Title: The Scooby Gang 1/5
Author: memarkw
Spoilers: None
Disclaimers: I don't own any of them, I make no profit
from this, and I can only dream that the owners read this
and think "Hey, he's good, let's hire him."
The Slayer was just sitting in the easy chair when
Willow walked in. The look on her face said the she was
not happy.
"Hey Buffy, what's wrong?"
"God, Willow, what's right?"
"Um, two plus two still equals four."
Buffy groaned.
"Sorry, bad joke. Really, what's wrong?"
Buffy stood up and walked to the window. Opening the
drapes, she said "I've never told you about my cousin,
have I?"
"No. I didn't know you had a cousin."
"That's because I can't stand her. She's an idiot. A
moron. Stupid. Clumsy. She's always in distress. God,
why do they have to come here?"
"They?"
"She's bringing her friends. Why here? They're all
pains in the ass. Well, one of them is ok, but the
others..."
"Come on, it can't be that bad."
"People are always comparing us. Everyone thinks we
look alike. It's like that show my mom watches on Nick At
Night. The one with the twin cousins? We don't look
alike. Hey! Maybe we can go visit Cordy and Angel!"
"Um, no. They went to Australia on vacation,
remember?"
"Crap. Well, I guess I have to face her then. I so
don't want to be here."
"I can help with that. Let's go to the Magic Box.
Xander wants to show us his new dog."
"New dog? I thought Xander was allergic to dogs."
"Not that I know of. Why would you think that?"
"I don't know. I've been here, what, seven years and
no one has ever owned a dog or cat. I figured someone
must be allergic. I just assumed it was Xander. I don't
know why. Speaking of dogs, my cousin and her friends
have one. Just want I need, some huge dog running around
my house."
"They're staying here?"
"Yeah. I love her mom. Aunt Darlene asked me if they
could stay here. I guess my cousin told her they had some
mystery to solve in Sunnydale and, naturally, Darlene
called me."
"Ahh. Sounds like there's no way out for you. You
coming with me?"
"I guess. I should leave a note, though. I hate to be
rude."
"You do? Since when?"
Buffy left a note explaining where she was and how to
get there. The two girls walked to the Magic Box. When
they walked in, the rest of the small group was already
there.
"Dawn? I thought you were at Cheryl's."
"I was. They wanted to go party, and me, being the
responsible teen that I am, told them I couldn't go. It
IS Tuesday, after all."
"Tuesday?"
"Uh huh. Remember - 'Dawn's in trouble? Must be
Tuesday.'"
"Oh. Who told?"
Anya came from around the counter. "Told? I didn't
know it was a secret. I mean, last Tuesday she locked
herself out of the house. The Tuesday before that her
little friend's car broke down. The Tuesday before that
she was bitten by that Hroksher demon. The Tues-"
"Ok, thanks Anya."
"You're welcome."
"Hey Willow, Buffy." Xander came out of the training
room with a great dane following.
"Wow," was all the Buffy could say.
Willow walked over and scratched the big dog behind the
ears. "He's beautiful."
"Bitch."
Everyone turned and looked at Anya. "Bitch. It's not
a he, it's a she. A female dog, a bitch. Good grief."
Buffy looked back at Xander. "What's her name?'
"Roxy. She just looks like a Roxy. She's great, watch
this." He held his hand in the air and snapped twice.
The dog turned in circles twice and sat down. Xander gave
a two tone whistle through his teeth and the dog jumped
into the air, then played dead. "Watch this, this is my
favorite." He walked around the counter, stood next to
Dawn, and asked Anya to take the dog into the training
room. When they were out of site, Xander said "Ghost!"
Without warning, the dog bound from the training room,
lept the counter, and knocked Dawn down. She
ceremoniously sat on top of Dawn while Xander laughed.
While the group was laughing and talking about what a
great friend Xander had found, they were interrupted by a
masculine voice.
"Did I hear someone say ghost?"
The slayer and her friends turned to see a tall blonde
man wearing a white sweater, red ascot, and blue bell
bottoms standing in the door. Behind him, there were
other people trying to get in.
"Fred, move!" He was jostled aside and three more
people walked in, followed by a dog. Another great dane.
The dog promptly walked to Roxy and started sniffing at
her. The small girl that had pushed Fred aside walked
over to Willow and introduced herself.
"Hi, I'm Velma." She pointed to the scraggly looking
fellow standing next to Fred. "That's Shaggy."
By this time everyone had fallen deafly quiet. Velma's
introduction had fallen on deaf ears. They were staring
at the young woman wearing the purple blouse and skirt.
They were staring at Buffy. Only she was wearing a long
red wig. Then they heard the real Buffy talking.
"Hi, cousin. Welcome to Sunnydale. Now, please, get
Scooby's nose out of Roxy's ass.
