Draco Malfoy and the Spectacles of Doom
By; Alanna Riddle (a.k.a. Slytherinkid07)
* * * *
Draco Lucius Mafloy was pure evil. There was no denying it. He ate cow meat, sneered at cute fluffy bunny rabbits, and occasionally walked on the wrong side of the hallway. Oh yeah, he was a rebel.
Right now, the Slytherin Rebel was sneaking out of the Potion's classroom with his henchmen, Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle. The three were planning on exploring the castle to find new secret passage ways for their very own evil purposes.
Getting out of Snape's class turned out to be a very tricky task. The plan was for Crabbe to drop a dungbomb in Millicent Bullstrode's bag. That would distract Snape and the three would craw under the desks and chairs until they reached the door and successfully make their way out.
Crabbe had slipped the dungbomb into the beefy girl's possession, as planed, and very obviously yelled out the activation word to set it off. Nothing had happened; the dungbomb turned out to be a dud, much like Crabbe himself, and it didn't go off. What did end up happening was a room full of confused sixth year boys and girls all staring up at Crabbe, for he had screamed out the word "monkey."
"What about your monkey, Mr. Crabbe?" a silky baritone had questioned. That, of course, had been Professor Snape.
There was a pregnant pause; Snape scratched his head and wiped the grease off on a third year's essay.
Draco thought Snape looked especially greasy at that moment, temporarily forgetting to help Goyle, whom had gotten stuck underneath a chair, and he was about to comment about it when Crabbe finally answered.
"Nothing, Sir. I was just saying to Potter here," he pointed to the messy haired Gryffindork at his left, "that my monkey… er… my monkey needed to be spanked."
Every Mudblood and Half-blood in the room started snickering loudly at Crabbe's reply. Potter had turned a sickly green and was backing away from Crabbe hurriedly.
Draco, along with his fellow Slytherins, didn't get it. Stupid muggle lovers; what were they laughing at? Crabbe's familiar, which was in fact a chimpanzee named Chunky had been behaving especially badly all week. Draco and Goyle had been telling him that Chunky needed to be disciplined, but Crabbe had flat out refused; every Snake knew that he was a very strong activist and believed in Animal Rights. He was even the Mudblood Granger's silent partner in 'spooh' or whatever that house elf thing was.
"S.P.E.W. Draco, not spooh!" Crabbe grunted at him.
Weird how he knew what Draco had been thinking.
"Well, Mr. Crabbe. Your monkey has been particularly active the past few weeks. I will allow you and two friends to go spank it. It's about time you took matters into your own hands. I do not wish a repeat of last Thursday night, when it was bobbing around in my bedroom." Snape snarled.
Oh, the Monkey/Snape Incident was disastrous. Draco cringed at the memory. Poor Snape, he must have been traumatized.
"Yes Sir, will do. Draco, Greg, come with?"
And that is how the three ended up outside of the Potion's classroom, Goyle still stuck with a chair on his back.
"First stop, infirmary!"
* * * *
A/N: This will be a short little ficlet, about three chapters long. The plot will be coming into play next chapter, when Draco finds Harry Potter's glasses. Heh. Review!
Disclaimer: I don't own nada.