I was supposed to be writing chapter 6 of Sins of the Father, but suddenly out of nowhere, this came to me. So here it is.

Anesthetic

Summary: An alternate surgery scene from Something Nice Back Home. What if they didn't have the chloroform? What if Jack had to stay awake during the surgery not because he wanted to but because he had no choice? I honestly have no idea why I want to put my baby through so much pain, I honestly don't.

"I'm sorry, Jack," Juliet said, "but they couldn't find any Chloroform. We won't be able to do anything more than to numb the area."

"What does that mean?" Kate asked from where she stood, helping Bernard set up the surgical units, "What do you mean just numb the area?" Her voice sounded terrified.

"It means…" Juliet started to explain before being cut off by Jack, his hand landing on Juliet's arm to stop her. "It means I will be just fine Kate. It's ok," he said, trying to sound as confident as he could.

Kate shook her head at him. She knew how stubborn he could be. She looked towards Juliet for confirmation. The other woman just nodded, forcing a smile on her lips. "Everything will be fine, Kate. You can leave now if you want. Bernard and I got this covered."

Kate looked back at Jack. She was terrified but somehow he managed to remain calm, smiling at her, giving her a knowing look and a nod. "I'll see you in a few hours," he said.

Outside the tent, Kate sat around a small fire with Sun, Jin and Rose. They sat quietly, waiting and anxious. It was going to be a long night. Inside the tent, Juliet and Bernard had finally set everything up and were ready to start. Bernard smiled softly at Jack as he inserted the syringe in his side. "This should be numb shortly and we can get started. Wish I could say it isn't going to hurt," Bernard apologized.

"I know," Jack nodded, "thank you Bernard."

Juliet grabbed the scalpel and took a deep breath, "you can look away, Jack, you don't need to watch this," she said when she saw him craning his neck to watch her first incision. The first cut went well, but with the second, Jack winced and clenched his teeth. With the third cut, tears were falling down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry, Jack," Juliet whispered, "I am so sorry," her voice cracked as she reached for the spreader in Bernard's hand.

Jack's cries of pain could be heard all the way down the beach. The group gathered around the tent had grown and their whispers of concern could be heard inside.

"What is she doing to him!" Kate cried, her eyes swelling up with unshed tears as she tried to push her way through the group to make it inside.

Before she could make it, Bernard stepped outside the tent, yelling for everyone to leave, to disperse and let them concentrate on their work.

"Bernard!" Kate cried, "what's going on? What is happening to him?" she asked, her voice desperate.

"Kate I promise you, everything is fine. Yes, Jack is in pain, but he is managing it just fine," Bernard assured her.

"I need to go inside," she begged him.

"I'm afraid that's not possible. You need to stay out here," Bernard said apologetically, voicing the exact orders Juliet had gave him, knowing how Kate would react.

"Come on, dear," Rose said, putting an arm around Kate's shoulder, guiding her back to their small fire.

"I need to see him," Kate whispered.

"I know you do but that won't do any good. He is in safe hands in there," Rose said calmly.

Jack clutched the blanket under him in his hands, almost tearing through it. His eyes were shut tight, his jaw clenched and his neck craned to the side as another surge of pain shot through him. The next incision Juliet made, Jack let out another scream. His shot open, bloodshot red and flooded with tears. He let go of the fabric and his hand reached over towards Juliet. He grabbed her shirt, shocking, almost causing the scalpel to land dangerously inside of him.

"Jack! What the hell are you doing!" Juliet yelled.

"Stop," he hissed at her, "just stop."

Juliet shook her head in bewilderment, her eyes wide, "I can't. You know I can't," she said.

"I don't care. Just close me up. I can't!" Jack cried again, pulling tighter at her shirt.

"Yes you can and you will!" she said, pushing his hand away sternly, fighting against her own tears. "Bernard," she said, turning to look at him, "get Kate. NOW!"

Bernard rushed out of the tent, "Kate! Kate, we need you!"

Kate stepped into the tent and the sight in front of her pinned her in her place. Her breath caught in her throat and she felt sick. The sight of Jack, his entire body drenched in sweat, writhing in pain, his face contorted and twisted in anguish was more than she thought she might handle. Jack sensed a change in the tent and opened his eyes. "Kate," he whispered and with that she was by his side. She did not know how her feet got her there or how she was breathing again but she knew she was by his side taking his hand in hers.

"Hey," she whispered, choked against the tears and to her surprise, his quivering lips turned into a small smile.

"Hey," he said back as more tears fell against his cheeks, matching hers.

