THIS IS DEDICATED TO MY FRIEND GIANNA (wolves-eye). She is a wonderful friend, and she was also the first person to read Twilight when I was prancing through the halls, waving the book around, screaming "THIS HAS TO BE THE BEST DAMNED ROMANCE BOOK IN THE HISTORY OF ROMANCE BOOKS!" I love this girl. She rocks. Soo, this is for you! -hugs-
And thanks for expelling my fears...XD I love you so much...
I wrote this a WHILE ago--like I'm going to say sometime back in September--but was nervous to put it up. It's nine and a half pages of...fluff/romance/angst/drama/horror. I really didn't wanna write it, but, as all of my stories do, it kept gnawing at me so I was finally like "Oh, fine," and wrote it. I've been nervous to put it up but finally got the guts to give it to my friend Gianna (this is dedicated to her for that...as well as a few other reasons xD), and she said it was good so...yeah. Here you go.
Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Edward...although I think Edward owns Bella...o.O; Eh, I dunno.
Enjoy! Oh...and please no flaming. :3
P.S--for those of you who know me only too well, this isn't JacobxBella. It's pure, mushy-gutty-lovey-dovey EdwardxBella mixed with a really bizzare twist.
P.P.S--inspired by Darkened-Harmony's story called "Contangious" which is a Darren Shan fanfic. She wrote about the DS charas getting sick so I decided to kind of...uhm...yeah.
Bella clung to Edward tightly, her fingers wrapped tightly around his shirt. "Don't leave me!" she wailed, looking him straight in the face. "I won't be able to fall asleep without you in here!"
Edward chuckled, bringing his arms around Bella and pulling her into a tight embrace. "I would never leave you for one moment," he said into her hair, breathing slowly and steadily. Bella rose and fell along with his body, her heart filled with the nearly unbearable love for him. "I just need to get some new clothes on. It becomes uncomfortable sitting in the same clothes for too long…" His voice trailed off into nothing, letting Bella enjoy the loving hug a bit longer.
He pulled away from her but quickly placed her face in his cupped hands. "I'll be back in a minute—tops. I promise you."
She sniffed and stared into his honey golden eyes. "You promise?"
"Yes, I promise." His lips curved into the lop sided smile that she loved. "If I'm lying…I'll let Jacob date you."
Bella's face scrunched up in fear. "Please don't be any longer than a minute!" Her voice was desperate for him as she let go of him. Her hands gravitated towards her neck as she fingered the unmarked skin idly.
Edward's quiet laughter became a ghost in the room, echoing around the walls as he disappeared. She slowly walked over to the bed and sat down on it, sighing slightly, and let her mind reel.
The past few weeks had been disastrous. It all seemed to point right back at Jacob, too. Why had he thought bringing the motorcycle to her home would be enough to keep her away from Edward? All it did was infuriate Charlie, which ultimately lead to Charlie kicking Bella out. Okay, Bella mused, he didn't kick me out—I left. He had said "It's either you stop dating Edward or you don't live here!" so I took that as a ticket to leave. He was shocked, sure, but I think part of him expected it. It's what mom did.
Bella flinched as she realized the length of what she had done. But she couldn't do anything to take back her actions—Carlisle was officially her guardian. She lived with Carlisle and Esme and Edward. She was officially a "Cullen", or at least she was around her school. There was nothing she could do about it.
She sighed slightly and looked towards the door. She loved living with Edward, as she was sure Edward and the whole family—as well as the whole school—knew, but she was a bit disappointed that they weren't going to change her until she graduated. She couldn't wait that long. The three months seemed like an eternity, an eternity that would never happen.
"Maybe that will discourage you from wanting to be a vampire," Edward had said with a hard look on his face and in his eyes. "We live for an eternity. If you can't wait for a simple three months, maybe we should reconsider…" His tone had become hopeful.
"No way," Bella had said firmly. "I'm staying with you—forever. I don't care if it will seem long. At least I'll be with you."
Edward had looked away then, but Bella couldn't figure out why.
Suddenly the door creaked open and Edward entered, hands in his back pockets. Bella slept in Edward's room—they had bought a very comfortable bed for her—but Edward always stepped out of the room to get dressed. Bella felt a smile spread across her face as she saw him. He came over to her and sat down on the bed, arms outstretched, waiting for Bella to take the invitation and sit in his lap.
