Lousy oneshot. Enjoy~

-----

In all my life as a human, I would have never imagined things turning out quite like they did.

Touching my dark, scaly hand lightly, I examined myself in a puddle. This was the first time I could examine myself in several months, seeing as the Shinigami realm had nothing with a reflective surface in which I could examine myself with. A reptile-like head sat on my well-muscled shoulders, accompanied with a, what seems to be, bone helmet with three spikes pointing backwards. Yellow, feline-looking irises replaced my once human cinnamon ones. I stood taller than I once did, my lanky body stretching to what I estimated as 6 foot 6. My entire lower body was wrapped in bandages, the only things I wore beside a black vest with a fluffed collar and a studded black belt, my determined outfit from when I entered the Shinigami realm. In other words, I was damned with this stupid vest for the rest of eternity. Powerful haunches replaced my weak human legs, and I was proud that my jumping distance rivaled Ryuk's flying ability. I admit I am a vain creature, so I was content with staring at my reflection for a bit. There was one thing I didn't like about my appearance in general that I was already aware of, even in the Shinigami realm. On the thick tail that streamed from my lower back, a third hand had grown at the end of it. Although practical, I had disliked my third "arm" immediately after I entered the Shinigami realm.

The Shinigami laughed slightly to himself, savoring every moment of this. Ryuk had written in the book that anyone who used the Death Note would be damned to going to neither Heaven nor Hell. No, they got sent somewhere even better. The Shinigami realm. Once I had woken up for the first time there, Ryuk had explained that he had left out a key piece of information from the rules on the Death Note. He went on to say that since I had owned his Death Note in the human world, it was his duty to explain the rules and such of being a Shinigami, but he said he didn't feel like it and never talked about it since.

I remember, at first, I was enraged. I had died at the hands of a common criminal, shot in the head while Ryuuzaki and I were investigating a possible warehouse for illegal heroin distribution. They had hidden and one had sprung me and stuck a gun to my head before I could react. He yelled for no one to move, but someone did. One of his own teammates. In his feverish panic, he had pulled the trigger, effectively scrambling my brains and killing me instantly.

So, there I sat, in the Shinigami realm. No longer I killed for a reason other than to be amused or to extend my life. The other Shinigami scoffed at me, telling me I work to hard. They were lazy fools, so I paid no mind to their constant pestering. But, eventually, I cracked. It was so...boring. I had left the human world for too long, letting chaos rule Japan once again. Criminals littered the once peaceful streets. Streets that Kira once ruled with an iron fist, I remember thinking bitterly.

At last, bored out of my mind, I stood in a huff and picked up my Death Note and headed off for Ryuk. The idiot wasn't that hard to find; he was sitting by an apple tree, scrunching his face as he ate a grainy dried apple.

"Ryuk," I asked coolly, "I'm heading off to the Human Realm. Any helpful information you can offer me before I go? I'd hate to go there and disintegrate into ashes from stepping into the sunlight because my idiot of a friend forgot to tell my that shinigami can't tolerate sunlight."

Ryuk snickered, staring at me with those big yellow eyes I had found repulsive as a human before he took another loud crunch from the apple. He swallowed, then threw the core at me and stood up. "No need to snap like that, Light. Just stay away from garlic and wooden stakes." He laughed like a maniac at his own bad joke before wiping an invisible tear from his eye and continuing, "but seriously, if you meet any hot women, don't get too feisty with 'em or you'll turn to dust. Can you bring me some apples back from the human world?" I snorted at him, turning away and jumping into the portal I had created to the human realm.

Which lead to now. Ripping my gaze from the murky puddle I was staring at, I sadly gazed at the building in front of me. The place I had once called home. The place I had grown up in, taking care of my little sister and comforting my mother. The place where I would wait patiently each day for my father to come home so I could ask him to play piano with me, only to end up helping him solve one of his cases instead. The place where I had become a monster.

What was that? Straining my ears to hear over the patter of the rain, I could make out the soft chime of piano keys. Phasing through my front door, an advantage to being a shinigami, I padded curiously towards the piano room.

There sat Sayu, staring at the sheet music with such intensity and concentration that the paper could have burst into flames then and there. I smiled gingerly, fondly remembering all that time I spent why my little sister, painstakingly teaching her how to play the piano with me. She learned slowly, but she got good eventually. I remember spending hours standing behind her, taking her dainty hands into mine and playing the keys together. And when she finally learned the piece, she would smile from ear to ear and throw her arms around me, thanking me.

I stood in the doorway for awhile, listening to Sayu struggle on one part of the piece again and again until I decided to take action. Sliding forward gracefully, I took my large, scaly hands on her delicate human ones and played the correct notes with her. I let go, and she tried again, succeeding this time without my help.

A fuzzy warmness spread through my body as that same smile grew on her pretty little face. She played the piece continuously, then abruptly stooped.

"You know, Light-kun, I hadn't liked playing the piano when you first taught me," Sayu confessed, startling me slightly. How did she know I was here? She continued, "But I did love how you would hold my hands and help me. Remember that?" she laughed, a dry, broken laugh, "I loved it. The only reason I still play the piano now is because I can remember you as if you were still alive. As if you were here right now." I exhaled in relief; she was talking to herself.

"Call me crazy, big brother, but I could have sworn I felt you holding my hands when I was playing for a moment. I wish you were alive for just a minute, just a second, so I could have you," Sayu trailed off, a dainty finger tracing one of the ivory piano keys before whispering, "so you could hold my hand one more time."

I wanted so badly to be alive. I wanted nothing more than to wrap my arms around my little sister, to run my fingers through her hair and protect her. I wished so badly to cast away all the evil around her and let Sayu live the happy, bliss-filled world that she deserved. If I could be become alive for just five minutes, even if it means I would be damned to Mu forever.

Just so I could hold my little sister's hand one more time.