Brackenpelt woke with a sharp nudge to his side. He opened his eyes slowly to savor the look of Snowlight in her morning beauty. She smelled of parsley and borage leaves, a strange combination. He nervously met her eyes, expecting to see sorrow rounded in her gentle blue eyes. Instead he found excitement. This only left him to wonder — what has happened? He quickly rose to his paws without a word, following her out of the add-on warriors' den. They and a few of the other older warriors had moved to make room for the younger ones. Kits were growing up so fast. A sharp sense of grief weighed on his shoulders. He missed his daughters that would never see the blue sky. They would never see the green forest or the white of winter. They wouldn't ever hunt or learn to fight — or heal, maybe. Brackenpelt's tail dropped in sorrow. He wondered how Snowlight could've ever gotten over their deaths so quickly.
Oddly enough, he didn't have to wait long for an answer. The bright sun temporarily blinded him. Wildsong stood protectively in front of a kit he'd never seen before. The kit was a small, tortoiseshell she-cat. She looked around with wide, scared green eyes. She could only be hardly a moon old. Wildsong curled her lip in the slightest at Brackenpelt as to slip Snowlight's attention. But Snowlight only had eyes for the kit.
"Where'd she come from?" Brackenpelt asked, wondering, for one heartbeat, if it was Wildsong's own. He brushed the thought away as soon as it came. Wildsong would be the last she-cat any tom in IceClan could tolerate. Brackenpelt knew this for a fact. Besides, Wildsong wasn't one for flirting or even much of chatting.
"Wildsong found the poor thing abandoned near the border," Snowlight whispered, her blue gaze eyeing up the kit. She looked as if she'd forgotten their own kits' deaths. She seemed to be forgetting that Rosekit and Cloudkit were in StarClan now. Brackenpelt ached inside. He didn't want his daughters to be replaced by a rogue's kit!
Wildsong seemed to sense his thoughts. "I was hoping Snowlight would mother this little one, as I cannot provide for her in those queenly ways. She will never replace your daughters, but you could think of her as their sister."
Snowlight let out a squeal of happiness. She didn't seem to be paying any mind to anyone other than the kit, who was now sniffing the air curiously. "Primrosekit!" Snowlight meowed so abruptly Brackenpelt flinched. "That's her name! Primrosekit!"
Brackenpelt flattened his ears, letting out a growl that finally earned his mate's attention. "No, Snowlight! You can't name her after Rosekit! No! I won't allow it!"
"You aren't her father!" Snowlight snapped, her blue eyes blazing. "Why should I listen to you? I said her name is Primrosekit! If you have a problem with that, I suggest you move to GoldenClan!"
It was such a small thing, but Brackenpelt saw Wildsong's eyes widen in alarm at Snowlight's mention of GoldenClan. He ignored that little detail and turned back to Snowlight. "A mother is probably worried sick for her kit! Maybe she went hunting and left the kit by itself for a little bit. Maybe she was coming right back. You, Snowlight, of all cats should know how hard it is to lose a kit!"
Snowlight looked as if Brackenpelt had just scorched her with his words. She recoiled from him, baring her fangs in a way that made Brackenpelt's heart clench. He should feel sorry for hurting her feelings. But he didn't. He only felt sorrow — sorrow for his dead daughters and for his fading love for Snowlight.
~.~
Brackenpelt sighed, heading over to the medicine den where Toadspots had called him. As he passed the nursery, he heard Snowlight's coos to Primrosekit. She was so happy, happier than she had been when Rosekit and Cloudkit were born. This fact drove Brackenpelt sleepless at night. He tossed and turned in his nest, picturing Snowlight and his daughters every time he closed his eyes. It was so hard. He wanted Snowlight to grief, too.
"What do you want, Toadspots?" he asked halfheartedly, his mind set on other things. Rosekit and Cloudkit had died in this very den. Every trace of them had been rid of, though. Their nests were rotting somewhere in the forest and the wind had carried any tufts of loose fur. They had been so small, so much younger than Primrosekit. They had been beautiful, too. Cloudkit had been white like Snowlight. Rosekit had been dark ginger. They hadn't even opened their eyes before they died. Brackenpelt would never know what colors were behind those closed eyelids.