Bella gladly hopped into his lap and snuggled her chin against his cold chest. She heard, faintly, Edward's quiet laugh, but she could more or less feel it as it passed from his body and into hers.
Quietly but surely, Bella began to drift off into a comfortable sleep. She was, however, startled awake by a firm hand shaking her. She awoke, finding herself lying in the bed in a tight ball as if she were still clutching to Edward. When she opened her eyes, she was looking into Carlisle's face.
"Carlisle?" Bella asked sleepily, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. Her sweat pants were sticky against her skin. Her neck prickled uncomfortably, as if she were sensing something was very wrong within the household.
"Bella, you need to get up, now," Carlisle whispered quietly, carefully slipping his hands across her back and under her knees. He picked her up, bridal style, and began to carry her out of the room. "Something has happened…"
"What?" Bell asked, perplexed. She couldn't think properly through the misty veil of sleep, making her think everything was basically okay—maybe Charlie had come banging on the door to get her back. She yawned. Maybe some other vampires had come and they had smelled a human in the house. She didn't know, but through the haze she couldn't bring herself to care.
She looked into Carlisle's face and saw that he was frowning deeply at her. "Jasper has…ah…gotten sick."
"Excuse me?"
Carlisle stared at her wearily. "Jasper has gotten sick."
"But vampires don't get sick."
"No, not normally, but they can," Carlisle said softly, almost too softly for Bella to pick up.
"How sick is he?" she asked.
Carlisle looked away from her and let her down in the foyer. "Very. And humans can not be around him currently. Edward is going to take you to Seattle for a little bit." The strange look in Carlisle's face betrayed that he didn't think it was the best idea. "Alice is staying with Jasper. Esme might stay. Emmett and Rosalie are most likely going to stay here with us and help." He was staring up at the stairs now.
Abruptly and unexpectedly Bella heard a howl of pain. Anguish filled the house like a chorus of screams, each lowly note making Bella shudder with unimaginable ache. She stared at the stairs blankly.
Suddenly Alice's face appeared. She looked disheveled and worried, somehow, her hair falling into her face. "He needs human blood!" she gasped. "Damn it," she muttered after that as they all heard another agony filled scream. "Why hadn't I seen this coming?"
"Don't blame yourself," Carlisle soothed. "Is it completely necessary that he have human blood?"
Alice nodded weakly. "He's begging me for it. But what do we do? It's not as if we can just go into town and pick up a random person…" She gawped at Carlisle.
"No, it's not." Carlisle frowned. "I might be able to get into the hospital's blood supply, but I'm not sure how long I can do that without being questioned."
Bella stared in shock at the two vampires. She had never even taken the thought into consideration that they would ever drink human blood—let alone consider doing so. But here they stood, looking grimly at each other, discussing trying to find human blood without killing anyone.
Edward banged open the front door loudly and made a beeline towards Bella. "We need to get out of here. Now." He looked towards Alice, and nodded slightly. "Yes, he is probably feeling worse because he can smell her."
He grabbed Bella's hand firmly and dragged her out of the house and to Emmett's huge jeep. He literally threw her in the front seat, flew to the driver's side, and buckled her in, doing all of this in less than a minute.
"What's going on?" Bella asked. Edward turned to gaze at her as he backed out of the long driveway, turned around slightly, and started driving forward down the road. His face betrayed nothing, but Bella could sense the tension between them.
He sighed, deciding to tell her. "There is a sickness that vampires can get," he said quietly. "It's very rare and normally only occurs in vampires that drink human blood—if it ever occurs at all. It's very contagious to those who live together in packs as well. A simple breath can pass it to another vampire…," he began, then stopped and stared at the road. They were already on the highway. "It makes the vampire crazy. All they can think about is blood. Blood. Blood. Blood. Their whole lives revolve around blood. Human blood, animal blood, anything they can get their shivering hands on. But the scariest thing is…it differs from vampire to vampire. Some vampires just go out and slaughter whole towns. Other vampires change any human they can find. Others just need to drink as much as possible. It's impossible to tell."
Bella shivered. But there was something she didn't understand. "If it's contagious yet rare…?"
