Before you read, I think this piece needs a little explanation: Every time I look up the Next Gen Potter kids on Harry Potter Wiki, there's always a little note in their profile mentioning how their parents have both been possessed by Voldemort at one point. It always caught my attention. So of course, being the Tom Riddle freak that I am, I kinda took that idea and ran with it. xD
Characters: Ginny, Lily Luna, Tom Riddle, itty bit of Harry and the boys
Pairings: Some references Harry/Ginny. Faint hints of Ginny/Tom, if you squint REALLY hard.
Disclaimer: It is my greatest regret in life that I was not born before Jo, because then I could have written Harry Potter first. Alas, it was not to be. HP will never be mine. :(
Note: This is written in freeverse style, but it definitely leans more toward story than poem.
YOU never wanted this
(thisthis thing
this monster)
YOU told him
YOU warned him
{no one ever listens to the littlest Weasley}
|x|x|
"I want c.h.i.l.d.r.e.n."
he said
"I want a baby."
and you smiled(grimaced)
and told him
"Too soon."
"Not yet."
"I'm not ready."
until the days piled up into
weeksmonthsseasonsYEARS
and the weight of your denial
pressed heavyhard on your heart
so the word slipped out (oops)
"Yes."
|x|x|
it's not that you don't l o v e him
(youdoyoudoyoudodon'tyou?)
it's not that you n.e.v.e.r DREAMED
about a warmsoftround body in your arms
(youdidyoudidyoudiddidn'tyou?)
BUT FEAR CAN BE {STRONGER} THAN LOVE
AND D R E A M S
and you are so very, very afraid
because YOU remember
the FEEL—
the terror—
the ungodly c r a v i n g—
of HIM
inside of YOU, heartbody&soul
(has Harry forgotten? HOW can he have forgotten?)
YOU REMEMBER
and you would nevernevernever
wish that on a .single. .living. .soul.
and |never|never|never| on your babies
the ink runs in you and the venom runs in him
HE is {double-fold} inside any
c.h.i.l.d of yours
INK [drowned] you
& VENOM [scarred] him
and any
c.h.i.l.d of yours
could be
drowned&scarred&poisoned
[because he is too strong for death
& HE WILL find you
(he always finds you)
and any
c.h.i.l.d
of
yours]
|x|x|
One night you dream of him—
he strangles your arms
as he l a u g h s in your face
crying, "IT BEGINS."—
& you know
& you dread
& you tell your husband
& his smile slices you in tw|o
{and so IT BEGINS}
|x|x|
You worry and fret and
d e s t r o y | y o u r s e l f
for nine .l.o.n.g. months
(public&husbandsee your
happyface: :-)
public never guesses
husband can never get the truth out of you)
and once every .g.o.d.d.a.m.n. month
you dream of HIM
& his lovelydangerous hands
his blindingcorrosive eyes
his terribleterrible WORDS
and when the painpainPAIN
attacks you hard-swift-vicious
(one week early, dirty trick)
you think you're going to DIE
{Harry doesn't understand why you
scream so much with the paink.i.l.l.e.r.s
but YOUR PAIN is differentdifferent
so NO he WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND}
when you hold your beautiful beautiful boy
you are hit with a chimera of
joyagonylovefear
each one fightsandfights for dominance,
but when you see his warm clear
light brown
eyes
JOY WINS (not him)
and you cry/laugh and hold your
baby boy without fear
|x|x|
it is easier to agree, the second time.
a l m o s t the same, with:
"Too soon."
"Not yet."
"I'm not ready."
weeksmonthsseasonsYEARS
and then—
"Yes. James would like a sibling."
you don't feel GUILTY until
He steals into your sleep
(your blueblackwhite phantom)
& crows
" R o u n d t . w . o "
|x|x|
AGAIN there is
the onslaught of painpainPAIN
(one month late, make up your mind)
fear r|a|v|a|g|e|s your heart
PLEASE GOD DON'T LET HIM WIN THIS TIME
PLEASE
and then
baby out
baby wrapped
baby held…
…with eyes of HARRYHARRY-green
and you sob/grin believing LOVE and D R E A M S
are {STRONGER} than FEAR
and you are finally happy
(oops~)
|x|x|
weeksseasonsmonthsYEARS (only two, dear)
"Why not?"
[[have you forgotten? HOW can you have forgotten?]]
|x|x|
nine months without dreams
(you stupid girl, you SHOULD HAVE KNOWN)
but YOU saw only darkness while HE
touched your stomach and
whispered
"serpensortia"
|x|x|
you know the drill, sweetheart:
painpainPAIN
cries-shouts-tight-hands-on-sheets
and then
baby out
baby wrapped
baby held…
dark eyes black eyes your eyes
("I win!")
and you smile(SCREAM) and hold your
poor, poor girl
("MerlinpleaseFORGIVEME.")
|x|x|
she dreams in ink and venom
there is a snake inside of her
YOU can only watch&love her love her&hate him fear him
YOU never wanted this
(thisthis thing
this monster
inside of your daughter)
YOU told him (never |outright|, you coward)
YOU warned him (not enough, you fool)
|x|x|
{it's all your fault, isn't it?}
|x|x|
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