"We're going to GoldenClan. I need more borage leaves and they don't grow around here. Softfeather is expecting kits now, too." Toadspots glanced around, as if he had forgotten something. Brackenpelt knew he had, though it wasn't what he was now looking for. Toadspots had forgotten that because he had been unwilling to try and cure Rosekit and Cloudkit, they'd died. He'd said that they were too far gone to try. He'd given up.
"Why do you need me?" Brackenpelt growled. "You know the way yourself."
Toadspots narrowed his cold, calculating green eyes. "Mudstar demands that I bring an escort. Tensions are high with GoldenClan. Those faultless-frauds are probably fretting over some morsel of prey that a desperate apprentice stole."
"Well, let's get a move on! We're wasting daylight!" Brackenpelt grumbled, leaving the medicine den with Toadspots on his heels. He led the dark brown tabby out of camp and started toward GoldenClan border.
The forest around them was in new-leaf bloom. Rosekit and Cloudkit had been born on one of the later days of leaf-bare, but had caught greencough within a day. Snowlight had caught it, too, but she had been stronger. Toadspots had saved her and not the kits, despite her pleas to give the catmint to her daughters. Where is that Snowlight now? Brackenpelt curled his lip. She was ogling over Primrosekit! Primrosekit seemed to be all Snowlight cared about these days!
"I've been trying to have a conversation with you since we entered the forest and you've given a blank stare in reply!" Toadspots was babbling again. Brackenpelt didn't want to hear him. He wanted to ignore the medicine cat just as he had ignored Brackenpelt's daughters' need for catmint. Rosekit and Cloudkit were hunting and learning among the stars, watching with eyes Brackenpelt had never seen.
The trek to the border was a quiet one, though Brackenpelt's thoughts were whirling. So much pain plagued his heart, the gentle thudding in his chest reminding him why he needed to be alive. Rosekit and Cloudkit wouldn't want him to give up. For them and them alone he fought the depressing ideas he got. Snowlight used to be his drive, but she was gone, too. It was as if her spirit lifted to StarClan as their daughters' did. She wasn't the same anymore. Their death had changed her, had turned her inside out. Before Primrosekit, Snowlight was buried so deep in misery that she refused to move on. Brackenpelt hadn't felt alone in his grieving then. But now he was.
~.~
GoldenClan camp was very sullen. Grief weighed like a blanket of snow on their shoulders, making a very gloomy atmosphere. Bracknpelt felt choked by all this sadness, from his own and now the misery of GoldenClan. But the warriors of GoldenClan were still hostile, eyeing Brackenpelt and Toadspots as if they were a mere piece of fresh-kill. The fur on Brackenpelt's neck-fur rose and he clung to Toadspots like a burr, wishing he could share the medicine cat's ignorance for once. Just this once he wished for more ignorance.
"Well, look what Prowlstep and Brightflame dragged in!" a warrior snarled, watching them with menacing eyes.
Brackenpelt bristled, casting a hard glare at the tom with curly russet fur.
Prowlstep gave his Clanmate a hard bat to the ears. "Quiet, Curlypelt! Toadspots is a medicine cat and needs to see Emberleaf."
Perhaps at the sound of her name, Emberleaf emerged from a den hidden by ivy vines. Her den was a smooth, rounded cavern carved into the cliffside. Brackenpelt would never want to sleep in a den with the whole weight of the rocky cliffside above you. But, obviously, Emberleaf didn't seem to mind. She strode over to Toadspots, her pelt gleaming in the sunlight. Her amber eyes were not hazed by grief of any sort, unlike many of the others.
"Borage?" she asked, her voice so high it sounded young. At Toadspots's nod, she turned and disappeared into her den.
As they waited, two kits ventured out of what Brackenpelt guessed was the nursery. They were about Primrosekit's age, so small and curious. One of them was white and the other was dark ginger. They both had green eyes. Brackenpelt found himself reminded of Cloudkit and Rosekit. A queen — most likely their mother — hurried out after them. "Get back inside, Redkit and Whitekit!" she scolded. "You don't want to get lost like Specklekit!"