"It hardly ever develops. And when it does it's only contagious for one hour—the person who developed it is only infectious for that simple hour, but, as I said, any vampire that was around them at that point would have caught it."
"Oh." Bella stared at the road. "Does that mean you might get it?"
"I don't know," Edward answered calmly. "I'd hope not."
They had reached Seattle. Bella looked over at Edward, worry stinging in her glance. Edward's face was hard as stone—unsurprising—and looked as if he were trying desperately to hide something from Bella. Bella looked away, not wanting to look at his pained expression, and hopped out of the car after he unbuckled her. The two walked towards the hotel numbly, ignoring the stares and gossiping people that they passed.
Edward quickly swiped the card in the door and went straight to one of the beds. He tapped the spot beside him hollowly. Bella went towards him, slightly anxious, and sat down. She looked up at him, but he looked straight forward.
"Bella?" he asked after a few moments. Bella continued to stare at him. "I want you to promise me."
Bella gulped. She knew what was coming, and didn't want to give her word to him. She wouldn't care if Edward were to get sick. All she cared about was staying by his side. Couldn't he see that?
"If I get sick…just…leave. Hop in the Jeep and get out of Seattle. I'll be back when I feel better." He stopped and looked at Bella. Bella saw, with astonishment, that his golden eyes had turned onyx quickly, as they normally did when he was serious. "Hell, the sickness only lasts a few hours. Hopefully I'll have enough self control…"
"Edward, I won't leave you," Bella mumbled, hugging him. Edward stiffened slightly, but then relaxed into the hug and wrapped his arms around her once more. "Even if you're sick I won't leave."
"You might change your mind."
"I doubt it."
"You have never seen a vampire sick…"
"So?" Bella inquired, looking at him strangely. "Nor have you—besides Jasper. And as you said, it differs from vampire to vampire. Who knows? Maybe you'll be immune to the worst of it. You never know."
"Yes, you never know," Edward chuckled darkly. "As you said, I could be picking flowers in the field…or I could be slowly drinking you dry." His face became hard as he stared at Bella. Bella sighed and snuggled against his chest.
"You won't try to kill me," she breathed into his chest. "I know you won't."
Lightly petting her hair, Edward shook his head. "You are so naïve."
""Maybe," Bella sighed. She was becoming exhausted, her eyes drooping lazily. But she didn't want to sleep. Especially not under the circumstances. "But…at least I'm naïve and looking on the bright side."
Edward began to hum her lullaby then, and Bella had no choice but to drift off to an unwilling land of dreams then.
"Edward!" she shouted, looking around the room. It was dark, and somehow reflective. Dark shapes loomed in the corners of the room, as if things resided there. She shivered and draped her arms around herself, still looking for Edward.
"Edward?"
Then, in the distant corner of the room, a figure immerged. A sinister silhouette of a person, standing by a glowing "Exit" sign. "Yes, Bella?" It was Edward! Bella suddenly felt all of the senses of foreboding disappear. It was Edward. She was safe. She was safe.
The lights flickered on, and she realized she was in adance studio. Mirrors lined the walls, and in the corner of the room was Edward, but he looked different. Bella felt herself slowly sinking back into the murky depths of worry. But why worry? Edward would help her…Edward would save her…
A sneer tugged at Edward's lips. He came forward to Bella, his eyes a strange color…what color was it? They were dark, sure, but they weren't exactly onyx…more like…a deep crimson.
She blinked as Edward grabbed Bella's arms tightly, his fingers engulfing her forearm. "Edward?" she whispered, looking up into the face that she had loved for so long…that looked so different.
"Yes, Bella," Edward said softly, his sneer widening. "I suppose it is me."
"What happened to your eyes?" Bella heard fear tint her words, which Edward heard as well. He continued t sneer.
"Nothing, really," he said airily. "Just a change of color…"
No matter how hard Bella tried, she couldn't remember what crimson eyes meant. Were they bad? Did they mean he was hungry? No…onyx meant that he was hungry…crimson…maroon…they seemed so menacing…but she just couldn't figure out what was so bad about them.
