NOT MEANT TO BE

by ardavenport

*-o-*-o-*-o-* Part 1

Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi waited alone in the private meditation room.

The door slid open.

Archivist Jocasta Nu entered, holding a cube in her two small palms before her.

"Master Kenobi," she said respectfully. She set the cube down on the thin plinth before him. "Master Doombas's holocron about his, um, excursion with Master Qui-Gon Jinn." Nu bowed to him with a polite smile and he returned it.

"Thank you."

She turned and swept from the room.

What a difference being appointed to the Jedi Council made, Obi-Wan thought. Not that Jocasta Nu had been too unpleasant to him before, but as soon as he entered the Archives she left two patrons, a couple of young Padawans, to attend to him. No waiting.

At least not at the Archives.

The war was making him wait. That happened a lot. Preparations for battles. Sieges. Patrolling. Supplies for millions of clone troops. They all required huge amounts of waiting, at the end of which would be a calamity of furious fighting, tragedy and death. Piles and piles of the dead on the battlefield afterward.

Obi-Wan did not like war. But the rest of the Council said that he was good at it, so they appointed him to their ranks three rotations ago.

And they made him wait. . . .

. . . . for intelligence reports about where the Separatists were moving their ships and battle droids. His former Padawan, Anakin Skywalker, had found other things to occupy himself with, which suited Obi-Wan well. The young Knight was not good at waiting, and even worse at hiding it since he rarely did. But he was terrifyingly good at war. And when they worked together, they were even better at it.

Obi-Wan would com him as soon as they got the necessary intelligence report. But for now. . . .

The holocron sat before him. The center glowed faintly greenish blue.

Years ago, when he was a Padawan, he had planned to take this journey someday with his former Master, Qui-Gon Jinn. He had not even known what it was then. He just knew that Qui-Gon sometimes took other Masters of the Temple out on quests for the Living Force. They would be gone for days, delving into the deeper knowledge of the Force that only Masters shared amongst themselves. Qui-Gon never spoke about it to him, but other Masters would continue to inquire when the next quest would be. So, Obi-Wan assumed that it was enlightening.

After he was knighted, he had planned to request that Qui-Gon take him alone, just the two of them, and show him the Living Force. But the emergence of the Sith ended that ambition, along with Qui-Gon's life back on Naboo. And now there was war and no time for any ambition but fighting it. Ending it.

That morning, Obi-Wan had woken up with the realization that with Anakin Knighted and his appointment to the Council, he now had the experience, or at least the rank, to find out what had happened on those quests.

He had been disappointed to discover that Qui-Gon never made his own holocron. But someone who had gone with him one time did.

The Force alive around him, he passed his hand over the cube. It opened. The Force-form of Master Doombas appeared above it.

Doombas's image was broad in the shoulders, bald on top of his head, long hair tied in back, a full beard and mustaches covered the lower half of his face. And the image stood on two whole legs. Obi-Wan supposed that there was no reason for a holocron to have the artificial leg that Obi-Wan seen him with in life.

Doombas scowled:

_._._._._Before I start, I will tell you now that you should find this information yourself. Go on this quest with Qui-Gon Jinn. That would tell you better than this pale imitation.

"I can't," Obi-Wan said quietly. "Qui-Gon is dead. And we're at war. I must settle for learning what I can."

The holocron looked surprised. Then sad. This it nodded.

_._._._._Then I will start at the beginning. . . .

_._._._._When Master Dooku's first Padawan was seventeen, he told his Master that he needed to find his connection to the Living Force.

_._._._._His Master asked him, 'Why? Have you misplaced it?'

_._._._._It was a sarcastic answer to a pretty strange statement. Dooku's Padawan was exceptionally strong in the Living Force, the strongest in the Temple some said. If anyone had a true connection to the Living Force, it was him. But apparently Qui-Gon Jinn did not think he was as strong with it as he thought he should be. He had plateaued in his skills as a Jedi apprentice; he was not improving in his abilities despite his Master's training. Dooku had no complaints; Qui-Gon was an exceptional student. But his Padawan felt like he had stagnated and until he found out why, he could never be as powerful a Jedi as he should be. He thought that the problem was that he did not have as deep a connection to the Living Force as he should.

So, he had to find his true connection to the Living Force.

