Author's Note: While I work on the next chapters of Last Year of Innocence and The Rightful Heir, I give you a short little insight into Lady Mary and Mr. Carson. Since S4 starts up about six months after Matthew's death, I suspect that we will not be treated to anything like this. Consider it a missing scene playing out in my head that I wanted to share with you. **Tissue alert.**

I would also like to apologize for not responding to reviews and comments. Always know that I absolutely adore you for taking the time to share your thoughts. The reason/excuse, I hope, is a valid one. I got married on July 21st (who says you can't plan a wedding in six weeks?!) As you can imagine, I've had a lot of "stuff" on my mind because of that. LOL. And no... it was not a shotgun wedding (or a rocket wedding for that matter!)

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Summary: - S3 Christmas Special Spoiler Alert - He was the last to come and see her. Dr. Clarkson almost turned him away, but as he noticed the look on Lady Mary's visitor's face, the Crawley family doctor simply nodded and showed him to Lady Mary's room.

Carson's thoughts and observations of Lady Mary and Baby Crawley during the days and weeks following Matthew's passing.

Rating: K

Special Note & Thanks: A huge thank you to my super talented beta, R. Grace, for proofing this story!

Pairing: Charles Carson/Lady Mary Crawley/George Crawley/Sybil Branson

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Her Trusted Champion

Part I – A Visitor

He was the last to come and see her. Dr. Clarkson almost turned him away, but as he noticed the look on Lady Mary's visitor's face, the Crawley family doctor simply nodded and showed him to Lady Mary's room.

Lord and Lady Grantham had reluctantly left their grieving eldest daughter only moments earlier. Robert had practically had to physically carry his wife out of the room, as she did not want to leave Mary's side. It was only Mary's gentle request that she was tired and wanted to sleep that finally convinced the countess that they should indeed leave.

He stood for a moment by the door, just watching her. She looked so small in the bed, her face far from relaxed as she rested. Even though her eyes were closed, he could tell that she was not sleeping. Taking a tentative step into the room, he watched Mary's face for any sign of that she knew that she had company. A tiny sigh escaped her pale lips.

"Carson."

"I'm right here, my lady."

Her eyes fluttered open and he almost took a step back at the sadness in them. He stepped closer and she held out her hands to him. They felt cold and so small in his larger, warm ones. He automatically rubbed his thumbs over the back of her hands as if to stroke some warmth into them.

"You know…"

"I do."

Her eyes closed again, and her grip on his hands tightened. As painful as it was, he cherished that there was still some strength left in her. An insistent tug made him take a step closer.

"Please sit, Carson."

"But, my lady…" He couldn't just sit down on her bed.

"Sit." This time her voice held some sharpness to it. He instantly sat down, carefully balancing on the edge. Her eyes opened again and she leaned forward. "Oh, Carson, what am I to do?"

He let out a heavy sigh as her slender arms wrapped around his neck. Holding her in a gentle embrace, slowly stroking her back, Carson hummed an old tune that he used to sing to her when she was little. He had no answers for her. Of course she would get through this. She always did, never having been one to be down for long. But to tell her that now would only hurt her. Right now she did not want to get through it. Lady Mary was not ready to let go of Matthew Crawley. Carson knew it. She knew it.

"I cannot answer that, my lady," he said very softly. "All I can tell you is that you are surrounded by people who love you, and support you."

"I know." Her whispered answer broke into a tiny sob. "It just hurts so much."

"I know it does." He fell silent again, still slowly stroking her back. Mary rested her head on his shoulder and he started to hum that same tune again.

"I hope you will sing it to him too."

Carson opened his mouth to ask who 'he' was, when it came to him – her son. He had not even seen the boy, the new heir.

"If you allow me to, I most certainly will."

"I remember you singing it when I was little. It always made me feel safe." She pulled back and looked the old butler in the eyes. "You've always been so good to me, Carson. My true champion over the years."

"Always, my lady."

"Why is that?"

He chuckled, remembering a similar conversation years ago. "A certain young lady found her way into my heart many years ago, and she has not left, and I daresay that she never will."

She pressed her lips against his cheek. "Thank you. And please know that the feeling is mutual. You may work for my father, but to me, you're family."

"I'm honored, my lady."

"Have you seen him yet?"

He shook his head. "I came to see you first. You needed me more."

She nodded and covered her mouth as tears surfaced again. "I don't know how to do it on my own, Carson." Tears rolled down her cheeks and he gently wiped them away. "How can I be both mother and father? What if I'm a failure? What will I tell him, when he asks about his father?"

"One thing at the time, my lady. Right now he's just a little babe, and he needs your love and care more than anything. If you give him your love, unconditionally, he will feel it and draw strength from it."

She nodded, and met his eyes, knowing that his words held a double meaning. A gentle knock on the door made her look up. The nurse was standing there with the baby.

"Your son is awake, milady. I thought that perhaps you and your visitor wanted to see him."

Mary held out her arms to take the baby. "Come here, my sweetest little darling."

The baby moved in the blanket as Mary settled him against her. She looked up at Carson.

"Meet my son, Carson."

Carson gently touched the blanket, pulling it away a little so he could see the child better. The baby looked up at him with eyes so much like his mother's. His little arm waved in the air before it settled on Carson's hand, tiny fingers curling around the old butler's little finger. Mary laughed and stroked the boy's cheek.

"You're right, my darling. Carson is someone you can hold on to."

"He is a handsome little chap, my lady. He looks a lot like you."

"Isn't he? I don't mind if he looks like me, as long as he will have Matthew's wonderful personality."

"I can't wait to get to know him." Carson stroked the tiny hand and then placed it back on the baby's chest. "We're ready for you, both of you." He watched as the boy's eyes closed and he made a little smacking noise. "Mrs. Hughes put the crib in your bedroom."

Mary took his hand and squeezed it in a silent thank you. "I know it's not how things are done, but I need him close."

"Believe me, my lady, we all understand."

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To be continued in PART II – Returning to Downton Abbey