Back in those days, I was part-god. Of course, it wasn't easy being part-god, and I sure would have given a lot for full god, but I was just happy the way I was. And no, I wasn't happy as in "really, fantastically, fabulously happy". In the past, there were many part-gods. Mostly we were young men with too much imagination. I say subconscious though, because if we were truly conscious of it we wouldn't know what to do. Most likely we would have ventured into those random whorehouses you see in crooked streets, places where we might otherwise had remained for a long, long time. Too, there were women who had our talent, if being talented is truly what you call it. My guess is that women have less promiscuity than men, so that chances for a female Maker are much smaller. But for those who did, their rare artistry influenced women folk on the same reverent height as queens and princesses and baronesses; that is, they made all those woman folk feel lucky again, despite their own repulsiveness.
Anyway, let me say how it all started.
It began on the day I realized people's lives, I mean they real lives, these begin on dates that make'em jump. My date began on a sun-day. That day was the day I met Blessy. Now Blessy, she ain't a tall girl, and she ain't too short, either. She and her family came by and by last year looking for work and Missus's Barnesville took her in cause her family was too poor to support even the bigger ones. It was a good thing too, cause her family left the day before. Seemed they just dropped her off just for the sake of dropping daughters off. Now here's the deal; Missus's Barnesville? She's married to the local bishop or priest or whatever. So as far as I see it, Blessy's got a good home.
But I never did paid much attention to Blessy's undergarments, and certainly not when she bade me to look. The reason? Well, my momma says things like: I being always late. Late for everything, late for schoolwork, for piano lessons, even for talking. My mother told me I hadn't uttered my first word until I was almost 16 seasons old. I didn't know how old I was until I knew what 16 seasons were, and that was long time. And as for time and maturin', when it came by and by to start looking at everyone's underpants, I didn't know the reason for it and surely no one told me why. My mother's guess is that I came from one of those temple children. Slow folk, my mother called them, children that never really grew out of whatever they parents gave them.
Now, don't get me wrong. My mother is a witch. She leaps from sky to sky during nights when the moon is dark so you can't see. Sometimes I hear things from the back corner of my house. No doubt about it, if she's not a witch, then Blessy's no girl. Now I don't know why she's a witch but my guess is that something bad must of happened to her.
One time, she sat me down and looked me straight in the eye, and you know what she said? She said that she had been a bad girl all her life. She said she went to a priest and the priest told her she was cured of all her sins, and he blessed her and told her she was blessed many times. Then he kissed her and hugged her tightly. After that last phrase my momma wouldn't talk no more. When I asked why she couldn't talk no more, she told me I was too slow. I don't know why. Then my momma told me I was lucky I was slow because I wouldn't touch people. That was a little bit ironic considering how she had men over day by day.
I never did know who my father was nor did I find out how I got into those rich schools, but I was grateful. That's where I met Blessy. And Blessy, she was always my friend, she said she liked me and I guess I liked her, too. So one day, Blessy and me got walking along in the woods. This was just after the day Mr. Stitch screamed at Blessy for touching me too hard. He told me, "Best be careful Hub, best be careful because dumb chillen' like you start to multiply before they even begin to add." I didn't know what he meant because I could add one and twos, but not threes cause threes are hard.
So as I was saying, we were walking along just peacefully when she started grabbing me all hard again. At first, I thought it was a bear or something but she was just telling me to follow her into the woods. There, she told me to take my clothes off.
"That's dumb." I said. "It ain't so hot."
Well, she did it to herself anyways. When I still didn't budge she pulled me over and wrapped herself around me after she had already taken off my pants, somehow. Then she told me I should wedge myself between her and said it was natural. I tried. Then she started making animal sounds. She just ended up screaming for no reason at all. She said something about me being soft as jelly, except even softer. Eventually, she quit. She said she'd find someone else or just do it herself. Afterwards I was really afraid she'd also quit being my friend. That turned wrong, because in the end she just came up to me and said I was a big strong lord. She also said I was good because I never pushed my girls around like all the other lords.
We arrived to school all late. Mr. Stitch, he took one look at me and pointed a finger back and forth from me to Blessy. When he arrived back at me and stared into my eyes, he calmed down even despite all the ruckus from the other children, he said that despite the leaves in our clothe, and despite us being late, and went on to despite this and that, he didn't think we did anything bad. Blessy he gave her a real bad whipping, but for me he didn't do anything. I don't know why, Mr. Stitch said I never did anything new and that was good.
Turned out, I did learn a little from school that year. I learned that us Lordic people lived west of sivilization, west of this place called Cyrodil – which is supposed to be our boss whenever there was any important decisions to make. Blessy she didn't know no how, so she just got up one day and said there was no anybody in Cyrodil that could be us Lords. The children cheered but Mr. Stitch got mad at her.
