STANDARD DISCLAIMERS APPLY: I do not own 'Inuyasha'.
Simple
by
Anna Iram.
Simple. Nothing ever is simple. I would like to believe that once my life was simple, but the knowledge of things I had at the time made tests, fights between friends and the occasional argument with any one of my relatives seem like the end of the world.
In retrospect, everything before I turned fifteen used to be so easy that I can't help but feel frustrated at all the opportunities I let pass me by and all the comforts that I took for granted.
Of course, no one lives life with the luxury of hindsight at present-time: it would just be all too simple and, as I mentioned before, nothing ever is.
Foresight, I'm sure, would have guarded Sango's family, would have prevented Kohaku's situation and the sadness that she bravely fends off every day: it would all have been so simple.
Foresight would have saved Miroku from the curse that befell his family; his ancestor, undoubtedly, would have thought twice before provoking Naraku's ire. As simply as that, the expiration date of sorts that Miroku valiantly wears on the palm of his hand like a bar code would never have been.
Foresight could very well have been the greatest ally Shippo's parents could have had; foreseeing the menace the Thunder Brothers represented would have saved their lives and one orphan's tragic tale: as simple as 1,2,3…
Foresight could have dispelled a betrayal that never was, Onigumo would have never had the chance to offer his soul to darkness and Inuyasha and Kikyou would have been able to live out their lives together, as it should have always been: the unweaving of this particular tapestry of love, lies and deceit terrifying in its utter simplicity.
Foresight… it may or may not have influenced my decision to chase after Buyo on that fated day: so much for the perks of clairvoyance!
I guess, in the long run, not even prescience could have helped me: simplicity is just not a factor in the complicated equation that is my life as Kagome Higurashi, shard-detector, loyal friend, surrogate mother-figure, struggling junior high student and untrained miko extraordinaire!
Juggling between two entirely different time periods, putting my life on the line everyday and studying for killer math tests is, sometimes, more than I think I can take. Never mind what I think though, apparently I can take those responsibilities on and so much more without giving in to sudden urges of plopping down and wasting away. It would be so very simple to do just that, but not very efficient or beneficial for the future of the world as we know it.
That's another term that went under revision after my wild adventures in the past started: 'the end of the world'.
I'm standing on the brink of the end of the world now; everyday on the other side of the well is like the apocalypse waiting to happen. As time goes by, the foreboding tension and anticipation of this journey's culmination brings us all closer to the edge of a very uncertain outcome. There is not an ounce of simplicity to our quest, even if we try to walk with a light gait and refuse to forego hope.
I guess that the word 'simple' is no longer part of my vocabulary.
And yet… my feelings, my hopes, my dreams; they do seem so very simple. Perhaps their realization and the situations that surround them convolute my perception of them, but that's the way contingencies work; what is out of one's hands tends to magnify problems, as opposed to simplifying them.
Still, I believe that if I study hard enough, I'll be able to get into high-school. I'm positive that if we all do our best and continue fighting for what is right, we, the rag-tag team that seeks the shikon shards and the destruction of the greatest threat the world has seen – one that ironically enough wears a baboon pelt and a little concealer – shall prevail and win the final battle, a decisive moment in all our lives that inches ever closer as the sun continues to rise above this land day after day.
I know that, no matter what, we will all find a way for happiness to triumph over any adversity or trials.
And I know my heart. I know it beats a little faster every time Inuyasha draws near and that it cries out a little louder every time he is injured. I know it breaks into pieces every time he runs after his former love and that it reassembles itself when he comes back to me.
I know my heart, I know its rhythm, I know its silent whispers and apologetic pleas. I know that my heart yearns for the love of a hanyou that remained pinned to the Goshinbuko for fifty years and that still pines over events that he could not control and the love of a woman whose hatred consumes both their souls.
I know that I am in love with an arrogant, violent jerk that lives five hundred years in the past and that my feelings for him cannot help but grow stronger with every passing day in which he continues to prove my first impression of him completely wrong.
I love the Inuyasha that hides his true emotions behind a grumpy mask and calls me names, whether he be human, hanyou, or full raging youkai.
I am aware that this all sounds very complicated, but it is actually quite simple: I can be who I need to and want to be, we will do that which we must and succeed and I, Kagome Higurashi, love Inuyasha.
Nothing is ever simple at first glance, but digging a little deeper, going beyond the multiple façades that throw us off course and finding the truth within our hearts reveals the undeniable: our true desires are simple, for they just ARE.
My name is Kagome Higurashi.
I live in the Sunset Shrine.
I am a junior-high student.
I travel through time.
I have wonderful friends.
I am on an important mission.
Naraku will be defeated.
The Shikon no Tama will be whole again.
I love Inuyasha.
No matter what choice he makes, I will remain by Inuyasha's side if he lets me.
I will not allow myself to forget how to smile.
These are my truths and they are rather simple once I stop overanalyzing them.
Nothing is ever simple for anyone; I guess that means that maybe we forget that simple doesn't always mean easy.
Simple also means sincere: I have the privilege to trek around Japan five hundred years in the past with a bunch of the most honest people I know – except for when Miruko goes into con-artist mode or Shippo's chocoholic withdrawal symptoms kick in.
That which is simple is not only that which is effortless, but that which has no need for additions or modifications; I know my true will and it is based on mere affirmations that are pretty solid. I know what I want, I know how I feel and, even if the world around me spins out of control sometimes, making me wish for a crystal ball that actually works so I can plan my next move without bruising as easily, one thing shall always remain true: it is my life, I cannot dwell in the past or think too far ahead in the future; I must live in the now and hold on to my beliefs, keep the faith and smile.
If simple, if complicated, if hesitant, if certain, the fact remains: I am Kagome Higurashi and, right now, I am alive, therefore, I must live, I must love and I must smile.
Tomorrow is only a day away but it too is a million happenings in the making: it's as simple as that.
