Disclaimer:
I do not own Naruto. It was created by and belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.
The only time I ever feel safe is when I'm alone.
I don't know why I'm like that, but I've been like it for years. I think my real problem isn't that I like being alone, even though that's true, but that I don't trust anyone. I have trust issues, big time. But I guess that's just part of my charm.
Elva set her pen down tentatively, tracing over the words she had just jotted down on the spur of the moment. She had finally made a choice, after all these years. At last she had her decision, but there was one problem. Telling Kisame.
Naturally, no one else would care. No one ever did. When Pein asked Elva what was new, there was only one answer he was looking for, and he never got it. Apparently, due to Elva being only half Uchiha, she would never be able to activate the Sharingan, something that she assumed would have disappointed her father, were he still alive. It wasn't definite that it wasn't possible for her, but Elva had no expectations.
Right. I'm useless, too. So you won't need me, Elva quickly added without another thought, biting her bottom lip. She knew she should be writing this with more care, as Kisame could draw conclusions and freak before finishing the letter, but she honestly couldn't give a shit.
At this passing thought, Elva's lips twitched upward in a smile. Sure, when she had been younger, she swore on the rare occasion when she had been genuinely upset or stressed out. She used them more casually now, in passing, and she knew it made Kisame angry. Maybe that's why she did it.
You know you don't want me around anymore, so it would be nice for you to admit it for once before I leave.
Elva felt her heart skip a beat in a sudden rush of excitement as her pen stopped abruptly at the end of the sentence. Her smile brightened for a brief moment, before it was stripped off her face as she realized all of the work ahead of her. She didn't have much more to say to Kisame – she didn't know how to tell him that she was going back to Konoha, so most of her letter was either her random thoughts, like many of her most recent ones, or sentences that made her sound like she wasn't leaving, only killing herself.
Don't try to stop me. Don't follow me. Please, just leave me alone. Once again, Elva's pen stopped, but only because she was thinking of a way to end the letter this time. After a brief moment of thought, she penned, I'm going to be in enough trouble as is. I don't need to be worrying about you finding me for the rest of my life. Fondly, Elva, and dropped her pen to the side of the paper.
"That should do it," Elva murmured under her breath in a sad attempt to convince herself that Kisame would actually listen to the letter and forget about her. She folded the letter, scribbled Kisame's name on one blank side, and dropped it face-up on her bed. Grabbing hold of her old yellow duffel bag, she set it on her bed and went for her closet, taking as many of her clothes as she could find and forcing them into the bag. Once she had packed a reasonable number of clothes, she only needed one more thing.
Her journal. After four long years, she still patiently took time out of every day to write down new events and random conversations. Things she wanted to remember, all for different reasons. Just holding it was a comfort for her. In it was every memory, every dream, everything having to do with her father, Itachi Uchiha. After Elva had gotten it packed, she slung her bag over her shoulder and headed out the door.
Elva was quick to slip through the hallways of the hideout and into the fresh air. Once outside, she hurried over to a large portion of old boulder that used to rest in front of the Akatsuki hideout. Luckily, none of the members had ever cared about cleaning up, so Elva used it to hide things. To be more exact, one thing.
"What's that?"
Kisame flinched at Elva's tone. Of course, it wasn't different from what it ever was. Dry, sarcastic. Uncaring. It made him angry, and Elva knew that. She just didn't care. "Don't be an idiot," Kisame snapped, letting his anger get the better of him for a moment. He paused, then sighed, closing his eyes. "...It's a bicycle, Elva. I thought that would be obvious."
Elva remained silent for a heavy moment, eyes narrowing from a force of habit. "...obviously," she muttered, rolling her eyes. "But why?" She eyes the bike with distaste, with it's handlebars with ribbons and pink pedals and seat. "...is this your way of coming out of the closet, Kisame?"
Kisame glared at her hard, forcing down a response. Instead, he said, "No. It's for you." Before Elva could say something else, he cut her off, "You do nothing. All of the time. You need to get outside – get some fresh air. Go out on a bike ride," he suggested, gesturing to the pink bicycle.
Elva raised an eyebrow. "But...why?" she insisted, genuinely confused for once. "My birthday was seven months ago. You already got me a present."
"No," Kisame continued, sighing. "Elva, you don't get it. You wouldn't." Elva's eyes narrowed again, but Kisame wouldn't let her talk. "Don't." Pausing again, he sighed, then blurted out, "You're depressed, Elva. How can you not see that?"
