"HEY, LOSERS!"
The entire hall, filled with murmurs and guffaws, instantly died down. A sea of heads faced their new AVL director, Valerie Da Vinci. By her expression, some agents shielded their ears from the loud speaker erupting her shrill voice. Something about her bullet-hole-sized pupils told them that Valerie wasn't down for playing games.
"It's not a coincidence that our progress is going nowhere because you have as much attention span as a freaking sloth!" Valerie yelled, secretly enjoying the terror seeping from within these agents. One Rookie even fainted into another's arms. Her cheeks glowed like two ripe tomatoes, making sure everyone noticed she wasn't in the mood for anyone's wit. Especially from Agents Gru and Wilde. The surface area of one pea revealed how she was almost done with those two and their childish pranks. Yet, the league needed them.
Clapping her hands, Valerie summoned the gigantic AVL monitor. Two main villains presented themselves across the entire screen: Zig, a dirty-blonde woman that wore a grape-coloured suit with a matching mask. Also Zag, a man who wore a zaffre-coloured hoodie with a matching mask. Both faces were completely unrecognisable, that even their databases couldn't attract DNA. They weren't interested in theft or becoming the richest humans known to mankind. When it came to Zig & Zag's heists, the AVL were dealing with mental manipulation. Twelve reported cases delivered day after day - twelve agents have been missing. Rumour has it, three agents have been sighted attempting to injure civilians.
"You see these two nut-cases? You recognise them?!" Her pearly-white teeth were like intimidating stage lights, searching for their next victim. Storming across the podium, Valerie reached her favourite couple she enjoyed pulverising, and asked with a sarcastic tone, "Do you recognise them, Agent Gru? How about you, Agent Wilde? Seeing that you're the favourite."
Valerie's large toucan nose traced the tip of Lucy's nose, speeding up her heart-rate. Her eyes mirrored two gun barrels, preparing to shoot her if the wrong answer was given. Sometimes Lucy wouldn't put up with her bossiness and lack of kindness. However, seeing that her behaviour against Miss Da Vinci placed her under probation, Lucy kept herself under control.
Compressing her lips together, Lucy responded with a straight posture and a quick, "Y-Yes, Ma'am."
The heavy rock floated from her chest once Valerie walked away. Peering around for eavesdroppers, Lucy whispered to Gru, "Why does she always pick on me?!"
Both pairs of eyes glanced in Valerie's direction. Her arms flailed like a crazed sky dancer, explaining her obscure reason about why Zig & Zag haven't been captured. If this woman stopped wasting her time blaming the agents, rather than her own pessimistic work, maybe they would've had success.
Gru scoffed, "Don't let her get tu yu. Maybe she's just jealous."
"Ha! Jealous of what?" A shrill voice reminded Gru of Jillian. Except, this voice didn't belong to Jillian. Before looking up, Gru and Lucy knew exactly who the speaker was.
Emily Carnell, the wife to her smug-faced husband, Tom Carnell, was the woman who contradicted his argument. This couple happened to be Gru and Lucy's least favourite agents in the entire league, mainly because of their obnoxious pride in themselves and nobody else. No matter the subject, whether it'd be a mission discussion or training, Emily and Tom always had fire waiting to spit out of their tongues.
Gru, however, wasn't planning to allow their snarky comments get to them. "Sorry, I didn't give yu an invitation tu our discussion."
Emily scoffed, "Oh I do apologise, Mister 'I'm so incredible because I used to be a villain'."
The two doubled over in laughter. Emily never worshipped Lucy as much as the majority of the league. Gru began to think that she might've been jealous too. Having a wife qualified in all types of martial arts, villain studies, and secret agent codes were like living the dream.
"Yeah, Wilde. You're the favourite freak," Emily guffawed, running a hand through her brunette quiff. Fortunately, everyone surrounding her sent disapproving glances. Not that they discouraged her. In fact, Emily had enough evidence to support her argument, "Wow, that must be an honour. Everyone thinks you're the best agent, and that makes me want to...what's the best way to put this? Oh yeah, puke."
A crowd of six agents hovering around the Carnells erupted with laughter. Others sent disgusted glances, or sympathetic expressions at Lucy. Somehow, she wanted to respond Words never hurt me, Emily. Try Krav Maga next time. Maybe she should save herself the pain, just in case Emily planned an attack.
"I don't see a lot of appreciation for you, Emily." Lucy suddenly responded, "What do you expect to receive when your sense of humour is dead?"
The agents who sympathised with Lucy gasped aloud, or broke into hysterics. Lucy Wilde - the finest agent in the Anti-Villain League - rarely revealed her sassy side. Beside her heart it lay, prowling and waiting for its right moment. Everyone admired Lucy for her bravery; nobody dared arguing with Emily and Tom Carnell. Their vicious-looking eyes in response to Lucy's comment supported that argument.