_._._._._'Go find it then,' his Master said. He was also probably grumpy about his Padawan announcing that he had to go elsewhere than his Master's side for his learning.

_._._._._So, Qui-Gon Jinn left his Master's room, left the living area levels, left the Temple. To go find his true and more stronger connection to the Living Force.

_._._._._Five rotations later, the Jedi Council assigned Dooku and his Padawan to go on a mission and was surprised to be informed that only Dooku was available because his Padawan was still out looking.

_._._._._Dooku assured the Council that his Padawan was capable and always had good reasons for the things he said, no matter how unusual.

_._._._._The Council accepted this and sent Dooku on the mission alone.

_._._._._Seven rotations after that, after Dooku had returned from that first mission, they sent him on another one. Alone. Because his Padawan was still out on his quest.

_._._._._The second mission took a little longer. And when Dooku returned ten rotations later, his Padawan had still not returned.

_._._._._Dooku was beginning to think that his Padawan was a bit dimmer than he'd thought, taking so long to find the Living Force right in front of him, but Qui-Gon Jinn turned up the next day. . . . Unwashed. Wearing strange clothes. Having nothing on him that he had left with except his credit chit and his lightsaber.

_._._._._So his Master asked him where and how he found his true connection to the Living Force.

_._._._._Qui-Gon Jinn bowed and answered, 'I found it in myself, Master. I found my connection was not measured in my power or strength, but in my balance with the Living Force and my purpose. And my strength would come from that.'

_._._._._Dooku disagreed. A stronger connection to the Force always meant that Jedi would be more powerful; they went together. It looked to him as if his Padawan had gotten it backwards. But even he had to agree that his Padawan's focus and strength were much improved after his quest and led him to begin discussing with the Council the time for his Padawan's Trials. Members of the Council were impressed; they said that he had learned some things about the Force that even great Masters never understood. And he had found it all on his own, at his age, too.

_._._._._And that was that.

_._._._._Until a few years after Qui-Gon Jinn was knighted, when someone he knew asked him about how he trained to be be more powerful in the Living Force, since she had a Padawan who was strong with it and she felt that she was missing something.

_._._._._Qui-Gon Jinn said he had to show her, for her to really understand.

_._._._._But they had to ask permission. Dooku had all the authority he needed to let his Padawan go wander off. But Knights have duties. They asked the Council and they said, 'Yes'. As long as he took three of them with him, and a few other Knights, and they didn't take any longer than five rotations.

_._._._._So, they all went out.

_._._._._Five rotations later they came back. The three Council members approved. The Knight who first asked was exhausted. But she understood and could better train her Padawan. But a couple of the other Knights did not get it, even after Qui-Gon told them what was right in front of them. The Council told him that he should only take Masters after that, and they would only get three rotations.

_._._._._And that's the way it's been ever since. Every few years, Qui-Gon Jinn takes a group out on a journey to find their true connection to the Living Force. They usually get it, at least most of them. There are some in the Temple strong in the Living Force who have asked Qui-Gon Jinn to guide them. But he always takes them aside for a bit and then sends them out on their own. Says that's the best way. But he's happy to guide others who are a little slower but want to learn.

_._._._._So, if I tell you this, you have to vow to go out your own and find your true connection to the Living Force. This is empty time otherwise."

The small holocron-figure stood there with a challenging expression on its hairy face.

"If I am alive to do so, I will," Obi-Wan promised solemnly.

The holocron's expression softened before going on.

_._._._._Well, this is how it started for me. . . ."

_._._._._There were seven of us that Qui-Gon Jinn was leading. Me, Master Yoda, Elest Emordi, Jemjas, Peortamadanatu Bon, Shaak Ti and Yetor Icin. Pretty odd mix.

_._._._._I'd always been meaning to find out what Qui-Gon Jinn did on these things, but I would have thought that Master Yoda would have known all he needed about the Living Force. And I don't think he and Qui-Gon Jinn got along too well all the time.

_._._._._Elest, she didn't get along with a lot of people; maybe that's what she needed to learn.

_._._._._Yetor Icin is one of the finest saber masters in the Temple, not something you usually see in a Bith, and I wouldn't have thought he would be interested in Qui-Gon Jinn's wanderings.

_._._._._Jemjas hardly ever said anything, but she was strong in the Living Force; you could tell right away. She'd actually done this before. Guess she didn't get enough the first time.

