TITLE: WRECKED - ALTERNATE ENDING TO DAMAGE CONTROL
PAIRING: BUFFY/OTHER –BRUCE NOVIKOV
DISCLAIMER: I don't own any characters except the ones I make up. They are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, etc. No copyright infringement is intended and no profit is made. My story is for entertainment purposes only.
RATING: - M – FOR ADULT THEMES. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE UNDERAGE, I ACCEPT NO RESPONSIBILITY IF YOU DO.
TIMELINE: FIRST PART STARTS RIGHT WHEN BUFFY AND ANGELUS ARRIVED IN RUSSIA FOR THE SURGERY BRUCE ARRANGED. THE REST WILL BE INDICATED AS THE STORY CONTINUES.
SUMMARY: HAVING RECOVERED WELL AFTER THE INJURIES SHE SUSTAINED, BUFFY'S WORLD IS TURNED UPSIDE DOWN IN AN UNEXPECTED TURN OF EVENTS. LOST AND FRIGHTENED, SHE TURNS TO A SOURCE OF COMFORT NO ONE WOULD HAVE EXPECTED.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: THIS IS MY FIRST BUFFY/OTHER PAIRING FIC. DON'T GET ME WRONG, I'M A DIE-HARD BUFFY/ANGEL (US) FAN AND THAT WILL NEVER CHANGE. I JUST LIKED THE CHARACTER SO MUCH AND I WANTED HIM TO HAVE A HAPPY ENDING.
AUTHORS NOTE: ENGLISH IS ONLY MY SSECOND LANGUAGE AND I USED AN ONLINE ASSISTANT TO HELP ME WITH WORDS OF ANOTHER LANGUAGE; PLEASE FORGIVE ME IF I GET IT WRONG.
PREVIOUSLY : RECAP
MOSCOW, RUSSIAN
Bruce stood motionless, rooted to the spot as he saw the nurses wheel Buffy out into the hall and towards the operating room. He and Maddox arrived just a few minutes ago and even though he wished he could go after Buffy and let her know he was there, if only in silent support, he knew he couldn't and it was driving him crazy.
When Doctor Morgan strode out of Buffy's room just a few minutes later and saw him and Maddox standing in the hall, she cast a glance back into Buffy's room before making her way towards them. Feeling, rather than seeing Maddox's body go tense, Bruce watched silently as the tall, elegant woman approached them, a reserved smile on her pretty face.
"Bruce, it's good to see you again." She said kindly as she leaned in to give him a quick hug.
Despite his somber feeling, he returned her smile warmheartedly, "Eva, you're looking as good as always." He complemented as he returned her hug. Just like he remembered, her light brown hair was still cut in an elegant bob ending at her jaw, her deep blue eyes as intense as ever, and even with the white coat over her matching shirt and skirt, she looked attractive and stylish.
Her smile was bright and kind as she pulled away to turn to Maddox, but he could sense the uncertainly in her; she was holding herself back, uncomfortable and unsure. As her eyes locked with Maddox's piercing green orbs, she felt herself being pulled back into the past, a past she didn't want to think about or rehash at this particular moment, "Maddox…" she said and instead of leaning in for a hug, extended her hand in greeting.
Maddox's eyes narrowed as he looked down at her extended hand, the look in his eyes telling her and Bruce just what he thought of the gesture. As the moments ticked by, Evangeline felt her insides turn and she let slip the mask of calmness for a fraction of a second. Bruce had silently been watching the interaction between the two, baffled by them.
Maddox looked up from her hand back to her lovely face, a scowl firmly in place. Clenching his teeth, he extended his hand to hers and shook it in a firm shake before she quickly pulled away. He'd known things might be a bit awkward when they saw each other again, but he didn't expect this; the cold detachment she directed at him. As he felt his temper rising, Maddox took a step back and clasped his hands behind his back.
Evangeline noted the move but didn't comment on it, "We are taking Buffy in now but I'll only be able to assess the full damage once I'm inside. Depending on what I find, I'll let you know how long it might be; it might be quick but it can also take a few hours so I suggest you make yourselves comfortable if you intend to wait." When Bruce nodded in agreement, she sympathized with him for wanting to stay during the young woman's surgery.
"I thought you might. I took the liberty of having a room prepared for you to wait in." she said as she indicated to the room. Once Bruce and Maddox were inside, she tried to reassure them, "I'm going to take very good care of her; you don't have to worry."
Just as she was about to turn and leave, Bruce's hoarse voice stopped her, "Please…she really needs this…" he begged, knowing she understood. He knew she couldn't make any promises but he wanted to know that she was going to do everything she could to make this happen.