"Dead." Emily despised the taste of that word on her tongue. Especially hearing it being directed to her. Keeping her anger together, she scoffed, "You're a real funny bitch, aren't you?"
Lucy straightened her posture. Don't let her win. Despite being a lanky redhead, Emily Carnell managed intimidating her from being a couple of inches taller. Those eyes - a lioness marking her prey - pierced into her mind. She refused to respond. There wasn't any need for an argument.
Huffing, Emily tapped a finger on her lips. Her Lioness eyes observed Lucy; the clogs turned inside her brain. Then, she sneered, "You won't be laughing when you realise my sense of humour isn't the only thing that's dead, is it?"
Only one word flashed in Lucy's mind. Parents. How did Emily Carnell know about her parents?
Questioning would've proved weakness. Instead, Lucy warned, "Don't."
"Paul and Elizabeth Wilde, right?" Emily's voice seemed louder than Valerie Da Vinci's microphone, so all the agents' attention attracted to her. "Your parents? Those embarrassing so-called agents who Ramsbottom admired? Yeah, they're dead too."
She heard her voice break whilst uttering, "Shut up."
"Ashamed of their fate, Wilde?" A childish voice rose from her throat, pretending to actually feel sorry for her. "Poor Lizzie and Paul...They sure had a real blast, right?"
All of a sudden, Gru's berserk button had been smashed. Using himself as a protective shield against Lucy, even though he knew his wife could professionally protect herself, Gru raised his fists and growled, "Yu want tu insult my wife? Yu're going tu get through these hands if yu even try!"
Emily Carnell froze. Her eyes widened, like spotting a ghost lingering behind Gru. However, before Tom could lift the sleeves of his blazer, Emily released the most sinister laugh that even a villain would take a couple of steps back. Her husband joined in, yet finding Gru's threat less hilarious than his wife did.
Wiping a tear from her eye, Emily waved her arms in the air to capture everyone's attention. That bratty little girl voice returned, cheering, "Oh, look everybody! Our hero, Gru. Hallelujah!"
Nothing could escape from his mouth. Everything that Emily Carnell hissed at him withdrew his power. Keep calm, no need to start unwanted drama.
However, Emily loved silence: her greatest power. Proving her opponent felt weak. Sneering at Gru when he placed his hands behind his back, she scoffed, "Saving the day again, but out of luck. What father lets a psycho villain kidnap his daughters? That's right, you."
Shoving harsh emphasis on her last word, Emily jabbed her manicured finger into Gru's chest. Something about how red his cheeks became made the agents around him stand back. When Gru became furious, nobody liked witnessing it. He took a couple of steps closer towards her, but Lucy grabbed his arm and whispered, "Gru, she's not worth it."
But, he hardly had any time to reply, as Valerie shoved Emily and Gru away from each other, screeching, "THAT'S ENOUGH! What do you think this is, a Grade Seven school fight? Get back into your place, Agent Carnell!" Valerie spat towards Emily, who rolled her eyes and leaped back beside her husband.
"If I find any of you underachieving or threatening any other agent, you'll be kicked out this league before you can say sorry!"
Several agents gasped. Gru and Lucy wouldn't listen, not even after their trauma from being fired last time. A new threat overcame them. The Carnells' haunting faces wouldn't shift from their thoughts.
After the meeting, Emily and Tom only sent snarky glances before leaving. Gru couldn't think whose faces appeared stupider than theirs. One day, he'd love to punch that snarky grin from their faces. See who laughed then. However, his thoughts trailed to his wife, who stumbled beside him with her hands resting in her coat pockets. Usually, Lucy would hold Gru's hand and start a conversation about the villain they were planning to capture. Today was different.
He knew exactly why.
Their drive wasn't full of bubbly conversation. Whilst his eyes focused on the road, Gru occasionally glanced at Lucy, who stared like a guilty child caught stealing candy. Should he ask about her thoughts? Whenever he fell silent, she would always support him and offer optimistic advice.
"Honey, are yu okay?" Gru blurted. Not the best sentence starter, but better than silence.
Keeping her eyes fixed on the window, Lucy gulped, "I'm fine."
Gru sighed. That response wasn't the answer he wanted. Neither was the heart-breaking crack in Lucy's voice. Only three times Lucy gave in to a breakdown in front of him in their relationship; nothing hurt him more than seeing his daughters or the love of his life cry over worthless people.
"I've known yu for four years," Gru spoke with a voice softer than silk. Compared to others, where his rougher side would appear, he reserved this voice just for her and the girls. "I know when yu're not okay, and I don't like seeing yur smile disappear."
