Author's Note: Hello again my fellow FMA lovers. I am back. Perhaps not better than ever, but I am back. :D Anyhoo, This was written for the FMA Reverse Big Bang challenge on LJ (I actually finished this year! Albeit late...simantics...) I am dead dog tired from this huge move that I made yesterday so I will not be ranting tonight. A GREAT BIG THANK YOU to my awesome artist StarShiruke and my amazing beta SammyQuill (who unfortunately couldn't be here today). Both are amazing cheerleaders and I love you both!

Here's chapter uno. I will do my best to post a chapter a day, since it's a completed story. I won't make any guarentees. You guys know how my work schedule can be. Enjoy!

1. Never challenge an alchemist, even in a battle without alchemy. You may get just what you ask for.

Usually, when Riza Hawkeye shot at someone, they were scared of her and they left her alone. Well, she never really did shoot anyone just to scare them. She just shot at a spot that happened to be near their head but was far enough away so that, If they were to do anything but duck in the time that it took for the bullet to leave her gun and travel to hit a wall near them, it wouldn't kill them. This time, however, her shooting had an opposite effect. Lieutenant Sunova Herbert went from a loud mouthed, sexist pig to having a crush on the blond sniper in the three seconds that it took for her bullet to knock a picture off of the wall behind his head.

The man had been raised to believe that women shouldn't do anything aside from pleasure a man, let alone conduct a seminar on weapons safety, and he decided that he was going to tell her how much he disapproved of it in front of the entire group. He wasn't nice about it either. So, it was a shock to her when he approached her and asked for additional shooting training at the range and an even bigger shock when he began hitting on her, during that training. She promptly denied him, of course, choosing to ignore the mildly vulgar comments and not-so-subtle innuendos. However, it was very hard to ignore when he pulled one of those stunts in front of her commanding officer.

It was lunch time the next day and she had met Colonel Mustang, and Lieutenants Havoc and Breda in the mess hall. They had just met at the entrance and were about to get in line for food when a yell bounced off of the walls near them.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye!"

The group stopped and Riza turned around and could barely release a sigh before the sandy haired man stopped in front of her holding a rifle out for her inspection. From the corner of her eye she could see Havoc's eyebrow lift quizzically and, oh how she wished that she could smack the amused expression off of his face. Instead she ignored him and focused on getting rid of this man before her commander, who was standing on her other side visibly seething, got rid of him permanently. She should have known better than to tell him what was going on.

"What can I help you with, Lieutenant?"

"Well, I don't suppose you've changed your mind about having dinner with me? I could show you a good time." His thick southern accent coupled with his words was enough to make Roy's eye twitch. His wiggling eyebrow made Riza want to shoot him herself before the Colonel got a chance.

"No, Lieutenant. What do you need?"

"Well," His rifle took center stage again and the sneaking suspicion, that he was faking his deficiency in weapons knowledge just to get close to her, hit her for the umpteenth time in the last two days. "I was hoping that you could show me how to properly align my shaft." Her eyes closed and she took a quick breath when she noticed her superior mentally fly off the handle and Havoc and Breda's smirks turned into a fit of giggles that school girls would be jealous of.

"You better watch your mouth when you talk to her, Lieutenant." Roy's words may not have been harsh but the venom and power in his voice made them seem that way as he took a step forward in front of his Lieutenant. "Ladies are to be respected regardless of if they're wearing a uniform or not and you may not speak that way around one."

"I was talking about my rifle, Sir." The southern man was eerily calm despite the reprimand he had just received.

"I know exactly what you were talking about, Lieutenant, and your rifle was definitely not it. What is your name?"

"Sunova Herbert, sir."

"Lieutenant Herbert, huh? You're the charge that Lieutenant Hawkeye so kindly took on, who has been hitting on her, nonstop, for the last two days, with that disgusting mouth of yours, aren't you. I highly suggest that you find yourself a new teacher, Herbert, or you may not last much longer."

"What the hell is going on here?" A new face pushed his way through the crowd and Riza recognized him as the colonel that was in charge of southern headquarters. She snapped to a salute, along with the still giggling Breda and Havoc behind her. Lieutenant Herbert and Colonel Mustang remained the way they were.

"As you were." It was Roy who spoke. "Colonel Moft. I was just teaching your rowdy Lieutenant, here, a bit on respecting ladies."

"Now why on earth do you think he would need that?" Roy's angrily turned toward him.

"He spoke to my Lieutenant in a way that I find extremely offensive and, as she has told me before, she does too." The older man smirked and looked past the younger colonel.

"Which one, Mustang? The red-head or the one with the permanent cigarette." Both of the men in question stopped their laughing and glared but Roy remained unfazed.

"All three of them."

"Sir, if I may." It was Lieutenant Herbert who had butted in and with a smirk on his face at his superior's joke. "I had only asked Lieutenant Hawkeye on a date and when she turned me down, I asked her a question about my rifle."

Roy directed his anger back to Herbert. "It was a little more than that," he said, but Colonel Moft ignored him. "Now, why would she turn you down, Son?"

Roy interviened. "Because she's not interested."

"And how do you know that, Mustang."

"She has made it perfectly clear, Moft."

"Well, I certainly don't hear her objecting. I think it's you who's not int'rested in letting your precious bodyguard go. All you alchemists must control everything including your s'bordinants. So how 'bout this. How 'bout we take that control away tomorrow?" Roy's eyes narrowed.

"What do you propose."

"The best of your team against the best o' mine. Winner gets the girl."

Riza tried protesting but Roy held out his hand to the colonel.

"You're on."

"One more thing Mustang," Moft said before taking it, "No Alchemy."

Roy smirked. "No problem." With that, they shook hands.

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