Read & Review
Disclaimer: Do not own Mcfly.
We have been friends for a long time right, we tell each other everything, and help each other when we are in trouble. But I can't seem to bring myself to tell you what's bothering me now. You've been staring at me for awhile now, and still don't know the effects that you cause me.
"mate, you alright?" You ask in your thick Bolton accent.
I don't answer you, I look away. You get up and walk away. My heart skips a beat because I realize that you now are right in my face with concern in your eyes.
"Tom, mate, you alright?" You ask again.
I don't answer, and I push you away and get up and run upstairs.
If only I could tell you how to I feel, and in some magical way you feel the same way, but it's always going to be if only.
You pushed me away, you never push me away.
If only you knew that I love you, and how much that hurt.
It takes me awhile but I find the coruage to go upatairs. I'm at your door. I knock, you don't tell me to come in, something must be really wrong. that makes me want to know even more, and every second I don't know my heart breaks. I knock again, this time you answer.
"Come in."
I walk in and see your face down in the pillow.
"Tom, what's bothering you? You know that you can tell me anything." I state.
You mumble something, but it's to soft for me to hear. So I ask again, but this time I use your full name.
"Thomas Micheal Fletcher, What's wrong?"
Still no answer.
"Tom, please tell me what's wrong." I plead.
The first time you ask you sound sincre, the second time you ask you sound demanding. Now you sound like you are about to cry, because i'm not going to tell you what's wrong. Which breaks my heart. But it still doesn't make me want to tell you the truth.
"Tom, what's wrong?" You whisper.
Now you sound like you are crying, am I hurting you that much by not telling you? I ready myself to tell you the truth, but the thought of 'If Only' pops into my head.
"I'm fine, just a little tired." I say with out looking at you because I know that you will catch me in my lie, if you look me in the eyes.
Tom, you think that lie is going to get rid of me. I know you to well to know that you are not tired. Even if you were it wouldn't make you sad.
You're not fine."
"Yes, I am." You say.
Your voice gave you away again.
"Look at me." I demand.
You don't make an attemp, so I leave. If you want to be alone, then I'll give you your time. But in the mean time, I'm going to find a way to tell you that I love you.
Dan you caught me in my lie, and you leave. Should I tell you? No, because that would ruin our friendship. I lay here for the next 20 minutes. I finally get the coruage to maybe tell you what's wrong. I go downstairs and find Harry and Dougie on the couch cuddling.
If only I had what they had.
"Where's Dan?" I ask as i sit in the chair beside the couch.
"He went out." Is all harry says.
I get up and walk out the door, your car is still in the drivewway, so I know that you didn't go that far. I walk down the street and round the corner, you're not there. Huh? When you're on your waalk abouts you usually don't go that far. So I go back to the house.
"Did you find him?" harry asks as I make my way upstairs.
"NO!" I scream as I slam my door shut.
If only I told you what was wrong this morning.
If only you felt the same.
If only I didn't have to feel this way.
If only, If only.
I'm sitting on a bench in front of the Thames river. I'm thinking about you and me being a couple.
If only we wer I'd be happy.
If only you felt the same.
If only I could handle all the remarks.
If only, If only.
~Later that evening~
I walk downstairs because dinner is ready. I go into the dinning room and see taht you're not there.
"Dan not back yet." I state as I take my seat at the table.
"No, he's here, he just took his food and went up stairs." Dougie answers.
"Oh." I say with a feeling of depression in my heart.
"Tom, is everything, okay?" Harry asks.
"No, Harry, it's not." I reply.
"Do you want to tell us about it?" Dougie asks.
I take a deep breathe and begin, "Well, do you know why Gio broke up with me?"
"Not really." Harry replies.
"Well she said that I talked about Danny to much, about how great he was and everything."
"Tom, when you were dating Gio, you did talk about Dan more then you talked about her." Dougie states.
"Really?"
"Yeah, but since the break up, you haven't been talking about Dan as much. You've also been down inn the dumps." Dougie answers.
"The reason I talked about Dan so much is because, well, uhm, erhm, I uhm, think I, uh, have feeling, uhm, for him."
"Why do you feel sad?" Dougie asks.
"Because, I know that he doesn't feel the same, and he has Georgia."
"Danny didn't tell you." Harry states.
"Tell me what?" I ask.
"Georgia broke up with him a week ago." Dougie replies.
I get up and put my plate in the sink. Now I'm headed to your bedroom.
It's 7:30pm and I haven't seen your face or heard your voice in 4 hours, and it's killing me. I hear a knock at the door.
"Dan, can I come in?" You ask.
My heart starts beating fast, beccause that's what happens when I hear your voice.
"Yeah."
You walk in and I see that your eyes are red and puffy, I turn my back to you because it breaks my heart to see that I hurt you in some way.
"Dan, we need to talk." You say as you sit on the end of my bed.
"About?" I ask muffled by my pillow.
"Us." You say.
My heart skips a beat, did I hear you right? Did you say 'US'?
"What about Us?" I ask as I sit up and look at you.
"Dan, I love you."
"I love you too."
You press your lips to mine.
If only I've told you sooner.
If Only
Fin