A/N: I was supposed to type something else entirely but this story-idea came and snatched me entirely. (smirks sheepishly) Thus, here comes my second 'M:I' outing. Yay?
WARNINGS: CHILD ABUSE, mentions of drug use, language, adult themes… Hey, DO NOT stomp on each other on your way out! It's rude!
DISCLAIMER: MUAH-HAH-HAA! You SERIOUSLY wonder if I have enough money to hire Renner AND Cruise? NO, nope, absolutely no. Me owns nothing. Except for an over-active imagination…
Awkay, because I'm REALLY nervous about this… Let's go! I really hope that you'll enjoy the ride.
The Perfect Son
It was the magical calm between missions. Ethan's team was a little bruised and utterly exhausted, but for once no one had been critically injured. They'd even been lucky enough to avoid broken bones. Benji announced that they'd honor the special occasion with the biggest and unhealthiest pizzas they could get their hands on.
Yet somehow it was Ethan and Will who got sent to actually retrieve the food.
Ethan groaned, trying to comprehend the list of wished toppings Benji had scribbled hurriedly. There were six things, and he could actually guess two of them. "Is that 'chicken'? Or 'garlic'?"
Will shrugged. "You're the IMF super-agent", his friend pointed out without any malice. "If you can't figure it out no one can." A grin appeared while they entered the uncomfortably noisy pizzeria. "Order him anchovies. Maybe that'd teach him to write more clearly."
Ethan smirked. Then pocketed the useless list. "I like the way you think."
Just then Will's phone received a text. Ethan, still preoccupied by Benji's mystery list, didn't notice anything out of the ordinary at first. Until he saw from the corner of his eye how his friend blanched and shuddered, like getting shot. "Brandt?" When the other didn't respond he began to get really and genuinely… concerned. "What is it?"
Will shook his head. Once, twice, thrice. "Nothing. Just…" The man licked his lips. A nervous habit that only appeared when Will was facing something incredibly stressful or terrifying. "Bad news. From home."
Ethan's lips were already open but he never got the chance to ask. An overly perky female voice interrupted the moment. "Are you two ready to order?"
By the time the orders had been given Will's face held a stubbornly closed up expression, and the small chance at getting answers Ethan had was gone.
Whatever the text was about, Will composed himself remarkably well. So well, in fact, that the man managed to trick Benji and perhaps even Jane into imagining that nothing was wrong. Only Ethan noticed that his friend didn't manage to eat a single bite of pizza.
Once the others had fallen asleep, absolutely exhausted from the grueling mission, Ethan headed towards Will's room. Call it a hunch or a sixth sense, but he felt the need to check up on his friend. Maybe he'd even be able to convince the man that eating wasn't a bad idea. Ethan froze when he heard Will talking to a phone.
"… not coming." Will's tone was clipped and exasperated. Clearly it took a lot of willpower to not yell. That answer didn't please whoever his friend was talking to. "Because I'm not going to come and see that bastard just because he's decided that he doesn't want to die without the world seeing what a perfect, loving little family he's leaving behind!"
Ethan gritted his teeth, surprise and a couple of other things sending a shiver through him. He wanted to turn and walk away. He should've. This was something very private and he had no right to eavesdrop. But when he heard the pain and sorrow in his friend's voice…
"And when has he ever been a father to me?" Will's volume rose a couple of octaves, the man's voice chilling and heartbreaking all at once. "A father would've never…!" There was a pause while the other person bit back. "Oh, I know that you don't believe me. Because you still live in that fairytale world inside your head. I was kicked out of that world once and I'm not coming back to ease your guilty conscience."
Ethan stood absolutely still and waited. Nothing more was said, and in a few minutes he could be certain that the phone call was over. He tried to make himself walk away, reminded himself that Will most likely needed some time, space and privacy. Instead he took two more steps and peered into the room.
No lights were on but he saw Will's familiar silhouette sitting on the bed. Hair a mess, face buried into both hands. The man's whole frame kept shuddering and it was impossible to tell whether the cause was sobs or trembling. Perhaps a combination of both.
"You heard, huh?"
