make her even more fall – because he may wanted to be young forever, but it didn't stop him from not wanting to be alone.
One day, yes, one day, he knew it : she would love him.
And it didn't matter that he had to destroy everything in her so she would one day.
And he could just savor the perfect irony of this situation.
Almost with tenderness, he put his hand in the hair of the young sleeping girl, who started at this contact and finally opened her eyes.
She tried to go away from this forced and non desired contact, but her physical weakness stopped her.
As he was seeing the fear in her eyes, not well hidden behind her tiredness, he began to smile.
"What are you going to do to me ? Wendy asked him with a voice which was weak, but also full of a courage which impressed him despite himself."
It wouldn't be easy to break her, he then understood.
He wanted her dark and destroyed, but she would not let him to do it.
It would just make the game funnier and the victory more savoring for him.
Not answering, he just gave her the half of a coconut, being used as a glass of water, that she avidly took, finally satiating her thirst.
Taking her head, he helped her to stand up and to sit down on a chair not far from the table on which there was a sumptuous meal prepared especially for her.
Knowing that it was her only way to survive on this cursed island, Wendy decided to put her suspicion aside, and she began to eat in silence.
She rejected as far as possible in the deep of herself the morbid gratitude that she was beginning to feel toward Pan, knowing it was him who had starved her in the first place.
"Now, Wendy, tell me… Do you accept to belong to the lost boys and join me ? Oh, and of course, you have to be conscious that I will not let you see Baelfire again, it would be a problem for me if you did… So ?
Revived, she gave him a look full of anger.
- You can still dream of it… she told him with violence.
He smiled.
- Oh, this is going to be so fun."
§§§§
The game continued for a certain time.
With a sadistic amusement, Pan put her in her cage, for one, three, six days, according to his mood, sometimes even more, making her go out, feeding herself and drinking when she really needed to.
Then, he let her rest some times, maintaining her alive the best he could.
And the cruel game was beginning again.
Wendy didn't regret her decision – not yet, in fact – because she still had the certitude that one day, she would succeed to leave, to escape.
She still had faith, not in Peter, in fact, but in herself, and in Baelfire.
One day, they would get out of this hell.
§§§§
Sometimes, when dehydration or hunger didn't make her loose conscience, and didn't make her hallucinate, Wendy asked herself if Baelfire was well or not.
She knew that he was not with the other Lost Ones, as one them told her that he had fled even before she arrived, and that he was in a place of the island that they didn't really know.
At other moments – the worst – when the depression and the sadness were invading her, she told herself that he may be already dead.
And when she lost completely hope – it didn't last for long, but yet it arrived – she was beginning to think that if it was the case, well, it was for the better, and then, it would have been better for her if she had died too.
They were going to suffer for all eternity, without being able to escape from it.
Was not it the definition of Hell ?
What could be worst than that ?
She didn't know yet that it was just the beginning.
§§§§
Three weeks…
He had let her in it for three fucking weeks.
She was going to kill him.
Oh, by all the gods, she was going so much to kill him.
Well, she would do so only if she could succeed to move again.
The young girl was now out of the cage and she was bursting with an anger which was more or less contained.
Oh, she hated so much this cage.
Not that, again, she was stopped from leaving it sometimes, but it didn't change the fact that this prison was everything but comfortable.
And the thing is that she didn't like being locked up.
Moreover, the more she stayed in the inside of the cage, the weakest she was beginning.
Even if Pan and the other had not been there for an enough long moment which would allow her to flee, she would not have been able to do so, because she couldn't even run anymore, because her legs were too much weak.
She was slowly passing away, hunger and thirst were continuing to torture her, even if Pan had used his magic to make it so her natural needs would be less complicated to support, by stopping a little her biological clock, kind of.
The lack of sleep was more and more painful to support, and she was feeling her back breaking itself more and more as time passed, and that the painful experience of the fact of "sleeping" in this cage was printed more and more in her body, and she told herself too that soon, she would have no strength to fight.
So yes, just to say that she hated more and more Peter Pan.
Well, more than before…
It had been since already three hours that she was alone, out of the cage, lying on the grass and frozen, and she was asking herself with horror when this damn bastard would stop this hell and let her die.
If there was not Baelfire and her brothers, as well as her parents, for who she still wanted to stay alive, she would have surely already tried to kill herself since a long time.
Talking about that, Neverland's magic was not helping her at all, it was even the contrary.
