It is not easy living the life of a world-renowned superstar, but when you hit the point of being the Albert Einstein of the music world, it is something you must cope with. Growing up in a small town near Atlanta, Georgia, I always wanted to become a hit in the music industry like my idol, Marvin Gay. However, becoming the Greek God of music is far from easy. Somehow, I became an overnight success. It all began one night when I was hanging with my homie, X Dawgg.
"Eh, yo', Logo," said X Dawgg. "When you gonna help a brotha out and do a collaboration with me on my new mix tape?"
"I don't know how I feel about that my man. You know I ain't got none of that talent on the mic like you do maine," I quickly responded.
"C'mon holmes, just help your boy out and step into the booth and drop a few verses right quick; it's that easy," said X Dawgg staring intensely at me.
"Ok, I guess I can give it a try" I retorted.
Therefore, I walked into the booth in X Dawgg's makeshift, home studio. After about three minutes of reading my chicken scratch off a napkin, (with a syrup stain on it from Bob Evan's) I walked out with a huge grin on my face.
"Wow Logo that was something serious. Ima send this to the Record Company like I always do with all my other mixed tapes," said X Dawgg. He was hyped from my previous session in the booth.
After only two days, letters from dozens of record companies about signing with them bombarded me. After many moons of consideration, I decided there was only one logical choice, and that, was to sign with the German record company that signed David Hassellhoff.
After arriving in Germany, I immediately went to meet with the Hoff for our upcoming tour. He said that he was looking for a party so we hopped on his hot pink private jet and headed to New York. We went to a club, where we found David's close personal friends Drake, Chris Brown, and Jason Kidd. After the Hoff went to the restroom to do a line of cocaine real quick, the party was poppin'. David who was high on every drug known to man and several previously only known to dolphins before this night, also extremely drunk off his behind, yelled to me, "Logo, my dude, throw me some bubbly!"
So I did just what he said, and Hassellhoff, very uncoordinatedly, tipped the bottle of champagne, which I probably should not have thrown to him. The second it tipped his fingers, it hit Chris Brown right smack dab in the side of his noggin. I was sitting with Drake and his crew at the time. The two of us became very close and wrote and recorded seven songs that went multi-platinum that night. So, Chris stood up and yelled "Nigga, we got a problem!?" Chris must have believed that Drake threw the bottle at him in anger, which Drake of course would never do.
Drake answered, "Tuck's a Jew." Tuck was a member of Drakes posse who recently discovered his Jewish heritage and told Drake, who is also a Jew. Chris thought Drake said something dirty to him and a riot then erupted.
After escaping the club with David Hasellhoff, we headed to the airport to head back to Germany because our tour began the next day. We talked about how wild and crazy our night was on the plane. We got to our hotel and fell asleep, in separate rooms, of course because we are not gay. That is just not how we roll. I awoke the next morning to the sound of sirens. I walked into the hotel lobby and was told by my manager, X Dawgg, that David Hasselhoff had suffered an overdose on cocaine. He must have known it was coming eventually. It turned out that the Hoff was alive and well and our tour would only be postponed. After our tour ended, we became very wealthy and famous. We then signed with Young Money Cash Money Records and, as they say, the rest is history.