I own nothing.

I remember Mikasa seeing- Oh, by the way, spoilers.

I remember Mikasa seeing Eren's Titan form for the first time and she said something about it being "rage incarnate". Which I'm not saying he isn't humanity's rage incarnate but...

Okay, let me put it this way:

Mikasa: It was like watching the embodiment of humanity's anger...

...Hold Hulk's green soda.

So, yeah.

Also, I'm still catching up on the current story of Attack on Titan to synch up somewhat to the original story so if anything doesn't match up, that's why.

"I'm sorry but I don't think this will help."

"It does, trust me."

"Why can't I just help out with some research?"

"Because when you use work as an outlet and if it shows no signs of alleviation, it causes the last thing you need right now."

"Stress?"

"Stress. Now go on, just give it a try."

"..."

Okay, I'm not sure what this is or how I should start this off. I don't know how long I'll write in this thing until I forget about it and move onto other things, more important things. I've been so focused on containing it and I've noticed my temper isn't as easily accessible as it used to be since these people have helped me but I still can't but be cautious...

You know, I had considered this for a while now if I have a right to determine what makes a freak or if it's just hypocrisy and I should just shut my mouth about it. I think I've also figured out what it means to be an animal, as I've been finding all kinds of fruits, berries, and I've learned to be thorough lest I put something poisonous in my mouth. And yet, my...condition prevents me from any sort of meat. Not that I had done so previously, I've sworn to eat only vegetables but it's interesting to note that I can still keep some of my morals from shattering.

"Yes, now keep going. Don't worry about consistency. Just write."

A debate has since sparked over what exactly is it that makes a human, monster, or a creature. I think I've got it down, actually: a human is a person of free will that has a chance to really think about what it's doing, a monster is anything that can kill without remorse or reason, like the Titans, and a creature is in the middle. Creatures can't always be understood, you can't really identify it, and you're not always sure if you can trust it. If you know the full context of what I'm talking about, then we all know who fits this category and how strange it is to somehow use this as a means of claiming victory.

I don't know if I'm a man with growing fears and insecurities or if I'm an explosive that's taking its sweet, old time to go off and just kill everyone in its space, even if it's not trying to kill anything. I know for a fact that I am not a soldier because it seems all they've been doing is spreading their arms wide open and waiting for either the monsters to kill them or for the bomb to erase them from existence. And yet, somehow this has brought me closer to them then I had ever hoped for. Everyone is taking a big gamble with this, using monsters in their battles, I mean. No, that's harsh. I suppose these Titan Shifters are all just idiots who have been given to much power to know what to do with. So what better way to have such power exist than to have soldiers or warriors exploit them to bring down anomalies that threaten our existence. I myself could just as well be one of these anomalies!

"Doctor, you're shaking..."

"I'm alright. Just...nerves.

I know I might be rambling and anyone reading this has absolutely no idea what I'm talking about but I've been in desperate need of ventilation that doesn't involve the world getting chaotic in a blind rage. Yes now I know I have to introduce myself: my name is-

"Dr. Bixby!"

I pause from my writing and look at my companion sitting across from me. My companion, Nifa, is a short haired girl with straight bangs and ends wearing her soldier uniform at an average height. She serves as my "first lieutenant" if you will, and ensures I have someone to talk to so my "friend" doesn't have to step in. She points behind me and I look over my shoulder to find another soldier on the land gesturing for us to come back to the cabin.

"Well, looks like they're ready. How about you?"

I turn back to look at her and there's a slight pause in the air which almost makes things awkward. Fortunately, no awkwardness passes and I politely nod my head ready to leave the boat. I reach for the paddles but then Nifa insists to row us back to shore. That's fine by me, I get to go back to my thoughts.

That question confused me at first but then I remind myself "I'm not a prisoner" and I'm tossed back into a new barrage of thoughts. Whether this is out of kindness for his deeds or just because they knew nothing can work, I don't know but I suppose it's sometimes better to be safe than sorry. In a sense, repeating the words "don't think about it" and actually expelling the subject from your mind are two completely different things entirely. And the first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one...

I have to think back. Now that I'm here, I'll have to organize past events in my life and if I don't have something ready, I'll look like some stuttering trainee that everyone here can do without right now. Alright, let's do this...

No full details right now and I know I'm not the first one to come up with this concept but, as you can tell, this isn't the same character you think it is. I will try to update on a good basis as I have been trying to get this out for a while now and I have a hardworking partner, The Amesiac, who's been in on the thinking process for this and he's making sure that I don't fuck this up so if you like what you'll read in the future, thank him. Until next time...