Disclaimer: all characters belong to Tite Kubo. I just like to screw around with them a bit.
A/N: here I am again! With yet another Renji x Byakuya fic - I won't deny it, this is my favourite pairing in the entire of Bleach, and perhaps in general, and I'll probably never stop writing it.
This is much lighter than my last fic, although I suppose if you read between the lines there's a teeny bit of angst buried in there, but hey, it's impossible not to have a story without some sort of problem!
Warnings: well everyone, it's rated M for a reason - engage the brains.
Anyway, enough chat for now, let's get to it.
~ Takeshi
Renji neglected to knock on the wooden door of the 6th division's head office as he brutally slammed it open. Storming inside with his usual lack of respect for authority, he clasped a teetering pile of documents to his muscular chest, the colossal stack of papers, stamped with the 6th division's insignia, obscuring his face.
"Hey, Kuchi-" began Renji, before abruptly realising that his captain was nowhere to be seen, or felt. He narrowed his eyes and dumped the papers on his desk, ignoring them as they collapsed over the chair and half the floor. He looked around quickly to double-check that Byakuya wasn't there and that he hadn't just gone mad and lost his power to sense reiatsu.
Byakuya, th' fuck are you?
Renji frowned, perplexed. In all his time as the vice-captain of the division, during working hours, he had always, without fail, managed to locate Kuchiki-taichou. He usually resided in his office, but sometimes Renji would find him quietly wandering the small gardens outside, walking serenely among the cherry blossom trees, his face solemn as he remembered happier times. Given his location, Renji simply assumed that he was dwelling on his somber past, reliving memories of Hisana, and he knew better than to try to reach Byakuya when he was ensnared in his own thoughts, and so he left well enough alone.
But still, Byakuya's reiatsu had slowly morphed into a comforting pressure on his shoulders, giving him a sense of warmth and protection. For it to suddenly disappear...
I feel... lonely. I miss your presence.
He stooped wearily to retrieve the papers that had made a valiant attempt for freedom, and flopped exhaustedly into his comfortable chair. Crouching over his desk, he attempted to attend to the paperwork with the diligence that Byakuya expected of him, but found his focus increasingly wandering to other things.
What if you're hurt or somethin'?
He dismissed the idea as quickly as it bubbled into his mind. It was ridiculously foolish.
Ain't no one who can get near Byakuya.
He grinned despite himself, with a small pride at the fact that the captain he was willingly serving under was so, invincible.
Renji sighed and rubbed his eyes, squinting down at the small, cramped writing of the documents resting on the desk. The familiar traces of reiatsu that lead to a number of his friends... Rangiku... Madarame... wound their way gently into his mind, but he pressed the tantalising temptation to join them away, wanting to be here when Byakuya did eventually return.
He searched fruitlessly for several more minutes, trying to drive away the desperation that increasingly threatened to consume him, but there was nothing. He felt only blackness and emptiness. Byakuya...
Why do I feel s'damn alone?
A distant flare of reiatsu burned low in the darkness, barely detectable, and vanishing as quickly as it flickered haltingly into life. Renji opened his eyes and blinked quickly. It could only be Byakuya's. Who else would be s' fucking far away from here? Well, at least you're fine, you're okay.
He resumed his work unenthusiastically, bending conscientiously over the first of the documents. "Authorisation of recruit (No.:11532) transfer to 11th division," he read out loud slowly. Flipping through the pile, he found that the majority of the files were similar: requests to accept other recruits; medical examinations that were due, the results of others; upcoming students that looked promising in the shinigami academy... all equally dry and boring.
Fuck this.
Byakuya had left the office without warning or any specified reason, but that did not mean Renji should have to stay. It was almost as good as saying Renji could disappear as well. Glancing around the room once more, he slid the heavy bolt into place, locking the door firmly and launched himself into shunpo - following the general direction of the reiatsu he had sensed barely minutes ago.
He reached the great wall that hid this small paradise from the bitter world of Rukongai before he felt it again. A faint flicker in his mind, and once he focused on it, it disappeared into nothingness. Is it even real? Steeling himself for the worst, he flash-stepped to the other side of the wall, following the distant sensation tugging at the furthest reaches of his mind.
His search took him to the outer reaches of the slums of crumbling Inuzuri, where Seireitei was a distant memory, hazy in the evening sky, masked by low grey clouds. There, he stood in the dusty street, having alighted next to one of the abandoned houses he had sheltered under when he had fought for survival here... with Rukia, and the others. He smiled fondly at the memory. Good, simple times then. Different world.