Specklekit's name struck something in GoldenClan and everything became hush. Brackenpelt felt very out of place here. Even Curlypelt lowered his head, sadness weighing on his shoulders. Brackenpelt had strong grief, but that was nothing compared to the level GoldenClan's had sunk to.
The two kits headed back into the nursery with a sigh, with the overly worried queen at their heels. Brackenpelt stared after them, wishing Snowlight could see how concerned a real mother should be. Primrosekit would never replace Cloudkit or Rosekit. Primrosekit couldn't ever be their sister, either.
~.~
A moon had passed. Primrosekit was beginning to feel more and more like her own. Snowlight sighed, watching as the tortoiseshell she-cat slumbered at her side. She wondered about Primrosekit, about her family. What was her mother like? Did she really mean to come back? Sometimes Snowlight thought about how Brackenpelt could've been right. Brackenpelt. Oh, poor Brackenpelt. She missed his company, even though Primrosekit took up most of her time.
Wildsong entered the den, checking up on Primrosekit as she had made a habit of everyday this past moon. "How is she?" Wildsong always asked. Today was no exception. The question rang through the air and Snowlight replied as she always had: "Just lovely." Wildsong would then inspect Primrosekit with a controlled gaze, keeping her thoughts away from watching eyes. Snowlight often wondered what she was thinking. Wildsong then left the den without a word.
Snowlight wished that Brackenpelt would visit her, just once. She wanted to tell him what progress Primrosekit was making: how far she'd ventured out of the nursery, what things she'd learned, and how many cats she'd met. But most of all Snowlight longed to tell him that she still missed Rosekit and Cloudkit every day this past moon. She tried so hard to push out all her grief, focusing on Primrosekit with more attention than need be. But when Brackenpelt looked her in the eyes she saw that griefless she-cat that he was seeing. Snowlight wanted to tell him that she was sorry for excluding him, that he couldn't act in as Primrosekit's father.
It pained Snowlight most to see him avoiding her, to watch him as he kept his distance. Brackenpelt had never been like that before, but Snowlight knew what pain she caused him.
Just once, she wished he would visit her. If he would, then she could tell him those simple words: I'm sorry.
~.~
That night, when Brackenpelt was putting two and two together, the answer came like a mouse that leaped into his paws. He suddenly knew why GoldenClan was so sad, why Wildsong was so wary. What he didn't know, is how to go about announcing this to Snowlight. She'd be heartbroken even more and Brackenpelt did not want to be the bearer of bad news. The solution came to him: Wildsong would tell her. After all, Wildsong had been the liar from the start. She'd been the abductor.
He couldn't sleep, knowing this new fact. His grief slipped into his new hunger for answers. He rose from his nest and found Wildsong in the mesh of dark furs by her scent. Brackenpelt prodded her just as sharply as Snowlight had that long ago day when Primrosekit entered his life. She woke slowly, muttering a response so groggily that Brackenpelt couldn't decipher it. When Wildsong realized it was him, she curled her lip, but followed him all the same.
Brackenpelt led Wildsong just out of camp, passing the night guard with a nod. The half-moon's light was shining bright, dappling the clearing with silver gloss. Wildsong's pale gray pelt seemed to shimmer, as if she were a StarClan cat. But Brackenpelt knew darker things about her.
Wildsong looked at him through blue eyes, eyes so similar to Snowlight's. Her eyes reflected not fear, but amusement. It was all too clear that she knew his intentions. "You think I stole Primrosekit from GoldenClan? You're right, I did. But you know what? There's nothing you can do about it. Snowlight would only be further crushed if you took Primrosekit away from her. We both know that she prefers my company over yours right now. Why would she listen to you? You tried to get her to name the kit something else, something not like Rosekit. Look where that put you! Here you are, trying to play hero in a story you don't even know!"
