"I can't believe that we have a baby," Lauren remarked as she and Camila stared at the tiny little baby currently swaddled and sleeping in the bassinet that stood before them. They had only been home from the hospital for a little bit but their eyes had not left the new life in the house.
"I still can't believe that we have a baby girl," Camila sighed dramatically. "We don't have anything for her. What are we going to do?"
"It won't kill her to sleep in a blue room for a while," Lauren teased as she pulled Camila into her lap, finally sitting down on the couch.
"Lo get serious!"
"I am! And I am quite serious that we need to find a new obstetrician when we go for baby number two."
"Well it wasn't her fault; it was the ultrasound technician who made the mistake."
"Three times Camz!" Lauren insisted, wrapping her arms tightly around Camila's waist. "You had three ultrasounds during your pregnancy. You'd think they would know the difference between a peni..."
"Don't say stuff like that in front of her!" Camila interrupted her with a frown. "Besides we have bigger things to discuss other than his mistakes. We really need to give our daughter a name."
Lauren nodded, smiling at "our daughter", "Jonathon is certainly not a match for my new little butterfly."
"Butterfly?" Camila questioned, looking down at her wife from where she was sitting on Lauren's lap.
"I thought I'd call her butterfly as a little nickname." Lauren shrugged, looking at the brunette. "What, you don't like it?"
"No it's adorable and quite fitting. You keep swaddling her in that purple butterfly blanket anyway, good fit." Camila smiled, wrapping her arms around her neck, "That reminds me that we really need to thank your mom properly for getting that blanket and all those outfits so we could bring her home from the hospital. We're going to have to return like 99% of that baby boy stuff."
"One thing at a time baby, lets focus on the name first. I'll take care of all that other stuff later in the week." Lauren spoke softly, rubbing her lower back gently.
"Right...name! Focus Camila. My head is just all over the place," Camila apologized.
"You just had a baby; I give you full permission to be a little crazy right now." Lauren chuckled, kissing the crook of her neck.
"Gee thanks," Camila rolled her eyes as Lauren loosened her grip on her waist and began to stand up. "And where are you going?"
"To get that baby name book, we definitely need it now. It's in the office isn't it?"
"Actually I think it's in the nursery."
"Be right back then."
Camila watched Lauren go and as soon as she left the baby began to fuss. Camila moved fast, well as fast as she could for someone who had just given birth two days ago. It still felt like someone had ripped out her guts and stabbed in her the back...and let's not even talk about the pain she was experiencing below the waist.
"Shh honey, Mama's here," Camila practically cooed her soothing words as she picked up the now pink, screaming newborn. "Are you hungry?" Camila questioned as she carried her tiny girl back to the couch. "It has been a few hours since you last ate, huh." Camila unbuttoned her blouse and undid her nursing bra before lifting the baby to her chest. Much better, the baby was quite happy now. Camila on the other hand was still trying to get the hang of this nursing thing. It was still rather painful but she was determined to stick with it.
After grabbing the big book of baby names from the nursery, Lauren made her way back downstairs and back to the family room where she'd left her wife and newborn daughter.
Daughter... She had a daughter! She was a mother...those words were quite amazing to Lauren, but she loved them just the same. She was a little nervous, well very nervous to be exact about becoming a mother. Aside form the fear that she'd irrevocably screw up a kid's life, there was a deep-rooted fear that she wouldn't love her child enough. Of course she would love her baby, but she loved Camila with her whole heart and she was unsure how to love anyone as much as she did her wife. But the second she held their daughter in her arms, those fears subsided because she was automatically the new love in Lauren's life. It was like her heart doubled in size because now there were two loves of her life. Although she loved them both quite differently, Camila and their baby still took over her heart.
Lauren took her place next to her wife and set the book in her lap before leaning over and placing a kiss on her daughter's head. She then proceeded to give one to her wife as well. "You're amazing."
Camila grinned back, "You know you aren't getting anywhere near my body for the next six weeks."
"Yes I know," Lauren rolled her eyes; she had heard that from way too many people. "I just mean that...you're amazing. This," she pointed to their nursing daughter, "blows my mind. We've created the most beautiful baby and here she is surviving simply because of your nourishment."