And this time he felt it, distinctly, and he grinned ferociously at the familiar feeling. He'd been right. He'd tracked Kuchiki-taichou this far, despite the fact that he was clearly suppressing his reiatsu to a degree. Renji felt childishly proud in his simple achievement, and quickly followed the reiatsu to its source.
He landed lightly, his inherent fierce grace cushioning him from making a much of a sound on the dry, grassy slope. To his astonishment, he realised he recognised the place where he was standing. He and Rukia had come here, to, pay their respects to the sleeping dead. His friend's tombs lay less than a hundred steps to his left, their presence hidden by strong trees and thick undergrowth. But that was not what held his attention. Renji suppressed the power that threatened to explode out of him, wanting to keep himself concealed - to allow to figure in front of him to continue, heedless of his intrusion. He watched in awed silence.
Byakuya... you...
Renji stared at the scene that lay before him, his face a picture of amazement, his fierce dark eyes rapt with intrigue as he gazed at the man who stood, unaware of his being there, only twenty paces away from him.
Byakuya was merely a silhouetted figure against a blood red sky. His black hair was whipped around him, waltzing with the wind. Sporadic sunbeams shone through the delicate branches of the cherry trees, creating a small halo around the slim man, bathing him in a golden light. Blossom cascaded from the trees that surrounded him in the strong wind, almost as if it were raining. Byakuya personified majestic.
...you're s' fuckin' beautiful.
About him spun a thousand dancing blades, glittering deadly in the fading sunlight, and Byakuya looked more hopelessly untouchable than Renji had ever seen him. This, this is why you're the captain of 6th. No one has a hope in beating you, ever. Not even Zaraki would come close.
Byakuya's pale, graceful hands brought Senbonzakura under effortless control, and she obeyed his every command, bringing about the controlled destruction that unfolded around them. Renji watched Byakuya's eyes narrow imperceptibly, and realised how difficult it was even for Byakuya to release his zanpakuto without alerting anyone to the fluctuations in his reiatsu.
Did anyone else sense you?
Renji was taken aback by the sheer power of the man who stood, oblivious to his existence, in front of him. I used t' think that I could surpass you.
As an observer, he witnessed the full effect of Byakuya's invincibility, and could not suppress the primal fear that rose slowly inside him.
I fought you. I forced you to call out your Bankai. thought Renji, puzzled. How th' fuck did I do that? I'm nowhere near you...
He looked down at his palms, calloused and scarred from extensive training and the ferocity of the battles he'd willingly fought. They were a stark contrast to the flawless elegant hands that gently clasped Senbonzakura's hilt.
We're too fuckin' different. I'll never be your equal.
For the briefest of moments, he forgot the world around him, instead mindlessly watching Byakuya move through the battle movements that Renji himself had learnt long ago, when he had been a student at the academy. He found the motions strangely nostalgic.
Byakuya completed each as perfectly as everyone else would expect - he held himself to a far higher standard in all disciplines than everyone else - and as a result of his dedicated efforts, he possessed a grace and poise that Renji knew no matter how hard he trained, would never belong to him. Byakuya did not have to think of it, he simply was. He did not have to strive for the perfection he achieved, it came naturally to him. Renji smiled, and rose, walking softly across the grass, his feet barely brushing the ground.
You've always been s'damn different t'everyone else... you're too powerful for the living world, but too precious for here. I wish I could hold you in my arms, in my heart forever.
Byakuya remained unaware of his lieutenant, and so Renji simply stood a few metres behind him. Watching as Byakuya's soft hair was swept back by the unforgiving wind. He stepped forward and wrapped strong arms around Byakuya's chest.
Byakuya reacted instinctively, switching automatically into the mindset he adopted during his battles. He hissed in surprise and tensed as he gathered Senbonzakura's deadly petals to converge on his attacker. He twisted, attempting to launch himself into shunpo, to shake off his attacker, and give himself some sort of...
...and then he heard quiet laughter. Byakuya scowled at the sound Renji's voice, carefully extricating himself from the rough embrace. He called Senbonzakura back to its sealed form and fixed his subordinate with cold, reproachful eyes.
Renji stretched and grinned unabashed, revelling in the sight of Byakuya standing in front of him, windswept and angry with his impulsiveness. He stepped towards his captain, and carefully disarming himself, he leant Zabimaru lovingly against a nearby tree.
"Sorry, Byakuya," he said, allowing himself to speak the name that he used only when they were alone, when they were together. Byakuya's eyes narrowed. "Didn't mean t'startle you."
