A/N: Ok, well it's been a long time since I've posted anything on this site, and this is the first time I've posted anything here that wasn't Harry Potter. I hope you all find this funny, I tried real hard to make it funny.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of it.

Light was in hell. No not literally, after writing for the first time in his death note that wasn't possible. But he was most defiantly living in his own twisted version of the place. His home was not a place fit for a god like Kira, it was not fit for any sane person at all. It was a horrible place that not even the bravest of men would dare travel if they knew of the horrors they would face there. Yes this was hell at its finest.

"Liigghhht!!" One of hells demons sang as she bounced into the living room. She immediately attached her evil hands to his neck. "I haven't seen you all day! How was work? My photo shoot went well. But I was soooo bored, it's always, sit here, pose like this, change your outfit, pose some more. And all I wanted to do was see you. I missed you so much; I don't like being away from you because I love you so much! Did you miss Misa?"

Light was amazed that the blonde hadn't passed out from lack of air. Actually he wished that she had, maybe then he could get some peace and quiet for once. "That's nice Misa." Not that he really cared; he was too busy wondering if he had any more sleeping pills left. He could just slip a few into her drink tonight and…

"LIGHT!" Misa wailed. "You didn't even answer my question? I want to know that you missed me even more than I missed you. Even thought that's not possible because I missed you so much I never thought I'd make threw the whole day without you with me." She clung to his neck even tighter, making it had for him to breath.

"Maybe I'll pass out.' Light thought. 'It wouldn't be so bad; at least I wouldn't have to deal with her for a couple of hours.' "Sure Misa, I did." No, he had too much work to get done tonight to pass out; he'd just have to pray there were more sleeping pills. All of a sudden a horrible burning smell reached Light's nose, followed be the sound of the smoke detector going off.

Misa shrieked and let go of him. "Oh no! Your supper!" She cried and ran off into the kitchen.

Light sighed and took a seat on the couch of hell; he had named it this after Misa had made him hold her for five hours after sex on it. Which he had only agreed to after three hours of her crying about how they never did, and he must not love her. He placed his briefcase beside him and tried to find a moment to relax. He had just closed his eyes intent on his thoughts of another good day of misleading the task force when he felt someone's eyes on him. Reluctantly he opened his opened his eyes and came face to face with Ryuk who was mere inches from his nose. Startled, Light jumped back causing himself to fall onto the floor, painfully.

"What are you doing down there Light?" Ryuk asked him as he floated over.

Light scowled and rubbed his head. "I'm down here because someone scared the hell out of me!"

Ryuk chuckled. "Did you go to the store on your way home? We're all out of apples again."

Light sat up quick. "What do you mean we're out of apples! I just bought you a whole shit load of apples yesterday!" He yelled.

"I was hungry!" The shinigami whined. "I needed them, I was getting withdrawals, and you know what happens when I get withdrawals!"

"Why did you have to eat them all? Can't you pace yourself or something? Do you know how much money I'm spending on apples a month?" Light was prepared to continue lecturing the apple addict farther but a scream from the kitchen stopped him.

"OH MY GOD IT'S ON FIRE!" Misa screamed.

Light jumped up off the floor and ran into the kitchen before she set the whole house on fire. "Misa, where is it?' He could hardly see anything through the black smoke engulfing the whole room. He grabbed the fire extinguisher from next to the door, not knowing where the fire was he was forced to spray in the general direction of the oven. Coughing, he opened the window and flicked on the exhaust fan. Slowly the room cleared and reveled suppers now ruined stir-fry. "Why didn't you turn it off when it started smoking?" He seethed at Misa.

But the blonde wasn't listening to a word of it; she was sitting in the corner crying. "What will we have for supper now? I tried to make you a nice meal and now we won't have one to eat, and Matsu is coming over for supper tonight and we'll have nothing to feed him and hell think that we're terrible hosts. And all that white stuff to put out the fire ruined my nice outfit and I'll have to change now, and I picked out this outfit special for you!"

"Misa," Light coughed. "Will you please shut up for five seconds! Wait why the hell is Matsuda coming over here? I'm not feeding him he can eat at his own house!"

"But Light we never spend any nice time with our friends! We never do anything fun!" She wailed, attaching herself to his leg.

"I think I'm getting a migraine." Light pinched the bridge of his nose.

CRASH!!

"What the hell was that?" Light yelled, making his way in to the living room, Misa still attached to his leg.

Ryuk was in the middle of the room, in a full handstand, bouncing up and down. "Light I need apples, the withdrawals are starting!"

"I'm not getting you any more apples! What did you break?" He surveyed the room for damage.

"Huh?" The shinigami asked through twitching spasms. "Oh just that lamp over there!"

Light looked at that lamp, his favorite lamp, of course. "Misa could you just clean it up for me, I need to go get the junkie some apples."

"But Light, I need to change before Matsu gets here. And I still need to find something for us to eat!" She cried, now soaking his pant leg.

"I don't even want him over here just call him and…."

"Knock, knock. Your door was unlocked so I just let myself in." Matsuda strolled through the door as if on cue. "Hey is something burning? I brought over a pie for dessert, I hope you like apple." He smiled completely unaware as to what he had just walked in on.

"APPLE!" Ryuk screamed and dashed towards Matsuda, who of course couldn't see him and therefore couldn't move out of the way in time. So of course he was knocked of his feet by a seemingly invisible force that took his pie.

"What the?" He questioned, looking dazed. "Hey, is that pie eating itself?"

Light pried Misa off his leg. "I'll be sleeping; if you need anything don't wake me." And he went off to the bathroom in search of the sleeping pills.

DNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDNDN

Somewhere in another realm far away, one Light would never have the pleasure of seeing, crouched a man watching the whole scene. He chuckled and took another bite of his cheesecake.

"Now that is justice."

A/N: Just as a note, I really do like Misa and I don't think she's this whiney or stupid, I just love the idea of her and Ryuk driving Light nuts. Thanks for reading!