I used to be normal. I had a normal school, normal friends, I played normal games, and had a normal name, Dalton. My life was just normal. That is until I ran away from home. I still don't remember why I did it. All I know is that my regret for that one mistake weighs down upon me like a large mountain, trapping me within a dark precipice unable to breathe or move. I wish I could go back to the way things were. I wish it with all of my heart but, the unwarranted truth is that I am stuck here until I die. This truth has taken root in all of us forcing many to commit suicide if we can. Others of us are just too damned scared to die and to weak to fight. The latter was me.
I hadn't always been that way though. I once thought I was brave. One of the best on my block. Nobody tried to start things with me, and everyone in the neighborhood wanted to run with me. That ego boost is what lead me to believe that pleasure island was such a good idea. Looking back, that filthy man in the alley behind the drug store was more than just shady but, at the time we thought he was cool and took the flask he had offered us and drank it with gusto. No adult had ever offered us alcohol, so needless to say we were more than eager to trust him. To trust a stranger that would ultimately lead us to our demise. That cursed island. It had been fun at first, but that fun was so brief compared to the long, cold, terrifying nights that blanket us now. We are here, because we did not fully become what they wanted us to become. Apart of us is still human, and that scares them. However human that part of us may be we can no longer live among the villages of our births. The madness of Pleasure Island has changed us, both outward and inward.
I can still remember the pain of the change. My bones twisting and turning as the brown hair grew all over my body. That fear would come to be nothing compared to what I would face later however, but right then at that moment it was the worst possible fear that I had experienced. I remember strongly how hard it was to breath, and I gasped and coughed as harsh hee haw's slipped from my throat. It was at that moment I knew I was no longer a young boy. Standing on shaky legs I glanced up at a nearby mirror that hung loosely on the wall and I collapsed in terror as the visage of a donkey appeared before me. It had my clothes on but it wasn't me.
Frantic, I jumped to my feet and ran wildly out the door of the bar and into the street. All around me donkey's pranced in panic, some yowling like animals and others screaming like children. In fear I ran. I don't know where I was planning on running to, I just knew that I had to get away. Nothing like this was happening. Nothing like this could happen. Those words echoed in my head again and again as my short legs carried me through the crowded streets all the while bumping into other frantic bodies as I made my way down to the coach that had brought us here. I screamed out to the few adults that stood there and they only grinned devilishly in my direction and began to laugh as my body collapsed once more, this time more from exhaustion then terror.
I was dizzy, and in shock. My body seemed like it was on autopilot as we were sorted out between those of us that retained our human sentience and those of us that had become a complete animal. They determined this by forcing everyone into long lines and asking us our name. I debated over and over again what my answer should be. Those that appeared to be an animal were thrown into a corral near the boats while those that spoke in a human tongue were tossed into a separate corral placed near a thick mountain wall far from the docks. I had been taking my time to weigh my options on this matter and attempt to decipher which choice would be the wisest however, my decision would be made for me as I approached the large coachman that had brought us here.
"Ah, little fellow you are quite silent now," he said in a voice that to this day still sends shivers up my spine. It was sickeningly sweet and filled with mockery as he eyed me joyously. "You were so eager to beg for our help earlier." He continued to stare at me as his smile faded. "You may not speak now but, those clothes you wear speak enough. I remember you vividly lil guy." He threw back his head and let out a deep and guttural laugh before kicking me out of line with a heavy black boot. I cried, there in the dirt, not looking up at him as a man dragged me over to the stall by the mountain.
I lay there where they had thrown me as other donkey boys began to huddle around me, all of them shivering, and all of them crying. Some murmured lies to themselves of everything being okay, while others made poorly devised plans of escape, there voices holding no confidence in either of these notions. I said nothing. I couldn't find any words to say nor did I think there were any that could be said for our situation. At least nothing that would instill any form of hope. It was in my silence I heard much. Both from the other donkeys and the men that made their ways back and forth amongst the lines of animals. They repeatedly stated facts about salt mines for the unspoken donkeys and sales to rich businessmen that had just opened up new businesses of their own. I couldn't help but feel a little lucky. I life of hard labor would be all they could hope for. Endless hard labor every day with nothing but a cold blanket at night. Most probably would end up working themselves to death. That fate seemed to bring a single shard of hope to my heart as I reasoned that we would not be suited for such work. We were far to intelligent for that, not merely dumb animals. Then I frowned as a new thought raced through my mind. Were they just going to kill us? I understand now that death could have been all that we would hope for. Because our fate was going to be far worse than we could have imagined.
I had drifted to sleep at some point. I don't exactly remember when but the long hours of just sitting and worrying took everything out of my already weakened form. When I had awoken the other "regular" donkeys were gone and our corral had grown only a little more crowded.
"Looks like most of them changed completely this time," a tall man laughed and sucked down a bit of a cigarette. "That means we can make more money this time around." He and another man laughed as they walked away and I looked around frantically at the donkeys that lay around me. Some still cried while others just sat in silence. All of them had a look of gloom and sadness that related more of a sense of giving up then the fear they had previously possessed. I couldn't help but feel that I had slept through something important and brought up the courage to question what had been said.
At first, none of them said anything but I persisted. "Come on please," I begged. "What's going to happen?" Finally, one of the donkey's turned to me. His gaze meeting mine.
"They are gonna take us to a place they called the Pleasure Island Paradise," he whimpered.
I raised a brow. "That doesn't sound as terrible as I expected." My own words almost shocked me. Whatever the place was it surely wouldn't be at all pleasant. In fact I was sure that whatever did await us would prove to more terrifying than the name would have suggested.