The grip on Bella's arm was starting to become painful. "Uhm, Edward?" She looked up at him expectantly. "You're hurting my arm…"
Edward laughed cruelly at that. Bella blinked, unaccustomed to that particular laugh, and stood with real fear in her heart. "Yes, Bella, I know it hurts. I want it to hurt." Bella's eyes grew wide as he said that. "This is nothing compared to the pain you will feel…"
"Edward!" Bella nearly wailed. "What the hell is wrong with you—"
"Come on, Bella," Edward suddenly snarled. "Put two and two together. What was I telling you earlier? Jasper…sicknesses…"
"You're sick?" Bella asked, blinking slightly. "But…how did we get down to Phoenix if you're sick?"
Edward's lip curled slightly. "We're not in Phoenix. We're still in Seattle. And as for your other question…yes, I believe I am sick." He tightened his grip on Bella's arm. "And I think I'm thirsty."
Bella began choking as he said this, unsure of how to deal with this new and strange Edward. He was thirsty…okay…but was he going to kill her? She could live with that, maybe, but not without Edward…never without Edward…
He lowered his face to her neck. "Shall we do it the traditional way?" he asked, his voice silken honey. It rolled off Bella, seemingly a nice question but really filled with malice and the want of her pain. Her breath caught in her throat as she stared into the crimson eyes.
And then she remembered.
Crimson meant he was hungry for human blood.
She stiffened under his grip, which only made Edward chuckle and bend down towards her exposed neck. He breathed against it, taking in the scent. "How about in the arm?" He brought his face towards her arm. "I think I shall do it on the arm…"
He brought his teeth down into her arm.
Bella awoke, jumping straight up in bed, sweat pouring down her face. The room was dark, but Edward sat still on the bed next to her, his eyes fixed on her. Bella desprately wanted to see if his eyes were crimson…oh, please, please let them be butterscotch gold or onyx or something!
Edward continued to stare at her. "Bad dream?" he asked quietly. Bella nodded slightly, not wanting to look at Edward fully. She was scared, even though she didn't want to admit it. The Edward in the dream…so ready to kill her…
Suddenly the light turned on. Bella gasped slightly and brought her head around franticly to look at Edward. His eyes were black. His eyes were black. She breathed a sigh of relief and stared down at her hands.
"What did you dream about?" Edward asked.
"N-no-nothing," Bella stuttered. "I-I j-just had a ba-ba-bad dre-e-am."
Edward didn't buy it.
She looked away from him.
"Go back to sleep," Edward told her. "You'll feel better in the morning…"
Bella slowly lowered her head, not wanting to displease Edward. She was frightened of him, for the first time in her life.
Agony flared into her, each pour spilling pain and anguish. She howled, which made this bizarre new Edward chuckle.
"It hurts, doesn't it?" he asked. Bella lay on the floor, writhing in pain. Edward had bit her! Edward had bit her! What the hell was up with that? She had wanted it, but not under these circumstances…never under these ones…she wanted to be with the entire family, and be in a bed or something. Not lying on the floor, next to a sinister reincarnation of Edward.
"Now do you see what you've been asking for?"
Bella was in too much pain to speak. Radioactivitive poison was the only explanation for how much pain she was in. Tiny suns had erupted inside her body, firing away at her skin and at her innards, laughing sickly as they made silent and burning tears trickle down her cheeks. She curled up into a ball, as to stop the horrible and gut wrenching pain, and howled once more.
"You're getting your wish, Bella," Edward whispered. "Wish you never asked for it now?"
"N-no," Bella gasped. "At le-least I'll be-be-be with yo-o-ou from now on!"
She could taste Edward's sneer. "Maybe…maybe not…"
She fainted then, unable to handle the pain.
When Bella woke up, it was still dark. But something different about it. She realized it was becoming dark—she had slept the day away. She shivered and sat up, looking for Edward. He was no where to be found.
But then, distantly, a moan of anguish. She hopped out of the bed, knowing automatically that it was Edward, and looked for the source.
It had come from the bathroom.
Slowly, she opened the door and peered in. "Edward?"
"Get out," Edward snarled. Bella opened the door and saw him lying against the bathtub, pain lanced across his face, his arms wrapped tightly around his knees. "Go to Forks! Now!"
"Edward? Are you getting sick?"
"Yes! Now go! Go! Go!" Bella watched with horror as his onyx eyes changed slowly to crimson.
"I won't leave," she whispered, unsure of how true her words were. "I never promised you I would leave."
