Prologue
As she stepped through the doorway, Susan felt as though she were drowning. She had heard once, long ago, that a drowning person saw their whole life flash before them – their whole existence reduced to as many snapshots as could fit into their final seconds of their life – in that step from one world to another Susan saw her life flash before her eyes, almost as if it were someone else's life.
She saw their lives in war-torn London – Susan had always been content with her life, but never satisfied.
She saw how powerless she had felt against the constant air-raids, and how capable she had felt with her bow in hand against the enemies of Narnia.
She saw how sad she had felt when Father had to leave, but secretly relieved that it wasn't Mother who had too, Mother whom she had always felt closest to.
She saw how just being in Narnia had made her feel whole and complete, for the first time in her life.
She saw how distraught she had been after they came back through the wardrobe.
Susan even saw how she had always been slightly jealous of Lucy, with her constant happiness, her innocence, and even her bravery.
Time stopped. My face was frozen in a gasp of horror, my hand still reaching for an arrow. As I watched, the figures surrounding him drew back from his lifeless body. In that moment I realised.
I realised that everything I thought I knew was wrong. And I knew that I would give anything to save him.