On the way back Blessy was really mad. She had a puffy face with lots of red on her cheeks. She wasn't happy at all. Sure I let her hug me. I didn't want her to keep crying like that. No, no.
I learned why she was so upset around the time people like Mr. Stich were rounded up and sent sprawling down Rawling Street with nothing but bear pelts. I asked why. Blessy said they were trade-marks of our land, meant to be jokes because that's what Cyrodil wanted so much. I didn't see what was so interesting about the whole lot, but apparently Blessy cried and said how so many bad things were happening to us Lords. How we were just venting out our anger at normal people like Mr. Stitch even though he whipped us a good lot. She then stopped crying and looked at Mr. Stitch, standing with his thingy dangling. She then screamed at being robbed so much. "Money?" I said. She kept crying and laughing meanwhile I didn't know whether to hug her or not. Usually my hugging stopped her crying.
"Yes." She said eventually, "Mr. Stitch is gonna be taken to the sea, where just his head is going to be shipped off, along with all the bearskin we can deliver. For robbing us." That was it for Mr. Stitch. I never saw him no more.
For a while things got calm again. We got ourselves a new teacher. The new teacher he was much nicer to us. He didn't hurt us much. Blessy said he let everyone talk their feelings out.
One day, me and Blessy walked down Rawling Street and heard a lot of stumping. We were plumb surprised.
"Quick! We'll hide in the church. Father will protect us!"
I followed her. When we were well hidden, I heard lots of stomping outside. It never came in and I was glad. I asked Blessy why and she just said it was so. I heard a bunch of metal clinking this way and that. We waited for three days until all the loudness stopped. When we came out, Lordidom was swept with tin cans with men hiding in them. I didn't bother to ask.
The new teacher, Mr. Linch, got Lynched. My mother, I never saw her no more. A third teach came by and by, this time his name was Mr. Folk. Word got around in school that Mr. Folk's real name is Mr. Fuck. There were less kids in school of course, but word still go around pretty fast. Pretty soon we were calling him Mr. Fuck whenever we thought he couldn't learn who. Blessy, she did something real bad. She said, go fuck yourself when Mr. Fuck – I mean Folk – told her to clean. This time Blessy got a real beating real bad. He pushed her into a room and did things to her. The doors were locked but we heard it, we heard it bad. I thought it was normal at first but it wasn't. I got up and tried to break the door but by that time it was all over. I was by her side the whole time after (but not before) while she mumbled and caught brain fever and saw things and said it was hurt to pee now that Mr. Folk had been through with her. Seeing how he was a man from Cyrodil, us leftover children said it was Mr. Stitch's way of revenging on us.
Things got peaceful, again. The tin cans were messy the way they did us in. Two of them eventually wondered in our church. The smaller one looked at me once and said something I didn't hear. He then hit me a couple of times. I didn't know what to do but I was afraid he might hit me again so I budged. It wasn't good at all, so he pulled out his long knife. Blessy screamed, "Stop! He's dumb and stupid!"
They looked at Blessy and me and Blessy and back to me. They told me to go outside and since it was a windy day they told me to pee into the wind. When I came back soaked, they just laughed and laughed. Afterwards they left.
Things got peaceful a third time. But once again the tin cans got mad, they got mad because they say we Lords were throwing things at them and some of us even slit their throats when they slept. They took Blessy's dad because they said he was helping stir another rebellion.
So it got quiet again. But again, they came back. This time the small one pointed the knife towards me and told me not to move. The big one, he was the real devil. He said that if she, I mean Blessy, didn't touch him right away, they'd do something real bad. When she spit, he laughed and got angry at the same time. He said if she didn't wrap, he'd kill me. That made her cry so much that she let him touch her the same way she touched me in the woods. Well at that point I suddenly got this burning feeling. I just let it out. I took the sword, didn't even get time to be amazed at how easy it was to put it inside the small tin can's stomach. Then I ran towards the other MAN. I banged his head against the wall fifty times until he couldn't use it no more. By then red things were on me just like Blessy's face after that time at school.
Blessy was quiet all this time, too. She never said a word while I was banging. Then she wrapped herself around me and tight. "You're so strong, Hub! I knew you'd save me one day."
We went around searching through all the red stuff for gold coins. We found some, but they weren't a lot. She said they were probably gonna rape her before they would kill us and take everything in the church. When we left, we left the church be as it always was.
Far we never got. Pretty soon many tin cans were surrounding us. Blessy raised up the something she found in the dad man's pants. The big man looked at it and almost laughed if he weren't already so angry. Then another big man came and looked took one look at me and Blessy and knew what had happened. He told the tin cans that they could do Blessy anyway they want. Me, they'd do something special for me.
So we was separated, Blessy and I. I was thrown around despite being bigger than all three of them. I was taken to the woods where one man got behind my back and said something religious like "God let you rest." Or something like that.