Will's voice succeeded in catching Ethan off guard. "Yeah", he admitted. There were several things he wanted to ask. Even if he knew that he probably wouldn't get a response. He swallowed them all. "I was about to ask you for a whiskey shot or two but maybe it's not a good idea." Ethan knew full well that Will didn't drink when upset. Ever.
"Probably not", Will agreed oddly quietly. No witty remarks. The man was still trembling.
How do you support someone who'd rather lose a limb than admit that they needed help and comfort? Ethan, for one, had absolutely no idea. "Maybe you should get some sleep. But, if you want to share…"
"G'night, Hunt." It was said with such finality that made all objections futile. And although the room's door was left open even a wall of bricks wouldn't have matched the barrier that rose around Will.
Walking away, Ethan heard something hit the wall and break.
The following morning it was easy to see that Will hadn't slept a wink. Benji and Jane cast worried glances towards the man but knew better than to comment. Which didn't keep them from cornering Ethan as soon as Will, pale and uncharacteristically quiet, had locked himself to a shower. "What's going on?" Jane demanded. Always the one who needed to tackle and handle problems.
"I don't know", Ethan admitted through his teeth. And in cases like this he hated not knowing. He didn't even consider telling the two about the phone call. Breaking Will's still fragile trust like that wasn't an option. "But I'll see if I can help." Impossible missions were his specialty, after all.
They all agreed that the less people were around, the more likely Will would open up. So Jane and Benji left, but not before making Ethan swear that he'd call if… Well. "And when he finally stops wasting all warm water and emerges from the shower, tell him that there's still pizza in the fridge", Benji added. "Only some of that shrimp one, though. His own fault for not eating yesterday. Tell him that he should eat more, too."
Ethan's eyebrow rose. Amongst all the worry there was also a flicker of amusement. "Why not tell him yourself?"
"Because you're the only one boneheaded enough to get through to him", Jane replied before Benji got the chance to. A careful, experienced ear caught the true emotions in her tone. And only a quick, experienced eye caught the worried glance she cast subtly towards the bathroom's direction.
For the first time in almost two full days Ethan felt the urge to smile, yet again proud of his team.
It took almost forty minutes until Will finally emerged from the shower. Ethan, who'd been typing a mission report early for once, listened to his friend's steps moving around the safe house. Will paced and paced, until finally settling to his own room.
After giving it a moment's thought Ethan decided to go and check up on his friend. Will was talking to a phone while zipping his go-bag. "… a couple of my vacation days? There's… a family emergency." Apparently that wasn't enough of an explanation. Will's jaw tightened to an extend that had to hurt. "My father is dying." Stunning, really, how well that tone hid the storm of emotions. But the man's stiff posture spoke the truth. "Yes, thank you. I will."
When the awkward conversation was over Ethan gave his friend a few moments to pull himself together. His gaze strayed towards the other's tightly balled fists. "You're going there, aren't you?"
Will didn't ask for a clarification. Instead the man nodded, not looking towards him. "We've all got some ghosts in our past. It's the IMF magic." The agent shrugged. "Maybe now I can get rid of a few."
"I'll give you a ride." Ethan went on at the stormy glare darted his way. "I've seen your file, I know where your parents live. It's a four-hour ride and you're already exhausted." And he was worried, even if he would've never admitted it. He needed to make sure that Will would be okay.
The most alarming thing of all was that Will showed no further resistance. His friend sighed heavily, looking like he was having a headache. Like there was a ton's weight on his shoulders. "Fine. Just… Don't say that I didn't warn you."
The long journey was terrifyingly quiet. Will insisted that he'd drive and focused intently on the road ahead, sunglasses covering his eyes. Ethan could only wonder what sort of monsters from the past were brought back to life in his friend's head.
They'd reached a hospital's parking lot until Will finally spoke more than the bare minimum. The man's hands squeezed the steering wheel so hard that knuckles turned white. "You should wait in the car."
Ethan shook his head. Because while he wasn't exactly the best with the… emotional stuff he could tell that his friend needed him. "I've come this far. Why not let me come along the whole way?"
Will emitted a bizarre, ragged and choked sound. "My mother, and my sister… They'll be there." The man's hands barely managed to hold the sunglasses that were slowly taken off. "You… You won't think of me the same way, after seeing them. And… I don't want that."