Startled by the emotion she heard in his voice, she could only nod, hoping she didn't disappoint him. Turning on her high heeled pumps, she strode towards the operating room, eager to get things started.
Bruce looked after her for a few seconds then turned and scowled at Maddox, "You shook her hand?" he asked; his voice amused.
Maddox however wasn't and turned to take a seat in one of the chairs, "What was I supposed to do; grab her and pull her in for a passionate kiss?" he enquired as he rubbed a hand over his face wearily.
Bruce surprised him by answering, "Yes" with a glint in his grey eyes.
Scowling at his friend, Maddox leaned back in his chair, not about to indulge him and reply to that last comment. He was so angry he could barely keep himself in check; and he needed to be calm right now because Bruce needed him.
Bruce chuckled softly as he also took a seat and made himself comfortable. Frowning, he looked at Maddox, "What is going on between you two?" While Maddox and Evangeline had been dating she'd become like a little sister to him, a part of his family and he honestly thought that she and Maddox would get married; they'd seemed so in love and devoted to each other and he was shocked when they called it off. Maddox had never offered an explanation and he knew better than to ask for one.
Looking at Bruce, Maddox narrowed his eyes, "Will you tell me what's going on with Buffy if I do?" he countered. Seeing as Bruce was treading on dangerous grounds, he figured it opened a door for him to do the same.
Bruce looked away, seemingly withdrawing his question but then looked back at him, his eyes serious, "All right." he finally said. He and Maddox had always been very close; closer than brothers; they shared everything but where Buffy and Evangeline were concerned they were both very tight lipped and to be honest, it was irritating both of them. They knew everything and more about each other and for them to stop sharing now was absurd.
Closing his eyes as memories played in his mind, Maddox sighed, "She acts like she's afraid I'll jump or corner her. She treats me like an acquaintance when I know everything damn thing about her, when I've seen every inch of her…" he trailed off, frustrated.
After a calming breath, he carried on, "We were so happy, I knew she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with…a fact that was confirmed when she fell pregnant." He looked at Bruce and saw the shock there. "I wanted to tell you but she didn't want to jinx it; she said we should wait at least until it was three months along. I didn't mind waiting…I was so happy, so excited.
I'd planning on proposing to her before we even knew about the pregnancy. So after the news, I wanted to take her out on a romantic night and then propose. But when I got home, I found her on the bathroom floor, covered in blood and shaking so badly she couldn't stand up. She'd already known before we reached the hospital. She had a miscarriage…we were both devastated by the loss but she said it's common for first time mothers.
After that she became withdrawn and barely even spoke to me, crying all the time and refusing to talk to me. I know I'll never understand completely what she went through, but she had to know I was there for her, not matter what happened.
I still wanted her, losing the baby didn't change that or change how much I loved her. But, something changed in her and I couldn't do anything about it. It was happening right before my eyes and I stood helpless as she withdrew from me more and more every day.
It wasn't how I planned it but one evening I cooked dinner and had everything ready when she got home. She was so shocked but I could see a glimpse of the old Eva in her eyes that night. We talked and laughed and all the time I kept thinking how much I wanted to start a family with her, I almost said it too but I knew she wasn't ready to hear it. So I proposed, got down on one knee and everything…but she said no." Maddox remember the look of utter shock on her face as he presented the ring to her, the way she softly touched the ring before tears started running down her cheeks.
Maddox swallowed, his throat having gone dry, "She said I was only proposing because I felt sorry for her and I wouldn't have proposed if the miscarriage didn't happen. No matter how much I argued she wouldn't budge. She grabbed her coat and left. The next afternoon when I got home all her things were gone."
Bruce looked at Maddox, totally dumbstruck. He'd seen the change in Maddox all those months ago and it had worried him. Maddox had told him that he and Eva had broken up and even though Bruce wanted to pry he knew Maddox well enough to not ask questions. Over time Maddox became himself again, but there was always something missing, and now he knew what that was and what caused it.
"That night I found her on the bathroom floor, I thought my heart would stop with fear…I not only lost that child…the chance to become a father…but I lost Eva too." He said, his voice hoarse and deep with regret and sorrow.
Bruce swallowed, he couldn't even imagine if he had to go through something like that, "I'm sorry…" he said when he knew no words would make a difference.
Maddox nodded thankfully, "We spoke on the phone a few times but nothing personal. I phoned her when I learned of Buffy's injuries and while we were both polite there's this…barrier between us. I can't explain it but it feels like I did something wrong or there's something I'm not seeing." He said, heaving a deep sigh in frustration.
