Yay! Third fanfiction n.n' my friend Zope helps me lots (cookies for Zope). This idea came to me a while ago but I never really worked on it until now when I decided to write it down and detail it out a bit. I have problems with extending things out (you should see my college essays!) but lets see. The good thing about Marauders Era is that you can guess their personalities since we only know vaguely what they were like XD.
I'm posting other chapters to this story and working on them over Christmas so I hope you enjoy. People-shaped cookies for reviewers, no cookies for flames XD.
Dear Witch Weekly,
I have a problem, I think I might be gay. I feel so lost.
He's beauty in wizard form!
Every time I see him, it's his eyes I look at, craving his arms around me, his hands on me and his lips against mine.
Whenever I play Quidditch, it's his face I look for in the crowd and his voice I hear, calling my name with the crowds.
How can something that feels so perfect to me be so wrong to everyone else?
I watch him flirt with almost ever girl he sees and I know I do it too but when I do it, it's him I see myself flirting with. Sometime, I kid myself that, when he mentions he has spent the night with someone, that it's me who was laying with him.
Why can't it be me? Can't they see that love is love?
He won't feel the same, for that I'm sure, but, inside I'm dying.
Dear Witch Weekly, how do I tell my best friend I'm in love with him?
James relaxed in front of the fire, spreading out on the crimson carpet and staring at the low flames.
The hands on his watch turned to 3am as he picked at a stray thread. The common room was empty and when he sighed, it sounded as loud as a game of Exploding Snap.
For over a week, James had had difficulty sleeping and spent most nights in the common room, normally in the same spot in front of the fire, ignoring all suggestions from House Elves of going back to his dormitory ("So House Elves can make things tidy, Master") or trying to sleep ("Master looks tired and Master needs rest. Sleep would help Sir") but they had grown accustom to him after a few nights and began bringing mugs of warm drink with them for him, or having general conversations about Hogwarts.
Tonight though, he had ignored them and they had taken the hint, not engaging James in their usual banter and cleaning the room faster than they usually did, though they took it in turns to check if James had fallen asleep. He heard them leave after only an hour and pulled at the thread.
The portrait, that hung before the door to the common room, swung open and James was about to lift his head to see who it was when he heard the shrill giggle of one of the Fifth year girls, followed by the low murmur of Sirius Black, who was clearly wooing the girl with all the chat up lines he knew (which James had taught him).
She fell for them and allowed Sirius to pull her onto the long sofa which ran along the back wall of the common room.
James remained silent and pressed himself against the floor, desperate not to alert them of his presence. His body jolted as a sudden sob tore through him, though he managed to suppress it, as the sound of their lips furiously meeting reached his ears, and he squeezed his eyes shut, forcing a wayward tear from them down his face, sliding from his nose to the floor.
He felt cold at the sound of material moving and Sirius suggesting they move some place warmer, where they won't be interrupted.
More tears escaped his eyes and he pressed a hand against his mouth, trying not to let the sobs out. His body jolted again and he curled up, trying to find an easier way of not crying out.
The fifth year must have got cold feet because she made her excuses with a kiss and danced off to her dormitory, pausing on the stairs to blow a kiss at Sirius, who in return merely rolled his eyes and stood up.
James trembled violently as Sirius approached the fireplace and made to throw himself on one of the chairs.
"Prongs?"
He stared at the curled up figure in disbelief and crouched next to him.
James turned his face into the carpet, desperate to muffle his sobs and hide his tears from Sirius.
"Merlin's beard! James?"
He laid a hand on James' back and moved it in a jerky fashion, unsure whether it would help or not since he had only seen women do that to crying babies.
James' body jolted again as a silent sob took over.
"James?"
Sirius settled onto his knees as James began to calm down. James slowly tilted his face to look at Sirius.
"James…"
Sirius' voice had become an unnatural whisper as he stared at his best friend, taking in the puffy skin that surrounded his hazel eyes and the desperate expression dominating them.
Another tear fell down James' face as he sat upright, bringing his knees under his chin and biting his thumb, refusing to look at Sirius any longer.
"Mm sorry."
"Why?"
"Jussam"
"I didn't catch that. James! Will you please look at me! I feel as though I've done something wrong!" Sirius cupped James' face in his hands and pulled it up, forcing eye contact between them.
"Padfoot….I'm a fool." James blushed and smiled weakly.
"Lily again?"
"No."
"No?"
"No." James hiccupped and tried to pull away but Sirius wouldn't let him.
"So, what's wrong?"
"Me." His voice broke. "I'm wrong, I'm all wrong."
Sirius stared, confused.
"My father, he sent me a letter. I got it this morning. He kept talking about how he has met this witch and how she wanted her daughter to marry someone who was Pure-Blood and father said how I would be perfect for her and how we'd be continuing the bloodlines and that I'd make him proud. He…he doesn't understand!"
The words poured out so fast Sirius could only blink. James felt more tears slid down his face and closed his eyes.
"What doesn't he understand?"
James hiccupped again and pulled Sirius' hands from his face, not letting go of them.
"I don't like girls."
"Oh?"
"I … I think I love…" James opened his eyes and bit his lip.
"I think I'm in love with you."
YAY! Finished! It's getting there; I can extend on things if i try…kinda… So … cookies for reviews n.n! and apologies for spelling mistakes!
I had a major accident typing this out! ToT !! I finished the whole thing on an old laptop and I hit the power cable!!! The laptop died!!! Luckily it got recovered sweatdrop
COOKIES!