All of a sudden Ethan had a very bad feeling about this. But he wasn't going to let it show. "Try to trust me, Brandt." Was that a plea or a command? "Come what may… You'll still be the same to me. I promise."
Will nodded faintly, not even glancing his way.
Ethan frowned. He didn't like the expression on his friend's face or the way the man was trembling. "You don't have to do this", he pointed out.
Will shook his head. "Yeah, I do." The man breathed in so deep that it probably made him feel dizzy. "Let's just… Let's get this over with."
Neither felt like talking as they made their way towards the hospital's waiting room. Two women were already there, the younger of them holding a baby. Both were dressed expensively, their jewels shining in the fluorescent lights. Even their hair and makeup had been done to the perfection. Ethan had known that Will came from a rich family. He hadn't known just how rich.
The women played the part of a grieving family incredibly well. Until the moment Will walked in. The younger woman tensed up, her eyes narrowing. "The prodigal son returns."
The older woman stepped forward, a scolding expression on her pale face. "John, Elisabeth. This is a hospital, and your father needs us. Do not cause a scene." She was tense as she greeted her son with a nod. "Those horrible things you said on the phone… I forgive you."
Ethan frowned, processing. John? Oh yes, Will had been named after his father. John William Brandt Jr. He snapped out of his thoughts when his friend took a step forward. The man's back was to him but the stiff shoulders spoke clearly enough.
"You… forgive me?" Will's voice was pure venom. "All the bruises and broken bones he gave me… Then Willis… All those times you turned a blind eye… And you forgive me?"
Elisabeth stepped forward sharply, the baby in her arms jostling but not waking up. Her eyes flashed as she slapped Will, hard. He didn't even flinch, like he'd been expecting it. "I told her not to invite you here", she hissed. "I told her that you'd lie, again and again. Even now."
"Elisabeth!" the older woman gasped, scandalized.
Elisabeth gritted her teeth, glaring at her brother. "Get out of here. Right now!"
Will nodded. "I will", he promised. "The only reason I came here was to say goodbye, to all of you."
His mother shook her head. "John, don't!" she pleaded. Years, decades, too late reaching out for her son. "One day you'll have children, too, and I want to…"
"That is not going to happen." Will's voice was devoid of all emotion. Like he'd switched off a part of himself. "You tossed me away a long time ago. Now give me his room number and then let me stay gone."
Elisabeth wrinkled her nose and sighed, shaking her head. "Look at you. You're using again, aren't you?" Her eyes narrowed threateningly once more. "Remember the previous time you faced him when you were high? I'm not letting you anywhere near him when he's in that condition."
Ethan decided that he'd heard enough and stepped into view. Both women startled at the sight of him. The older recovered more quickly. "I, ah… I didn't expect John to have company." She fidgeted with apparent discomfort. "John, is… this man your… er…"
"Ethan is my friend", Will interrupted sharply. Then inhaled and exhaled. "Now, the room number. The faster we get rid of each other the better."
"A doctor is visiting him. That's why we're here. You can't…", Elisabeth tried, but snapped her mouth shut loudly at a look from her mother.
Will's mother gave him the number. She reached out a hand to grab his son's, then changed her mind. His sister remained silent, played her part although wrath still danced in her eyes. Will marched out of the room without looking back.
Once his friend was gone Ethan glared at both women. "Whatever he's gone through… You may not believe him but trust my word. It happened, and you made him go through it all alone. I'd want to be there when you finally realize it. For now I'm going to keep you as far away from him as possible." He was turning away when he nodded towards the baby. "And Elisabeth? If your son ever tells you that someone is hurting him… Remember the way your brother just looked at your mother. And believe him." With those words he headed to search for the room Will had been directed to.
Will stayed in the room for exactly ten minutes after Ethan got there. When the man emerged there was a unreadable expression on his face. Neither spoke as they left, eager to leave the building and the people inside it behind, and took off.
Ethan's head was spinning and fuming as he drove towards home. Trying desperately to comprehend everything he just found out. All those tiny hints making a sickening puzzle.
