Title: Lilies and Pears
Themes: family dynamics/child abuse
Rating: T
Word Count: 1,586
Disclaimer: I do not own Veronica Mars or related characters and settings.
Hatred. That's all Logan could feel as he walked back to his bedroom at the late hour. It was after midnight. He had just been to see his father in his office. It was a gigantic room that was rarely used. Like much of the Echolls' enormous house, it was mostly for show. Just something else to prove to the world that they were rich. Better than everyone else. The walls were lined with glossy movie posters of Aaron's various action hits. The furniture in the room alone could probably buy a family groceries for a year. But what did a man like Aaron Echolls care about the average American family for? thought Logan as he entered his room and shut the door behind him. Aaron Echolls didn't even care about his own family. Aaron Echolls only cared about himself. No matter the charities he endorsed or how polite he was in interviews or how often he spewed the same over rehearsed lines about giving back to the community, the fans, the whole god-damned universe. His father was an opportunist and that was that.
Logan got into bed. He tried to lie on his back but it was no good. Sighing and frustrated he flipped over on to his stomach. He berated himself. For whatever else Aaron was, he was still his father. Aaron loved him. Right? Didn't he? Logan squeezed his eyes shut. Aaron insisted he did. Every time they had one of their little meetings. Like tonight. He had a terrible way of showing it. No, Logan's fist instinct was right. This wasn't love. This was hell. Maybe his dad was psychotic. That would explain it. There were a lot of maybes and what ifs. None of them ever amounted to anything.
If only the guys could see him like this, mused Logan. See the way his father reduced him to his lonely cynicism. What would they say if they found out his sarcasm was actually a defense mechanism. A front. He shook his head. They'd never know. It wasn't like they could do anything anyway. Duncan would try to help. Or at least nag him about getting help. Dick, well, was Dick. Dick didn't know how to take anything seriously, was probably afraid of what that would mean. People like Dick didn't want to grow up too fast. Didn't want to see things for what they really were. Logan couldn't blame him. Not really. If you had to be delusional, might as well think life was a big party, right? Oh, he knew what Dick would say. He'd tell him that cynicism and loneliness were for people like Veronica.
Logan couldn't disagree. She was cynical and lonely. He had made her that way. Him, Duncan and everyone else in the 09 zip. Suddenly he felt guilty. Lilly would've been so pissed to learn they had turned her into a pariah. Lilly would've gone from her usual playful attitude into something much more somber. She would've been disappointed. Veronica was her best friend. Veronica had been his friend once too. Duncan's girlfriend. But Veronica had made her choice and the 09ers had made theirs. God, he missed Lilly. If she were still here then everything else would've been bearable.
Logan didn't get much sleep that night. He hated sleeping on his stomach. He couldn't stop thinking. He hated his father. He loved his father. He wanted his father to love him. It was too much feeling for one person. Logan felt like he was about to explode. When light finally dawned through his large windows he got out of bed and went to the kitchen.
"Morning, son!" Aaron said cheerfully.
Logan glared at his father. "Morning." he muttered.
"Oh my god, Logan, talk about bed head!" exclaimed Trina from the living room. She was watching some morning talk show.
"Shut up, Trina. Don't act like you didn't spend forty-five minutes putting on makeup before you came down!" Logan retorted.
"You are so touchy in the morning," laughed Trina, "I'd almost forgotten."
Logan rolled his eyes and began making toast. If it wasn't his dad, it was Trina. If it wasn't Trina it was…Veronica. They weren't even friends and she was still finding ways to invade his life. Annoying as hell to boot. Oh wait, that applied to pretty much everyone.
"Stop arguing, kids. It's not even eight yet." said Aaron.
"Sorry, daddy." apologized Trina. She came into the kitchen and kissed their father on the cheek. Logan fought the urge to gag. She was such a suck up!
"Never mind, sweetheart. What are you up to today?" asked Aaron.
"Oh, I'll be in and out of auditions all day. Got some shopping planned with a couple of girl friends." answered Trina.
