Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, Edward, or a red BMW.
Rosalie, read this carefully. You will not throw this away. You will not burn this with your hairdryers.
1. You will not disconnect the cables in Bella's truck while she is asleep.
2. You will not lick you lips and say "I wanna go hunting today" while looking at Bella.
3. You will not help Alice kidnap Bella against Edward's will.
4. You may not overdose Bella's supper with cold medicine.
5. You may not overdose Bella's supper with any kind of medicine.
6. Or her breakfast.
7. Or her lunch.
8. You will not tell Carlisle that he left his pink Prada Tote in the trunk of your car while walking by a group of innocent
bystanders.
9. You will not threaten to incapacitate Alice when she steals your Green Stiletto heels.
10. You will not hotwire Edward's Volvo when he refuses to give you a ride.
11. You will not steal Jasper's old Confederate uniform and blame it on Emmett.
12. You will not steal Jasper's old rifle to shoot Emmett next time he steals your lip-gloss.
13. You shall not distract Esme while Alice repaints her kitchen.
14. You may not encourage Alice to set up a mini-mall in the kitchen.
15. And then take pictures to put on YouTube.
16. And then email them to everyone in Forks………………again.
17. You will not pay Mike Newton to flirt with Bella in front of Edward.
18. You shall not take Esme's hat collection and then attempt to sell them it back to her.
19. You may not call the therapists on Alice again and tell them that she is a shopping addict.
20. You may not bribe Emmett into letting you use his Jeep to do doughnuts in Bella and Edward's meadow.
21. You may not steal Emmett's video games, and put them in Jasper's closet.
22. Or Edward's closet.
23. Or Carlisle's closet.
24. And then accuse the aforementioned.
25. You may not call the therapists on Esme again an tell them that you are afraid she is stealing your hairdryers.
26. You may not sell Edward's piano on eBay
27. And then buy him a canary to take its place.
28. Also, you may not buy Jasper a pansy and ask if anyone can see the resemblance.
Rosalie, reread this and do not go against it, okay? Okay.
-Edward
Hey! Thanks to everyone who reviewed!(which was not many people)
R&R!