Pure Ambition

Disclaimer -- Morgan is mine. Lucius is not. He belongs to an enormous conspiracy of sadistic adults who like to torture adolescents by forcing them to write disclaimers. The conspiracy calls itself "J.K. Rowling."

Author's Note -- I have a sort of love/hate relationship with Lucius Malfoy, and this was intended as a character study. I like doing just dialogue sometimes. Please review.

"This whole thing is very unfortunate, really. Now am in the regrettable position of beating the living daylights out of four Gryffindor first years. And, much as they honestly deserve it, it infringes upon my honor to administer a beating to creatures so much smaller and weaker."

"Honor? You have honor?"

"Oh, quiet. You're next on the list."

"No, I'm not. So, back to our previous discussion ..."

"We don't have discussions, Morgan."

"You're right, we have mutual sessions of threats, debate, and soliloquizing. Back to our discussion?"

"Certainly. What was it?"

"Our latest party ice-breaker, which, of course, we shall never use at a party. What are the real exemplary qualities of a Slytherin?"

"So, we have ambition and intelligence."

"I'm not sure I agree. Look at that Vortigern Crabbe person ..."

"He possesses a sort of low animal cunning. Besides, he's an abberation."

"Good word. And you wonder why people don't understand you."

"Come now, Morgan, you're far worse."

"I'm sure I lack the faintest estimate of what you are currently discoursing on."

"Oh, stop. Point is."

"Yes, I see your point. Crabbe is an idiot, and on this we all agree. Most of us are smarter than that, and on this we also all agree. So Slytherin House demands at least some sort of cunning, even if it only shows itself as ambition."

"Fair enough. What else? Ruthlessness, I suppose."

"Definitely. But that also fits under ambition."

"Then the criterion is firm ambition, enough ambition to push other things aside."

"Yes. Cruelty I shouldn't think is necessary, though it is certainly helpful at times. And ... hmm ... we tend to show a twisted sort of loyalty, don't we? As long as it never steps in the way of our ambition."

"What you're saying, is that we have many of the admirable qualities of other Houses, but just when it's convenient."

"Precisely. Game of chess?"

"Lord, no. I'm so sick of chess. I dream of marching chessmen."

"So tell me about this delightful appointment with your Gryffindor first years."

"They're not 'my' anythings. They just happen to lack proper respect for older students."

"Ah. Upstarts. How amusing."

"So, there will be a severe beating for them."

"Are we thinking about the same first years?"

"Probably, they've reached infamy already, mainly for insulting people."

"And you intend to take them all singlehandedly?"

"No, you're helping me."

"Ah. I see."

"Besides, I won't give bruises to all of them. One of them is my fiancee's cousin, might not go over well with the in-laws. I'll probably teach them all a lesson on the small one."

"The fat, mousy one?"

"The tiny, twitchy one who carries books everwhere with him."

"Why him?"

"They're protective of that one. He's the weak member of their foul little pack. Weak and noble, bad combination. The chubby one, now, he knows how to stay out of trouble. He ought to have been a Slytherin, I tell you. That damned hat lost its mind briefly."

"Briefly?"

"Good point. Really, though. Tell me about animal cunning."

"All first years are a bit ... feral, Lucius."

"No, he's more barnacle-like – anchors himself to a pillar and sticks there."

"Reliable psychoanalysis straight from the Slytherin common room."

"Stop it, Morgan. So, you coming along to help me hold him down?"

"You know how I look forward to it."

Terminus Quod Orsa