"I hope no one's hurt," thought Batgirl anxiously, noticing the ambulance parked in front of a fire hydrant along one of Gotham City's many busy streets. "However, its lights aren't flashing and I don't see any activity, so it's probably nothing."
The caped crime fighter was dressed in her distinctive bat costume, gray with black, gold and violet-blue elements, which only revealed her lower face and her long, fiery red hair. The angry grumbling of a loud engine interrupted her speculation as a motorcycle screeched to a stop beside her.
"Hey, you Batgirl?"
"The one and only," she replied cheerfully.
"Got a delivery for you," the motorcycle driver announced, trying to hand her a large yellow envelope with a bulge near the bottom.
"Don't deliverymen usually wear uniforms?" asked Batgirl, taking a step back. In fact, his dirty, dark, wool cap, turtleneck sweater, and cargo pants made him look more like one of the henchmen who served the numerous super villains who populated Gotham City than anything else. "And aren't you supposed to deliver packages to an address, not just drive up to people in the street?"
"Look, sister, I was just told to give this to you, so here it is. If you don't want it, that's fine." He leaned over and placed the package on the sidewalk near Batgirl. With a rattling roar, he swerved back into traffic and was lost to view.
"I wonder what this is all about?" Batgirl carefully picked up the envelope, noticing there was no return address and that it was simply addressed to bBatgirl/b, written in large firm letters with a black magic marker. Suddenly it started vibrating, as from within a shrill electronic tone beeped insistently.
"Oh, the heck with caution," muttered Batgirl, tearing the envelope open to discover a purple cell phone, a very advanced model from its look. "Um, hello?" she answered, flipping it open.
"Good afternoon, Batgirl," replied Two Face. The screen showed the right half of his face, although with a snarl he moved his phone so that suddenly the horribly disfigured left half came into view. "Although I shouldn't be wishing you a good afternoon after the way you and Catwoman made a mess of my plans earlier today, you meddling battleaxe. You nosy, interfering…"
"Look, if you just called to yell at me then I'm hanging up," countered Batgirl.
"No, no, don't do that, there's… someone here who wants to talk to you." The screen went blurry for a moment, and then, as Batgirl gave a gasp of surprise, focused in on Catwoman, tied to a wooden chair!
She wore her distinctive gray catsuit, with long black boots and gloves, a black mask and a gold belt. She was struggling energetically against the ropes that tied her arms and legs to the chair as she mewed into the broad red bandana tied over her mouth. From the indistinct noises that was all she could make, Batgirl quickly realized Catwoman must also have packing in her mouth and tape keeping her lips shut under the bandana.
"Cat, are you okay?" Batgirl knew it was useless to ask but still felt compelled to do so.
"She's trying to warn you that it's a trap," explained Two Face, the screen still showing Catwoman who was desperately trying to communicate with Batgirl, despite the gag. "Although not quite in the way you might think… hey! None of that, now!" he ordered, noticing that Batgirl was reaching for her own cell phone, pressing the button that would get her into contact with Batman. To her consternation, though, it rang without receiving a live response.
Just as she was about to leave a message on his voicemail she heard a faint hissing sound coming from the cell phone Two Face had sent her. A barely perceptible gray smoke, smelling sickly sour, poured out. "Care…less…," she managed to say, both devices falling from her hands as she slumped onto the sidewalk.
"Something's happened to Batgirl!" exclaimed an onlooker, awkwardly coming to her side. "Call 911!" yelled another person. "Does anyone here know CPR?"
"Stand back please, we need room to operate!" Two men sprang out of the parked ambulance, wheeling a gurney. In all the excitement, no one noticed they weren't wearing paramedic uniforms, but rather were dressed in dirty, dark, wool caps, turtleneck sweaters, and cargo pants. "Please stand back! We have everything under control!" one of them announced, strapping Batgirl into the gurney.
"It's lucky that ambulance happened to be right here!" exclaimed the onlooker who had first rushed to Batgirl's side. He watched Batgirl being loaded into the ambulance. The flashing lights and siren started up as the emergency vehicle sped away. "I'm so glad to see she's in such good hands!"
___
"Mpfff," said Catwoman as she watched Batgirl slowly regain consciousness. She had tried to warn her about the cell phone! Catwoman had only been able to watch helplessly as Batgirl had been dragged into a chair next to hers, and then bound and gagged much as Catwoman was, a blue bandana tied over the tape sealing Batgirl's mouth shut.