Byakuya regarded his vice-captain haughtily before dropping his steely gaze. "I believe you are required elsewhere, Abarai-fukutaichou," replied Byakuya simply, making the statement a dismissal.
Renji however, was not to be so easily discouraged.
"Well... my shift's over, and I'm sure everyone else will get by fine without me. I'd rather spend my time here." he smiled brilliantly at Byakuya, and took another step closer, knowing that he it was the dignity and pride of Byakuya's station that forced Byakuya to remain as distant as he was, that held him tantalisingly close, yet still so impossibly far away. "I'd rather spend time with you."
A flash of amusement crossed Byakuya's eyes before it was quickly masked, and he sighed gently.
"Renji..." he began, but the words he meant to speak, the protest that Renji knew was coming, was cut off unexpectedly by Renji's mouth on his.
Renji felt Byakuya tense, and he gently caressed his slim neck with a gentle touch not many would think he could possess. Byakuya slowly relaxed, and leant against his vice's muscular body. They broke apart, and Renji's eyes were filled with desire. Byakuya nestled his head on the loose folds of the black shihakusho hiding his face against Renji's chest, listening to the comforting sound of a calm heartbeat.
"Renji, I do not think this is entirely appropriate," he said, not wanting to hurt the fierce man who cradled him so gently, and treated him as if he were an object to be treasured, as opposed to hated or feared.
Renji however, ignored him, instead pulling Byakuya closer, he cupped a hand under that elegant chin and tipped his lips down to meet Byakuya's. As soon as they met, gentle shocks of want and need spread through them, encouraging them in their desire and passion for each other.
Byakuya's hands found Renji's hair, and deft fingers let loose a fiery wave of crimson, silken strands spilled over Renji's broad shoulders and he felt an overwhelming sensation of need, of wanting to protect the man who had given himself entirely to him. He pulled Renji down closer to him, arching his back into Renji's supportive arms, taking delight in the feel of Renji's mouth, remembering the taste of his lips.
"Too long." said Renji huskily. "We haven't done this for far too long." Byakuya could only agree, even if his rank did not let him experience the warmth of feeling something for another being, even if his dignity refused to allow him to utter the sentiment aloud.
They were helpless in each other's presence, each desperately wanting to reveal themselves completely, but bound to walk entirely separate paths, and inhabit entirely separate worlds. They would never be able to reveal what they had to anyone, ever.
Renji sighed, inhaling Byakuya's clean, indeterminable scent, and he reached up slowly to remove the kenseikan - another reminder of the painful gap in status between them - from Byakuya's black hair, letting it flow loose in the wind. You are completely untouchable. He felt an elegant hand entwine itself in the tangled hair at the base of his neck, and he shivered with desire.
Byakuya had always been perfect. He had always been beautiful. He was regal, calm and composed, all the things one would only expect from someone of his position. But now, out here, in Rukongai, where Renji had breathed, laughed, and fought desperately for life, he was something else entirely. His dark hair was tousled carelessly by the wind, whipped across his pale features, hiding those grey eyes that sometimes appeared so uncharacteristically gentle. And yet, he remained as dangerous as ever, as powerful as ever, and as threatening. He emanated it from his very being. It was then that Renji realised that he would never change, no matter how much he or Byakuya desired it, they would always remain worlds apart.
Renji shivered again, unable to escape the small shocks of fear that ran through his system. He could break me in seconds. And I would never have the will to fight back. You have caught me Byakuya... I can never raise a hand to you, save in love.
"You're cold?" said Byakuya, the subtle rise in tone making it into a question. Renji grinned helplessly and leant forward to murmur against that pale mouth.
"I'm never cold when I'm with you," he whispered, kissing the corner of Byakuya's mouth gently. "That's a scientific impossibility... or somethin'."
Byakuya did not reply, but Renji felt the subtle upwards turn of the corners of his mouth, the faint shadow of a smile. The movement made pure need course through his body, and he placed thousands of chaste kisses to Byakuya's jawline and neck, claiming the captain as his own.
Byakuya moaned softly, almost inaudibly, and Renji's heart raced at the low noise. He relished the knowledge that no one, save him, could call forth those tones from the usually reticent captain. He must mean at least, a little, to Byakuya, perhaps.
Slim white hands slid deftly under his shihakusho, gliding across the hard edges of shoulders, and the muscles of Renji's battle-hardened chest. Fingers traced the black marks of his tattoos, leaving the muscles under Renji's skin burning with the fire of desire in their wake. The self-control Renji had fought so hard to maintain finally collapsed, and he fell backwards, pulling Byakuya down with him, cushioning his captain's fall with his own body. The surprise in Byakuya's eyes was quickly replaced with a gentle warmth.