Bruce sympathized with his friend, "Do you still care about her?" he asked, thinking he already knew the answer.
Maddox snorted, "Yes, I'll always care about her; she's the only woman I've ever loved. It's the fact that I still love her that's the problem. And it's not for lack of trying. When she left I did everything I could think of but she pushed me away. Maybe the miscarriage was a way out for her; maybe she wanted to leave all along. Now we're shaking hands like acquaintances and acting polite in front of people."
Words couldn't describe the frustration he felt when she acted like that. He just wished she could acknowledge him and treat him with some semblance of familiarity…by god, they had been together for two years and known each other for much longer and now she couldn't even stand his touch for a few seconds longer than necessary?
Bruce remained silent, absorbing the new information.
"Your turn" Maddox stated as he leaned forward in his chair and pushed his hands through his dark hair in a gesture of annoyance and frustration.
Bruce tried to gather his thoughts; how and where would he start when he himself didn't even know. Maddox knew the basics, where and how it started, but it was the rest of their 'history' that was complicated and hard to explain. Words stuck in his throat, "I…from the first moment I laid eyes on her, I wanted her; maybe not as a companion but I wanted her so much I couldn't think straight. The few times we talked and had contact, I could see what an amazing person she was.
Not once did she look at me with resentment or disgust, she danced with me that night without flinching or forcing a smile; almost like she accepted everything about me, despite what I was and what I'd done. That night in the warehouse…the way she looked at me…she'd trusted me, I don't even think she knew it at the time, but some part of her trusted me not to shoot her… but I did and I'll never forget the look of betrayal on her face.
She was always on my mind, no matter how hard I tried to forget about her. Every time I looked at someone, touched someone, I wanted it to be her, I imagined it was her and when I came to my senses and she wasn't there I would be furious." It had been hard for him, it still was, but it felt good getting everything out. He knew Maddox would listen and never judge.
"One morning I woke up and I couldn't stand it anymore, I had to see her, had to have her and that's when I told you to find her."
Maddox nodded, remembering that day well. He's been so stunned by Bruce's order that day but he hadn't asked questions even though he wanted to.
"When I finally had her I was in a state of shock, being so near her, being able to touch her." Bruce shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. "I don't know what I'd been thinking, what I thought might happen; it's unthinkable that she would fall in love with me after I kidnapped her…But spending that time with her, even though she was scared of me, had been wonderful and I wouldn't give that up. I got to know her and in turn allowed her to get to know me. I just doomed myself actually because I knew I couldn't keep her. I think…I started caring about her." He finally admitted out loud.
Maddox's eyes had gone wide with shock, he'd suspected Bruce cared about Buffy, especially after all the trouble he'd gone through to get her the surgery. But Bruce just admitted he had feelings for her, and Bruce was a hard man, he rarely admitted he cared about anyone other than his family.
Maddox absorbed the information then said, "You did the right thing. By giving her back and giving her this, you showed her the man you truly are. You didn't the right thing Bruce." Maddox stated, awed by his friend.
Bruce nodded but didn't look at him, "I just wished it could feel right too." He stated.
Maddox nodded, his thoughts running around as the new information infiltrated his mind. How stupid they must look; two grown men alone in a room, love and happiness eluding them.
THREE HOURS LATER
Leaning casually against the wall with his shoulder, Maddox took in the silent whispers around him. The hospital was abuzz with activity but strangely enough everyone went about their business in a rather quiet manner. Looking at his watch again, he saw it has been three hours since they wheeled Buffy into surgery.
Looking over at Bruce, he could see the tension and stress rippling through his big body, betraying his concern and inner feelings. They arrived when Buffy was being wheeled into surgery and watched silently from a distance, neither Buffy nor Angelus knowing they were there and Maddox knew it was torture for Bruce to watch from the sidelines; not being able to see or speak to Buffy as they both knew it wasn't their place to interfere in a moment like this.
Bruce had been deadly quiet the entire time and to be honest it was driving Maddox insane. Pushing away from the wall with an irritated sigh, he walked towards the hallway, "I'm getting coffee, do you want anything?" he asked, already knowing Bruce was going to decline the offer. When Bruce shook his head Maddox huffed at him in annoyance but remained silent.
As Maddox left the room, Bruce sighed heavily as he looked at his watch again, Buffy had been in surgery for hours now and the longer it took the more worried he became. Was there too much damage that Eva couldn't repair it like she initially thought? He prayed that wasn't the case.