"Whoa, since when did you get all philosophical on me Lauren Jauregui?"
"Camz, we have a baby."
"Trust me honey I know we have a baby, twenty two hours of labor, remember?"
"We're in our own house, alone with our own baby. And we can't give her back."
Camila sighed, "Lo, I know that you're a little disappointed that she's not a boy..."
"No not at all." Lauren quickly interrupted, needing to get her message across. Taking a deep breath, she continued. "It's just... a few days ago there were only two of us here and now there's three of us. I just feel whole you know. It's like there was something missing but I didn't even know it."
"Yeah I know exactly what you mean," Camila smiled as she caressed her daughter's silky smooth brown hair, the love she felt for her was out of this world.
Lauren gently cupped Camila's face and kissed her once again. The loving family moment that they shared just called for a kiss. "I love you."
"And I love you," Camila beamed back at her.
"You too our little nameless child." Lauren joked, dropping a kiss onto the newborns head.
Camila laughed heartily, "Ok, you need to open that book pronto."
Lauren opened the baby name book and pulled out a small list of baby names from the front. "Look, it's our names list before we found out we were having a boy who is now a girl."
"What do we have for girls names?" Camila asked as she peered at the list in Lauren's hand, her nose crinkling at it, "Hailey, eww!"
"If I recall, you picked that one Camz."
"I know, I know but I'm not really liking these names anymore." Camila murmured, examining the names. "Alexis...No. Chloe...I so don't think so."
"I like Samantha, that's nice isn't it?" Lauren suggested, taking her eyes off the list to look at her wife.
"It's alright but it's not my favorite."
"Zoë?"
"She's not a Zoë," Camila sighed as she looked at her feeding child; nope definitely not a Zoë. "You might as well rip that list up because I think that we need to start from scratch."
Lauren nodded slowly, she was afraid this was going to happen. It took them nearly four months to choose Jonathon as their 'son's' name. Somehow she didn't think their daughter would appreciate being 'hey you' for the first few months of her life. Long after the baby had been fed and burped (twice), Lauren and Camila were still browsing the name book.
"This is absolutely hopeless," Camila groaned as she threw the book down on the couch. They had just finished the A's and B's and were beginning to tackle to the C's. Already Camila was exhausted; there was no way she could do this anymore.
"We have a few," Lauren was now holding the sleeping baby who looked incredibly tiny in her arms.
"I just...why is this so hard for us?" Camila sniffled, reaching up and swiping the tear from her eye.
"Camz, please don't cry," Lauren carefully grabbed her hand after making sure that she had a good grip on the baby with her other.
"I'm sorry," Camila sniffled once again as she leaned into her wife. "I'm just so tired and I know that my hormones are still out of whack."
"Why don't you take a nap? She's sleeping and probably will for a while."
"But it's almost six o'clock; Ally, Mani and Dinah are coming by with dinner soon."
"They will totally understand that you need to rest. Hell Ally will probably yell at me if you don't." Lauren said with a roll of her eyes, already hearing the lecture her friend and former band-mate had in store. "Besides they're not coming to see you, they're coming to see her," Lauren grinned as she looked at her daughter.
"I'll just wait until after dinner," Camila shook her head. "I am kind of hungry.. Plus, I've eaten us out of house and home. I didn't get to stock up at the store before I went into labor."
Lauren grinned at her, "My little pig."
Camila stuck her tongue out at her at that, not appreciating her name-calling.
Lauren laughed, throwing her head back as Camila smiled at the sound coming from her wife. She loved her laugh more then anything.
"So, back to the book?" The younger one asked after the laughter died down.
"Are you sure?" Lauren questioned, she knew this was taking quite a toll on Camila and that was the last thing she wanted.
"Lo, I want her to have a name as soon as possible."
"Can I make a suggestion?"
"Honey of course, she's got fifty percent of you running through her I think that you do have a say in the matter."
"I was thinking about this right after she was born but I guess I pushed it to the back of my mind." Lauren hesitated, chewing her lip. "What do you think of Avia?"
"Avia?" Camila asked, somewhat shocked. "Come on Lauren, stop playing around."
"I'm not kidding Camila. It's a good name."
