Just a quick oneshot from a while ago I've decided I won't go much further on.


Gintoki had his days.

Bad days, to be more specific.

Thankfully, they came few and far between, warded off by the company he kept and the craziness Kabuki-cho had to offer.

But at night, alone in his room, chasing blissful sleep sometimes left him instead chasing after a light he knew would be snuffed when he caught up to it. Pools of darkness became cruel red. The noises of the night transformed into the cries of war.

He hadn't slept well in the last few days, what with death haunting his dreams. Well practiced in the art of lies and subject-changing, he was able to ward off the questioning of his employees on this particular day. They took off for their own duties, either to a certain pop idol or shogun's sister, leaving Gintoki to kill time and avoid the memories by completing a minor manual labor job.

Jobs, of course, had their way of going awry. It just seemed to be his curse.

It had been something in the contents of the box that had split open when he tripped. He didn't bother trying to remember what in particular had started it. Forgotten details would keep it from happening again if he happened to go back over the events later.

Whatever it was, it sent him back into the battlefield, surrounded by corpses and blood and the stench of rot. It filled his ears with the sounds of his sword slicing through flesh and bone, of screams and cries.

He retched, and took off running.

He didn't hear the shouts from behind him.

Awareness came back to him he didn't know how long after. Customers stared as he stood in the doorway of Otose's bar. He didn't even know how he had gotten back to the building.

"Catherine, take over for a bit."

The woman's bewildered stare passed between the two.

He submitted meekly to the owner now leading him by the hand up to the second floor, to his own rented space. Otose said nothing as she sat him down on the couch. He watched vaguely interested as she poured him a glass of strawberry milk, only to pause mid-way through and return it to the carton. The glass came to him full of water instead.

It must have shown on his face when the color suddenly reminded him of blood.

"Drink."

He did, slowly. He was in a numb place at the moment, recovering, but not yet free from the memories his mind had been returned to.

"You've been having nightmares again."

She said it so simply that he returned the statement with a nod just as simple, except suddenly things weren't as simple.

Nightmares. Why did she have to use the word?

Because she knew precisely what he needed, of course. It had happened before. Twice. The first time shortly after she had taken him in, after he carelessly run into one trigger, the second after carelessly doing the same damn thing.

His breath hitched, and then kept coming back to him sharply. His eyes stung. They stung too much and kept watering.

A head stared back at him behind his eyes as he shut them to ward off the tears.

Otose took hold of him when his eyes snapped back open, pulling his head to her shoulder as she had done once before and attempted the time before that, though back then he fought her kindness. He hesitated, because no matter how it helped he still could not bring himself to simply fall apart on her. Still, his hands found purchase on her sleeves, rending the poor fabric under his grip, until he felt something boiling over in his chest and he wasn't sure he was capable of holding it back any more.

"Let it out," she gently advised.

It broke.

He buried his face into her shoulder and screamed.

It seemed like the whole ordeal took hours. Otose's shoulder was a sopping mess. Gintoki was an exhausted one. She fussed over him in the way she had about fussing over people, making it look like she didn't care for all the world and yet being thorough and motherly all the same.

"…Thanks, Granny."

"You can thank me by paying to clean this," she said, gesturing to her shoulder.

"Ah…shoot. I forgot to get paid."

"You free-loading idiot perm-head."

They sat in silence for a few moments before she finally stood.

"So what do you want me to say to Catherine? She happened to notice you were more of a mess than usual."

"Make something up. I ate something terrible. Tore my rectum taking a massive dump. Something appropriately stupid."

Otose barked out a laugh that allowed him to smile.

"Appropriately stupid then," she agreed, and casually walked away.

About five minutes later, he heard roaring laugher from the bar below him, and immediately regretted giving the older woman a pass to make something up. He was certain the cat lady wouldn't let him live it down for at least a week.

Gintoki groaned. He had his days.