It drove Renji into madness, and he pulled Byakuya's head down, claiming his mouth in one rough, swift movement. Their tongues met in a battle for dominance, and Renji heard himself groan into Byakuya's mouth, but did not recall making the sound.
There, his back pressed into the grassy ground, Byakuya's lithe, warm body leaning heavily on him, he felt like he was in his own small heaven. It could not have been more natural, more perfect if he had tried.
They were both panting when they broke away, and Renji smoothed back Byakuya's hair gently, baring his exquisite features, and attempting to convey the feelings he could not put into words in the simple movement. I belong to you, Byakuya.
They lay there for what felt like all of eternity, but barely the space of a heartbeat at the same time, just being. Renji's lean arms were wrapped around Byakuya's waist, pressing their hips together, Byakuya's hands found themselves buried deep in crimson hair. Their eyes were closed, foreheads resting against each other, barely touching as they breathed together, sharing breaths.
I could stay here forever.
Renji pressed his lips to Byakuya's gently, barely touching the other man. Byakuya however, had other ideas, and flicked his tongue lightly across Renji's bottom lip, asking for entrance. Renji yielded gladly, and Byakuya delved into the familiar warmth that was so strangely comforting. He reveled in the taste of Renji's mouth, at the naturalness of what was happening, and allowed Renji to roll them over, so it was him underneath, trapped under the broad frame of his vice-captain. Renji sucked on his tongue, teasing him purposely, and he felt his untouched arousal ache.
"Renji..." he whispered, ashamed of his desire, of his need for someone else. He was Kuchiki Byakuya, should anyone find out, that he had given part of his heart to another being... He shuddered at the thought of anything bad happening to Renji, and turned his face away from his vice-captain.
The movement did not go unnoticed, and Renji placed a hand under Byakuya's chin, pulling him back around until their gazes met. A melancholy grey connected with Renji's own fierce brown eyes, burning with passion.
"Don't do that to me," whispered Renji fiercely. "There is nothing about you I would change. Don't change yourself." This time they met slowly, the kiss deep and tender. When they broke apart, it lingered on their lips.
"Don't run from who you are," whispered Renji softly, into Byakuya's ear. "Not from me, not when we're alone. Don't close yourself off from me."
Rough hands pulled off Byakuya's haori, casting it from them upon the ground carelessly, and moved to loosen the black shihakusho. Renji's large hands worked with skill and deftness, and mere seconds passed before a pale chest was exposed to the last of the day's sunlight, Renji grinned helplessly at the sight, of Byakuya, lying beneath him, like this.
Byakuya was only like this for him.
He noticed a pale flush creep across Byakuya's cheeks as he gazed at him with an incredibly appreciative stare. Renji quickly attended to himself, and his shihakusho was quickly dismantled, falling to his waist as he leant down and trailed kisses across Byakuya's ribs.
He heard Byakuya's breath hitch as he traced collarbones with his tongue, and took no small pride in the fact that he could make the nobleman arch wantonly into him as he marked the sensitive skin of his hips with sharp teeth.
He sat up once more and undressed Byakuya completely. You're fucking unbelievable. He grinned again, and Byakuya pulled him down by his hair, their mouths meeting again. Renji could taste the salty tang of sweat on Byakuya, and took enjoyment in the small pleasure it brought him.
He rolled off Byakuya, pulling the lithe figure of the smaller man on top of him, tangling their feet together. Byakuya regarded him calmly with grey eyes before bending to the junction of neck and shoulder, to leave marks there that would last for longer than the brief respite of this beautiful evening.
"Renji," Byakuya whispered, resting his forehead against Renji's neck, inhaling the scent of his hair. Renji understood him, as he always did, and looked up at Byakuya questioningly. Byakuya simply held his gaze, answering his unspoken question.
Renji smiled gently, and caressed Byakuya's back with one hand, tracing the pattern of muscle and bone, mapping his skin with touch alone. The other hand cradled Byakuya's head, brushing through silken strands of loose hair, marveling at the ethereal beauty of the man he was with, here, right now.
He sat up, and placed two fingers in his mouth deliberately, sucking on them gently to cover them in a layer of slick saliva. Byakuya wondered if he knew how blatantly erotic the movement was, and his suspicions were confirmed by the wickedly playful look in Renji's eyes.