Elva was taken aback, flinching at the heavy emphasis Kisame had put on "depressed." She opened her mouth, then shut it, then opened it again. "I-I'm not—"
"Don't start that, Elva," Kisame warned. "I'm not an idiot. You think I am? I'm not as unobservant as you apparently think I am. I never see you sleep. You skip meals constantly. You hardly ever talk, except to me, and only on rare occasions, like now. I haven't seen you smile in over three-and-a-half-fucking-years. Do you realize how long that is? Do you realize that it has been almost four years since—"
"Stop it!" Elva shouted angrily, jumping to her feet. "I'm not depressed," she insisted, backing away from Kisame. "And...I don't need some weird kind of twisted...bike...therapy, either! It's not going to help, Kisame. Nothing can. My father is dead, and there's nothing you can fucking do about it."
The two stared at each other for what seemed like forever, until Kisame turned for the door. "Fine," he muttered. "Ride the damn bicycle or I'm sending you home."
At the time the thought of returning to Konoha scared Elva more than anything. Of course she rode the "damn" bicycle, and surprisingly, it helped. It really gave her something to do, but Elva pretended it helped when she was around Kisame. Luckily for her, it slowly became easier and easier to feel normal, and now she was fine most of the time. There were still times, though, when she would sink into a depression again, sometimes for days at a time.
Shaking the memory from her head, Elva quickly wheeled out the year-old pink bicycle and jumped on, starting off immediately. She had to get as much distance between her and the remaining members of Akatsuki as soon as possible. Picturing Kisame following her if she lingered too long, Elva pedaled quicker, until she couldn't see the red arch anymore.
Once Elva couldn't recognize where she was, she slowed down, but she was still listening carefully in case someone was following her. She had lost track of time – she was sure she had been biking for a steady hour or so, but she couldn't be sure. One thing was for sure. She had never biked this far or for this long before, and her legs were already screaming out in protest.
Giving in, Elva dropped her feet from the pedals to the ground, skidding to a stop. She had begun to stand up when her legs gave out, sending her falling to the ground. For a moment she grimaced, rubbing her legs, but then she stopped. Realizing how stupid she must have looked falling to the ground, she started laughing, of all things.
It was relieving, laughing at such a random thing. Before Elva knew what was happening, she was laughing at herself laughing, doubled over in laughter. Within a few minutes, she was clutching her side in pain, even though she loved it. It was, oddly enough, the most fun she'd had in a long time. Running away sure put a lot of adrenaline into someone's system.
Suddenly, though, Elva froze. What the hell was that? she wondered to herself, listening carefully. She could have sworn she heard something. A rush in the leaves next to her. She was just about to assume that whatever she had heard she had made up herself when the sound came again, only this time directly behind her. Someone had found her.
Sighing, she let the duffel bag drop off her shoulder, and she stood up. "Look, I'm sorry, Kisame," she muttered, rolling her eyes, as she turned around. "I have a right to go, though. I'm almost sixte—" She stopped, hate suddenly pulsing throughout her body. "You're not Kisame," she growled.
Anyone could detect the sudden change in Elva's attitude, but Sasuke pretended he hadn't. "You don't like me, do you?" he asked casually, folding his arms across his chest. He almost looked amused, but Elva knew he had about as much emotional capacity as Elva had when she found out Itachi had been killed. By him. There were only two options for him: calm and anger.
Just looking at Sasuke made Elva want to kill him. Not that she could, of course, but she wanted to try at the very least. She almost did at that moment, but something held her back. Instead, she forced to tone down her anger a notch, asking, "What the hell are you doing out here?" She resisted the urge to cringe when the swear slipped out.
Sasuke didn't notice, or pretended not to. "I'm protecting the border into Akatsuki, as always," he answered, frowning. "What are you doing way out here?" He glanced down at the yellow bag, then back at Elva, smirking. "Running away?" he sneered.
Elva pushed down the intense urge to hurt him. He's mocking me, she realized suddenly, flushing. "What would you do if I was?" she demanded, still glaring at her uncle.
Sasuke was silent for a moment, then glanced over his shoulder, as if he were listening for something. Then he shrugged, bent down to take hold of Elva's duffle, and handed it to her. "Good riddance," he muttered, setting her bike upright. He waited for her to get the bag over her shoulder, then rolled the bike to her. "You're just a hassle."