"What are you going for this time?" asked Logan, "Bitchy girl number two or third tree from the left?"
"That's enough Logan!" said Aaron sternly. Trina hugged him and glared over his shoulder at Logan proudly declaring that she was the favorite. Like Logan gave a shit. She kissed Aaron again and practically skipped out the front door.
"You should be nicer to your sister you know." said Aaron.
"She asks for it." answered Logan. He began spreading peanut butter on his toast.
"Your sister wants to be an actress and it'd be nice if this family could support her as a whole." lectured Aaron.
"Oh please. She's been at this since she graduated high school. You know what I think?" asked Logan.
"What's that?"
"I think it doesn't matter how many favors you call in or how many people you both know. If she sucks, she sucks. All the connections in the world can't change that." Logan smirked.
"Okay Logan I can see that today you're going to be in one of your moods. We'll discuss this when you get home from school." sighed Aaron.
"What? That money really can buy happiness?" retorted Logan. He was pushing his father on purpose. It was all a game. Not one that he expected to win but he'd be damned if he didn't at least have some fun.
"No, that respect for both your sister and myself is something you ought to develop." answered Aaron, his impatience clearly growing.
"You're right dad! By the way, I was hoping we could start a family game night! Nothing beats a good old fashioned game of Monopoly with my dad! Oh damn, Trina's going to be shopping with all her bestest pals. She'll just have to miss out!" Logan sing-songed. Then his voice abruptly changed back to normal. "I'm going to school."
Aaron changed the subject, this time the epitome of calm. "You should eat some fruit, son. It's important to get all four food groups in. Here, have a pear." He tossed his son the pear which Logan caught like a baseball.
He glared at the offending object as if it were poison. He glanced at his father. "I hate pears."
"Oh come on, they're good for you!" persisted Aaron.
"No!" Logan shouted. "I don't like them, is that so hard to understand?"
"You don't have to get snappy, it was only a suggestion." said Aaron.
Logan's head was swimming. He put the pear back on the table. How could his father not realize? How? That was a stupid question. If his father had ever realized anything then he wouldn't be in this situation. Even if he did, it wasn't his style to talk about it. Aaron preferred to pretend like nothing bad ever happened, like even the smallest disagreement never occurred. That Trina wasn't a spoiled brat, that his mother hadn't been an alcoholic. The only thing it seemed, Aaron had never kidded himself about, was whether or not Logan was good enough. He decided that was the difference between him and Veronica. Her dad wasn't living in a dream world. Keith Mars knew better than most, that your actions had consequences while Aaron thought he could get away with anything. Logan then noticed his father was still talking to him.
"…Logan, are you listening to me? Where's your head at?" asked Aaron.
"Umm, somewhere on Mars?" Logan suggested.
Aaron sighed. "Go to school, Logan. And I better not hear about any more misbehavior, do you hear me?"
"Loud and clear, general." Logan piped up. He gave his dad a salute, grabbed his toast, then left. He walked to the driveway and got inside his yellow Xterra. He gingerly sat back in the driver's seat making sure the pressure on his back wasn't too uncomfortable. He was picking up Duncan on his way to school and he wanted to avoid awkward questions. Ten minutes later and he was at the Kane estate and honking his horn.
"You look like hell." Duncan commented as he got into the passenger's seat.
"Thanks. You look as pretty as a princess!" Logan quipped.
Duncan rolled his eyes. "Who spat in your eggs?"
"Do you want the full list or just the abbreviated version?" asked Logan.
"Forget it." said Duncan. "Surfing after school?"
"Sure, remind me to pick up my wetsuit later." Logan agreed.
Logan had the impression that today was going to be one of those days. But Logan had pushed through before and he could do it again. There wasn't much choice, really, he thought as he approached Neptune High's parking lot. He was bruised, sure but he'd never let his dad break him. Logan knew he was stronger than that. He would never give his dad the satisfaction.