Edward growled, his eyes closed. "Damn it, Bella," he shouted. "Just leave! Get the hell out of here!"
Bella gulped but forced herself to sit down on the tile. "No."
"You idiot!" Edward moaned. "I'll kill you if you don't leave!"
"No, you won't," Bella whispered, thinking of her dream. Edward's eyes snapped open and he glared at her.
"What makes you so sure?" he asked weakly.
"I just know." She looked away, but Edward had already dropped it. He sighed and moaned once more. Bella didn't know what to do. She knew she should help him, but she was human. She was probably making him feel sick just by being that close to him.
"Is there anything I can do to help you?" Bella asked after a few hushed moments.
Edward shook his head. "Since you refuse to leave…"
Bella sighed and curled up slightly. She wasn't even aware that she had drifted off to sleep for the third time in one day.
When she awoke, she found herself, once more, in a darkened room. But it wasn't the hotel room. The room was somehow reflective, in an odd way. "Edward!" she shouted. She looked around for him.
"Edward?"
Out of the corner of her eye she saw a figure appear in the corner of the room. He was shrouded in shadows, his tall form leaning idly against the frame of the door. Bella's breath caught in her breath. Was it Edward? And why did this seem so familiar? She played with her fingers lightly, looking straight at the door. The glowing "Exit" sign cast an eerie light on the silhouette, but she still couldn't tell who it was.
"Yes, Bella?"
It was Edward! But she couldn't bring herself to feel safe from the simple and melodic voice. Something disturbing was planted behind the voice she loved so dearly. She stared.
The lights flashed on, causing Bella to have to close her eyes from the blinding light. When she opened them again, it was Edward leaning against the doorframe, arms enclosed tightly around himself. He stared at Bella, a slight leer on his lips.
He began to walk forward, more or less sauntering, and Bella automatically noted his eyes were still that deep crimson. She gulped. If her dream was anything like what Alice had…she was doomed to become a vampire. Was that so bad? Maybe it was…maybe it wasn't. Edward's sneer deepened.
He was now in front of her. He made to grip her arms, but Bella backed up, ripping her arms away from him. His simper of confidence disappeared. "Bella? Don't fight this."
"Too bad!" Bella said defiantly. She wasn't sure as of why she was fighting back, though. She wanted to become a vampire. Dreadfully. She wanted to live forever with Edward and be able to love him fully. And be like him. Yet…
…she didn't want it to happen like this. She wanted him to want it, not just because he was sick. She wanted it to be a happy occasion, not a forlorn occasion. She took a deep breath. "You're not going to change me. Not today, at least."
Edward frowned at her. "But you wanted to help me, earlier. This will help me greatly, Bella. Very greatly. Bella…"
Bella backed up. Edward stood where he was his arms slightly outstretched. "You wanted to help me. This will help me. Let me change you."
"No!" Bella nearly roared. "Stop it! This won't help you! Waiting out the sickness will! Don't do this, Edward!" She had tears in her eyes. "Edward! You don't want me to change! You've fought it for a year, now! Don't change me so easily!"
He lowered his hands and glared at her. "So?" he asked. "I want to change you now."
"No, you don't!" Bella sobbed. She was crying now, her tears falling away from her face and raining down to the hardwood flooring. "You don't want this! You don't! It's the sickness speaking! You can't be sick forever! Just wait it out! I know you can do it."
His lips pulled into a snarl. "Bella. Stop fighting me." Dangerous words said in a dangerous tone. At any other time, Bella would have stopped, but she couldn't. She had to return Edward to his senses. She had to! She had to! And by God, she would. If that meant knocking him upside the head, she would, but she couldn't let Edward be like this. She loved him too much. And she didn't want to be changed like this…so horribly…so disgustingly…
She took a deep breath. "Edward. I love you. You know that. But…you don't want this to happen to me. So stop saying you do! You've fought it for a whole year…return to your senses, please!" Her tone was pleading. "Please…"
Edward paused. He stared at her. "Why?" he asked quietly. "Why should I? You've been begging to be changed for this whole entire year. So…why are you fighting now?"