Getting up from the chair he walked over to the large window overlooking the landscape and tried to get his nerves and emotions under control. What would he do if the surgery wasn't a success? How devastated would Buffy be to learn that it had all been for nothing? He wanted to give something back to her, he knew he could never undo the damage, but he needed to do something and if this attempt failed, he would be at a loss.
He was so lost in thought that he didn't even hear when Maddox returned, fuming for some reason and take the seat he previously occupied. It was another hour before the door to their room opened and Evangeline strolled in, still dressed in scrubs. Both Maddox and Bruce swirled towards her, holding their breaths in anticipation.
Evangeline stepped in and closed the door behind her, making him dread what she had to say, "The surgery was a success." She declared with a smile.
Bruce closed his eyes in relief and felt his entire body uncoil from the previous tension, while Maddox said, "Thank god" rather harshly.
"The surgery took longer than I expected because there was a bit more damage than I thought. But she's young and healthy and I managed to repair the damage. They just wheeled her out and she's recuperating in her room." Eva said, happy to announce the news.
As she looked at the two men before her she could tell that in a way they were deeply touched by the young woman. She knew she should turn and leave but she lingered a few seconds later, her eyes going to Maddox where he stood next to Bruce.
Feeling the hole in her heart start to burn, she swallowed harshly. It hurt to look at him; because she knew what she'd given up…what she'd thrown away because of her own insecurities. Even after all the time that had passed, she still couldn't get him out of her mind, couldn't go one day without thinking of him, without feeling the pain in her entire being because she still loved him…and because she knew she could never have him back, not after what she did to him, after she hurt him so much.
Feeling emotions she tried to repress for the last couple of months return full blast, she placed a hand over her stomach to try and control the pain…at least until she way away from Maddox. Looking at the man that held her heart, she gave an awkward smile but lowered her eyes when they connected with his, and turned to leave.
Maddox watched with barely contained fury as Eva stepped out and closed the door behind her. Those few seconds their gazes connected he saw something flash on her face, but he couldn't explain what it was. Dispelling those thoughts, he focused on the present, relieved and happy to hear everything went well but he also knew Bruce wanted to wait before leaving.
"As soon as she wakes up we can go." Bruce said, his eyes locked on the ground.
Maddox nodded and walked back to his chair. He knew it wouldn't be long until a nurse came to see them but he was tired and exhausted for no reason. Ten minutes later a nurse informed them that Buffy had woken up and everything was fine.
As Bruce stood up and walked beside Maddox to the exit and their waiting helicopter, he felt his heart clench painfully. This would be the last time he'd ever be near Buffy, as hard as it was to accept he knew it couldn't be any other way. He'd done his part; given her something he hoped brought her happiness and now it was time to step aside and let her have her life back…and that life didn't include him.
As he and Maddox entered the helicopter, Bruce clenched his fists and forced his eyes to remain trained ahead of him and not stray towards the place he knew Buffy was resting. The chopper lifted into the air, taking them away…and leaving a part of him behind.
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THREE MONTHS LATER
LOS ANGELES
HAMPTON'S PRIVATE ESTATE ; BRUCE'S PENTHOUSE SUITE
Bruce slowly drifted awake, sunlight slipping past a small crack in the thick drapes. He didn't want to wake up yet, too tired from the night he just had. His body was stiff and sore from the fight he got into with a potential buyer and having to deal with five men at once.
The pillow was pressing into his face and he frowned as he inhaled the sweet flowery scent that clung to it. Opening his eyes he looked around, taking in the familiar surroundings of his bedroom. Turning his head he found the source of the overly sweet smell.
Memory returned as he recognized the woman beside him; Rachel was still asleep, her face turned towards him and the covers riding low on her waist, exposing her naked torso. Looking at her flesh he remembered touching and kissing it just a few hours ago, pleasuring her body with his, using hers to pleasure him in return. As they were passionately engaged he'd marveled at the softness of her skin…and marveled at how different it was from another particular woman's.
Groaning as his thoughts went that path again he turned his head away and rolled onto his back. He'd been staring at the ceiling for a few minutes when he felt movement next to him, followed by the eager little hands that stroked up his abdomen to his chest and down again. Rachel pressed kisses to his torso as she skimmed her hands over his muscular flesh.
Despite his foul mood, Bruce allowed her to continue her little exploration, knowing full well what she wanted. His mind may not have been up to it but his body responded and he rolled over, placing her beneath him, allowing her… using her to forget things he rather not think about.