Little by little, she was beginning to forget their faces.
It was the way this world worked, the more time you stayed in it, the more you risked to loose your memories from the "real" world.
It was a thing which had already began to happen in her during her first trip, and it was the reason why Neverland was supposed to be a place where you didn't stay forever, where children, during their dreams, could forget real.
Rule which had been of course not respected by Peter Pan…
Oh, hell, she couldn't even succeed to move !
Three weeks, three long fucking weeks, during which she had stayed locked up, and where her stay had been cut by pauses and where she could leave during a too short time, where she had tried to sleep, without a great success.
Three painful weeks, full of sadness, of sufferings, of despair.
Oh, and of boredom, too.
Because yes, when you stay alone for so much time without having a lot of things to do except looking at the sky or at the view, you get bored really fast.
And it was not as if Peter had given her a book, or something like that, or even something to do.
But well, since the island was almost always plunged in the dark, it wouldn't have changed anything…
Without forgetting the fact that time passed slowly in this world, which made things worst than they already were, and even longer.
Standing up slowly, she tried to stay on her feet, before grimacing, feeling that she had a lot of difficulties to move her legs.
She hold on with difficulty to one of the branches of a tree next to her, before seeing with displeasure Peter Pan walk into her direction.
Wendy made some steps, and she hid a moan of pain, as she felt how insensitive her legs were now, after the too long and forced immobilization she had to endure in the cage, not wanting him to realize how bad she was feeling.
Because of him, yes, but to be honest, it was not as if he was able to feel any ounce of remorse.
Despite the pain and the coldness, the young girl succeeded to send a look full of anger to her torturer.
All the affection she had once felt for him was long gone now, was dead, had completely burned, at the same time as the rest of her innocence and her beliefs.
Now, she just felt anger toward him.
(She was afraid too.)
§§§§
He was looking at her like she was the most beautiful thing in the world, and her, she just wanted to vomit.
(It was a bad idea, she had eaten not enough things these last times, it would make her be just weaker.)
She would have wanted to be able to rip out his heart and eat it, to crush it, to reduce it to ashes slowly, to see the horror and the distress invade his look, to see his breath become heavier, to see a try of a beg escape from his lips (a useless beg, of course), and to see him loose, fall, die.
And to laugh of it, of course !
Wendy suddenly shivered, terrified by her own thoughts, horrified by this dark desire she never felt before, by the desire to kill which was devouring her right now, by this darkness that she was discovering in herself, and that she never thought was here before.
Her hatred against Pan became just stronger, because she knew that it was because of him that she was feeling this.
She clenched her fists, before remembering that she had hold on to a tree before, and that she was going to fall soon.
Holding herself to the branches (literally speaking), she moved her legs a little, feeling with relief that these last one were getting used again to the fact of doing something as simple and natural as walking could be.
How she could succeed to stay on her feet after all the things she had went through was still a mystery for her.
"Do you need help ? He asked her, ironic, with a mocking tone.
She looked at him with a rage which was less and less contained.
- Your help, you can put it where you want, she whispered with hostility.
Yes, to be with the Lost One, even if it didn't happen often had, well… made her vocabulary and her way to talk be different from before.
- Oh, but you don't need to be that aggressive !
- Oh, really, Peter ? Did I put you lately in a cage of which I then lost the key ? NO ! So, shut up, please ?
- Alright. By the way, what I need to do doesn't need words, so, I can shut up if you want me to."
There was enough and not enough clues at the same time in his words, so Wendy could not understand what he meant, but it was enough to scare her.
To ask him questions would have been useless, and again, she couldn't escape from him.
The young girl realized then bitterly that she was trapped there, and that what she had always wanted was now turning into a true nightmare.
The young man's smile became soft and reassuring, but it didn't make Wendy forget which monster was hiding behind the smile of the angel, and he gave her his hand.
She would have wanted to put him away from her, with all her forces, but she was hungry, thirsty, she needed to sleep, she needed to wash.
And she knew that if she did this again, he would maybe let her die here, and she didn't want to, because a part of her still wanted to live, for her parents, for her brothers, and Baelfire.
(Thanks God, she hadn't forgot them yet.)
Exhausted and almost falling, she took his hand with disgust, admitting with difficulty that he was the only one who could save her, him who made everything to make her fall, and who was certainly not going to stop.
With fear in her heart, she followed him until the tree of the Lost One, now empty, and asking herself with terror what he was going to do to her.
To be continued…