_._._._._Peortamadanatu Bon and Shaak Ti looked like they were just curious, like me.

_._._._._We had three rotations. Our Padawans stayed back at the Temple. This was Master stuff. . . ."

Eyes closed, Obi-Wan Kenobi saw Doombas's journey . . . .

An open transport whizzed along in the traffic lanes of Coruscant. The buildings were all short. No towers. All unfamiliar buildings on the far side of the city-planet from the Jedi Temple. But also very familiar. The ever-present traffic and buildings could look very much the same on a planet-wide metropolis.

Slowing, a transport dipped out of the traffic lanes to the immense raised platform of a rest-stop. Transports and speeders of various sizes lined the edges of the platform while drivers and passengers stretched, wandered about and went in and out of the rest-stop buildings in the center of the platform.

The Jedi climbed out, everyone automatically looking to their guide, Qui-Gon Jinn. Taller than all the others in his dark brown robe, long brown hair with barely a touch of gray, he stood at the edge of the platform and apparently admired the traffic patterns.

Shrugging, Yetor Icin scratched the side of his bulbous pale head and walked in the direction of the rest area buildings. With a few backward glances, the others followed in a loosely formed group. Doombas clacked along next to Jemjas, Shaak Ti behind them, next to the float chair that carried the small green Master Yoda.

_._._._._We were all too smart to do anything as obvious as ask Qui-Gon Jinn what was going to happen. Learning is in the experience. But after we finished at the freshers and grabbed a few snacks from the stands we all wandered back. But Qui-Gon Jinn wasn't alone.

"Aaaaaaah, your disciples return," A stately male Human in a dark brown cape and Jedi tunics had arrived.

_._._._._There he was. The diplomat, standing right there. Qui-Gon Jinn's old Master. Dooku. He was taller than Qui-Gon Jinn, who is already pretty tall for a Human. He's taller than me at least.

_._._._._Qui-Gon Jinn looked had had little indigestions, now having eight in the group and one his old Master, too. Aaaaaaah, and you could feel the tension in the Force. Not like they didn't get along. More like they didn't belong together anymore. But they used to.

"Mmmmmmm, your presence missed much has it been at the Jedi Temple, Master Dooku," Yoda said, looking not surprised at all.

"I serve the Jedi Order as it demands. The Jedi Council has only to appoint another capable Master to my ambassadorial duties and I shall certainly be able to return," Dooku said, inclining his head toward his elder. Icin and Shaak Ti and all the others bowed to Dooku in greeting.

Yoda made a low grumble in his throat, nodding. "Much in demand your skills are. The Jedi Council is much pleased by your service."

"Thank you." Dooku smiled back. Next to him, Qui-Gon seemed to have accepted this unexpected addition.

"Pleased we are that join us for this journey you can," Yoda continued.

"It is fortunate that my duties allowed me this opportunity. I have been remiss all these years in not participating in my Padawan's quest sooner."

A flicker of suspicion flashed from Qui-Gon at Yoda before subsiding into acquiescence.

Dooku turned toward Qui-Gon. "Shall we begin?"

"We already have, " Qui-Gon replied with a serene and knowing smile.

"Oh, I do hate to be late," Dooku lamented. "Since we are limited to three rotations, and not the extended time you took on your original quest, then I must be more direct in declaring that I have come for enlightenment. And I would be most grateful for your guidance."

"I can guide," Qui-Gon acknowledged, "but only you can follow." He said this last part to the whole group before whirling about, taking a few running steps and leaping off the edge of the platform.

With an exasperated 'humph' Elest charged off the platform after him, the hood of her robe falling back off of her huge, frizzy hair. The others followed.

_._._._._It was a bit over-dramatic starting things off by plunging down into the lower levels of Coruscant. But I suppose drama has its place in things when you're looking for a revelation. We rode the Force all the way down, slowing up at the end just enough to land. I'd gotten used to my artificial leg. It's a machine, but when I need it, I can feel the Force connecting me to the ground through it. Not like real flesh or a lightsaber, but enough to get by.

_._._._._We all faced Qui-Gon Jinn where we landed - some flat public space - deep in the canyons, only a band of sky light pretty far above, and Qui-Gon started to say something, but he got interrupted. . . .

"I can guide you, but - - -"

WHMPH!

*-o-*-o-*-o-* End Part 1