"Primrosekit doesn't belong here!" Brackenpelt spat. "Nor do you! It is wrong to steal another queen's kit! If Snowlight knew what you'd done, she'd understand! I know her better than you do!"
"Such brave words." Wildsong let out a hiss. "But do you think StarClan thought twice before stealing your daughters? They took their precious lives for themselves! Primrosekit is what I call revenge, Brackenpelt! You should be grateful for me, giving you a family once more! I could only carry one, but Primrosekit filled Snowlight's heart much more than two kits!"
Brackenpelt unsheathed his claws. "You can't drag my daughters into this! It was Toadspots's fault they died, not StarClan's! Not all kits survive! It . . . It was their fate."
"Fate?" Wildsong echoed. "Since when do warriors ever believe in fate? Brackenpelt, get your head out of the clouds! This isn't a nursery tale where everything ends happily! This is life and life isn't fair! Fate is something you decide. Do you think Rosekit and Cloudkit decided to die? No! StarClan took their lives! Primrosekit is payback!"
Brackenpelt was breathless. He only managed to stutter: "Snowlight . . . will . . . understand!"
Wildsong's claws slid out. "Nice try, but I'm not about to get framed for 'kit-burglar'. If you as so much as speak one word about this, prepare to join your precious daughters."
~.~
Snowlight woke with a start. Primrosekit was nudging her side, staring into Snowlight's eyes with much confusion. "Where are Redkit and Whitekit?" Primrosekit asked, her voice high and squeaky. She watched Snowlight curiously, waiting.
Snowlight couldn't believe her ears. Is she talking about other Clan kits? "Who do you mean?' she prompted gently, trying to hide her surprise.
"Redkit and Whitekit," Primrosekit chirped.
Snowlight sighed, curling her tail around the tortoiseshell she-cat. "There is no Redkit or Whitekit. There's only you and Softfeather's kits."
~.~
Brackenpelt ached inside. This was the pain of bearing a secret. Wildsong cast him evil glares. One time he found mouse bones in his nest. What a horrid she-cat! Brackenpelt wondered how anyone in IceClan could tolerate her. He longed for the day when Mudstar to gather everyone and say: "Wildsong is evil and a traitor! We shall banish her now before she can hurt anyone else!" But Mudstar would never say those words because: she didn't know, technically Wildsong didn't break the code, and Primrosekit was perfectly happy in IceClan.
Instead, he felt like a mouse under Wildsong's cold gaze. It seemed she watched him as he chatted with his Clanmates, watching for him to slip up. Brackenpelt dared as to talk with Clanmates behind her back, sharing not about her treachery but of how she was 'plotting revenge' against StarClan. It wouldn't be long before the rebellious words reached her ears, but Brackenpelt didn't fear death. He certainly wasn't afraid of Wildsong, but it was the pain of breaking Snowlight's heart that held his tongue. A thousand times a day he told himself he didn't want to be the bearer of bad news for her.
Once, just once, he was tempted to visit Snowlight in the nursery. But Brackenpelt had stopped short just outside of the nursery, listening to her gentle snores. He missed her in the warriors' den, feeling her fur pressed against his. He missed her kind voice whispering lovely things in his ear. He missed their hunts together, when they'd see who could catch the most prey. Most of all, he missed her.
~.~
Toadspots entered the nursery with a grave look implanted on his dark brown face. His green eyes were rounded with a rare case of sadness. At first Snowlight thought he was giving Softfeather more borage, but he carried no herbs. Instead he watched her, as if waiting for a cue. She flicked her tail curiously, glancing at the sleeping figure of Primrosekit beside her. "What is it?" she prompted.
"I . . . I'm afraid that Primrosekit isn't just some rogue's abandoned kit." Toadspots sighed. "When I spoke to StarClan the other night, I found that Primrosekit was stolen from GoldenClan, born with the name Specklekit. I have contemplated going to Emberleaf, but I have come to you first. Are you ready to give back Specklekit?"
