A/N: So, this is my very first fan fiction and I hope you will like it. I'm a Mer/Der shipper, lol. I know my English isn't perfect, I'm Swedish but I do my best . Please, please, please review!

Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's anatomy.

The feeling inside him when he saw Meredith in the vet's office won't go away. He's been telling himself it is a natural for a friend to react in the way he did. To feel as if though your heart has been shattered into a million pieces, as if though someone just has punched you in the stomach. It was the same feeling he had gotten when she talked to Mark, and when she told him what had happened to George. He knew what it was but didn't want to accept it. Jealousy. He can't feel like this. He is married; he has a wife to whom he has an obligation. He can't throw away eleven years of marriage for a fling with an intern, can he?

Deep inside he knew Meredith is neither a fling nor a friend; they could never be friends even though he's really trying to make it work. He wants to be her friend to be allowed to be near her, and he tries to get her out of his head but it is impossible. It is Meredith he dreams about at night, it is her he thinks about every waken moment, but he can't give in. He knows he have no right to be mad at her; after all, it was he who left her. He broke her heart and can't accept that she is trying to fix it. He knows he isn't being fair to her. But he can't help it.

They haven't spoken since their argument in the staircase. He avoids her and she avoids him. They are successful for almost a whole week until she is assigned to work with him for the day. He doesn't meet her eyes all day, he can't. He doesn't speak to her unless it is absolutely necessary, and then it is in short words and a cold voice. Everyone around them has noticed something is up. The tension between them is undeniable. Even Addison, who normally would be quite content with Derek not speaking to Meredith, has noticed something is up.

After another week, Meredith can't take it anymore. They've once again worked together all day, without speaking. She confronts him in the staircase once again. She grabs his arms as he attempt to continue up the stairs. He quickly turns to face her and she meets his normally dreamy eyes, the only thing she can see is hatred and disgust.

"What did I do wrong?" She asks in a low voice before he can run away again. His expression softens a little bit, but he doesn't respond. He can't. What is he supposed to say? There are no excuses for the way he have behaved and he knows it.

"I fell in love with you, Derek, but you broke my heart. You have to let me heal, and I can't do it when you are behaving like this. You have no right to be upset with me, you have to let me do this." She meets his eyes again and all of the hatred and the disgust is gone. She can see the pain in his eyes when he looks at her and whispers:

"I'm sorry." She doesn't know what to say and neither does he, so she turns to walk away, but he grabs her arm and stops her. "Meredith, please wait…" she slowly turns around towards him again.

"I'm sorry I've been an ass the past to weeks, I know I have no right to be mad at you, or yell at you, or do anything at all. But I… " He didn't know how to say what he was about to say.

"But you what?" Meredith asked impatiently. He met her eyes again.

"I… I love you." She looked away hastily and shook her head.

"No, no, you can't do this to me. You just can't. It isn't fair. I'm moving on, I've got Finn, you've got Addison, you can't do this…" She had started walking around speaking to herself rather than to Derek. Tears were starting to form in her eyes and she turned away from him.

"Mer…" He begged her to look at him.

"No! You can't do this! I'm over you!" She was crying now. He looked at her, his eyes dreamy again. He could see the pain in he eyes and felt tears well up in his own. Without thinking, he reached out for her and pressed her up against his chest before she could protest. She tried to get away from him, but he didn't let go. Finally she relaxed a little bit in his arms and he let out breath he didn't realize he had been holding. She leaned her head against his strong chest and her sobbing became more silent. He allowed himself inhale her scent as he held her tighter to him. As they stood there, clinging to each other, neither of them knew what was going to happen in the future. The only thing that mattered was the she was his Meredith and was her McDreamy…

A/N: So, this is it! I know it's kind off short and I don't know if it is any good. Please tell me if I should continue.. and please REVIEW! Thanks