Will, on the other hand, remained shockingly calm. Kept his composure, didn't let himself crack. Until holding it all together became impossible.
"Ethan." The use of first name was a surprise. Will's tone of voice was alarming. The agent's face had gained a very unhealthy color. "Pull over. Now."
Wasting no time on pointless questions Ethan did just that, relieved that they were on a quiet road. Before the car had even come to a full halt Will bolted out, managed about three steps and threw up loudly. Despite the voice inside him that screamed at him to go and comfort his friend Ethan gave Will a few moments before following.
By the time he made it to the scene Will had slumped to sit on the ground. The man shuddered, waking up from deep thoughts, and nodded gratefully at the bottle of water offered to him. "Thanks."
Ethan nodded back. He didn't speak until the other had taken a few gulps. "Are you…?"
"Agatha Willis… She was a diplomat friend of father's", Will revealed quickly, hurriedly. If this wouldn't come out now it never would. The man was pointedly not looking at him. "I… I was only eight. I couldn't understand. I just… I knew that it felt wrong."
Ethan felt sick to his stomach. He swallowed and also sat down before finding his voice. "You told your parents."
"My mother. She started crying, said nothing." It was terrifying how little emotion could be seen on Will's face. The man was fighting with all his might to keep himself together. "That evening my father came to my room and hit me so hard that I saw stars. Not for the first time, or last. He told me to stop lying and destroying his career. So… I stopped trying. No one would've believed me, anyway. And… Well, a couple of years later Willis died in a car accident, and it didn't matter what she was doing to me."
Rage flowed through Ethan. Sharp and raw. "But it did." How did he manage to sound so calm?
"Of course it did." Will inhaled a ragged breath and wiped his eyes angrily although no tears were visible. The man pulled one leg to his chest, still looking away pointedly. "My parents… They were so used to that farce that they just played along. And my sister learned quickly. But… I refused to be the perfect son when every day I wanted to scream. So, when I was thirteen, I started getting into a trouble. Alcohol, drugs…" Will trailed off, clearly ashamed of himself. "When I was seventeen I was big and high enough to make father pay. I beat him until he needed hospital treatment. Elisabeth, I… I had no idea that she was home, until she started screaming." The man rubbed his face mercilessly with both hands, as though trying to get rid of the mental images. "Father finally had enough. He claimed that he'd been mugged by strangers and kicked me out. To an expensive boarding school as far away from home as possible. Out of sight, out of mind." Did the man shrug or shudder? "Best thing he's ever done for me." Distant eyes stared at something only Will could see. "Eventually I learned to pretend and adapt, too. Learned to fit in anywhere so well that sometimes even I had no idea who I was. Or had been." A great quality for an agent. Bad for someone trying to be a healthy and happy person.
Ethan had no idea what to say. How to react to something like this. He didn't want to settle for something as lame as saying he was sorry. "It wasn't your fault, any of it. No child should have to…" He trailed off and took a deep breath, trying not to let his emotions get the best of him. Will was still terrifyingly pale, appeared so young and fragile that it hurt. Finally Ethan figured out what to say. "I believe in you", he pointed out. "The whole team does." And somehow it'd have to be enough.
"I know." A very thin ghost of a smile could be seen momentarily. Today had torn open some deep but already scarred wounds. But they'd heal again. What other choice was there?
Ethan sighed, only then realizing how exhausted he was, and wondered how drained Will had to feel. He squeezed his friend's shoulder, hoping that the gesture was at least somewhat comforting. "Ready to go home?"
"Not yet." Will lifted his gaze towards the sun, suspiciously moist eyes squinting. "Let's sit here for a while."
So they did. Until sunset. And hoped that whatever the next day would bring, it'd be a better one.
End
A/N: Oh dear gosh…! What little-Will had to go through… (shudders) Thank gosh he's got friends for a family, now! Because his birth one is good for nothing.
Sooooooo… Good? Bad? Absolutely horrible? PLEASE, do leave a note to let me know! I'm REALLY nervous about posting this so hearing from you would mean A LOT.
Awkay, time for me to head to bed. THANK YOU, so much, for reading! Maybe I'll see you again one day.
Take care!