Snowlight stared at him in horror. She couldn't believe her ears. Stolen . . . from GoldenClan? Primrosekit must have littermates in GoldenClan: Whitekit and Redkit, who she was asking about the other day! But Snowlight could hardly grasp this idea. This must mean . . . Wildsong lied. She stole her! Snowlight curled her tail protectively around Primrosekit. "No one is taking my daughter!" Snowlight gasped; the words were out of her mouth before she could think things through. She had called Primrosekit her daughter. This was the first.
"Listen. I know you've had a wonderful moon with Specklekit, but she has a worried mother. Emberleaf is waiting in my den for her," Toadspots murmured. "You see, we had a similar dream. Now, say your goodbyes and bring her out. She'll be better off with her family in GoldenClan."
He turned to go, but Snowlight stopped him. "Wait, Toadspots! Make sure Wildsong is punished! She stole Primrosekit!" Toadspots nodded, but Snowlight wasn't convinced he would follow through.
Snowlight rested her head lightly on Primrosekit, feeling the gentle rise and fall of her chest. "They won't take you, Primrosekit," Snowlight whispered, though she wasn't convinced she could uphold her promise. Not alone.
~.~
It didn't take long to guess why Emberleaf was here. If she were here for herbs, Toadspots would've given them to her and she'd have been gone by now. No. Emberleaf was here to collect Primrosekit. But that wouldn't happen. Snowlight wouldn't allow it. Brackenpelt knew this fact, yet he felt an eerie pang of worry for his former mate. He wished Wildsong dead this moment. Because of her, this chaos funneled faster than a rabbit running from a hunter. Because of her, Snowlight was forced into this fretful decision. Because of her, Brackenpelt had been hiding in plain sight. But not anymore. He wouldn't let a crazy abductor ruin his life. No.
Brackenpelt headed over to the nursery without hesitating. He knew what he had to do now. As he walked, he forgave Snowlight. He forgave Toadspots for his daughters' deaths. Who he didn't forgive was Wildsong. He entered the milk-scented den, not in the least surprised to see Snowlight with a defensive snarl on her face. When she saw it was him, the snarled faded to a look of shock. It had been so long since they'd officially talked — or really, even seen each other. Snowlight was as beautiful as ever and even Primrosekit seemed to have a glow. Brackenpelt felt a pang in his heart. He wished he hadn't shunned them. He wished he could've acted in as Primrosekit's father.
"I won't let either of you go that easily," Brackenpelt meowed, giving Snowlight a lick between her ears. He leaned down to do the same to Primrosekit too. Because of her, Snowlight wasn't still moping around. Because of her, she'd forced Brackenpelt and Snowlight into their worst. But also because of her, Brackenpelt began to realize how important Snowlight was to him. Primrosekit. That wasn't such a bad name. Rosekit and Cloudkit would always be waiting for them in StarClan.
"I love you, Brackenpelt," Snowlight whispered.
Brackenpelt felt a purr rumble in his throat. "I love you, too."
~.~
"Primrosepaw! Primrosepaw! Primrosepaw!" Brackenpelt, Snowlight, and all the others chanted. Primrosepaw puffed her chest in pride, her green eyes shining. She pranced off to boast to Softfeather's jealous kits.
Snowlight gazed happily at her third daughter. She wasn't an apprentice of GoldenClan, because of Brackenpelt. He'd told Emberleaf off. He'd made Wildsong pay. He'd convinced everyone that Primrosekit belonged in IceClan. Oh, Snowlight loved him. One day, they'd have their own kits once more. But for now, Primrosepaw was all they needed.
"I have a surprise for you," Brackenpelt murmured, leading her out of camp. "But close your eyes." Snowlight obliged, following his voice as he guided her through the territory. He warned her of things in her way, so she didn't stumble. Snowlight wondered where he was taking her.
She didn't have to wonder long.
"Open!" Brackenpelt commanded, and when she opened her eyes, she was faced with a silvery pool that glimmered like starlight. On the surface danced two little she-kits, one white and one dark ginger. They played and pounced on each other, squeaking and making harmless threats.
But what struck Snowlight the most was their eyes. They were eyes she had never seen.
Rosekit and Cloudkit's eyes were green.