She sat down on a small stool next to the bed, getting down level with him and to her shock, the next words to leave his lips were, "I'm sorry Kate, I can't do this," he whispered in pain. His declaration shocked her, it shocked her and scared her. She had never known Jack to be weak, vulnerable or to give up. She looked up briefly to Juliet and then she understood. The look on Juliet's face was clear. She needed Kate to distract Jack, to distract him and give him the strength to bear what was to come.

She looked back at Jack and somehow found her own strength to smile. She swallowed back the tears and took a deep breath. He needed her now. He needed her to be strong for him, to be for him what he had been to her so many times. She moved into him and spoke gently, "I know you're hurting, and I know you're tired, but you need to stay strong Jack, you need to do this," she said, "and I know you can."

He just closed his eyes, shut them tight and shook his head slightly, "I can't," he whispered, pleading with her.

Kate felt her throat tighten, her heart breaking for him and she leaned in closer. With one hand still holding on of his, squeezing gently, her other hand came to his face. His skin was heated and sweat collected on his brow, tears streaked along his cheeks. She softly ran her hand over his face, wiping away the sweat and tears, her thumb pressing against his cheekbone and he closed his eyes. Her touch was so gentle, so soft and so full of love, Jack failed to notice that Juliet had gone back to work. With an appreciative nod towards Kate, Juliet took the instrument back in her hand and went back to removing his appendix. Kate hand traveled to his hair, stroking the short, soft strands with her fingers, reaching the back of his head and combing through his hair gently. He moved in closer, resting her cheek against his, her lips next to his ear she whispered, "you've always been strong for us, for the group of people out there praying for you. Each one of them is being strong for you," she said, "but they need you make it through this, they need you to be ok."

She took another breath, "I need you, Jack, I need you to make it through this because I can't… I need you, Jack," she said, finally giving in to the tears again. "If we are going to get rescued, I'm going to need someone to come visit me in jail. You're the only one who'll visit me, Jack," she said.

"You aren't going to jail," she heard him mumble and she pulled back slightly, her eyes meeting his again.

"Well then, I'm going to need you to find me a lawyer because the only one I know works out of a diner in my hometown in Iowa," she said lightly.

"I will… we will do this Kate, find you the best lawyer. You're not going to jail," he said between gritted teeth as he tried to ignore the pain.

Kate smiled brightly at him, combing her fingers through his hair, moving back into him, her lips found his forehead, kissing him gently she whispered, "you can do this. You're gonna be fine."

He squeezed her hand hard, crying in pain again and her own tears fell onto his face. "Don't leave me," he begged.

"I'm not going anywhere," she reassured him.

It was another hour before Juliet left the tent and was immediately surrounded by the survivors who had stayed up waiting for news on their leader's health.

"What happened?" "Is he ok?" Came their frantic questions and Juliet wanted nothing more than to just head to her own tent and cry herself to sleep, but it would not be fair to them.

"Guys, guys, let her through," Bernard spoke immediately, helping her make her way through the gathering, "Jack's fine. He's absolutely fine. Just let Juleit rest," he said and smiled back at her when she looked at him appreciatively.

"He's sleeping now, but the surgery went fine," Bernard added.

It was first light when Juliet went back to the tent to check up on Jack. She made sure the beach was still empty to avoid anyone. As she had expected, she found Kate still perched on the stool she had left her on the night before, grasping Jack's hand in hers and watching him.

"Did you sleep at all?" Juliet asked softly.

Kate looked up and smiled, "I'm not sure," she said.

"You should rest for a bit, I can handle things here," Juliet offered.

"No, it's ok, I'm fine," Kate quickly replied.

"Kate, I need to check the stitches and redress the wound anyway. Go take a nap or eat something," Juliet said, "we can't afford anyone else on a makeshift hospital bed," she added, trying to lighten the mood to get the other woman to get some rest.

Kate conceded. She nodded and before walking out she said, "thank you… thank you for saving his life."

"I could not have done it without you, Kate," Juliet replied, "thank you."

"I… I didn't do anything," Kate said.

Juliet shook her head, "yes you did…" she said, but Kate just dropped her head and shook it slightly, "no one could have done what you did…"

Kate felt fresh tears burn her eyes as she remembered the dreadful events of the previous night. "He kissed me," Juliet suddenly said and Kate could only just look up at her, whispering an almost inaudible 'Oh'.

"Jack kissed me the other day, and it was nice," Juliet said, "but he loves you, Kate. You know that, don't you?"

Kate looked at the ground below her, unable to look at Juliet, not sure what she would say. "Does he know how you feel?" Juliet asked.

Kate finally looked up, the tears rolling down her cheeks and she shook her head.

"Don't break his heart, Kate. He doesn't deserve that," Juliet said, turning around, giving Kate the chance to leave, "tell him how you feel but don't break his heart."

END

So yeah, not my greatest outing with these two but I just had to write this.