"Don't you think it's a little odd that we'd name our child after a dream?"
"A dream that played a really big part of our life, it's ultimately what brought us together. Do you think you ever would have had the courage to tell me how you feel had it not been for that dream?" Lauren urged, raising an eyebrow at the smaller girl.
"No but..."
"But what? Maybe its fate, maybe she is meant to be Avia. Clearly there's a reason that she's not a boy."
"But..."
"You like the name, I know you do. I can tell."
"Well it is nice and it's the best so far." Camila murmured, still not fully convinced.
"I think we should name her Avia, we already looked through girls names a few months ago and those names from your list were your top picks and suddenly you don't like them anymore. I don't think the name game is going to get any better."
"I just want her to have the best name, you know? She has to live with this name forever. I just want it to be the perfect fit," Camila sighed as she caressed her daughter's face.
"I think she looks like a Avia," Lauren stated as she watched Camila touch their baby, with all the gentleness of a natural born mother.
"Avia," Camila practically whispered but their little angel's eyes opened and sparkling emerald eyes met Camila's.
"See she likes it," Lauren giggled, happy to see her daughter awake. This was their first night home and she wanted to keep her up as much as she could. She knew the night would be a killer and she genuinely felt bad that Camila would be doing most of the work. She just didn't have the milk to take care of her daughter's hunger but she was going to try her best to stay up with Camila. Hopefully, with their next baby that she was going to carry, Camila would do the same.
"Okay, lets do it then," Camila grinned as her baby girl attempted to stretch out her long legs but was stopped by the blanket around her.
"Are you sure?" Lauren thought it would take a little more convincing.
Camila nodded, "You're right, she most definitely looks like an Avia."
"Hello Avia, hello, hello, hello," Lauren cooed as she lifted Avia up to her chest.
"Finally we can get her birth certificate."
"Yeah we'll take care of that tomorrow." Lauren nodded, pressing a soft kiss to Avia's forehead.
"Sounds good with me."
"So we have Avia, looks like Emmi is next."
Camila smirked, her brown eyes sparkling. "Have fun with that pregnancy."
Lauren snorted and looked down at the baby. "If mine is anything like yours, then I'll be horny and hungry 24/7."
Camila ignored her, her cheeks now tinted red, "You know she needs a middle name."
"Oh god." Lauren sighed, thinking to herself; here we go again.
"I have one and I think you'll like it too."
"Alright lay it on me."
"Avia Elizabeth Jauregui, don't you think that's pretty?"
"Yeah I do." Lauren smiled, looking down at their baby, gently stroking the back of her neck with her thumb.
"Avia Elizabeth Jauregui, how does it feel to finally have a name?" Camila gushed, tickling her covered feet.
"Fantastic," Normani replied as she, Ally and Dinah made their way into their friends family room. "I like it and it's about time."
"Hey, how'd you guys get in?" Lauren questioned their friends, her eyebrows furrowed.
"Lauser, we've known the garage code since you moved in," Dinah grinned. "You two are so predictable with those things."
Ally pushed past both Normani and Dinah to get to the newest addition of the house. "Give me my goddaughter, my little sweet Avia. I like it too, good choice. I thought you'd have named her Zelda."
"Oh good, we just came up with it," Camila responded with a smile, ignoring the jab.
"Do you know how to hold her?" Lauren asked with a smirk as Ally reached down for her baby.
"Oh stop," Ally swatted her before picking up her precious goddaughter. "Oh you are just the most beautiful baby I have ever seen, yes you are," Ally cooed as she sat down next to Lauren while Normani took an armchair and Dinah took the loveseat.
"Way better looking than Lauren ever was," Normani snickered while the new mother ignored her.
"How are you feeling Mila?" Ally asked leaning forward to see the smaller woman, ignoring Normani.
"I'm tired and still a little sore but I know that's to be expected," Camila replied as Lauren wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulder.
"You really should sleep when she's sleeping, Mila; I want you to get as much rest as you can. Now there are a few exceptions but most babies are night owls and loud ones at that."
"And we all know that Lo won't be much help to you." Dinah piped up from her seat, giggling to herself.
"Hey," Lauren protested with a frown, she definitely resented that one.
