A/N: Welcome to how to annoy Alex Rider characters. I was looking at an Artemis Fowl one, and then I realized that there is only one other of these kinds of fics for Alex Rider and it's only for Yassen. So here is another one, for your enjoyment. They're all in good fun, but don't try this at home kids! Some of these characters aren't exactly open to being annoyed. Well, without further ado, ALEX RIDER!
Disclaimer: Alex Rider and all that goes with him belong to Mr. Anthony Horowitz and not me…
How to annoy: Alex Rider!
-Follow him around on missions/at the park/anywhere singing "Secret Agent Man" or the Mission Impossible theme. (Well, that's kind of obvious)
-Randomly punch/kick him. And when he asks why you just assaulted him, tell him you were testing his reaction time.
-Speak in a mocking British accent whenever you talk to him and always end in 'chap' or 'mumsy'.
-Steal his GameBoy and 'accidentally' set of the smoke bomb while riding on public transportation with him.
-If encounter with Alex Rider is in the United States, yell "JELLY! JELLY! JELLY!" whenever you are both in a restaurant/bakery. (This refers to that one moment in Skeleton Key where they try and make Alex say jelly instead of jam)
-Borrow his bike and 'accidentally' discover the heat-seeking missile launchers while biking by a McDonald's. (We have enough of those as it is.)
-Set his fangirls loose upon him while he is on a date with Sabina. Watch the ensuing chaos.
-Note: this only applies to girls. Walk up to him when he is out with Sabina, slap him and cry "I thought what we had was special!" You can do this if you are a boy, but it will be tons more awkward.
-Count how many times he passes out and then mention to him the number later.
-When he tells you about his multiple aliases or if you mention them yourself, tell him he may need to visit a psychiatrist because he has an identity crisis.
-Visit him in the hospital and eat all of his food/candies/other things in his room. Also hide the remote. And if he is restrained/in a full body cast, place everything he wants/needs just out of reach.
-Follow him to school and tell everyone that he is in intense training to be a Jedi and that's why he missed so much school.
-Draw hearts and smiley faces all over his Math homework.
-Jump in front of him when he is leaving school and say, "Want ssssome druuuuuuugsssss??" or "Alms for the poooooooooooor?" or even "My precccciousssssss!" if you like...
-When he is about to jump into action, yell "Operation Alpha Delta Beta Force GO!"
-Tap 'f-a-r-t' or 'b-u-r-p' over and over again in Morse code randomly when you sit next to him.
-Spray paint his bike pink and stick colorful flower and butterfly stickers on it.
-Make up unnecessary hand signals and use them whenever you follow him and he is sneaking around somewhere.
-Repeatedly ask him how to say curse words in all the languages he knows. Then repeat said curse words in public.
-Force him to go on the pony ride at the carnival.
-Tell people that his name is short for Alexandria…
A/N: Well, I hope that was at least entertaining. I'm not sure who to do next so I'll let my reviewers decide. Anyways, tata!
The Crazy Idiotic Genius, Chocolate Muffin.