This one goes out to everyone who has played the original games and hates the fact that they made Cloud angsty in the spin-offs so he'd seem "familiar." Funny, I don't really recall Cloud being angsty so much as quiet...

I hate this song. I love this parody.

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VII, Kingdom Hearts, or "That's What Makes You Beautiful."


"I'm Not Emo"

As sung by Cloud Strife


Check out my psyche

I know it's scarred

But at least I am not a spoony ba-a-ard

Yes, poor Zack's dead

And Aerith, too

But in the first game, I didn't really bro-oo-od


I blame all of these stupid spin-offs

Saying I'm obsessed with Sephiroth


According to you, I slit my wrists regularly

Whining and moaning, I am my worst enemy

I'm really just a shy guy who likes to mosey

You don't kno-o-ow

You all think I'm an emo


Advent Children's really got me pissed

Nomura's awful portrayal has got me miffed

In reality, I'm as emo as Cait Sith

You don't kno-o-ow

You all think I'm an emo

Get things right, I'm not emo


So p-please let

My humor show

Like what about the bear in a m-marshmallow

I enjoy fun

And screwing off

Racing chickens instead of finding Sephiroth


Get your dumb minds out of the gutter

Can't you see I'm not a cutter


I don't believe that all clouds have a dark gray tint

I'm not emo, that honor goes to just Vincent

Why don't you go fawn over that sad sack's presence

You don't kno-o-ow

You all think I'm an emo


Did this angst first come in Kingdom Hearts

It's as if I have to sulk every time I fart

What's next, will I start to partake in tragic art?

You don't kno-o-ow

You all think I'm an emo

Get things right I'm not emo


Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah blah blah, blah, blah blah

Blah, blah blah blah, blah, blah

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah blah blah, blah, blah blah

Blah, blah blah blah, blah, blah


Because I can't be considered a tortured soul

Sure, I was mind raped, but my character has grown

Besides, once in a while, can't a guy mull?

Nooooo-oooo-oooooo

You all think I'm am emo


Why would I parade in skinny jeans?

I don't go and cry every time that Cid is mean

I'm more cheerful than my quiet demeanor seems

You don't kno-o-ow

You all think I'm an emo

Nooo-ooo-ooo

Get things right, I'm not emo

Nooo-ooo-oooo

Get things right, I'm not emo!

So...reactions? It's Equivalent Exchange: one story, one review per person. Am I right?

I wonder if One Direction realizes how many people make fun of their songs.