Those words engraved into Lucy's mind. They had a real blast, right? Yeah Wilde, you're he favourite freak. Maybe others couldn't give a damn about her existence, but her husband, without a trait of doubt, always would.
She sniffled, "I just...you're right. I shouldn't let her get to me. Maybe she's right, when she told me I'm a freak. So is Miss Da Vinci. We're not catching those guys...what if we're fired again?"
This time, Gru pondered over her words. Yes, Valerie fired them once, but once again they helped stabilise the AVL with their intelligent plans. Bratt was defeated. Everybody admired them - except two people. Yet, Lucy wouldn't let her mind overthink this cowardly couple. What changed?
"Hey...yu are perfect tu me," Gru smiled, noticing the corner of her mouth upturn. He knew little comments like that melted her heart. "Don't listen tu dat fish on legs."
Nothing about his insult towards Emily Carnell made sense whatsoever, but gaining a cheeky laugh from Lucy happened to be a success in his books. He copied her laughter - a sound that pleasured his ears every single day. He continued, "Don't yu worry. We're going tu capture dem. If we can catch Bratt, we can catch dose circus freaks. Even yur parents know you can du it."
Comforting wasn't, in fact, Gru's best quality. Pessimistic words or threats consisted the majority of his life. Villains weren't built for comforting. But, his life took a sudden change in direction once his house filled with enthusiastic girls. Now, comforting became a favourite hobby. He knew he'd be there for his family, no matter what maniac attempted to break them apart.
Grasping Lucy's hand, resting both palms atop her lap, Gru smiled, "Grucy will never be defeated, right?"
Holding hands might've been a subtle way of affection, but Gru's heart always skipped a beat whenever they touched. He knew Lucy was his. That simple touch told him that she would stay by his side forever. Closing his eyes for a moment, Gru thanked his wonderful life for finding Lucy. This funny, beautiful, and adorable lady. His mind focused on her, and nothing else. Until he opened his eyes-
"Aaaaah!" Gru screamed, swerving the steering wheel to the right.
His thoughts overcame his driving awareness, as the wheel tilted left towards an innocent motorcyclist, who'd been knocked off his vehicle. Wincing, Gru stared into the rear-mirror where the motorcyclist sent him a rather obscene gesture.
Lucy noticed, but instead patted Gru's palm and placed his hand on the steering wheel again. She giggled, "Maybe keep both your hands on the wheel, sweetie."
Trying to control his rapid breaths, Gru nodded and glued his eyes to the road. Phew. A car crash was the last situation he wanted to put them into. At least Lucy boosted his confidence, as her quirky nature bounced back to life. With her head resting on his shoulder, the day seemed to become brighter as he pulled up alongside their daughters' school.
Gru and Lucy stepped out the vehicle, observing hundreds of kids dashing towards their parents. Picking up the girls from school happened to become their favourite time of day. Their gleeful faces unable to bear a single second without their parents, eager to tell their school adventures until they ran out of breath.
"Hey, Mom and Dad!" Agnes exclaimed, diving into her mother's arms. Her endearing grin invaded everyone's face, as she cheered, "I've had the best day ever!"
Lucy understood what emotions overcame her when the realisation hit her that one night - she's a mom. Hearing that beautiful word never ceased to fill her heart with butterflies. Gru shared this experience too. Since the marriage, the girls referred to them as their parents. He couldn't have a more valid reason not to tear-up at dad.
So, as they were the best parents in the world, Gru and Lucy listened as Agnes rambled, "We did a school-play and I was the unicorn!" Agnes held up her glittery unicorn outfit in the air.
"I won the ultimate dodgeball match!" Edith held up her shining gold trophy.
"Avery invited us all for a sleepover!" Margo grinned, pointing to a blonde-haired girl across the playground.
"Woah, woah, woah." Gru wavered his arms. Their conversation dived into a halt, before he continued, "Hold yur horses, Margo. Avery?" Before Margo could open her mouth in response, Gru cocked his brow, "Girl or a boy? Yu haven't answered dat question yet."
Recalling this exact conversation two years ago, Margo rolled her eyes as she nodded, "She's a girl, Dad."
Before Gru could argue his perfectly reasonable point that sleepovers weren't always what they seemed - even though there wasn't any proof that backed him up - Lucy jumped in and nodded, "Of course you can! A girly sleepover, why not?"
Once Gru heard their gleeful cheer echo across the playground, causing many children to stare in their direction, there wasn't any turning back.
The journey home filled with laughter and stories about Gru and Lucy's recent missions. Of course, Emily and Tom Carnell were slashed from the conversation. No need to worry the girls. Those two were dismal compared to their beautiful family.
At least their girls could anticipate their exciting sleepover.