Because Blair Waldorf hates Brooklyn.
It started during the months when they broke up and Nate Archibald re-met Carter Baizen and spent days, weeks, months playing in the kiddie pool in Brooklyn's backyard, keeping it in the family- because even Blair could see all the way over in the UES that before her own Prince Charming got in the way Vanessa and Little J were practically sisters.
When he left her to spend too much time away from the UES, trying to convince himself he didn't need his family's 'dirty' money (Though why he cared where his father's half of his parents fortune came from when he had a Van der Bilt as a mother, Blair will never know), and that juggling Blair then Jenny then Vanessa then Jenny then Blair, then back again, was something anybody could do, not just somebody with a face and $600 wallet like his.
No, it started back when Serena Van der Woodsen had spent a good portion of her life dancing on tables in seedy bars, and Blair had spent a good portion of her own trying to keep Gossip Girl unaware, and her best friend out of rehab.
Because Serena could lighten a room with just a laugh, and a flip of perfect blonde hair, and was the first of her kind to ever parade around with a boy like Dan Humphrey without any lasting consequences, and dammit Blair wanted that. Not the Dan Humphrey part of the equation (God no) but the ability to not fail in the eyes of the world no matter what she did or who she did or where she did it.
No it started when she first decided she loved Chuck Fucking Bass.
Because if she was honest (to herself, if nobody else) she knew him better than she knew Nate or Serena, and she was practically an index on facts about those two (Serena said her favorite colour was green because it made her eyes pop, but it was really yellow like the Labrador she'd had for a week before Lily made her give it away, and Nate's favorite colour was blue because they were the colour of Serena's eyes but if you asked Blair she'd tell you he liked both blue and green equally, one for Serena's eyes and the other for making the eyes just a little bit brighter), though again, if she was honest she'd tell you Bass could probably give her a run for her money, and win, no doubt in the game of know-your-friends.
It started when they'd gone past the playful banter into the deep, dark secrets they hid from everybody but each other and Blair found out Chuck Bass was actually pickier than his name insinuated.
He'd had girls and women and ladies and even boys, but they all had that certain something. A spark, a darkness, something. Because she knew he went after a certain type of fuck, though admittedly it was a type to be found in every city around the world. From the UES to Tokyo to Amsterdam to Brooklyn.
Because Blair was scared (terrified) that Chuck Bass will ride his limo over the pond and find a girl and never come back.
She was scared he'd forget he was Chuck Bass ("I'm not Chuck Bass without you.") and that she was Blair Waldorf, and that he'd fake his name, turn into a commoner with a last name like Prince (because she knew that was about as common as Chuck Bass could get), but because Blair had had her Prince and her Devil, and at one point both at the same time. But she wasn't Serena, and she couldn't have a commoner as a consort even if she wanted too.
She was terrified Chuck Bass would like what he saw over in Brooklyn and find a beautiful girl who wasn't as rich or as poised or perfect, (as flawed, bitchy, ruined, cruel, lonely, horribly lonely) and fall in love and be happy without her. Because it took Chuck almost three years to say those three words, eight letters, and while she'd waited for him to finally say it, she'd only ever grown more sure of her love for him, and each time he'd left her, she'd ordered her favorite macaroons and had spent hours with Cary Grant and Audrey Hepburn and her fingers down her throat in her seventy thousand dollar plus bathroom.
Because when she thought of Chuck Fucking Bass (which was often and during prolongued amounts of time) she remembered that he'd gone over the river and played in the pool just as much as Nate and Serena had (though his pool was a lot bigger and possibly jewel encrusted) and what was she if her best friend and all her boyfriends liked leaving her for people like Jenny and Dan Humphrey and Vanessa What's-Her-Name?
Because Nate and Serena and Chuck were the three quarters of the Non-Judging Breakfast Club who could possibly (maybe, if they were forced) be perfectly content over in Brooklyn without her (because there's no way she'd ever go near the place unless it was to make Jenny Humphrey cry or find her drunken best friends and bring them home, back to the Upper East Side where they belonged, where her money and her clothes and her headbands meant something)
So yeah, Blair Waldorf hates Brooklyn.