Elva took the handlebars roughly, scoffing at Sasuke's response. "I'm the hassle? I'm surprised Akatsuki let you tag along, with you having...you know...killed one of their best members." She smirked suddenly. "Akatsuki doesn't need you. They're just pretending that they need you so they don't have to worry about you going after somebody else." She glanced to the side, muttering, "Not that you wouldn't do that, anyway."
Sasuke raised an eyebrow, narrowing his eyes. "You are..." He trailed off, and for a split second Elva worried that she had gone too far, when he said, "...exceedingly childish." When Elva stared at him in unexpected surprise, Sasuke frowned. "What, you actually thought I saw you as mature? Please. Be realistic."
Elva was about to come up with another response, when she rolled her eyes. No matter what I say, he'll use it against me, she muttered to herself ruefully. I swear, one day I'm going to fucking kill him!
"Is that a threat or a promise?" Sasuke suddenly asked, jerking Elva out of her thoughts. She was silent for a moment, confused by his outburst, when a look of dread spread across her face. Sasuke sighed, answering her unasked question. "Yes, you were talking out loud."
Elva glared at him for a heavy moment, squeezing the handlebars of the bike as tightly as she could without breaking her hand. She wanted so badly to do something to him, to break his nose, to kick him between the legs, to do something! Instead, she frowned, feigning interest as Sasuke looked over his shoulder again. "Do you hear something?"
"What, no rude comment?" Sasuke muttered sarcastically, before looking at Elva. "Did you really think you'd get far without that blue freak realizing you'd left? Really, Elva, he's obsessed with you," he said, watching her as if he actually wanted a response to that.
"...Kisame?" Elva asked in disbelief, not really needing the confirmation from Sasuke. "I thought he'd be asleep." Apparently not, she answered herself. "Okay, well...when is he going to be here?" As if to answer her question, she heard a sudden rustling in the trees, not too far off. She swore under her breath, jumping on the bicycle and starting off as fast as she could. "Stall for me, please!" she shouted over her shoulder at Sasuke.
She didn't get an answer.
Author's Note:
Valbino Aw, thanks! I love you, too, along with everyone else! But sorry for making you feel like crying. It was hard writing a chapter with Itachi...well...being dead in it and all. Thank you so much for reading my first-ever story...even though it was written and re-written many, many times. I'm finished now, I swear!
The Commander Yeah, while I was writing this I couldn't stop myself from thinking, "Wow, I'm really horrible to Elva, aren't I?" I mean...I feel so bad for her! But thanks for reading this, and hopefully, since you seemed interested in there being a sequel, you'll read that too?? Haha, yeah, I'm just a little desperate for readers...
Sasori-Chibi Sorry for making you cry!! I'm a baby, so I was tearing up while I wrote this, but sorry for making you cry. Thanks a bunch for reading this fanfic – it really means a lot to me that you took the time!
AliKatNyah Thanks! I really appreciated your comments. I wish I could bring Itachi back to life, but I can't...he was one of my favorite characters in the show (if I haven't already mentioned that in an Author's Note, lol, which I probably have). Anyway, thank you so much for reading my story!
JenKonoha Haha, thanks, it's good to be back. Although, I must ask...did you mean "welcome back" as in "welcome-back-it's-been-a-long-time-since-there's-been-a-new-chapter" or "welcome-back-your-story's-good-again?" ...or some other way? I was just confused, lol. But thanks so terribly much for reading this!
Just so y'all know, I'm going to post an extra chapter in Good Things Aren't Meant to Last just saying that this story is out, a link to it, it's name, etc. ...actually, right now I'm writing this A/N before I've started the first chapter...so I really have no idea how the first chapter's going to go...nor do I know what the new story is going to be named. Haha. This'll be interesting.
...I have no idea why I brought Sasuke into this already. But...eh...did you hate it? Just say so if you did, PLEASE. Also...if you don't get why Sasuke's kinda...working for Akatsuki, I hope it makes sense. I mean...it's in the manga, in the second-to-most-recent chapter. They were wearing Akatsuki robes...so I kinda assumed...yeah.
Wondering why the ending chapter of GTAMTL and the title of this story are the same? Well...I just thought it'd be cool to have them be the same. Plus, I couldn't think of another name, so...yeah. LEAVE MEH ALONE.
Anyways, PLEASE REVIEW!
Remember, I love you all!!
-Meri Umeko-