Tavros
Nobody ever understands what it's like to be confined to a wheelchair. To never be able to depend solely on yourself, never be able to walk. I felt completely alone in the world.
Add in some low self confidence and a bad stutter and you've got the formula for depression, which is what I've been diagnosed with, at age fourteen.
I haven't tried to kill myself or anything, I still value my life a little, I just have been worrying my parents by being so out of it lately.
I stared out of the window as we drove to the mental hospital, neither of us tried to talk. My backpack rested in my lap, and it contained everything I would need to live for the next, what, three, four months? I had no idea how long I would have to stay here, until I was deemed healthy. Of course I didn't really want to be going here, no teenager would, but I hoped for the sake of my mom that it helped and I could be the son she always wanted.
When we pulled into the parking lot I could finally see the huge institute. It was a square building with many stories and windows. It was plain with brick walls, nothing fancy, which I was used to. Growing up with a single parent left us barely getting by most of the time. I didn't even want to think about how much it was costing for my mom to send me here.
I sat in the car while my mom walked around to the trunk and pulled my heavy wheelchair out. She popped it open the rolled it over to my door, then began the complicated process of pulling me out of the car and into my wheelchair. I'm pretty small for my age, but I'm still bigger than my tiny mother and there was no way she could lift me up. I sort of had to reach out and hold on to the handles, then pull myself into the wheelchair. After I was finally situated I was completely situated. I didn't think I had enough energy to wheel myself up to the door. Thankfully my mother realized this and started to push me towards the building.
The inside of the building was just as plain as the outside. Everything was mostly an ugly off white color, with touches of olive green here and there. My mom pushed me up to the front desk and spoke to the receptionist, "I'm here to check my son Tavros Nitram in." The woman behind the desk looked at her neutrally, then handed her a clipboard.
"Fill these out and the doctor will be here to conference with you soon. I'll take Tavros to his room so he can get unpacked. Tavros, please follow me."
The blonde walked out from behind the desk and began walking quite quickly down a long corridor. I turned to say goodbye to my mom. She gave me a hug and whispered, "I love you," in my ear. The blonde woman turned around and saw that I wasn't following her.
"Hurry along Tavros!" She waited as I rolled up to her, then began walking away quickly again. I wished she would slow down, but I didn't say anything.
After a short elevator ride to the fourth floor we walked down a hallway with identical white doors lining each side. The woman stopped in front of one on the left and opened the door, letting me go in ahead of her. She flicked the lights on a illuminated the room. It wasn't much, a white metal framed bed with white sheets, a white nightstand with a white bedside lamp, and a chair with a small table. Three sides were bordered by white walls, by on the left there wasn't a wall, just a curtain like the ones that divide to hospital beds. Well, this is a hospital and these are beds, so I guess that is exactly what the curtain is. The thought almost made me laughed, but I haven't laughed in a while.
The lady saw me staring at the curtain, "Yes, you will have a roommate. We find that patients with certain disorders such as your depression benefit greatly from having someone to room with. The curtain can give you privacy though."
I wheeled over to the bed, setting my backpack on it. "I'll just leave you to it then. Someone should be back up in about twenty minutes to take you down to dinner. If you need anything before then or have any questions, just hit this button," She pointed to one by the light switch. "My name is nurse Lalonde by the way, alright, goodbye." Nurse Lalonde took her cue and left.
I stared up at the button she had indicated. It was way too high up for me to reach, as was the light switch. What if something happened? How would I get help? My breathing picked up in a panic. The sound of a door slamming spooked me and I let out a little shriek. The curtain ruffled and a face peeked out from it.
"Bro? You ok?" The voice was kind of funny sounding. Like a laugh was bubbling just beneath the surface.
"W-who a-a-a-a-are you?" I finally got out. My stutter was acting up greatly today.
"My friends call me Gamzee."The boy came out from behind the curtain and I could see just how tall he was. Probably six foot four, he was a giant. "What be yours?"
"Uhhh," I couldn't think. "Tavros."
He smiled at me and clown like smile. "Nice to meet you Tavros."
I smiled weakly back, then remembered I was supposed to be putting my things away. I zipped open my backpack and put my clothes in the drawer by my bed. Gamzee stood there and watched me.
"You haven't seen Karkat have you? He promised me he'd help me figure out something that rhymes with orange."
"Uhhh," I stared at him blankly. "What's a Karkat?"
The boy laughed. "I forgot that you just got here my brother."
I didn't respond. I waited patiently for the person to come who was supposed to collect me."
"Are you just going to all up and sit there for the rest of your life?"
"N-no, I'm waiting for someone."
"Well, that's boring. Let's go do something fun bro."
"Uhh, I don't-," Before I knew what was going on, Gamzee grabbed my wheelchair and pushed me out the door. I tried to press the call button on our way out, but I couldn't reach, just as I had thought.
"W-w-w-where are we going?" I said nervously.
"You'll see. Don't worry." Gamzee chuckled.
We went back down on the elevator to the second floor, and then through a door labeled Rec Room.
"Hey everybody!" Gamzee called as walked in. "I want you guys to meet my best bro, Tavros."
The teens scattered throughout the room stared at me. I let out a little squeak, wanting somewhere to hide. I felt like I was back in school, where everyone was staring and calling me all of those terrible names..
"Hello there Tavros, my name is Aradia, it's a pleasure to meet you." A girl with wispy features and long hair greeted me. I took a deep breath, seeing that at least some people here were nice.