Bruce sat back on his haunches as Rachel fell forwards on the bed, then slowly lowered himself to his stomach as his body gave in from the exertion. Burying his face in his pillow, he closed his eyes. When soft hands skimmed his shoulder and moved to his back, his eyes flew open, knowing where her hands were going. His body tensed as she ran her fingers over his flesh and the second she skimmed one of the raised scars, he clenched his fists to hold himself back.
"What happened?" Rachel asked in a soft voice as she looked at the scars littering his back. He never spoke much about his life and every time she asked he would divert her attention or change the subject. But she wanted to know, she wanted to know the man she was with, and he was making it so hard for her.
When he remained silent, she placed a kiss over his shoulder where her hand had just been and started moving lower, but the second she touched her lips to one of the scars, he rolled over and pulled away, an angry frown on his handsome face, "Don't touch it." He growled furiously. Rachel was shocked at his hostile behavior as she stared at him with wide eyes.
Without having to look, Bruce knew Rachel had a hurt and shocked expression on her face, but he didn't feel sorry for his treatment towards her. He didn't give her permission to touch his back, to touch his scars and the fact that she even dared to touch, let alone kiss the marks, angered him.
Pushing up from the bed, he got up and stalked to the bathroom, aware that she had a full frontal view of his scarred back. He didn't care about nudity but he didn't want her seeing the scars…they weren't hers to see.
He knew it was irrational but he didn't care, he wasn't ashamed of the scars, he just didn't want to share them because they represented something too precious to him and that he didn't want to share.
Starting the shower and stepping under the cold spray, he placed his hands against the tiled wall and leaned forward, allowing the water to wash the scent of lust from his skin. He didn't know why he kept doing it; comparing them…comparing them to someone they would never match up to.
Bruce longed for Rachel's flaming red hair to be blond; he wanted her deep brown eyes to be a light hazel. He wanted her body to be smaller than her 5ft 9 frame; he wanted her to be Buffy. As thoughts of her flashed through his mind, he felt his temper rise with it. He was angry, at himself, at Rachel and at everything that stood against him.
After washing he turned off the shower, grateful that Rachel hadn't followed him into the shower like she usually did. She was still sitting on the bed when he entered the room and started pulling on his clothes, his back burning as he felt her eyes boring into him. He could feel her uncertainty and anger in the air around him. She wanted answers, he knew that, but he wasn't willing to give them. He wasn't looking to bond with someone and if she wanted a meaningful relationship she knew where the door was.
Foregoing his usual formal attire this morning, he pulled on a pair of jeans and a black shirt and a thick jacket. He didn't even glance at Rachel as he finished dressing and finally stepped out of the room. He didn't care what she thought or what she felt, and if she wasn't there when he got back tonight he wouldn't care either. But he knew she would be…despite everything he did and didn't do…she was in his bed when he returned at night.
Looking at his watched as he entered the elevator, he knew Maddox would be waiting for him in the lobby. As the door whooshed open, he nodded at the bell boy before settling his gaze on Maddox where he waited at a table, two cups of coffee in front of him.
Looking at his long time friend and seeing the ever present scowl firmly in place, Maddox grinned as he quirked a brow at him, "Long night?" he asked humorously.
Bruce merely grunted as he took a seat and drank his coffee. Maddox chuckled softly, showing his enjoyment at his expense. His phone rang and as Maddox answered, Bruce waited patiently, sipping slowly at the hot liquid.
Maddox ended the call and shoved his phone in his pocket as he pushed away from the table, "Chase is waiting outside." They walked briskly to the waiting SUV and as soon as they were in, the car pulled away.
"We have a new buyer, Keanu made the link and he vouches for the guy. His name is Sergio Garcia and he's been the largest seller in the Cuban community for the past four months. Apparently his sales have gone up and his regular suppliers aren't producing quickly enough. If you give the go, I can have his order ready by tonight and we can leave at seven."
Bruce nodded, "How big is the order?" he enquired.
Maddox shuffled some papers, "Seven crates with semi-automatic's, and five crates with smaller handguns and bullets, comes down to five million." He said as he looked over the order again. It wasn't one of their biggest sales but they had to establish a connection first before they shipped the guns and maybe run the risk of losing the product to people who couldn't pay.
Bruce nodded, "All right." He knew Maddox had done all the needed research on the buyer and if one of his highest buyers vouched for him then he felt comfortable closing the deal.
Maddox nodded and was back on his phone, making arrangements and calling in his men to meet them at their hanger. They had a few meetings and two other deals to settle in town but they would be done to make the trip to close the deal.
As Maddox handed him a folder containing information on the buyer, his connections and his order, Bruce heaved a sigh of relief, he needed the distraction and couldn't wait to get the day started.
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