"Let's face it Laur, you sleep like the dead," Normani put in. "It was a miracle to wake you up during our tours."
"I thought you guys were coming over to feed us not bash on me," Lauren glared at her friends.
"We did, we brought lasagna," Ally said quickly as she was entranced by Avia. Although this wasn't the first time she had seen her, this was the first time that she had been awake. "Oh Lauren she really does have your eyes, they're so beautiful," she said getting choked up.
"Ally, don't start crying, you've done enough of that already," Normani looked at her friend; she was just as emotional over the baby as Camila was.
"Oh leave me alone," Ally gave her friend a look. "I'm a very proud godmother!"
x
Later that night, long after Normani, Dinah and Ally left, Avia let her true colors show. The two day old newborn was not a fan of sleeping at night, in fact she preferred crying, lots of crying. Both Lauren and Camila were up each time her blood curdling screams filled their bedroom. There was no way Lauren could sleep through her cries so she was by Camila's side the whole night and vice versa. Camila was almost amazed at how much her daughter could cry; surely she should have tired herself out by now. Normally her daytime routine consisted of feeding and then going straight to sleep but that just wasn't the case.
"I don't know what to do," Camila felt like crying herself as she gently bounced Avia around her and Lauren's bedroom. "This isn't right, is it?"
"I don't know Camz," Lauren sighed as she watched Avia's face all contorted and bright red as she cried.
"She just ate, I burped her and you changed her. What's the problem?"
"Want to try that pacifier again?"
"I guess but I don't think that she likes it." Camila sighed, looking down at the crying baby.
"Here," Lauren stood up and joined her wife and baby, placing a small green pacifier into her mouth. She held it in place so that Avia could get accustomed to keeping it in her mouth. As soon as Lauren removed her hand, it fell out of her mouth.
"Ugh," Camila was extremely frustrated; no one ever said that motherhood was this hard. Why didn't she finish reading that parenting book?
"How about one of those swings?" Lauren suggested, running a hand through her dark locks.
"I highly doubt it's going to work but I'll try anything at this point," Camila was absolutely desperate, it was 3 am and she had only slept for an hour and forty five minutes and it had been in several increments.
"I'll be right back, think you can handle her for a minute?" Lauren didn't want to leave them alone but the swing was downstairs along with several other baby supplies that had yet to be put together.
"Go, one of us deserves some quiet for a minute," Camila forced a smile.
Lauren kissed her cheek and then Avia's head, "Mommy will be right back."
A few minutes later, Lauren brought up the newly assembled baby swing. Lucky for her it was easy to assemble because Lauren hated reading instructions. "Ok, let's try this out," she placed the swing on Camila's side of the bed. She didn't even have to ask; she just knew her wife wanted Avia closer to her.
"Is this safe?" Camila questioned as she carried the still crying baby over. "It's not going to like collapse on her?"
Lauren raised her eyebrow at the question. "Don't you trust me?"
"Do I have to answer?"
Lauren rolled her eyes, "Just give her to me." Camila gently handed Avia over to Lauren who just as gently put her in the new swing and strapped her in. With a press of a button, soothing lullaby music filled the room and Avia began slowly swinging without any crying.
"Oh my god! Lauren Jauregui you are a genius!" Camila threw her arms around her wife.
"I am, aren't I?" Lauren looked on proudly as Avia finally drifted off to sleep.
"If I wasn't so exhausted I would kiss you," Camila pulled away and quickly climbed into bed. "You better go to sleep too."
Lauren nodded as she walked over to the other side of the bed and turned off the lamp. She wrapped her arms around Camila and she snuggled into her. "Did you pass out yet?"
"No. I can't believe how easy that was; I think that swing is my new best friend." Camila murmured tiredly, burying her head into the crook of Lauren's neck.
"God bless whoever invented that thing."
"Amen to that one."
"The noise is a little annoying."
"Yeah but as long as she's sleeping, I don't really care."
"Good point." Lauren giggled, rubbing Camila's back soothingly.
"Mmm hmm," Camila mumbled before closing her eyes, hopefully for at least two hours.
"Love you Camz," Lauren kissed her cheek, knowing she had already entered dreamland. "Thanks for making me the happiest woman on the planet."
