Sometimes eyes wandered of their own accord as minds left the present time to think of the past, and that for a nation was both dangerous waters and calm, peaceful ones.
Feli for instance can think of a time where relation and pasts meant nothing, where being young was a drug as well as the desire of finally being independent and nearly being there.
He could remember Romano's lips on his own as if Spain had went up in smoke and Holy Rome had never existed.
Feliciano could nearly smell the wine that they sipped.
He could remember the gentle feel of fingers in his hair though they never seemed to try to tempt and as so, avoided his curl.
The North Italian could remember joyous laughter and the rush of heated skin as the hours drew later.
He could recall a tongue that knew far too much for its youth and hands that had memorized the North Italian's body as if it were his own.
Feli knew better though now when he heard Romano's sloppy goodbyes to spend his days with the one that had stolen his first kiss though never had he stolen his virginity that had seemingly fallen into Feli's hands as it had been their first time with anyone together.
He knew Romano like the back of his hand, knew whenever Romano's mind strayed to Spain as it always contained more happiness and softness in his eyes than whenever he thought of Feli, his sweet, a bit uninocent brother.
Feliciano knew the forbiddenness of what their relationship had been which people never failed to remind him of accidentally, and sometimes it left him wondering if Lovi left so fast because of such harsh judgement to go visit Spain.
Feli knew better than to ponder that as he knew that Lovi could avoid rumors and strongly never seem to think of them or act on them until he was alone, eager to cry for the guilt and the fear and every mixed emotion in him.
Sometimes he heard his brother cry over his relationship with Spain though Romano wasn't homophobic not in the slightest as he'd never quite been with a woman in any romantic relationship despite his bisexual crushes.
Lovi still felt fearful of how badly his and Spain's relationship could go.
Feli wished them both well though Feliciano could never claim to still romantically love his brother, sometimes his mind just wandered like that in a way that he felt every nation had to; there was too much history not to.
He was with someone else now though history never failed to rear its ugly head and bring back old thoughts, desires, and temptations.
Memories, they were called.
They hurt to think about, so Feli would put a smile back on his face and pretend that the past never existed.
Luddy never knew of his own boyfriend's strength in that regard.