Renji shifted slightly, rolling Byakuya off him, onto the makeshift bed of his own shihakusho and gently eased Byakuya's legs apart. Then he reached up to capture his captain's mouth in a long, long kiss. Byakuya sighed against Renji's lips, and Renji gently pressed slick fingers inside. He felt Byakuya tense involuntarily underneath him, and simply waited for him to relax.
Byakuya's hands returned to tracing the tattoos along his back, and Renji devoted himself entirely to giving pleasure to his captain. His fingers moved deftly inside the other man, preparing him and searching for the spot that he knew would break down all the remaining restraints of Byakuya's rapidly diminishing barriers of dignity and pride.
Byakuya gasped beneath him, and arched into his touch. His eyes flickering closed as he shivered beneath Renji, lips slightly parted, his cheeks flushed. So fucking beautiful. Renji grinned, and gently withdrew, before moving to position himself. Long, lean legs wrapped themselves around his waist, and he pressed forward into tight heat.
Byakuya's lips tightened briefly as his body tensed, but Renji's mouth pressed against his so quickly that the brief pain of entry soon became a distant memory.
They moved as one, Renji going as slowly as he could manage wanting desperately for this to last forever. Beneath him, Byakuya rose to meet his thrusts, tightened his legs around Renji's waist to pull him deeper as he arched against the warm body on top of him.
Soft moans issued forth from Byakuya's mouth, and were quickly whipped away by the wind, but they sounded absurdly alien to him. He did not know he could make such sounds, that such noises would escape him, despite his best efforts to remain silent. But he found them echoed in Renji's own voice as his lieutenant moaned gently into Byakuya's ear.
Byakuya was painfully aware of his own untouched arousal, growing steadily hotter and more prominent from the friction of Renji's stomach. As always, Renji seemed able to read his very mind and reached down, grasping him firmly, and timing the movements of his hand to his own thrusts.
Beneath him Byakuya lay trembling with rapidly approaching pleasure, his silken hair clinging to his sweat-damp, flushed skin and tumbling free over the grass. His lips were slightly parted, and barely audible moans caressed Renji's ears. He placed a kiss to each of those closed eyes and watched as Byakuya's body arched up against him, tensing in the throes of release.
"Renji..." whispered Byakuya, as light as a gentle breeze, his eyes heavy-lidded with passion, and it was enough to send Renji over the edge.
Byakuya flinched involuntarily as Renji withdrew, and allowed himself to be held to Renji's bare chest. The warmth emanating from the fiery redhead drove away the cool bitterness of the wind, and Byakuya felt the comfort that seemed so alien to him alight upon his shoulders once more.
You do not even fathom your importance Renji, you do not know how close to my heart I hold you.
He nestled his face in Renji's strong neck and closed his eyes, his breath brushing against Renji's ear. Strong arms pulled on his shihakusho, before leaving him briefly to find his own.
They sat for a long moment like that, just watching each other, until Renji broke and gestured for Byakuya to come to him.
Above him, the last of the fading day gradually gave way to the approaching night, and the red sky slowly turned black. Renji gazed up at the countless stars, listening to the deep, slow breathing of Byakuya. And he realised that he truly did feel something for Byakuya, something that would drive him across the entire earth if Byakuya was ever taken from him, something that would drive him into a state of grief so destructive he would descend into madness if Byakuya ever lay under the cold, hard earth before his time. It excited and frightened him, and so he turned towards the object of his musings, driving those thoughts from his mind.
A few strands of Byakuya's black hair had drifted across his serene face, and Renji reached out tentatively to brush them back and smooth them gently into place. He felt a great bubble of happiness as Byakuya turned unconsciously into his touch, and he could not help but draw the slim figure gently towards him.
Byakuya's eyes opened very slightly, heavy with sleep and Renji gently kissed them closed again. He heard a satisfied sigh from Byakuya and smiled.
I will always be here for you. I will fight to keep you. You have given me reason to live, Byakuya.
And they lay like that, black and red strands hopelessly tangled, Byakuya's slender frame enveloped in Renji's warm arms, his head nestled against Renji's chest. And when sleep finally did approach Renji, spreading its welcoming arms wide, he fought the desire to go to it, wanting desperately to treasure one of these few snatched moments he had created for them both. He wanted to feel Byakuya against him, and watch how much younger and untroubled Byakuya's face became when he slept, as if he was leaving the heavy burdens of his life behind.
"I couldn't live without you," he whispered, safe in the knowledge that no one would hear the painfully needing words that he whispered into the night. And sleep finally took him...