warnings: feels bro (idk maybe) r&r guys!
Her chest heaved slowly, taking in small breaths and releasing it in her sleep as she was curled on her side, hands tucked with a contented look on her face as if she was a child dreaming of rainbows and unicorns in an escape from reality.
But alas, she wasn't.
She was no child, she wasn't living in a fairytale, and she knew that. But he wished she did.
He sat next to her on the bed as he absentmindedly reached out to play with her auburn hair that reminded him of autumn as one of her braids tangled unto his fingers. His honey glazed eyes traced the freckles on her alabaster skin, sprinkled as he mapped each as he memorized her features one by one. Button nose, eyes shut in a close, thin lips puffy from her lip bites whenever she was nervous was parted ever so slightly as she took in another breath.
Nonetheless how many times he's watched her in her sleep, he knew he'd never get tired of watching her, drinking in all her beauty.
His lips inched into a smile at the thought of it.
The flowers he held in his other hand had caught him in a strong aroma of something very floral, even in such a dull room she didn't like. He knew she loved them, it was her escape from the fact that she was enclosed in a place she never liked at all. It lit her little world up, and he knew she loved them.
She was held captive in a place she never wanted, dull cream-colored walls, an annoying beeping machine that indicated she was still alive, plastered breathing material on her nose, plastic sticking in her veins, all that she believed that was hell.
How did it end like this?
He remembers her giving him her smiles during the toughest of times, he remembers her giving him warm hugs in winter, dancing in the summer, watching seasons change in the autumn, and the kisses she's given him without permission in the first bloom of spring.
Happy. That's what they were. That's what they are.
Or so he believes.
She shifts her weight on the bed making him jerk his head back to reality—snapping out of his thoughts.
Her long lashes flutter as her eyes crack open now fully aware of the presence of the person sitting next to her in bed. And when her eyes open, she sees his face twisted in worry—as he always is ever since he knew of her disease. Her lips curve into a reassuring smile.
"Hi," she squeaked as she grazed her hand over the covers to find his freehand resting on the side of her bed. She takes his calloused hands in her small ones, intertwining them together.
"Hey," his chest flutters warmly in seeing her finally awake in her sleep. He fiddles with her fingers as he looked down at their hands that danced above the covers of her bed. She was so small, petite—strong, but… fragile. It worried him that he would break her by just touching her but he was cautious and very aware to not break the flower, destroy all the innocence that she is.
"Are those for me?" she asked though she knew the answer was obvious. He glanced at the bouquet of flowers he held in his other hand, before turning back to smile at her as his eyes softened.
"Of course," he released her hand for a moment to put the flowers on the table beside her bed. She squirmed, slightly, to the feeling of emptiness that he let go of her hand. But he immediately took her hand in both hands again as he played with her electric blue colored nails, her slim fingers, her knuckles. He grazes his thumb over her hand.
"So, doing better?" he broke the silence that lingered in the room. Her eyes were locked on him playing with her hands.
"Yeah, I guess." She replied so fast. So casually. His head immediately turned towards her as his blonde hair fell over his face that tickled sensitive skin.
He stared at her for a moment, eyes fixed at her. Usually when he asked how she was doing, she'd start up with a story, or report to him how she's feeling, but this time it wasn't. She never said she was okay. She always found a way to dodge that question, find another. He knew she was never okay, but he never pushed her to the limit to tell him what she truly felt. He wanted her to talk, laugh, make everything seem like it's okay. Because he couldn't bear to see her… cry again.
But maybe that was his mistake.
Her hand involuntarily clutched at her sheets, lips curving into a forced smile, eyebrows knitting up nervously as she but her lips. She. Bit. Her. Lip.
He knew something was up.
"What's… wrong?" his voice broke out as he grasped her hands a little tighter. He was breathing through his mouth now as he eyed her, skeptical of what she was saying.
"Nothing!" she chirped a little too enthusiastically. "I-I mean everything's fine, my blood pressure is down, my chest doesn't twist anymore, I don't—" she rambled on as she tucked a stray hair behind her ear as she looked up at him to find that he wasn't buying her story. "—I'm fine."
She suddenly finished as she swallowed the lump in her throat, biting her lip nervously as her shoulders shook, the world falling down on the two of them. She shook her head as her fingers twitched to the feeling that tears were stinging her eyes now.
Hold it back… hold it back… hold it—
Her eyes erupted in a dam of tears, one trickling down after another as she gasped for breath in the midst of her phantom agony as her sobs broke the silence that bounced back and forth in the mundane colors of the hospital room.
Shit.