"Because I don't want to be changed like this!" Bella sobbed once more. "I want to be changed with you not being hungry for my blood! I want Alice standing next to me. I want you holding my hand. I want Rosalie glaring at me from the corner of the room. I don't want to…die…in a dance studio with a crazy vampire! I already had a taste of what that was like, and I don't want it to happen again!"
Edward stood still. Bella bit her lip, feeling she went too far. But then Edward spoke, tone low, his face slowly bending downward.
"'Crazy vampire?' Is that what I am?" He stared at her.
"Right now, it is!"
He looked away. "I wish you would have left when I asked you to." He suddenly brought his face forward and looked at Bella. "Go. Now. I'll be back for you when I feel better…go to Forks. Rent a car. There's a wallet in the Jeep."
Bella nodded and quickly ran out of the building, tears in her eyes. She did as Edward had told her, and she reached Forks in what seemed like no time. When she did, Alice's face hardened.
"He got sick." It wasn't a question, but Bella nodded. She looked around and saw Jasper with his head in his hands, face crestfallen.
Bella cocked her head to one side at him.
"I got Edward and Emmett sick. We must have caught it when we went hunting…" His voice trailed off.
Alice, unexpectedly, asked Bella, "Did Edward just get sick?"
"No," Bella said. "I stayed with him a bit, but he…he tried to kill me, so he told me to go."
She nodded, her eyes slightly large. "He has very good self control…"
"What?"
She sighed. "Bella? I have a feeling he was on the edge of killing you. But he held back…do you know how hard that was for him?"
"I can only imagine," she breathed.
"Yeah. He really, really loves you…" Her voice trailed off just as Jasper's had done. She mumbled something that Bella could not hear.
"What was that?" she asked, not caring that she was being nosy.
Alice turned to her and sighed. "I don't understand why he won't let us change you. You wouldn't have been in trouble if you were already a vampire…you could have stayed by his side without making him sick with desire…"
Bella swallowed slightly. "Uhm?" was all she was able to manage.
Alice's shoulders heaved and she looked away from Bella. "That's neither here nor there. We should wait for Edward now."
The hours passed slowly for Bella. She felt horrible about leaving him in such a weak state—what if he killed someone? What if he made someone into a vampire? What if?
But Bella's frantic worries were shunned away when he walked in the door, looking greatly abashed. He ran towards Bella, tears in his eyes, and hugged her. "Damn it, Bella, why didn't you leave when I told you to!?"
She folded into his chest thankfully. "Because I wanted to be with you. Like a good girlfriend."
"But…I almost killed you…" He looked towards Alice, his face suddenly angry.
"Alice! What are you thinking?"
She glared at him, and then gestured towards Bella. "Can't you see?" she hissed at him. "She loves you. She wants to be with you. Stop being so worried…I foresaw her as a vampire…just let her become one, Edward! There's no point in keeping her human. No point what so ever! Just change her already!"
Edward's face grew hard, leaving Bella in an emotional dust. "But…I almost did change her…she said she didn't want to be changed…"
Bella felt the need to defend herself then. "Under those circumstances. Edward. You know that I want to be…one of you…"
Edward scowled at her. "No! I won't change you."
"Edward? I'll change her. Right now. I swear. This is pointless and stupid. Even Carlisle thinks so."
Carlisle suddenly floated into the room, Esme following, both looking solemn. "Edward. You're not sick anymore. Change her."
"No!" he roared. "What if I lose control? What if she dies—"
"You won't lose control. And…you'll be protecting her from dieing if you change her." Esme looked at him worriedly. "Edward…we just want you to be happy. And if you can have her…forever…"
Edward looked around, seeing into all of the minds, and then glared down at Bella. "Well, Bella," he said, almost cruelly, "I guess your getting your wish now."
Carlisle moved forward, smiling weakly at Bella. "Are you ready?"
Bella blinked. Everything had happened so quickly. She was being changed. But…it was such weird circumstances…
"I think so," she responded, reaching out for Edward's hand. She grappled it for dear life. Edward's face softened as Carlisle looked up at Edward. "Edward. This has to happen. We're sorry—"
"Let me do it." Edward ripped Bella away from Carlisle. "I need to do this." Bella smiled, feeling relieved and happy that it was to be Edward who changed her. But, just as he was leaning down to bite her, he mumbled against her flesh, "I hope you don't regret this."
Searing pain revealed itself.