Gamzee pushed me over to a card table where four teenagers sat, arguing about something. "Tavros, this is Karkat, Terezi, Sollux and Vriska." They didn't even look about, just continued to biker about who knows what.
I looked up at Gamzee. "Don't worry bro," He reassured me. "They're cool once you get to know them, promise."
A bell suddenly rang which scared me and I let out a scream. Gamzee laughed, "it's just the dinner bell my brother, you need to calm down."
I remembered that the nurse had said that someone was going to get me from dinner. I was supposed to be in my room! What was going to happen down? I really should've said something to Gamzee, but I didn't.
Everyone in the room quietly got up and filled out of the room. The short boy who Gamzee had called Karkat walked next to us. "I thought of something that rhymes with orange, door hinge." His voice was sort of scratchy, and it sounded low and high at the same time. He had messy hair and was probably 5 foot four, Gamzee towered over him about a foot.
"Thanks brother." Gamzee smiled.
"Whatever," Karkat muttered. "So who's the paraplegic?"
"He's my new roommate, you know, after what happened to Aranea.."
"Yeah, we don't have to talk about it Gamzee."
We reached the dining hall, it was on the same floor as the rec room. I was still worried about getting in trouble for leaving my room. There was quite a long line already for dinner. Gamzee and Karkat were talking about how they were going to spend their evening activity time, I think they decided on playing cards. When we finally reached the beginning of the long buffet, Gamzee grabbed to trays. "I'll set you up with the good eats they got around here bro." I smiled at him, thankful that I didn't have to try to serve myself. There was lots of food, first main dishes like burgers, pizza, and spaghetti. Next was vegetables, they had salads and cooked veggies. Then there was fresh fruit salad or apples or kiwis. Then they had dinner rolls or French fries or macaroni and cheese. At the end of the line were deserts. They had chocolate cake, raspberry pie and brownies. I had never seen such good food. I mean my mother had always tried the best she could, but it was hard for her to get enough money to buy anything like this and she was an awful cook.
Karkat lead Gamzee and I over to a table near the back of the dining hall. Gamzee pushed my wheelchair up to the table, the set my tray in front of me. I reached for my fork, and then stopped. Gamzee had his head bowed and appeared to be praying. I looked over to Karkat, but he just sat there silently and waited. I did the same, not sure what else to do.
Gamzee sat up after a few seconds and opened his eyes. "My brothers, how many times do I have to tell you that you don't have to wait for me?" He said a bit agitated. "Praying is between me and the messiahs."
I didn't really know what he was saying, but I didn't want to offend him, so I just quietly started eating. A girl who I remembered was named Terezi came and joined us at the table.
"Tavros," She said in a psychotic voice. "Can I trade you your red jell-o for my blue one? There wasn't any red left and it's my very favorite color." I stared at her through her red glasses, then slowly handed my jell-o over.
"Thank-you," She grinned creepily. I don't know why, but she seemed more friendly that creepy to me, regardless of her voice.
"You're welcome," I murmured.
"So," Terezi continued, "You guys are going to be playing euchre tonight, am I right? Because I need a team mate since they decided Vriska couldn't play anymore. Karkles?"
"No way in hell. You suck at euchre and besides, Sollux and I are already team mates." Karkat responded.
"Fine. Gamzee, how do you feel about ditching Aradia to be my partner?"
"Well, that would be good and all, but me and Aradia already got miracles going on." Gamzee also turned her down.
Terezi's stare then went to me. "Oh Tavros! You don't have a partner! It's decided then, we're team mates!"
I didn't know how to play euchre and I didn't really want to be anyone's teammate, but I didn't say anything.
When we were all done with dinner we left our trays on the table and went back to the rec room which had been completely transformed. There were lots of card tables set up with four chairs at each and a deck of cards in the middle of each table. Apparently it was set up to play euchre with. Gamzee continued to push me over to a table at which he moved the chair out so I could fit. Terezi sat across from me. I thought Gamzee would sit with us, but he went and sat at a table across from Aradia.
"Do you know how to play this game?" Terezi asked. I guiltily shook my head. I hope she wouldn't be too mad.
To my surprise, Terezi didn't get angry at all. She just calmly explained the rules to me. "You see," She began. "You get five cards each round. You play a card each trick and there are five tricks in the round. You win a trick by playing the highest card. T-," Terezi stopped suddenly as a boy about five foot eleven and a girl who was even shorter than Karkat took their seat. The boy had on large glasses and had a stripe down the center of his hair dyed purple. The girl had long flowing curly hair and was skinnier than any girl I'd ever seen before.
"Hi! What's your name? I'm Feferi and this is Eridan! It's nice to meet you! It's so exciting having a new friend here!"
"Uhh, uhh, uhh," I stuttered.
Terezi came to my rescue, "His name is Tavros and he's shy, so don't scare him Feferi. He and Gamzee are roommates so he's going to be freaked out enough as it is."
Feferi nodded and Eridan began passing the cards out. "Tav, wwhy don't you tell us wwhy you're here?" Eridan said strangely. I couldn't tell if he had a lisp, was stuttering, or had some kind of accent.
"Eridan!" Feferi shouted. "Don't be so rude! That's a private matter and he doesn't have to tell us if he doesn't want to.
"No, that's ok. I'm here because I was diagnosed with depression and my mom was worried." I said quietly.
Terezi laughed, "That's not so bad! Some of us are totally messed up! You got it pretty good!" Feferi smiled in agreement.