Author: memarkw
Spoilers: None
Disclaimers: I don't own any of them, I make no profit
from this, and I can only dream that the owners read this
and think "Hey, he's good, let's hire him."
The Slayer was just sitting in the easy chair when
Willow walked in. The look on her face said the she was
not happy.
"Hey Buffy, what's wrong?"
"God, Willow, what's right?"
"Um, two plus two still equals four."
Buffy groaned.
"Sorry, bad joke. Really, what's wrong?"
Buffy stood up and walked to the window. Opening the
drapes, she said "I've never told you about my cousin,
have I?"
"No. I didn't know you had a cousin."
"That's because I can't stand her. She's an idiot. A
moron. Stupid. Clumsy. She's always in distress. God,
why do they have to come here?"
"They?"
"She's bringing her friends. Why here? They're all
pains in the ass. Well, one of them is ok, but the
others..."
"Come on, it can't be that bad."
"People are always comparing us. Everyone thinks we
look alike. It's like that show my mom watches on Nick At
Night. The one with the twin cousins? We don't look
alike. Hey! Maybe we can go visit Cordy and Angel!"
"Um, no. They went to Australia on vacation,
remember?"
"Crap. Well, I guess I have to face her then. I so
don't want to be here."
"I can help with that. Let's go to the Magic Box.
Xander wants to show us his new dog."
"New dog? I thought Xander was allergic to dogs."
"Not that I know of. Why would you think that?"
"I don't know. I've been here, what, seven years and
no one has ever owned a dog or cat. I figured someone
must be allergic. I just assumed it was Xander. I don't
know why. Speaking of dogs, my cousin and her friends
have one. Just want I need, some huge dog running around
my house."
"They're staying here?"
"Yeah. I love her mom. Aunt Darlene asked me if they
could stay here. I guess my cousin told her they had some
mystery to solve in Sunnydale and, naturally, Darlene
called me."
"Ahh. Sounds like there's no way out for you. You
coming with me?"
"I guess. I should leave a note, though. I hate to be
rude."
"You do? Since when?"
Buffy left a note explaining where she was and how to
get there. The two girls walked to the Magic Box. When
they walked in, the rest of the small group was already
there.
"Dawn? I thought you were at Cheryl's."
"I was. They wanted to go party, and me, being the
responsible teen that I am, told them I couldn't go. It
IS Tuesday, after all."
"Tuesday?"
"Uh huh. Remember - 'Dawn's in trouble? Must be
Tuesday.'"
"Oh. Who told?"
Anya came from around the counter. "Told? I didn't
know it was a secret. I mean, last Tuesday she locked
herself out of the house. The Tuesday before that her
little friend's car broke down. The Tuesday before that
she was bitten by that Hroksher demon. The Tues-"
"Ok, thanks Anya."
"You're welcome."
"Hey Willow, Buffy." Xander came out of the training
room with a great dane following.
"Wow," was all the Buffy could say.
Willow walked over and scratched the big dog behind the
ears. "He's beautiful."
"Bitch."
Everyone turned and looked at Anya. "Bitch. It's not
a he, it's a she. A female dog, a bitch. Good grief."
Buffy looked back at Xander. "What's her name?'
"Roxy. She just looks like a Roxy. She's great, watch
this." He held his hand in the air and snapped twice.
The dog turned in circles twice and sat down. Xander gave
a two tone whistle through his teeth and the dog jumped
into the air, then played dead. "Watch this, this is my
favorite." He walked around the counter, stood next to
Dawn, and asked Anya to take the dog into the training
room. When they were out of site, Xander said "Ghost!"
Without warning, the dog bound from the training room,
lept the counter, and knocked Dawn down. She
ceremoniously sat on top of Dawn while Xander laughed.
While the group was laughing and talking about what a
great friend Xander had found, they were interrupted by a
masculine voice.
"Did I hear someone say ghost?"
The slayer and her friends turned to see a tall blonde
man wearing a white sweater, red ascot, and blue bell
bottoms standing in the door. Behind him, there were
other people trying to get in.
"Fred, move!" He was jostled aside and three more
people walked in, followed by a dog. Another great dane.
The dog promptly walked to Roxy and started sniffing at
her. The small girl that had pushed Fred aside walked
over to Willow and introduced herself.
"Hi, I'm Velma." She pointed to the scraggly looking
fellow standing next to Fred. "That's Shaggy."
By this time everyone had fallen deafly quiet. Velma's
introduction had fallen on deaf ears. They were staring
at the young woman wearing the purple blouse and skirt.
They were staring at Buffy. Only she was wearing a long
red wig. Then they heard the real Buffy talking.
"Hi, cousin. Welcome to Sunnydale. Now, please, get
Scooby's nose out of Roxy's ass.