The ropes were not numerous, but they were strategically placed and tied efficiently, so Catwoman had realized she was not going to be able to wriggle loose before Two Face completed whatever it was he had in mind.
"Mpfff," said Batgirl weakly, looking sadly over at Catwoman and then all around. Her surroundings did not reveal much; she was in a large room with no windows. Exposed pipes and heating ducts suggested to her that she was in a basement of one of the numerous empty buildings in Gotham City. Far off to one side sat the motorcycle driver who had delivered the cell phone, along with two companions who looked very like him, playing a silent card game. Turning her head, she noticed Two Face walking towards her.
"Wakey, wakey," he ordered, waving a small bottle under her nose.
"Mpfff," Batgirl protested furiously. She was already awake, and the noxious fumes from the bottle were so overwhelming they almost produced the opposite of this intended effect, nearly causing her to swoon again.
"There's no point in glaring at me like that." Two Face capped the bottle and placed it in his jacket pocket. "Believe me, if looks could kill, your partner would have finished me off long before you got here."
"Mpfff," agreed Catwoman with feeling.
"Here, there's something you need to see." Two Face placed the palm of his left hand under Batgirl's chin, causing her to shudder at his touch. He tilted her face backwards so she stared straight up at the ceiling, her eyes opening wide with alarm.
Suspended overhead was an enormous block of concrete, much larger than the space taken by Batgirl and Catwoman. A thick rope circled it numerous times, lengthwise and widthwise, before running up to the ceiling. It then circled around a hook and ran diagonally down towards the floor, its end looped and tied securely around a metal safety pole a few feet away. An old combination safe, its door open, stood next to the pole.
"MPFFF!" exclaimed Batgirl in horror, struggling desperately.
"Cecil. Cecil!" yelled Two Face, causing one of his henchmen to spring up from his card game and come tottering over. "Grab a candle from the storeroom!"
"Whatcha want it for, boss?" asked Cecil.
A snarl escaped Two Face's mouth as he flipped the gold coin he always carried up into the air. It came down with the plain side up, so, with a sigh, he smoothed away his angry features and placed a friendly arm around Cecil's shoulders. "Well, now, Cecil, the sooner you get that candle the sooner you'll find out, right?"
"Um, right, boss," agreed Cecil, slinking away.
"It's impossible to get good help these days," complained Two Face, talking to Catwoman. "After my… I mean, when I first got into the business, no henchman ever dared question one of my orders. Now it's all, 'Why, boss?' this and that. I tell you, people are changing for the worse."
"Maybe it's not everyone else who's changed; maybe it's you," suggested Batgirl. Not that she could form even one coherent word, but she just couldn't keep silent.
"You got something to contribute to this conversation, missy?" snarled Two Face. "Now you're discovering what that gag is for."
"Here you go boss, one of them candles you asked for," announced Cecil, huffing up.
A flick of a match lit the candle. Two Face waited a moment for a small amount of wax to melt off and drip onto the top of the safe before pressing the candle firmly down, so that the flame burned into the rope holding the block of concrete.
"Gee, boss, is that itty-bitty little fire really going to be strong enough to burn such a thick rope?" asked another of the henchmen as he came over.
"Well, Nigel, I really do not know," confessed Two Face. "You see, I'm leaving their fate entirely to chance. If, after the candle burns low, the rope is still intact, I'll take it as a sign it's not meant to be. We'll untie them from their chairs and leave them loosely bound in a nearby vacant lot, where they should be able to get free with a bit of work.
"If, however, the flame is sufficient to burn the rope… well, I don't really have to explain what will happen then, now do I?"
"MPFFF!" screamed Batgirl, struggling wildly. Catwoman was silent, but still trying to work loose of her ropes. Neither was making any noticeable progress, however.
"But if I were a betting man," continued Two Face, "I'd put my money on the rope burning. You see, I stacked the deck in my favor, so to speak, by applying a liberal amount of grease on that stretch of rope. In the meantime, let's not worry about them. I believe I'll join you lads in your poker game."
___
Batgirl did not place much hope on the outcome being that the rope would not burn. She had to get free somehow. However, her efforts so far did not make her feel to optimistic, and, after all, Catwoman had been tied up for much longer than she had, and yet had not managed to get free. The ropes binding the two of them were well placed and tied tightly, the knots well out of range of their hands.
