OF COURSE I own Ouran…not. Just deal with it.

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Congratulations, you are now the proud owner of Kuma-chan Inc. second edition, "Ahiru-chan!" Your cute, adorable new Ahiru comes with 3 different outfits, "Super Duck, Sleepy Duck, and Fashion Duck!" Make sure you read the rest of this Owners Manual, so you can see Kuma-chan Inc's full range of Kawaii! Plushies.

Having had enough, Hikaru ripped the manual in two. He glanced down at the toy, and shuddered. "Are you sure this is what Tono wants?"

"Well, he HAS been raving about the disgusting thing for two weeks now. I seriously think that he's finally gone totally loony though. Oh well, if he doesn't want it we could rip off its head or something, maybe torture it a bit before."

Kaoru had been right to question Tamaki's sanity. With its two blushing red cheeks, cute smile, perky little nose, and furry, snuggable body, the Kuma-chan Inc, second addition "Ahiru-chan!" could be described with one word only, revolting.

As Tamaki's birthday had slowly approached, the "King" of the host club had started "hinting" at his like towards Ahiru-chan. He had pranced up and down the 3rd Music Room singing the jingle to Ahiru-chan's ad, and when told politely by Kyoya to be quiet, or not so politely by one of the twins to "SHUT UP!", he'd sulk in his favourite corner cultivating mushrooms until Haruhi or Honey (or another kind-hearted and slightly stupid person) commented that "The song was kinda catchy". Hearing those words or something alike, Tamaki would spring up and start singing again, twice as loud and with increased vigour.

After the clubs customer request had gone down, Kyoya had finally gotten angry, and had threatened Tamaki to stop singing or he'd get no more commoner coffee or ramen. Tamaki, shocked speechless, had reluctantly agreed, and had spent the rest of the day with his growing stash of mushrooms.

Soon, Tamaki had reverted to other options. He started leaving notes of just how much he loved Ahiru-chan all over the place. There were large "I LOVE AHIRU" posters stuck on every wall in the 3rd music room, and the bright, neon cardboard was starting to get to everyone, even Honey. Everyone, that is, except Kyoya. He was just happy that Tamaki had finally shut up, and the clubs customers had found the new wallpaper "charming".

Haruhi had given up, and, with sore eyes, was escaping to the library at every possible opportunity.

It wasn't until Kyoya sat on a thumbtack meant for one of the half-stuck posters on the wall that he finally decided that change needed to happen. He couldn't order Tamaki to take the posters down, as the customers loved the host clubs "new look". Instead, he had sent the twins to buy one of these "Ahiru-chan" that Tamaki had been obsessed with.

And so, the twins had gone and bought the plushie.

Hikaru glanced down at the slightly disturbing toy in his hands once more before shrugging, and continued walking towards the car park. "Oh well, as long as it will get rid of those damn posters", he muttered.

The next day, before school started, the twins had found Tamaki, and had given him the gift. Tamaki accepted it graciously, but had a somewhat melancholy face. "Oh, wow…thanks you two. If only………nah, never mind. Well, thanks for the soft toy anyway."

The Hitachin's were puzzled, but soon forgot about Tamaki's weird reaction to the gift. It was only later that day, when they got to the 3rd music room, that they realised what had happened.

When Kaoru opened the door to their club room, they were greeted with an unexpected sight. No longer were the walls covered in yellow……but pink. The host clubs most narcissist member had replaced all the "I LOVE AHIRU" posters with "I LOVE BUTA-CHAN" ones.

Everyone in the club was shocked, and Haruhi was developing a bad migraine.

"Soo……" Hikaru commented, "Do we get to torture the duck thing now?"

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Vocab

Ahiru - Duck

Kuma - Bear

-chan - a cutesy way to end a name

Kawaii - cute

Tono - my lord

Hehe, wrote this on a total whim, in one sitting. SOOO sorry that everyone is OOC, that it makes no sense, that the plot's weird, and that it's so short. (or at least I think so) What else to say hmmn….I love Kyoya? And that I'm sorry I stuck a thumb tack in his butt?

…Anyways, pretty please with a… free reply to your review on top read and review! I don't mind flames…I have a fire extinguisher! xD