Her shoulders shook as she broke down as she reached her freehand over her face to wipe away the wretched tears that showed her of her vulnerable side, the weakness, her fault. Something people would use against her.
"I'm fine," she reassured though she had already broken into a million pieces, drowning in her own tears as her cheeks flushed. "I'm okay."
She repeated.
Why is he so quiet? Oh my god no he thinks I'm…
"I-I'm oo—" her boyfriend suddenly yanked at her hand that he held unto earlier.
"No," he said against her ear, breath ragged and slow. He threw his hands around her and wrapped her in a securing hug, his body heat radiating unto hers as he stroked her bed hair. Her head rested atop his broad, shaking shoulders as he buried his face into the crook of her neck. She was wrapped in him, all that he is. Sandwiched by his warm body that kept her close. "No, you're not."
Her vision was clouded by her tears, holding the twist in her chest and the burst of sudden tears as she bit her lip.
"Kristoff," her voice came hoarse, he slightly relaxed to the calling of his name. Still, he was shaking just like her now. "You should be in LA now, you should be playing for The Weasels, you should be crushing the Green Chameleons by now," her eyes closed as she imagined him skating in an ice rink and thrusting his arms up in victory. "—you should be winning a-and your dream your—"
"I don't give a fuck," his voice caught in his throat as a tear threatened to trickle down his eyes as he shook his head while still holding her close. "I don't give a damn about it, Anna. I just want to be here… with you."
"Are you mad?!" she pulled away to face him, her azure eyes marking dreaded pain and regret, and as the moonlight shone into the crevices of the room and onto her face, he couldn't deny that even in her fury… she was beautiful. "This was your dream, Kristoff. I-I remember back at your shop you told me it meant the world to you, everything!" her voice hitched as she drew both of her hands atop her head, and tugged at her hair… hard. "I'm fucking fine you didn't have to throw it all away you didn't have to give it all up just because of ME!"
She screeched as she shot him a look of disbelief before melting into agony once more.
"I, I swear I'm—" she glanced back up, voice shaking, heart thundering, breaking, falling, falling and… as she saw that his boyfriend was staring at her with the most calm face as he knit his eyebrows up in worry, but his eyes marked… pain as well. She wasn't the only one who suffered. How could she be so selfish?
"I'm fine."
Her tears rolled down her tinted cheeks as her eyes swelled, her nose pink from desperate breaths as her chest heaved, her shoulders shook as she knew she was such a wreck in that moment she just wanted to jump out of bed and runaway because she couldn't look her boyfriend in the eyes and he just—
He drew her close again for another hug, but this time he was gentle, slow, like he always is even in his rough physique. He rested his chin atop her head as she continued to cry into his chest, both hands against his chest and fisting his shirt in her anger, her weakness, her—she was a blizzard.
He knew she was eternal summer, the smiles, warm hugs, her kindness, the happiness she shared along others but this time—she was a blizzard. A raging storm, and all she could do was melt in his arms, calming her.
"I just want to stop being a burden," she admitted as her voice cracked in her sobs, digging her face into his dampened chest.
"You're not a burden," he kissed atop her head as his chapped lips planted in soft skin, worrying that the plastic attached to her wrist would accidentally get removed as she wriggled in his arms. "You're not a burden, don't say that."
His eyes darted around the room filled with dusk, they were just two people… finding a safe haven within each others arms. He pulled away slightly as he took her chin his thumb and tilted her head up to meet his gaze. She stopped crying for a moment as she got lost in the stars in his eyes.
"It was my choice that I didn't board the flight to LA, it was my choice that I don't open the shop 24/7 anymore, it's my choice to come here and stay. Because…" he cupped her cheeks and wiped away dried tears that stained her face. "…I love you. Remember that."
She could feel her stomach twist into knots as she swore her heart was going to jump out of her chest as she choked on her own words. Of all the people, she was pushing away the only person that never shut her out.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I—"
He cut her midsentence as he smashed his lips unto hers. Her lips were wet and warm, his was chapped and needy. Caught in the heat, he pulled her deeper into the kiss as one hand planted on her waists and the other at the back of her head. Both of her arms wrapped along his neck, clinging onto him for dear life.
They pulled away, gasping.
He hugs her again before whispering a confession she was surprised to hear that immediately made her cheeks flush.
"I've fallen for your broken, beautiful soul."
im sorry for mistakes (if there are any) and im not good in dramatic stuff soo.. sorry about that. and yeah anna has a heart disease, idk what it is tho XD i didnt elaborate what it is since it's just a one-shot
this is kinda going to be a chap on my kristanna fic (maybe): A heart worth mining
don't forget to check it out! and reviews are greatly appreciated~