As they struggled, the chairs wobbled slightly, but remained upright. Batgirl tried jerking her body and pushing down on the floor with the toes of her boots, but her chair did not budge one inch. It seemed Two Face had taken the precaution of nailing the ends of the chair legs to the floor. She and Catwoman were hopelessly trapped.
She looked over at the burning candle. The rope immediately above the flame was smoking lightly, due to the grease, she supposed. She had to act fast, but what could she do?
"Hey, boss, I think that rope's going to burn through!" announced the third henchman.
"I do believe you're right, Charles," agreed Two Face. "Well, that'll be two less thorns in my side, then!"
There was a soft snap as the weakened rope suddenly broke. The end snaked upward. Batgirl closed her eyes, realizing she had less than a second left before the block crashed down upon her!
___
Batgirl's rapid heartbeats thundered in her ears. Although they were coming very fast, after about ten or twelve she realized more than enough time had passed and that the block had not fallen. She cautiously opened her eyes.
A scene of pandemonium greeted her. A few feet away stood Batman, a thin wire ending in a tiny grappling hook was extended from one wrist, holding the frayed end of the rope. He was pulling furiously, wrapping the wire around the safety pole, while a livid Two Face stormed towards him. Nearby, Robin was busy fighting the three henchmen, Cecil, Nigel, and Charles.
"I received an interrupted voicemail from Batgirl," explained Batman, securing the wire. "A report said she was taken away by an ambulance. Another report said an ambulance delivered an unidentified patient to the supposedly unoccupied Graystone building, rather than to a hospital. Rather peculiar, don't you think?"
"Very clever," agreed Two Face coldly, drawing a knife. The super villain deftly sliced the thick rope, causing the concrete block to start falling again.
"MPFFF!" screamed Batgirl, but she kept her eyes open to see Batman lunge forward, grabbing the end of the rope with both hands. He pulled with all his might, the block slowly inching upwards again. Batgirl looked up anxiously, afraid the ropes supporting the block might come loose with all the strain. A couple tense minutes passed before Batman managed to tie the rope around the safety pole, although by then Two Face had long disappeared.
"Everybody, hands up!" ordered a new voice. Several uniformed Gotham City police officers burst into the room, followed by an overweight man in a rumpled trench coat.
"Detective Harvey Bullock," purred Catwoman. She could talk finally, as Batman had removed her gag. "On the scene of the crime, two steps behind everyone else, as always."
"Catwoman!" he replied. "I've got a few questions for you once we finish with this. Mrs. Clark reported this morning that an intruder made off with some of her jewels while she slept, choosing the most expensive items, leaving the cheap and imitation pieces behind. Yet the security discs from last night are all blank. It seems the computers controlling her security cameras managed to catch a particularly nasty virus." He waved a stubby finger at her. "Don't even think about going anywhere until we get all this hashed out."
"Do I look as though I can go anywhere?" she replied, peering down at the ropes binding her to the chair. Batman got busy, using a knife to cut her free.
The uniformed police officers were handcuffing the three henchmen, so Robin came over and untied Batgirl. "Thank you, Robin," she said. "Look at Batman kissing Catwoman, so passionately! She's the only woman who ever really interested him."
"They sure are going at it," agreed Robin enviously.
"That's because he saved her life."
"Yeah, well, I helped, by keeping those thugs at bay," said Robin hopefully. "And that saved your life, too."
"Indeed you did, and don't think I'm not grateful," agreed Batgirl, giving him a hearty handshake. "Excellent work, Boy Wonder."
"Umm, you're welcome," mumbled Robin.
"It's too bad you let Two Face get away, Batman," observed Harvey Bullock. "Pretty careless of you, in my opinion. But at least everything else here wrapped up nicely. Now, where's Catwoman?"
"Back into the shadows," answered Batman simply.
"I thought I told her to stay here; I had some questions for her!" said Harvey Bullock angrily. "How did she get past my men, anyhow?" He chomped down on the toothpick in his teeth. "You know I wanted to talk to her, Batman. Why did you let her go?"
"No one can keep The Cat if she doesn't want to stay," explained Batman simply.
Harvey Bullock looked as though he had something he wanted to say about that, but his cell phone interrupted him. "What?!" he shouted into the device. "A daring holdup at Gotham Bank and Trust? I'll be right over.
"Take those perps downtown, I've got another call," he told the uniformed police officers, hurrying back up the stairs.
"Come, Robin, duty calls," intoned Batman emotionlessly.
"Me, too!" chimed in Batgirl as she followed the pair. It looked as though this was going to be another busy day for her.