Summary: Carly is being depressed lately. What's going on and can someone save her from herself before its too late?

This is my first iCarly fanfic.

My brother, Spencer, was sitting on the couch making one of his crazy sculptures when I entered the room. He immediatly looked up. "How was school, Carls?" I looked up at him using my same monotone voice that I have used the past days. "Normal."

He gave me a worried glance before I walked to the kitchen. I quickly grabbed a snack for myself and I headed up to my room to do my homework.

The homework was pretty easy. The depression state I have been in lately actually helped to improve my grades. Weird, huh? Not really. I have been trying to avoid Sam and Freddie as much as possible. That's why I decided to only pay attention in class and go to the library during lunch period.

To be honest, I haven't spoken to Freddie and Sam since the last iCarly webshow. We still did that together and then I had to act like I'm happy while I really wasn't. Then I would send them home as soon as possible before crying myself to sleep.

I knew this seemed bad and I knew that I was depressed, but I just felt miserable and disgusted. This has been going on for almost 3 weeks now.

Suddenly I heard Spencer call. "Freddie and Sam are here. They want to talk to you." Knowing that I couldn't make up some excuse, the first thought in my mind was to run away quickly. But where? The bathroom!

As fast as I could, I ran to the bathroom and locked it. I heard Freddie and Sam searching for me. "Spencer, are you sure she is at home?" Freddie asked. I heard Spencer responding, but I was distracted by a razor blade.

It almost looked like it was asking me to make a cut. No, I couldn't do that. Then again what could it hurt. Maybe it would really help relieve some of my pain.

My hand gently grabbed it and I nervously brought it up to my wrist. It slid slowly across my wrist. Some blood came out of the fresh wound, but not much. I looked at it and it actually felt kind of good.

I slid it across my wrist another time. Gosh, this one hurt. Lots of blood came out. Shoot, this couldn't be good. I started to panic, but the panic slowly faded away as I started to feel light-headed. I could hear the faint voices from Spencer, Freddie, and Sam before everything faded black.

My eyes fluttered open. This wasn't my bed. I looked around suddenly realizing I was in a hospital. Spencer was sitting next to me. He was sleeping. I must have been here for a long time. My eyes wandered around.

After a minute, a doctor came in and smiled at me. "Hello, I'm Doctor Jameston." I nodded for him to continue. "You've lost quite some blood and have been out for 2 days. After a couple of days, you can go home, but your brother will tell you more about that." I just looked at him and he went away.

Spencer was still asleep. I didn't want to wake him, because he seemed like he needed it and didn't want to talk about me almost killing myself thing. Even though it was an accident. I just wanted to lose some pain.

The hope of Spencer staying asleep soon faded as he stirred and woke up. He looked at me before smiling with relief and hugging me. "Thank god, you're okay. We were so worried about you. Dad even came."

I looked at him with schock evident in my eyes. If dad came, it was not good. He only came during a major crisis.

Dad used to be home all the time. Well, that was before mom died. He stayed until Spencer could take care of me. Then he made his career his life. We barely ever saw him only in a major crisis. We didn't even see him during Thanksgiving, Christmas, or our birthdays!

"I'll go get him." Spencer left and got dad. A few seconds later, he entered the room with dad. My dad hadn't changed much in 2 years. He had a new haircut and looked slightly older than I remembered, but that was about the only difference.

"Carly Thelesa Shay, don't ever scare me like that again. You can't go just scaring people like that. What went on in your head at that moment. People are going to think that you're crazy or that I'm not raising you well. You need to get some kind of punishment." My dad almost screamed at me. It scared me and I was on the verge of tears.

Spencer seemed to notice. "Dad, you're not helping. Give her some rest." My dad didn't listen. He kept on rambling. Spencer got mad at my dad and they started fighting with each other about me. How could they be fighting about me, when they didn't understand a thing going on?

Suddenly I got tired of it and raised my voice. "Stop it. You can't fight about it, if you don't understand it. You guys have no clue how I have been feeling the past weeks. It hasn't been fun for me too, you know. And dad, you have no right to tell me what to do, because you haven't raised me since I was 11. Spencer only has that right. He is my father figure. Please go."

My dad and Spencer both looked schocked at me. My dad looked hurt, but he did leave.

Spencer was quite and didn't know what to say. I turned around, because I didn't know what to say either.

After a while, he gently place a hand on my arm. "Kiddo, it's going to be okay. It really is. Just get some rest." Yeah, right!

_ Hope you like the first chapter! Reviews are always welcome!