A/N: All right, folks, nomination for the Orion Awards only remains open for another twelve days.
In honour of the occasion, I have written this very silly filk, whose main purpose is to remind you all to nominate. Everyone has a few Fowl!fics in their favourites list – come along and nominate them for an Orion, and give those good authors the recognition they deserve!
(Links are on my author biography, or if you like, just make a suggestion in a review, or email me, and I'll fill out the nomination for you with absolutely zero hassle for you.)
The Twelve Days of Nomination: Artemis Fowl (Book 1)
On the first day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
A genius who thinks criminally!
On the second day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the third day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Three loyal Butlers, (1)
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the fourth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
A four-foot kidnapped elf, (2)
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the fifth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the sixth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the seventh day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Seven complaints to Mummy,
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the eighth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Eight puerile fart jokes,
Seven complaints to Mummy,
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the ninth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Nine centaur wise-cracks,
Eight puerile fart jokes,
Seven complaints to Mummy,
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the tenth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
A ten-foot troll rampaging,
Nine centaur wise-cracks,
Eight puerile fart jokes,
Seven complaints to Mummy,
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the eleventh day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
A crazy mother, healed now,
A ten-foot troll rampaging,
Nine centaur wise-cracks,
Eight puerile fart jokes,
Seven complaints to Mummy,
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
On the twelfth day of reading, Colfer gave to me:
Twelve hundred gold bars!
A crazy mother, healed now,
A ten-foot troll rampaging,
Nine centaur wise-cracks,
Eight puerile fart jokes,
Seven complaints to Mummy,
Six in LEPretrieval,
Five red-faced roars!
A four-foot kidnapped elf,
Three loyal Butlers,
A bribed and blackmailed sprite,
And a genius who thinks criminally!
Notes:
(1) Including The Major, who died on the Fowl Star
(2) Er… rounding up.