This is not need. This is not lust. This is pure simple love, and the actions that spawn from it are inevitable, uncontrollable.
Pure, untainted love
Something that could never be broken
A relationship based on trust, on faith
Not lust.
Something that should be cherished.
Pure innocence.
Born out of darkness.
You watched him. You have watched commander Shepard. That was a different kind of passing thought. You wanted that which you could not have. It was a natural thought, but a passing one. He was "out of your league." He wouldn't take a second look at you as anything more than a friend and an ally. His compliments were nothing more than the simple facts.
You wonder what hurt the most…
His ignorance of your feelings.
Or...
His cruel gentle and kind gesture toward you.
This month, this dead month: this is when you really get to know Shepard intimately. The days after a mission, he spend time with you. You start to learn and understand what makes his tick. At heart, Luke Shepard is a contradiction, as mysterious inside as he is on the outside. He is a man at once both chained and empowered by his responsibility. He understands and cherishes his allies and friend yet wants desperately to escape them. From the beginning, his fate has been arranged for him. Saren, the Geths and the Reapers.
He intrigues you. There is something about him that sets him apart from all the other rare humans you have met. There's something in the way he handle so many thing; it is his believes in justice and the fact that he was a good man who believed in doing the honorable thing. He believed that good could triumph over evil that draw you to him. He came from a military family and he was the war hero, the soldier, admired by all.
That's when you realize that you're in love. More than mere attraction, you realize how genuine and insistent your feelings are for him. In an instant, that much becomes clear to you. The hard part is getting him to love you. You don't want him to have to love you. You want him to love you for who you are, the way you love him.
You are not sure when you realized it. It wasn't some sudden, blinding revelation -- more like a gradual acknowledgement of the truth. It crept upon you subtly, almost insinuating its forbidden presence into your mind.
It was a strange feeling -- this subtle bliss, a confidence in something more. You had not possessed it before. It changed you, now, little by little. Sometimes, only sometimes, you would meditate and you would focus on that feeling inside.
It made you tremble. It made you feel like you were bursting with energy, ready to leap into song as if this was some ancient tale told by a fireside. It made you weak, yet it made you strong. You were vulnerable, so very vulnerable, concerning that. And yet, this feeling gave you a sense of complete purpose and contentment. Restlessness became a feature of the past when you dwelled on it.
A feeling, a sense of knowledge spoken of in many a tale; a feeling rebuked and rejoiced in. Described in every way, in the blooming of a flower, in the birth of new life.
Attachment…
Such a simple word for such a complex, unknowable thing.
To cast such upon him was not something you would do, not something you could bring yourself to burden him with. You would be with him sometimes, You would watch him, and be with him.
You would love him, and hope it would be enough.
How was that even possible?
You two had almost nothing in common.
You were from two different species.
But…
…
Soldier and scientist.
Fire and water.
Shepard and Liara.
You found out that all this didn't really matter after all.
Whoever was he going to love…
Whatever your heart would break or not
You would still love and admire this wonderful person.
Despite the death, the blood, the corpses that surrounded her, Liara T'soni still felt that Luke Shepard was the strongest and beautiful thing she had ever seen and loved.
Yes...You would love him and you hope it would be enough.