"The Strange Attractions of Pete Kowalski"
By: Seinasu
Disclaimer: Bully is copyright © Rockstar and all others associated with legal rights.
Lance was making out with Angie. Gordon was sucking face with Christy. Johnny was smooching his ever beloved tramp--er, Lola.
Peter Kowalski felt extremely awkward being the only student not kissing anybody. He wasn't sure how he always ended up in these predicaments. One minute he was about to get a soda from the soda machine inside the main building when Lance walked over with Angie, the two of them holding hands. They suddenly stopped in front of Petey just as he turned away from the machine and started making out. So Petey was prepared to walk around them when Gordon suddenly showed up with his arm around Christy. He stopped them in front of Petey and started making out with the red head. Frustrated, Petey was going to turn the other way and leave when out of nowhere, Johnny and Lola appeared! Johnny slammed Lola against the soda machine and pressed his lips against hers, hungrily searching for her tongue.
Get me out of here! Petey thought as he squatted on the floor, unable to move. He was trapped on all sides and no matter how hard he pressed his hands against his ears, he could still hear the sloppy, wet kisses of the three couples.
Not a moment too soon, the biology teacher Dr. Slawter appeared from the bottom of the staircase and quickly took notice of the students.
"Procreation is not to be done within school property!" Dr. Slawter reprimanded. "All of you will leave now!"
There IS a god, Petey thought with relief as he crawled his way through the couples' legs that seemingly surrounded him like a forest and swiftly scrambled out of the building. Once outside, he sat next to the other soda machine and breathed a heavy sigh of relief.
Why do these people feel the need to make out anywhere? It looked like there was no romance to it. Just pick a spot and make out. "Oh, honey, this looks like a pile of smelly garbage—let's make out on top of it!" Brother. If I had a person to make out with, I'd try to make it at a place that would MAKE me want to make out with them. Who would've thought a soda machine was make out worthy.
Petey did a mental countdown before he climbed back to his feet. But once doing so, he found himself standing before another couple kissing and fondling one another. This time, it was Derby and Pinky.
"Ohhh, Derby," Pinky moaned as she wrapped her arms around the blonde Prep's neck. "Your kisses... they're so dangerous today!"
"We keep our best secrets in the family, don't we?" Derby whispered huskily as he started showering kisses along his cousin's neck.
Petey's swallowed what bile he felt was crawling up his throat. He took two steps to the side and started running down the stairs. As he round the corner over to the library, he skidded to a halt and as he almost piled into Trent and Kirby making out against the wall.
Trent paused from his kissing session and threw Petey a nasty glare.
"Beat it, Kowalski!"
Kirby snickered. "Yeah, Petey. Unless you want these big guns of mine to teach you to interfere with my uh, homework assignment."
"Homework?!" Trent frowned at his partner. "The hell's that supposed to mean, Kirby?"
"Hey! I didn't say anything wrong!"
"I thought you weren't gonna be ashamed anymore..."
Petey felt vertigo about to kick into overdrive. He decided to summon what little of his sanity was left and run away. He backtracked to the main building and then head over to the Boys Dorm.
If I can make it to my room, I'll be safe!
But he knew nothing he thought of could ever go as planned, for when he stepped through the archway, he saw Ted and Mandy going at it on the stairway leading into the dorm.
"WHAT?!" Petey cried in disbelief. "You guys are supposed to be at the gym or football field! Why? Why? WHY?!"
Of course the king and queen of the Jocks didn't hear his whining. Petey moaned and turned away from the sight, only to see Jimmy just a few feet away presenting Zoe with a bouquet of flowers. Zoe took the flowers with kind and smiled knowingly at Jimmy.
Oh no, no, no, no, no, Petey thought in horror. Flowers equal gratuity. The gratuity leads to a kiss. The kiss leads to making out in front of ME—again!
Everything went into slow motion for young Kowalski. He ran as fast as his legs could push him even though it felt like an eternity before he started moving. He cried out, "Nooo!" and stretched his arms out, despite the fact that they weighed like lead. The flowers from Zoe's hand were dropped slowly and lifelessly to the ground. Unfortunately, Petey didn't realize that Jimmy had zoned in on Zoe's lips for the kiss, and seeing as how Petey was now wedged between him and Zoe, he instead took Jimmy's kiss.
Zoe backed away a few steps as Jimmy realized what just happened. Meanwhile Petey's face was bright red and he remained paralyzed in his spot as reality was set back into its normal spin of motion.
What... just happened? Petey thought as he watched Jimmy's expression change from mild interest into extreme annoyance. What did I just do?! Focus on the flowers on the ground. Focus! Oh no, Jimmy's stepped on them! Look away, Pete. Look away! Oh no, Eunice is throwing herself onto Pedro. Oh god, what Jimmy saw in the bathroom WAS true! Stop thinking about Jimmy!
"The hell did you do that for, Petey?!" Jimmy exclaimed. "Jeez, I actually bought those stupid flowers too instead of stealing them like I always do!"
"Sorry, Jimmy," Petey apologized, still unable to move from his spot. "I guess I got a little carried away."
"Sheesh, you're kidding me! You should become an actor with moves like that."
Petey's face brightened. "You think so, huh? Well..."
Jimmy snorted as he ruffled the smaller boy's head. "Yeah, sure, move to Hollywood or why not join the drama club? I'm gonna take off. Come on, Zoe."
The tall red head gave Petey a funny look as she followed Jimmy away from the Boys Dorm. After they left, Petey bent down and picked up one of the flowers Jimmy stepped on. His cheeks were still rosy and his lips soft and warm from the kiss.
My first kiss was with Jimmy. Oh man... That was weird but... I guess I can see why people like making out so much. I hope I can try it again someday soon!
Attraction was good in small doses. For Pete Kowalski, this day of massive attraction did him justice.
THE END